Fic: When In Rome (DMOC, Josh/Cooper, NC17)
Title: When In Rome
Fandom: Dead Man On Campus
Pairing: Josh/Cooper
Rating: NC17
Summary: AU. Cooper and Nick take a little road trip over Christmas break and Josh deals with the consequences. Part Two of the Senior Year series.
Cooper could barely sit still long enough to scroll through the list of numbers programmed into his cell phone, but when he found the one he was looking for a fond smile lit up his features. He pressed ‘send’ and listened as the number dialed, holding his breath as he dug the fingers of his free hand into his thigh.
“Dude, what did I say?” Nick said from the driver’s seat, his eyebrows raised as Cooper glanced over at him. “I swear on my grandmother’s grave if you give yourself a heart attack I am not doing CPR.”
Cooper scowled and opened his mouth to say a few choice things about the reasons he didn’t want his cousin’s mouth anywhere near him no matter how close he was to death, but the line connecting on the other end of the phone interrupted him.
“Hello?”
“Josh,” Cooper said, grinning into the darkness of the car as the sound of his boyfriend’s voice filled his ear. “What are you doing?”
“Hey, Cooper,” Josh said, his tone instantly softening as he realized who was on the other end of the line. “Nothing, I was just watching TV. I was starting to fall asleep.”
“Kinda early to be going to bed,” Cooper said. “By yourself, anyway.”
He could almost hear Josh’s smile over the line as Nick slowed down and pulled to a stop in front of a small house. “I didn’t say I was in bed,” Josh answered. “I fell asleep on the couch watching some lame movie. What are you doing home on a Saturday night, anyway?”
“Who said I was home?” Cooper asked as he climbed out of the car and closed the door behind him. He joined Nick on the sidewalk, glancing up and down the dark street before he followed his cousin up the steps to the front door.
“Okay, I’ll bite. Where are you?” Josh asked.
“On my way to a friend’s house.”
“Sounds like fun,” Josh said, carefully keeping a sudden surge of jealousy out of his voice. He hated being jealous of Cooper’s friends, but the fact was that they got to see him and Josh hadn’t done more than listen to his voice over the phone since they said goodbye in the hotel lobby in New York. Not that he didn’t love listening to Cooper’s voice, but they still had so much more to learn about each other and Josh kept waiting for the day that Cooper decided he didn’t really want a long distance boyfriend after all.
“Fun’s definitely an understatement.” Cooper leaned against the porch railing and glanced over at his cousin, but Nick was already staring off down the street as he lit a cigarette and inhaled. “What are you doing tonight?”
“Nothing,” Josh admitted, stifling a sigh as he wondered what Cooper must think of him. Cooper and Nick went out practically every night; he was always calling right before he left to go out or right after he got home from some event that Josh really didn’t want to hear about. Meanwhile Josh spent most of his free time hanging out at home, trying not to wonder what Cooper was doing. Still, it beat hanging out with the guys from school and watching every single word that came out of his mouth for fear that one of them would guess what he was hiding. After he got back from New York he’d been so paranoid that people were going to be able to tell just by looking at him that he barely left the house except to go to school for almost two weeks.
“Where’s your mom?”
“She’s on nights again for awhile,” Josh answered. “She won’t be home until like 1:00. Why?”
“Just asking.” Cooper cleared his throat and glanced over at Nick, watching as his cousin finished his cigarette and flicked the remains off the porch and into the snow. Cooper glared at him but Nick just rolled his eyes and nodded impatiently in the direction of the door. “Listen, Josh, I gotta go. I’ll talk to you soon, okay?”
“Yeah, sure, Cooper. Bye.” Josh hung up the phone and shook his head, wondering why he was acting so cryptic about his plans for the evening. Usually he was more than happy to fill Josh in on whatever he and Nick were up to, regardless of whether or not it bothered Josh to hear about all the parties he went to or the people he met. Not that Josh had ever actually mentioned that it bothered him, he wasn’t sure he had the right to and even if he did he had no idea if it would matter to Cooper.
He jumped and looked up when the doorbell rang, crossing the small living room as he wondered who would be ringing his doorbell at 9:00 on a Saturday night. When he reached the door he turned the lock, bracing himself against the inevitable blast of late December air. As soon as he opened the door his jaw dropped, and he forgot all about the cold as first Cooper and then Nick stepped into his house. “Cooper? What are you doing here?”
“This,” Cooper answered as he pulled Josh forward and fused their lips together. Josh returned the kiss eagerly, oblivious to Nick’s presence or anything else that might distract him from the body pressed against his. He backed up, pulling Cooper along with him until he collided with the wall. He grunted against the force of the impact and wrapped his arms around Cooper’s waist, pressing their bodies as flush as he could as Cooper continued his assault on Josh’s mouth.
A low, steady murmur sounded from Cooper’s throat as he tore his lips away from Josh’s mouth to trail kisses down his neck. It took Josh a few minutes to realize that the vibrations were actually words, the sound muffled by his skin so he couldn’t make out what Cooper was saying. Finally he slid one hand onto the back of Cooper’s neck and pulled him away just enough to force Cooper to look up at him. “What?”
“I said,” Cooper began, pausing to plant a soft kiss on Josh’s lips, “that I missed you. I missed being able to touch you, I missed us.” He grinned and leaned forward again, kissing Josh more slowly this time. He didn’t care if Nick heard him, even though he knew he’d be stuck in a car with his cousin all the way back to New York. Nick could make fun of him and call him whipped all he wanted, as long as Cooper got to spend the next few days showing Josh exactly how much he missed him nothing Nick came up with would phase him.
