Comments | carpe_ho_ras: [Open post.] Little boy blue and the man on the moon

justin_out in carpe_ho_ras

[Open post.] Little boy blue and the man on the moon

Aug 14, 2012 16:20

Justin is a mess. Watching Vivien die hit him hard. And he's feeling guilty as well, because those twins needed a caregiver and he didn't step up to the plate. He wasn't being entirely selfish though; being an only child with no experience with babies, he had no idea what to do with them, and there were far more qualified people to care for the ( Read more... )

echo (alchemaster's apprentice), zz:(dropped)vivien harmon, tom yarbro, grell sutcliffe, justin finch-fletchley, zz:(dropped)dean winchester, !open post, lystra, belize, zz:(dropped)hisoka kurosaki

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belize_queen August 21 2012, 04:00:04 UTC

My my my, what has Belize walked into! Or rather, walked away from! All this caregiving he's designed to dispense, and he wasn't around. He'll feel bad about that, when he realizes.

Hopefully he can take care of Justin, maybe.

If he lets him.

If Justin will accept that he's real.

Belize looked for him - half-heartedly, at first, then more intensely. He spent more time than was normal in the common spaces. Somehow, they did not cross paths til now.

Roles swapping.

When he sees Justin...

"... hey."

It's more subdued than is normal. He's a bit afraid he'll run away again.

justin_out August 21 2012, 20:29:42 UTC

Justin goes still, which is unusual considering he's most often in motion. But he quickly recovers and springs to his feet. "Quick, tell me where you live!" His hand as gone to his heart, as if its beating fast. "Once I realized -- well, I was foolish, wasn't I? I've looked and looked for you. I mean, once I realized you weren't a figment of my imagination. And I walked away from you like a --." He pauses to take a deep breath. "I actually considered knocking on every door in the place," he finally finishes, the confession a bit sheepish.

belize_queen August 26 2012, 16:22:14 UTC

There are moments like this one that can never be forgotten.

Those are the moments in which the gap between expectation and occurrence are so wide, that one can hardly encompass the difference between perception and reality.

Sometimes, they are expressed with just a word. A smile.

Sometimes, one dances or startles in awe.

And sometimes, one freezes - as though being immobile might somehow stop time.

Belize remains immobile only a moment, then he reaches for Justin's hand, squeezing. "I'm real," he starts, before he goes on to give Justin excruciatingly detailed directions.

Just in case they lose each other again.

justin_out August 31 2012, 00:59:02 UTC

Justin listens carefully and nods solemnly, committing Belize's directions to memory. He squeezes the other man's hand back tightly. "You're really beautiful, that's what you are," he whispers with a slight smile. And then he turns more serious, taking a deep breath.

"So, I've already made a horrible impression on you. Normally, I'm the life of the party, doll, honestly. But today? It's more of a pity party, so you probably want to kiss my cheek and bid me adieu for now." It's not what he wants, but its what he thinks is best. If he had his druthers, they'd go cuddle somewhere for the rest of the day, but the last thing he wants to do is turn the other bloke off with his angst.

belize_queen October 1 2012, 13:29:36 UTC

There's something that makes Belize want to rush and gather Justin in his arms - not the same something that makes him want to press him against a wall and cover his mouth in kisses, though it is a similar energy.

Yet the nurse can control his urges.

"I'll kiss your cheek," he says firmly, "but I'm not going anywhere."

And he does so, then, and by sheer base sneakiness, takes that opportunity to slip his arm around Justin's shoulder.

"What's up, precious?"

justin_out October 2 2012, 04:36:18 UTC

Justin melts a little, against the other man and inside as well. He'd given him an out, a chance to avoid this drama and he chose to stay. It was yeah, like melting. "That was smooth. Very. Impressive even," he murmurs, a soft tease in his voice that would be more forceful but for his sadness. He bumps against the nurse, and any other time it would be a playful, flirty move. Instead, it's just grateful for the arm around him.

"Oh, you know," he tries to begin. Because telling Belize is certainly not going to make any better impression, but he can't lie about it either. "The boy meets girl. Wants to braid her beautiful hair. Girl asks boy to be godfather to the twins she's carrying. Boy holds her hand during horrible labor, and --," his voice cracks then. It cracks so hard he feels it down deep.

belize_queen October 3 2012, 03:00:35 UTC

Oh dear, oh dear. Belize having been, in a past life, a nurse practicing in the infectious disease wing, he doesn't in fact have much obstetrics experience, beyond the internship he did, and a few replacements here and there, early on in his career.

