(no subject)
Wow, what a day. I did a lot of thinking and contemplating about a lot of shit today. I had an overall good day on "the outside" at school and shit but I had a lot on my mind on "the inside"...then when it came to walking to my car, some comments were said by some people who chose to remain anonymous by ducking in their cars as they yelled immature things to me? Hmm...I tried to not let it bother me but I couldn't help but to get upset that I try so hard to be genuinely nice to people and that's how people treat me in return? It just really hurt...I hope it made their day better than mine.
So after school I did some minor errands then hung out with Sarah...a story within itself lmao, good times, nothing but good times.
Then I came back to my house with Sarah to spend some time with my favorite person, my 21 year old cousin Al. The three of us talked about a lot of funny shit. (ie: our opinions on Native American Socialism?) Sarah left then Al and I continued talking. He and I are so much a like it's insanely scary. We talked about everything from drugs to politics. He always has a way of making me feel better about the shit I constantly go through in life, cause he did the same shit, had the same hard-ass parents... The shit that no one sees but him, my family life, school, friends, high school, everyyything that pathetic people who are going no where in life think they know about me. "Fuck them" cause people who upset me in this bullshit we call highschool will fade out soon enough.
Do you ever get that feeling where you just want to cry?...cry over nothing specific but life in general. May I add that the pouring rain right now doesn't help subside that feeling... shit has been weighing me down that I force myself to forget about. The majority of this anxiety comes from the thought of where I could be a year from now, because I know it's very unlikely that I'll be in Dover :( Yay byebye Senior year, just what I had planned!
Well enough worrying, I need to get some sleep for the first time this week cause I have to work a funfilled 8 hours tomorrow. I'll post later this weekend. <3
miss you...
xo
CaC
So after school I did some minor errands then hung out with Sarah...a story within itself lmao, good times, nothing but good times.
Then I came back to my house with Sarah to spend some time with my favorite person, my 21 year old cousin Al. The three of us talked about a lot of funny shit. (ie: our opinions on Native American Socialism?) Sarah left then Al and I continued talking. He and I are so much a like it's insanely scary. We talked about everything from drugs to politics. He always has a way of making me feel better about the shit I constantly go through in life, cause he did the same shit, had the same hard-ass parents... The shit that no one sees but him, my family life, school, friends, high school, everyyything that pathetic people who are going no where in life think they know about me. "Fuck them" cause people who upset me in this bullshit we call highschool will fade out soon enough.
Do you ever get that feeling where you just want to cry?...cry over nothing specific but life in general. May I add that the pouring rain right now doesn't help subside that feeling... shit has been weighing me down that I force myself to forget about. The majority of this anxiety comes from the thought of where I could be a year from now, because I know it's very unlikely that I'll be in Dover :( Yay byebye Senior year, just what I had planned!
Well enough worrying, I need to get some sleep for the first time this week cause I have to work a funfilled 8 hours tomorrow. I'll post later this weekend. <3
miss you...
xo
CaC