When they came up for air again Josh was breathless, his mind racing as he tried to make sense of what was happening. He could barely get his mind around the fact that Cooper was actually in his house, let alone the fact that he’d just said that he missed Josh. The words made his heart skip a beat and he reached up to touch Cooper’s face, reassuring himself that the other boy was actually standing in front of him and he wasn’t having some crazy dream. “My…uh…my room’s up…upstairs,” he said, swallowing convulsively when Cooper turned his face into Josh’s hand and kissed his palm.
“Hey, France,” Nick called over his shoulder, reminding Josh that Cooper’s cousin was sitting in his living room flipping through the channels on the cable. He turned glazed eyes in the direction of the voice, not quite focusing on Nick.
“Yeah?”
“You got anything to eat? Fucking starving, Loverboy here was a total asshole about stopping.”
Josh chuckled and glanced at Cooper again, but Cooper was too busy working Josh’s tee shirt up over his chest to worry about the conversation. “There’s…uh…there’s…” He trailed off as Cooper’s mouth landed on his chest, latching onto a nipple. “Fuck…in the fridge, whatever you want,” he finally managed to choke out. “My mom left something…f-for dinner.”
“He’ll be fine,” Cooper snarled as he straightened up and yanked Josh’s shirt over his head, taking hold of Josh’s hips and backing him toward the stairs. “We need way more naked right now.”
Josh nodded and somehow managed to get his legs to carry him up the stairs, only vaguely registering Nick’s parting shot about certain visuals ruining his appetite anyway. He pulled Cooper behind him into his bedroom, pausing long enough to shut the door before he found himself being pushed down onto the bed. A second later Cooper was on top of him, his hands fumbling with the zipper on Josh’s jeans as Josh pulled him down for another desperate kiss. They were both in a hurry and it was going to be over way too fast, but almost three months of anticipation and the sudden rush of having Cooper standing in his doorway was too much for Josh.
He lifted his hips off the bed long enough for Cooper to yank the rest of his clothes off, groaning as his steadily growing erection made contact with Cooper’s still denim-clad groin. His hands slid under Cooper’s shirt to urge it over his chest, forcing Cooper to pull away long enough to pull it over his head and toss it on the floor. Once his shirt was taken care of Cooper paused, digging in the pocket of his jeans with fingers made clumsy with impatience. Finally he retrieved a condom and a tube of lube, tossing both on the mattress next to Josh before he reached for the waistband of his jeans.
Josh swallowed hard as he watched Cooper push his jeans and boxers down his thighs, kicking off his shoes before he peeled off the rest of his clothes and tossed them on the floor. He wasn’t sure whether to be flattered or worried by Cooper’s urgency; part of him was in just as big a hurry to renew their connection, but he couldn’t quite ignore the nervous tension tempering the growing need in the pit of his stomach. There was no reason to be nervous, he knew Cooper and it wasn’t like they hadn’t been in contact since the last time they were together. Still, phone calls were one thing, having Cooper actually in his bedroom was completely different.
“Josh?” Cooper slid down on the mattress next to Josh, sliding one arm around his waist and turning Josh gently toward him. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” Josh answered, his face flushing as he realized he wasn’t doing a very good job of keeping his anxiousness to himself. He hadn’t intended to kill the mood, but now that Cooper was looking at him with that concerned expression he was even more nervous. “I just didn’t expect you, that’s all. I can’t believe you’re actually here.”
Cooper groaned and closed his eyes, and Josh’s heart plummeted into the pit of his stomach. Everything in him was still aching for Cooper’s touch, but somehow he’d managed to say exactly the wrong thing and now everything was ruined. He started to pull away but as soon as he moved Cooper’s eyes opened again, and Josh froze as he registered his own misery mirrored back in Cooper’s expression. “And the first thing I do when I walk in the door is jump you. God, I’m such an asshole. I think not having sex for three months is making me crazy, because all I’ve thought about since October is the next time I get to touch you.”
“That’s pretty much all I’ve been thinking about too,” Josh admitted, a flood of relief hitting him when Cooper mentioned that he hadn’t had sex since the last time they were together. It was true that Josh had spent a lot of time thinking about the next time he and Cooper would be together, but he’d spent at least as much time wondering if there would be a next time. Most of Cooper’s phone calls consisted of telling Josh where he was going and who was going to be there, and he couldn’t help wondering if Cooper thought of them as exclusive or if Josh was just a passing interest for him. Not that he could really blame Cooper if he got bored and moved on, it wasn’t like they could just get together whenever they felt like it.
“It’s stupid,” Josh added, suddenly embarrassed that they were even having this conversation. “It’s just weird that you’re actually in my house, you know? I mean I’m glad you’re here, don’t get me wrong.”
Cooper grinned and trailed one hand up Josh’s back to rest against his neck, slowly drawing Josh toward him until they were nose to nose. “I’m glad I’m here too,” he said just before he leaned forward a final inch and fused their mouths together again.
Josh groaned into Cooper’s mouth and pressed their hips together, swallowing a sob at the almost painful contact. Cooper was right, it had been way too long since they got a chance to do this. He knew how much he’d missed Cooper; it seemed crazy when they hardly even knew each other but that didn’t stop him from thinking about it pretty much every waking moment of the day. They rocked together as they kissed, legs hopelessly tangled and erections sliding more or less awkwardly together. Josh wouldn’t have been able to voice what he needed if he wanted to, all he knew was that he needed more. He thrust harder against Cooper, evoking a tortured groan from the body plastered against him.
