Ode to SARAH (at the least the beginning)
Okay Sarah (in CA), I think you would enjoy this quote. And for everyone else, I take it back there is one thing that i liked about the book, Franny and Zooey, and it's this:
"He had a theory, Walt, that the religious life, and all the agony that goes with it, is just something God sicks on people who have the gall to accuse Him of having created an ugly world."
Otherwise, life is okay right now. Things are finally calming down. I finished moving and cleaning my old apartment, and I think I'm getting use to dialysis (on an outpatient basis) now. The past few months have been the toughest I have ever experienced--both mentally and physically. I face Mortality (we're on a first name basis now as you can see)pretty much every day and that can do a number on ya mentally sometimes. But I have to say I'm handling it well. A Friend In Need Is A Friend Indeed has really been a life experience for me. You truly know who care about you when the toughest of times hit. Without both my family and good friends, going through all of this would have been way more difficult. And trust me, I hit some pretty crappy lows. Although, I can say that there are really only two people I can truly count on, and that's my parents. Most of the time I think both of them are crazy, but no matter what they'll walk on fire for me. With being in the hospital for a couple of months, moving and getting my apartment ready for the move-out, they were really the only ones I could count on. Many peeps crapped out of helping me with my move and with being sick, it's difficult doing it all on your own, but I got through it because of them. If I'm ever a parent, I hope I have the dedication they have.
I have an optimistic view of the future, but I still am a bit shaky. I never in my life have ever felt too weak to battle through things, except a month ago. The reality of dealing with a transplant and even the life-long ordeal of kidney failure is scary. And for a moment, I didn't think I could (or even wanted to)handle it all. And trust me, I've never been an advocate of suicide. But I think I'm okay with it all now. Because of the health channel, I'm mostly scared about the anesthesia...but if it's time for me to go, then it's time. Yes, I do believe greatly in Fate (we're on a first name basis now too).
So that's pretty much we're I'm at right now. I haven't really talked to most of you about what's goin--so here it is and I guess this was a sort of therapy session for myself.
Have a nice 4th.
"He had a theory, Walt, that the religious life, and all the agony that goes with it, is just something God sicks on people who have the gall to accuse Him of having created an ugly world."
Otherwise, life is okay right now. Things are finally calming down. I finished moving and cleaning my old apartment, and I think I'm getting use to dialysis (on an outpatient basis) now. The past few months have been the toughest I have ever experienced--both mentally and physically. I face Mortality (we're on a first name basis now as you can see)pretty much every day and that can do a number on ya mentally sometimes. But I have to say I'm handling it well. A Friend In Need Is A Friend Indeed has really been a life experience for me. You truly know who care about you when the toughest of times hit. Without both my family and good friends, going through all of this would have been way more difficult. And trust me, I hit some pretty crappy lows. Although, I can say that there are really only two people I can truly count on, and that's my parents. Most of the time I think both of them are crazy, but no matter what they'll walk on fire for me. With being in the hospital for a couple of months, moving and getting my apartment ready for the move-out, they were really the only ones I could count on. Many peeps crapped out of helping me with my move and with being sick, it's difficult doing it all on your own, but I got through it because of them. If I'm ever a parent, I hope I have the dedication they have.
I have an optimistic view of the future, but I still am a bit shaky. I never in my life have ever felt too weak to battle through things, except a month ago. The reality of dealing with a transplant and even the life-long ordeal of kidney failure is scary. And for a moment, I didn't think I could (or even wanted to)handle it all. And trust me, I've never been an advocate of suicide. But I think I'm okay with it all now. Because of the health channel, I'm mostly scared about the anesthesia...but if it's time for me to go, then it's time. Yes, I do believe greatly in Fate (we're on a first name basis now too).
So that's pretty much we're I'm at right now. I haven't really talked to most of you about what's goin--so here it is and I guess this was a sort of therapy session for myself.
Have a nice 4th.