Review: Al Gore's Dances with Smurfs
Well, maybe not. I didn't think Avatar was too bad. In fact, I quite liked it. It was pretty, mindless entertainment and it had dinosaurs. And I have a lot of difficulty hating a movie that has dinosaurs.
1. I really wish I hadn't watched this movie in 3D. It added nothing to the experience and made my eyes hurt a bit. Seriously, I know it's flashy and supposedly makes the experience more realistic, but whoever keeps saying "Yes, this movie should be in 3D" should really be shot. It was especially distracting in scenes that weren't rendered. Suddenly it's less "Ooh, pretty plants popping out of the screen" than "SWEET JESUS STEPHEN LANG GET OUT OF MY FACE." Even in rendered scenes, it was attention-grabbingly annoying.
2. So basically, this movie was a love letter to pre-colonial Africa IN SPACE. I guess you could get all up in arms and find ways that it was patronizing, but that's one of those things that if you'll look for it I'm sure you'll find it.
3. GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS. Hee! In other news, I thought the graphics in this movie were really stunning.
4. The plot was really formulaic, but what do you want from a popcorn movie? You knew he was going to get the giantest dinosaur horseybird of them all, defeat the bad guys, and stay with the tribe. Even so, they managed to make it interesting and if nothing else there were explosions.
5. SAM WORTHINGTON IS ACTING SO HARD HE CAN'T KEEP HIS ACCENT IN CHECK. It became especially obvious near the end.
6. Wow, a character who smokes who isn't the villain. Didn't affect much, but I heard somewhere that they were now giving an R to every movie which had a good guy who smoked. I guess this didn't go through? Also, the way she's wrapped up in leaves kind of made me laugh, since it seemed very out of place. At least Sam Worthington was covered in glowy things (in just the right places, of course) when he transferred over to the body of his Avatar.
7. Everything on this planet is trying to kill everything and is not afraid to do so. If it lives, the fauna of Pandora will want it dead. Seriously, I know the forest is the neural network of the entire planet (natural Internets!) but aren't there any herbivores?
8. Every time the corporate guy came onstage I had to keep myself from bursting into "Savages". And I couldn't help myself a few times.
...They're not like you and me, which means they must be EVIL!
1. I really wish I hadn't watched this movie in 3D. It added nothing to the experience and made my eyes hurt a bit. Seriously, I know it's flashy and supposedly makes the experience more realistic, but whoever keeps saying "Yes, this movie should be in 3D" should really be shot. It was especially distracting in scenes that weren't rendered. Suddenly it's less "Ooh, pretty plants popping out of the screen" than "SWEET JESUS STEPHEN LANG GET OUT OF MY FACE." Even in rendered scenes, it was attention-grabbingly annoying.
2. So basically, this movie was a love letter to pre-colonial Africa IN SPACE. I guess you could get all up in arms and find ways that it was patronizing, but that's one of those things that if you'll look for it I'm sure you'll find it.
3. GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS GIANT DINOSAUR HORSEYBIRDS. Hee! In other news, I thought the graphics in this movie were really stunning.
4. The plot was really formulaic, but what do you want from a popcorn movie? You knew he was going to get the giantest dinosaur horseybird of them all, defeat the bad guys, and stay with the tribe. Even so, they managed to make it interesting and if nothing else there were explosions.
5. SAM WORTHINGTON IS ACTING SO HARD HE CAN'T KEEP HIS ACCENT IN CHECK. It became especially obvious near the end.
6. Wow, a character who smokes who isn't the villain. Didn't affect much, but I heard somewhere that they were now giving an R to every movie which had a good guy who smoked. I guess this didn't go through? Also, the way she's wrapped up in leaves kind of made me laugh, since it seemed very out of place. At least Sam Worthington was covered in glowy things (in just the right places, of course) when he transferred over to the body of his Avatar.
7. Everything on this planet is trying to kill everything and is not afraid to do so. If it lives, the fauna of Pandora will want it dead. Seriously, I know the forest is the neural network of the entire planet (natural Internets!) but aren't there any herbivores?
8. Every time the corporate guy came onstage I had to keep myself from bursting into "Savages". And I couldn't help myself a few times.
...They're not like you and me, which means they must be EVIL!