As soon as Cooper reached between them and closed his hand around both of them Josh knew what it was he’d been looking for, and he thrust hard into the vice grip pressing their erections together and moaned his release into Cooper’s mouth. Cooper kept up a steady rhythm as Josh shuddered against him, releasing Josh’s mouth to suck hard on his neck. When the last spasm of pleasure subsided Cooper let Josh slip out of his grasp, wrapping a slick hand around his own aching cock and stroking as fast as he could. A few more thrusts was all it took, blunt teeth pressing into Josh’s skin as Cooper lost control.
When he finally stopped shaking Cooper collapsed back onto the mattress, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. He felt something warm and wet on his neck and forced his eyes open just in time to watch Josh slide down his chest, licking Cooper’s skin clean as he made his way to his stomach. Cooper lifted one boneless arm to run his fingers through Josh’s hair, silently encouraging him as the other boy reached his destination and tentatively ran his tongue up Cooper’s length. He sucked in a sharp breath as his spent cock twitched in response, his eyes rolling back as Josh closed his mouth around the tip and slid as far down Cooper’s length as he could.
He was surprised to find himself getting hard again already, but almost three months with nothing but his hand for company and twelve hours of anticipation during the drive to Indiana had definitely taken their toll. Not to mention the fact that this was the first time Josh had ever used that amazing mouth for something other than kissing, and he wasn’t about to let an opportunity like this pass him by. All the way from Buffalo all he’d been able to think about was burying himself as deep inside Josh as possible, but the minute he stopped long enough to see how nervous Josh was at his unexpected visit he’d resigned himself to a quick hand job and a little more patience. This still wasn’t quite the same as actually being inside Josh, but it was mind-blowing nevertheless.
It took him longer to come the second time but Josh seemed up to the challenge, sucking enthusiastically if not as skillfully as Cooper had ever experienced. The thought that this was the first time Josh had ever done this sent a rush of propriety through Cooper and he opened his eyes, groaning as he watched Josh’s lips sliding up and down his shaft. As soon as Josh looked up and their eyes met Cooper lost it, his second orgasm taking him by surprise. Josh gagged a little and pulled back, swallowing around Cooper’s length before he pulled away completely and collapsed against the mattress again.
If Cooper could have moved he probably would have returned the favor, but his entire body felt paralyzed. He shivered with each aftershock of pleasure, his eyes wide and unfocused as he waited for his body to work again. Not that he’d mind just lying there next to Josh for the rest of his life, he could think of much worse ways to die.
“Cooper?”
“Yeah?” he managed to say, the sound of his own voice foreign to him in the stillness of the room.
The body next to him shifted and he looked over to find Josh staring down at him, his head propped up on one elbow and his other hand hovering over Cooper’s chest for one uncertain moment before Cooper finally reached up and closed his own hand around it. He entwined their fingers together and pressed both hands to his chest, not even sure how he’d summoned that much energy except that he hated to see Josh looking so anxious.
“How long can you stay?” Josh finally asked.
“Nick’s mom made us promise to be back by Friday,” Cooper answered, sighing at the thought of leaving so soon after he’d gotten there. “The whole family gets together for a huge New Year’s Eve thing every year, if Nick misses it because of me I’ll probably be grounded until college. So we’ve gotta be on the road sometime on Thursday.”
Four days. It wasn’t as long as Josh had hoped, but it was more time than they’d had together so far. It was strange to think that they’d really only spent two days together, especially considering how much Cooper knew about him. The truth was that Cooper probably knew Josh better than anyone in his life, mainly because he was the only person Josh could be completely honest with. Cooper’s life was a lot different than his, though; he lived by a different set of rules, and as far as Josh knew he didn’t have to hide who he was from the people around him.
Thinking about Cooper’s life back in Buffalo always made Josh wonder why Cooper bothered with him, but so far the only explanation he’d been able to come up with was that Cooper was still charmed by Josh’s relative innocence. He tried not to think about it too much, though, because whenever he did he started wondering how much longer he had before Cooper got bored and moved on.
“Hey,” Cooper said, tugging on the hand still gripped firmly in his. “Is it okay that we just showed up? Maybe I should have called, but I wanted to surprise you.”
“No, I mean it’s fine, I’m glad you’re here,” Josh said too quickly, panic setting in at the thought of Cooper getting up and leaving already. “I was just thinking about how four days is the longest we’ll have spent together so far.”
“Pretty weird, huh?” Cooper laughed and let go of Josh’s hand, rolling onto his side to face the other boy. “Do you think your mom will mind if we crash here tonight? We could go get a room if it’s gonna freak her out to come home and find Nick on the couch. Or I could send him to a hotel, he’ll give me shit about making him go alone but I’d rather stay here. If it’s okay.”
Josh smiled shyly, his heart skipping a beat at the thought of spending the night in Cooper’s arms. It was amazing how much he’d missed even that since he left New York; he’d only had two nights to get used to it but after almost three months he still remembered what it felt like to have Cooper’s arms around him every time he closed his eyes at night. “It’s fine, I’ll just call her and tell her so she doesn’t call the cops or something.” He stretched and pushed himself into a sitting position, shivering as the cold air hit his bare skin. “Are you hungry?”
“Starving,” Cooper admitted as he pushed himself off the mattress and dug through the pile of clothes on the floor for his boxers. “Nick’s right, I was a total asshole about stopping. Longest twelve hours of my life.”
Josh laughed as he pulled his boxers back on and grabbed his jeans and a new tee shirt. “You know, maybe I’m glad I didn’t know you were coming after all. I would have been driving myself crazy waiting for you to show up.” He turned back to Cooper and grabbed the front of the shirt he’d just pulled back on, hauling the other boy toward him for a hard kiss. “I gotta go clean up, I’ll be down in a few minutes.”