Still, he can see where this is going.

He's already guessing.

And he finds this awful, awful, awful.

His hold on Justin might be a little bit more comforting, he presses a little bit closer.

"Go on," he murmurs, not because he needs to know, but because he is well aware that naming things makes them both more real... and more manageable.

justin_out October 31 2012, 00:27:52 UTC

"There was so much blood and I just -- I stayed in my room for days afterward. A week. More, maybe? I don't even know. She was so lovely, I mean, inside. She was quality, and her babes deserved her as their mother. And I didn't even ask who was watching those babies! I'm supposed to be their godfather, and I --," Justin can't continue because he's crying now. It's not particularly pretty for a bloke who prides himself on being pretty.

belize_queen October 31 2012, 22:28:41 UTC

Belize is just going to pull him into his arms, making gentle sounds. "It's alright," he says softly. "You don't have to justify your response to it, and you don't have to be invulnerable. It's alright."

He wants to know how the woman is now - but he's saving his questions for later.

justin_out November 3 2012, 05:29:24 UTC

Belize is a virtual stranger, despite the weird shared dream and his instantaneous attraction to him, but the comfort is still welcome and comforting. Justin practically clings to him, wrapping his arms around the other man and holding on tight. He doesn't reply because he feels as if Belize just gave him permission to mourn, and carry on, and he's going with it. He needs it.

belize_queen November 9 2012, 04:55:46 UTC

Belize isn't going to flinch from the clinging, he just stays there, comforting - his hands might rub Justin's shoulders. All this nearness is a bit troubling - but now's not the time, not with the other man so vulnerable and broken. (Now, Belize insists, that would just be creepy.)

He waits, then, until the crying's subsided.

justin_out November 11 2012, 22:29:51 UTC

Justin finally inhales deeply, becoming more aware of his surroundings and that he is, in fact, clinging and crying rather rudely to Belize. "Well, I just keep making bad impressions on you," he finally whispers, voice a bit raw with all the outpouring of emotion. "And these were very wet, sloppy impressions." He reaches out as if to straighten and smooth Belize's clothes, if typist allows. He has to admit, it felt good to get it all out.

belize_queen November 18 2012, 21:40:43 UTC

Yeah, there's definitely snot involved in this debacle. Good thing that Belize has had to deal with more disgusting bodily fluids than this in his career. So for now he's kind of ignoring it - but he'll be happy to, er, wipe up.

"Well, wet and sloppy's the stuff of life," he says soothingly, "just means you're human, sweetheart."

He'll wipe a tear off Justin's cheek, and give him a little smile intended to be reassuring. And then he's smoothing his hair again, because Justin seriously has great hair.

And he's been fantasizing about touching this guy ever since that weird dream.

justin_out November 19 2012, 07:26:50 UTC

Justin is incredibly happy he hasn't shaved his head lately because he could get used to having Belize's fingers in it. Truthfully he hasn't thought of it since Viv passed away in front of him. "Are you completely human?" he finds himself asking. He's met all manner of things here so it isn't that odd a question. "Or did you have magic? Because that dream with you felt so real..." He's staring at Belize rather intently. "You've got beautiful eyes, doll."

belize_queen November 26 2012, 03:06:04 UTC

D'aaaaaaaaw this is adorable. And Belize is blushing a little - is it getting hot in here, or what?

"Just a boy from Harlem, babe," he says, "nothing magic or what, well, you know," he winks, "unless you consider an ex-ex-ex-drag queen to be magic?"

Man.... he could get looked at and look back all day. Never mind the snot and the red eyes, this man is just plain gorgeous.

justin_out December 12 2012, 08:00:26 UTC

"I think that's magical, even if it wasn't what I meant at all," Justin smiles softly. "Something we have in common," he adds, rubbing his hands up and down Belize's arm, not even realizing. "I am though," he adds suddenly, in the interest of full disclosure. "Magical. Well, I'm a wizard, but only a little trained."

It's like he can't look away from Belize's face. He's enthralled.

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