Cooper nodded and kissed him again, reluctantly letting Josh pull out of his reach when they finally broke apart. He stood in the center of the bedroom for a long time after Josh headed for the bathroom, his heart pounding against his rib cage as it finally sank in that he was actually there. When he heard the shower start he shook his head and forced himself to go back downstairs, knowing that if he stood there any longer he was going to end up in the shower with Josh.
~
Josh turned off the shower and shook the water out of his hair, reaching for a towel and closing his eyes as he dried himself off. He still couldn’t believe that Cooper was actually in Indiana, let alone in his house eating his mother’s food. He got dressed slowly, suddenly nervous about going downstairs and facing the two boys watching TV in his living room. It was one thing seeing Cooper again; he at least wanted to be there. Nick, however, was a different story entirely, and Josh was starting to wonder if Cooper ever went anywhere without his cousin.
It wasn’t like Cooper had never threatened to just show up at his door, but Josh had never taken him seriously. He’d figured it was too far, that his parents would never go for Cooper driving twelve hours to southern Indiana to see some guy they’d never heard of. He wondered suddenly if Cooper had told his parents about Josh, if anyone knew about him. Josh had mentioned making a couple friends at the Mock United Nations when his mother asked, but he’d never told her much more than Cooper’s name. He hadn’t mentioned him to any of his friends at school; he’d wanted to believe it was so he wouldn’t have to lie about what Cooper meant to him, but deep down he knew it was because he was afraid the minute he started talking about Cooper they’d all be able to tell.
As much as that thought worried him it didn’t bother him half as much as the force of his own feelings, because the second Cooper smiled at him and pulled him forward into a kiss it all came rushing right back. He’d hoped that having a couple months to get over that first rush of infatuation would make it easier if he ever did see Cooper again, but he was as nervous now as he had been that first day in New York. He stared critically at his reflection in the mirror, fingering the fresh bruise forming on his neck as he realized that anyone that saw him with Cooper was probably going to know.
He took a deep breath and forced himself to go back downstairs, steeling himself against whatever insult Nick would most likely hurl at him the minute he walked into the living room. So he was shocked when Nick looked up from the plate of food on his lap and actually smiled almost pleasantly, and he stopped just short of pinching himself to make sure he really was awake.
“Hey, France. This is great chicken, even for a non-Italian. Props to your mom.”
“Uh…thanks. I’ll tell her you liked it,” Josh said, his forehead furrowed as he sank into a chair next to the couch. “Where’s Cooper?”
“Kitchen,” Nick answered without looking up. “It’s cool of you to let us crash here tonight. Sure your mom’s not gonna flip?”
Josh shook his head and reached for the phone, dialing the number of the hospital where his mother worked. “No, she won’t care as long as we don’t wake her up in the morning,” he said as he listened to the phone ring. “She’s on nights, she won’t be back until after 1:00.”
He listened to the recording at the other end of the line and then punched in the extension that would connect him to the floor his mother worked on, glancing over his shoulder as the door to the kitchen swung open behind him. His heart skipped a beat as Cooper grinned at him and threw himself down on the couch next to Nick, watching Josh out of the corner of his eye as he finally got a person on the phone and asked to speak to his mother.
“Hey, Mom,” Josh said, biting his bottom lip nervously as he stared at the floor. “You remember that guy I told you I met in New York? Well he and his cousin dropped by. Yes. Just for a couple days…yes, their parents know where they are. Mom, I just called to tell you that Nick’s going to sleep on the couch tonight, so don’t call the cops or anything when you come in and find him there. Okay. Alright. Bye, Mom.”
He rolled his eyes and hung up the phone, not daring to look over at Cooper and Nick. He knew they were just waiting for him to look up so they could make some crack about how cute it was that his mom asked about their parents or make fun of him for needing to ask her permission to let them stay. He had no idea what their families were like, but he got the feeling things at their houses were a lot different than what passed for normal in Sandborn.
“You told your mom about me?”
Josh looked up sharply, forgetting his humiliation that they’d heard him talking to his mother when he caught the amused and slightly awed look on Cooper’s face. He swallowed hard as he realized what Cooper thought he’d told his mother, a hot blush creeping into his cheeks. “I just told her we hung out, she doesn’t know…” He trailed off and glanced over at Nick, clearing his throat and shifting uncomfortably in his chair.
“Oh.” Cooper’s smile faltered for a second before he caught himself and forced himself to brighten again. “You sure we should stay tonight?”
Josh’s gaze shifted to Cooper just in time to see his smile waver, and he frowned as he wondered why Cooper would care what he’d told his mother. He’d expected at least Nick to make fun of him, but so far Nick hadn’t even looked at him and Cooper looked almost disappointed.
“Give him a break, man,” Nick said suddenly, surprising Josh into looking over at him. The blonde stood up without looking at Josh, reaching in his coat pocket for his cigarettes. “He said it was cool if we stayed here. You’re lucky he didn’t slam the door in your face for not calling first. I told you to call.”
Nick turned toward the front door and let himself out onto the porch, a cigarette hanging from his lips as he reached for his lighter with one hand and closed the door behind him with the other. As soon as the door clicked shut Josh snapped his jaw closed, his mind reeling as he wondered if he’d just imagined the last two minutes of his life. First Cooper looked practically giddy at the thought that Josh might have come out to his mom, and then Nick defended him when he admitted he hadn’t done it. Something was definitely weird here; maybe he’d slipped on the ice on the way home and he was in a coma, or maybe he’d gotten food poisoning from the questionable pizza he’d eaten at lunchtime and now he was delirious. Either way he had to be imagining things, because he couldn’t handle it if any of this was real.
He stood up and picked up Nick’s empty plate, carefully avoiding Cooper’s gaze as he crossed to the kitchen and pushed the door open. When he was alone again he let out a deep breath and set the plate in the sink, turning on the water and watching it run down the drain. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been standing there when the kitchen door opened again, but a minute later Cooper set his own plate down in the sink and shut the water off. Josh stifled a sigh as Cooper’s arms slid around his waist, and he turned to look into brown eyes full of questions he wasn’t sure he wanted to answer.
“I thought he hated me,” Josh said, glancing over Cooper’s shoulder in the direction of the front porch.
Cooper laughed and pulled Josh a little closer, his fingers trailing through the other boy’s hair to land at the back of his neck. “Nah, he doesn’t mean 80 percent of what he says. And anyway he doesn’t like anyone at first, but after awhile you start to grow on him. Besides, who cares what he thinks. I like you.”
Josh relaxed marginally as a nervous grin tugged at the corners of his mouth, his arms circling Cooper’s back as he felt himself being pulled forward for a lingering kiss. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to kissing Cooper; the mere fact that he could do it was mind-blowing enough, but the knowledge that Cooper still wanted him after more than two months apart was what kept threatening to bring him to his knees. He’d expected winter break to be just two boring weeks away from school, most of it spent staring at his ceiling and wondering what Cooper was doing. Never in a million years would he have guessed that Cooper would be standing in his kitchen two days after Christmas, trailing kisses down his neck to suck on the side he hadn’t already marked.
He chuckled low in his throat as his fingers stroked Cooper’s hair, craning his neck a little to give the other boy better access. “At least it’s cold enough to wear turtlenecks now.”
“No way,” Cooper said, pulling back to look up at Josh. “Not while I’m here.” He frowned and looked down at Josh’s neck, trailing his fingers across first the fresh mark and then its twin on the other side of Josh’s neck. “Josh…God, just…not while I’m here, okay?”
Josh swallowed convulsively, somehow wrestling his motor skills into submission long enough to nod. He knew he was going to be answering a lot of uncomfortable questions from not only his mother but probably kids from school if they ran into anyone he knew while Cooper was in town, but the way Cooper looked at him when he said not while I’m here made it worth it. Suddenly four days seemed like a long time, long enough to drag Josh out of the closet whether either of them intended for it to happen or not. He took a deep breath and reached for Cooper’s hand, pulling him out of the kitchen and past the couch where Nick was once again channel surfing.
“There’s a pillow and some blankets in the hall closet,” he said, pausing long enough to look down at Nick. “The couch folds out.”
They didn’t wait for an answer, in fact by the time Josh was done talking they were already halfway to the stairs. He let Cooper pull him up to the second floor and into his bedroom before he pulled his hand out of the other boy’s, closing the door before he pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor. Cooper’s own shirt hit the floor a moment later, followed by the jeans he’d pulled back on long enough to go downstairs and eat. He sat on the edge of the bed and watched as Josh mirrored his actions, reaching for the zipper of his jeans and sliding them to the floor.
Cooper leaned back and watched as Josh crossed the small room and knelt on the end of the mattress, his fingers splayed invitingly across his thighs as he waited for Cooper to make some kind of move. Cooper smiled and turned so he was facing Josh, taking the time to admire the angles of Josh’s shoulders and the red marks on either side of his neck. He knew he couldn’t explain to Josh why it mattered to him whether Josh covered them or not, he’d never been that good with words and he’d never be able to make Josh understand.
Maybe it wasn’t fair to ask Josh to walk around with the evidence of their relationship right there where everyone could see it, but he hated having to pretend they were just friends in public. He knew when he talked Nick into driving to Indiana that he wasn’t going to be able to touch Josh when they went out, that he couldn’t hold his hand or just kiss him in front of people that knew him. He couldn’t even tell Josh how beautiful he was or what it did to him to see that expanse of pale skin that he’d been dreaming about for the past three months. Finally he leaned forward, hoping to convey everything he couldn’t say with a single kiss.
Josh sighed into the kiss and pulled Cooper instinctively closer, his head spinning from the combination of the kiss and the knowledge that it mattered to Cooper that everyone Josh knew saw the marks on his neck. He knew from their first two days together that Cooper had a tendency to get a little carried away in that respect, but he’d managed to keep the last round of hickeys covered pretty well when he got back to Indiana. Still, it was kind of nice to see the reminder of his first time with Cooper on his skin for days after he got home. The knowledge that Cooper wanted people to know about them - that he wanted to drag Josh as far out of the closet as Josh would let him - was more than Josh had let himself hope for.
He’d thought about just coming out and dealing with the consequences more than once in the past, and after he met Cooper the urge to just get it over with was even stronger. Every time he got close something would happen, though, someone would make a joke or even just look at him funny and ask him what was wrong and he’d slam the door shut on his secret again. When he was with Cooper it seemed so easy, as though everyone should know the truth. He wanted to be able to tell his friends and his mom how happy he was whenever he was with Cooper, or even when he called just to ask what Josh was doing.
Slowly Cooper sank back onto the mattress, one hand behind Josh’s neck to pull the other boy on top of him without breaking the kiss. Josh’s stomach flipped as he settled between Cooper’s legs and a hand slid under the waistband of his boxers, instinctively grinding his hips into Cooper’s as his mouth left the other boy’s to trail down his neck. When he reached Cooper’s collarbone he latched on and sucked gently, his hips moving rhythmically as he left his own mark on Cooper’s skin.
Cooper groaned and fumbled in the sheets for the tube he’d dropped earlier, arching his back into Josh as he finally closed his hand around it. He got the top off and squeezed some lube onto his fingers, letting it warm up a little before he slid his hand under the waistband of Josh’s boxers and ghosted slick fingers over his opening. Josh gasped and thrust down to try to draw the teasing fingers inside him, but as soon as Cooper’s hand appeared it was gone. Before he had a chance to react he felt his boxers sliding down his hips, and he lifted himself up long enough to help Cooper wrestle them off before he rolled over onto his stomach.
He heard a sharp intake of breath and he looked over at Cooper in time to watch him peel off his own boxers. A hand trailed down his back to rest on his hip, urging him back onto his side. Cooper fused their lips together again and pulled Josh’s leg up over his hip before his hand dipped lower, one slick finger circling Josh’s entrance before it slid slowly inside. A low groan escaped Josh’s throat as he thrust back, ignoring the slight discomfort as he tried to get Cooper as far inside him as he could. This was what he’d been thinking about for the past three months, dreaming about it and fantasizing at the worst possible times.
All he had to do was picture Cooper and he remembered exactly what it felt like to be with him, and more often than not he’d end up hard and frustrated in the middle of class. He was still self-conscious about the fact that he was so much less experienced than Cooper, but when they were together it didn’t matter as much anymore. The combined sensations of Cooper’s mouth moving against his and Cooper’s finger stretching him threatened to fry what was left of his senses, and when he felt a second finger join the first he gasped and tore his lips away from Cooper’s.
“Josh? You wanna stop?” Cooper asked, stilling against the other boy as he watched Josh’s eyes fly open.
“No. God no,” Josh managed to gasp. “I just…I didn’t even know how much I missed you.”
Cooper smiled and leaned forward to press his lips to Josh’s again, pulling his hand away from Josh’s body long enough to fumble for the lube. He slipped the condom on with shaking fingers and quickly coated it with lube, his heart pounding against his ribcage the entire time. He’d spent so much time thinking about this moment that he wasn’t sure how long he’d last, but he needed to be inside Josh again. For the past three months he’d tried to convince himself that he’d imagined the connection between them, that he’d just developed an infatuation for a cute guy he didn’t really know. That had to be it, he’d remembered this amazing connection between them because they’d only had two days and he’d wished it was more.
He took hold of Josh’s hip and pushed him back onto his stomach, swallowing as Josh pushed himself up onto his knees and spread his legs apart. One hand landed on Josh’s hip to hold him steady as he sank slowly into velvet heat, closing his eyes and clenching his teeth as he struggled to keep himself from thrusting before Josh was ready. He ran a soothing hand over Josh’s back as he listened to the other boy’s breathing change, then slowly Josh relaxed and pushed back until Cooper was buried as deep as he could go. Cooper bit back a gasp as the feeling of completeness threatened to overwhelm him; he hadn’t been with that many people, but no one he’d ever been with had felt this right. It felt almost like he and Josh had known each other their whole lives, as though they’d been doing this for years.
Slowly he pulled out, struggling not to react to the loss of their connection before he plunged back in again. Josh groaned and thrust back to meet him, his whole body shaking as Cooper scraped over his prostate. Maybe it was crazy, he’d listened to Nick tell him for almost three months that it was crazy to think about Josh all the time when they didn’t even really know each other. He couldn’t help it, though, and he didn’t want to because when they were together nothing else mattered. Not their families, not what the world thought of them - all that mattered was that they were together, and Cooper wanted Josh more than he’d ever wanted anyone.
They rocked together in a steady rhythm, Josh shuddering and moaning low in his throat every time Cooper angled for his prostate. With every thrust Josh shook a little more, until finally Cooper pulled them both back onto his knees, wrapping his arms around Josh’s waist as Josh leaned back against his chest. His thrusts had less force in that position, but he didn’t want it to end too soon. He pressed his lips to Josh’s shoulder and closed one hand around the other boy’s length, stroking in time to each sharp thrust.
Josh rocked helplessly between Cooper’s hand and his lap, his lips parted and his breath coming in short gasps. He wasn’t even sure where he was anymore, all he knew was the amazing pleasure centered in the pit of his stomach. Then Cooper’s strokes got a little faster and his mouth opened on Josh’s shoulder, and Josh lost control and came with a gasp. He clamped down hard on Cooper, shuddering as each wave of pleasure wracked his body. He was vaguely aware of Cooper moaning his own release into Josh’s shoulder, blunt teeth scraping his skin as Cooper thrust deep and followed him over the edge.
Harsh panting was the only sound in the room as Josh slid off Cooper’s lap and collapsed on the mattress, forcing one eye open to watch Cooper drag himself off the bed long enough to dispose of the condom. When he felt Cooper’s weight hit the mattress again he groaned and forced his body to work with him long enough to move over, sighing at the welcome weight of Cooper’s body settling against him in the small bed. He knew he should insist that they both get dressed again, or at the very least put their boxers back on. He couldn’t bring himself to ask Cooper to do it, though, even though it meant risking his mother finding them tangled together in his narrow bed.
“Josh?” Cooper’s breath warmed his cheek as he spoke, and Josh turned his head slightly to nuzzle Cooper’s hair.
“Yeah?”
He heard the rustling of sheets as Cooper pushed himself up on the pillow to look down at him, one hand landing on Josh’s cheek to stroke his skin. “What do you think would happen if you told your mom about us? I mean if you came out to her. What do you think she'd say?”
Josh could hear the hesitation in Cooper’s voice, and he forced his eyes open to look up at the other boy. He wasn’t sure why it mattered so much to Cooper whether his mom knew about them or not, but obviously it bothered him since he’d brought it up twice on his first night in town. “I don’t know,” he answered, figuring honesty was all he could offer. “I mean sometimes I wonder if she knows already. It’s not like I date that much, she’s gotta figure something’s up. But even if she was okay with it I don’t think she’d be that cool about us having sex under her roof.”
“So you date girls,” Cooper said, it wasn’t supposed to sound like an accusation but Josh couldn’t help flinching as he watched jealousy flash in Cooper’s eyes.
“Well, yeah, I mean I did.” Josh paused and pushed himself up onto an elbow to face Cooper. “After everybody stopped going to school dances and stuff as a group it just sort of happened. That’s when I first started to realize I wasn’t that interested in girls. I mean I haven’t gone out with anybody since…I wouldn’t do that.”
The raw vulnerability in Josh’s eyes made Cooper’s stomach twist, and he instantly regretted bringing up any subject that made Josh look that guilty. It wasn’t his fault Cooper didn’t understand how his life worked, it was one thing to hear about this stuff on the news but Cooper had never really dealt with it. His own parents more or less ignored his lifestyle, and the rest of his family was supportive, albeit sometimes grudgingly. Besides, he had Nick to watch his back, Josh didn’t have anybody.
“Me either,” he finally said, pulling Josh back down onto the pillow with him and sliding one arm around the other boy’s waist. “I wasn’t sure I could do this whole long distance thing, you know? But it’s worth it.”
Josh smiled into Cooper’s shoulder and closed his eyes again, focusing on the warmth radiating from Cooper’s skin and the way he felt pressed close to Josh. “So did you tell your parents about me?”
Cooper chuckled softly and tightened his grip on Josh’s waist, leaning forward to plant a soft kiss on his lips before he closed his eyes again. “Yeah, Josh. I tell everybody about you.”
Fandom: Dead Man On Campus
Pairing: Josh/Cooper
Rating: NC17
Summary: AU. Cooper and Nick take a little road trip over Christmas break and Josh deals with the consequences. Part Two of the Senior Year series.
Cooper could barely sit still long enough to scroll through the list of numbers programmed into his cell phone, but when he found the one he was looking for a fond smile lit up his features. He pressed ‘send’ and listened as the number dialed, holding his breath as he dug the fingers of his free hand into his thigh.
“Dude, what did I say?” Nick said from the driver’s seat, his eyebrows raised as Cooper glanced over at him. “I swear on my grandmother’s grave if you give yourself a heart attack I am not doing CPR.”
Cooper scowled and opened his mouth to say a few choice things about the reasons he didn’t want his cousin’s mouth anywhere near him no matter how close he was to death, but the line connecting on the other end of the phone interrupted him.
“Hello?”
“Josh,” Cooper said, grinning into the darkness of the car as the sound of his boyfriend’s voice filled his ear. “What are you doing?”
“Hey, Cooper,” Josh said, his tone instantly softening as he realized who was on the other end of the line. “Nothing, I was just watching TV. I was starting to fall asleep.”
“Kinda early to be going to bed,” Cooper said. “By yourself, anyway.”
He could almost hear Josh’s smile over the line as Nick slowed down and pulled to a stop in front of a small house. “I didn’t say I was in bed,” Josh answered. “I fell asleep on the couch watching some lame movie. What are you doing home on a Saturday night, anyway?”
“Who said I was home?” Cooper asked as he climbed out of the car and closed the door behind him. He joined Nick on the sidewalk, glancing up and down the dark street before he followed his cousin up the steps to the front door.
“Okay, I’ll bite. Where are you?” Josh asked.
“On my way to a friend’s house.”
“Sounds like fun,” Josh said, carefully keeping a sudden surge of jealousy out of his voice. He hated being jealous of Cooper’s friends, but the fact was that they got to see him and Josh hadn’t done more than listen to his voice over the phone since they said goodbye in the hotel lobby in New York. Not that he didn’t love listening to Cooper’s voice, but they still had so much more to learn about each other and Josh kept waiting for the day that Cooper decided he didn’t really want a long distance boyfriend after all.
“Fun’s definitely an understatement.” Cooper leaned against the porch railing and glanced over at his cousin, but Nick was already staring off down the street as he lit a cigarette and inhaled. “What are you doing tonight?”
“Nothing,” Josh admitted, stifling a sigh as he wondered what Cooper must think of him. Cooper and Nick went out practically every night; he was always calling right before he left to go out or right after he got home from some event that Josh really didn’t want to hear about. Meanwhile Josh spent most of his free time hanging out at home, trying not to wonder what Cooper was doing. Still, it beat hanging out with the guys from school and watching every single word that came out of his mouth for fear that one of them would guess what he was hiding. After he got back from New York he’d been so paranoid that people were going to be able to tell just by looking at him that he barely left the house except to go to school for almost two weeks.
“Where’s your mom?”
“She’s on nights again for awhile,” Josh answered. “She won’t be home until like 1:00. Why?”
“Just asking.” Cooper cleared his throat and glanced over at Nick, watching as his cousin finished his cigarette and flicked the remains off the porch and into the snow. Cooper glared at him but Nick just rolled his eyes and nodded impatiently in the direction of the door. “Listen, Josh, I gotta go. I’ll talk to you soon, okay?”
“Yeah, sure, Cooper. Bye.” Josh hung up the phone and shook his head, wondering why he was acting so cryptic about his plans for the evening. Usually he was more than happy to fill Josh in on whatever he and Nick were up to, regardless of whether or not it bothered Josh to hear about all the parties he went to or the people he met. Not that Josh had ever actually mentioned that it bothered him, he wasn’t sure he had the right to and even if he did he had no idea if it would matter to Cooper.
He jumped and looked up when the doorbell rang, crossing the small living room as he wondered who would be ringing his doorbell at 9:00 on a Saturday night. When he reached the door he turned the lock, bracing himself against the inevitable blast of late December air. As soon as he opened the door his jaw dropped, and he forgot all about the cold as first Cooper and then Nick stepped into his house. “Cooper? What are you doing here?”
“This,” Cooper answered as he pulled Josh forward and fused their lips together. Josh returned the kiss eagerly, oblivious to Nick’s presence or anything else that might distract him from the body pressed against his. He backed up, pulling Cooper along with him until he collided with the wall. He grunted against the force of the impact and wrapped his arms around Cooper’s waist, pressing their bodies as flush as he could as Cooper continued his assault on Josh’s mouth.
A low, steady murmur sounded from Cooper’s throat as he tore his lips away from Josh’s mouth to trail kisses down his neck. It took Josh a few minutes to realize that the vibrations were actually words, the sound muffled by his skin so he couldn’t make out what Cooper was saying. Finally he slid one hand onto the back of Cooper’s neck and pulled him away just enough to force Cooper to look up at him. “What?”
“I said,” Cooper began, pausing to plant a soft kiss on Josh’s lips, “that I missed you. I missed being able to touch you, I missed us.” He grinned and leaned forward again, kissing Josh more slowly this time. He didn’t care if Nick heard him, even though he knew he’d be stuck in a car with his cousin all the way back to New York. Nick could make fun of him and call him whipped all he wanted, as long as Cooper got to spend the next few days showing Josh exactly how much he missed him nothing Nick came up with would phase him.
When they came up for air again Josh was breathless, his mind racing as he tried to make sense of what was happening. He could barely get his mind around the fact that Cooper was actually in his house, let alone the fact that he’d just said that he missed Josh. The words made his heart skip a beat and he reached up to touch Cooper’s face, reassuring himself that the other boy was actually standing in front of him and he wasn’t having some crazy dream. “My…uh…my room’s up…upstairs,” he said, swallowing convulsively when Cooper turned his face into Josh’s hand and kissed his palm.
“Hey, France,” Nick called over his shoulder, reminding Josh that Cooper’s cousin was sitting in his living room flipping through the channels on the cable. He turned glazed eyes in the direction of the voice, not quite focusing on Nick.
“Yeah?”
“You got anything to eat? Fucking starving, Loverboy here was a total asshole about stopping.”
Josh chuckled and glanced at Cooper again, but Cooper was too busy working Josh’s tee shirt up over his chest to worry about the conversation. “There’s…uh…there’s…” He trailed off as Cooper’s mouth landed on his chest, latching onto a nipple. “Fuck…in the fridge, whatever you want,” he finally managed to choke out. “My mom left something…f-for dinner.”
“He’ll be fine,” Cooper snarled as he straightened up and yanked Josh’s shirt over his head, taking hold of Josh’s hips and backing him toward the stairs. “We need way more naked right now.”
Josh nodded and somehow managed to get his legs to carry him up the stairs, only vaguely registering Nick’s parting shot about certain visuals ruining his appetite anyway. He pulled Cooper behind him into his bedroom, pausing long enough to shut the door before he found himself being pushed down onto the bed. A second later Cooper was on top of him, his hands fumbling with the zipper on Josh’s jeans as Josh pulled him down for another desperate kiss. They were both in a hurry and it was going to be over way too fast, but almost three months of anticipation and the sudden rush of having Cooper standing in his doorway was too much for Josh.
He lifted his hips off the bed long enough for Cooper to yank the rest of his clothes off, groaning as his steadily growing erection made contact with Cooper’s still denim-clad groin. His hands slid under Cooper’s shirt to urge it over his chest, forcing Cooper to pull away long enough to pull it over his head and toss it on the floor. Once his shirt was taken care of Cooper paused, digging in the pocket of his jeans with fingers made clumsy with impatience. Finally he retrieved a condom and a tube of lube, tossing both on the mattress next to Josh before he reached for the waistband of his jeans.
Josh swallowed hard as he watched Cooper push his jeans and boxers down his thighs, kicking off his shoes before he peeled off the rest of his clothes and tossed them on the floor. He wasn’t sure whether to be flattered or worried by Cooper’s urgency; part of him was in just as big a hurry to renew their connection, but he couldn’t quite ignore the nervous tension tempering the growing need in the pit of his stomach. There was no reason to be nervous, he knew Cooper and it wasn’t like they hadn’t been in contact since the last time they were together. Still, phone calls were one thing, having Cooper actually in his bedroom was completely different.
“Josh?” Cooper slid down on the mattress next to Josh, sliding one arm around his waist and turning Josh gently toward him. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” Josh answered, his face flushing as he realized he wasn’t doing a very good job of keeping his anxiousness to himself. He hadn’t intended to kill the mood, but now that Cooper was looking at him with that concerned expression he was even more nervous. “I just didn’t expect you, that’s all. I can’t believe you’re actually here.”
Cooper groaned and closed his eyes, and Josh’s heart plummeted into the pit of his stomach. Everything in him was still aching for Cooper’s touch, but somehow he’d managed to say exactly the wrong thing and now everything was ruined. He started to pull away but as soon as he moved Cooper’s eyes opened again, and Josh froze as he registered his own misery mirrored back in Cooper’s expression. “And the first thing I do when I walk in the door is jump you. God, I’m such an asshole. I think not having sex for three months is making me crazy, because all I’ve thought about since October is the next time I get to touch you.”
“That’s pretty much all I’ve been thinking about too,” Josh admitted, a flood of relief hitting him when Cooper mentioned that he hadn’t had sex since the last time they were together. It was true that Josh had spent a lot of time thinking about the next time he and Cooper would be together, but he’d spent at least as much time wondering if there would be a next time. Most of Cooper’s phone calls consisted of telling Josh where he was going and who was going to be there, and he couldn’t help wondering if Cooper thought of them as exclusive or if Josh was just a passing interest for him. Not that he could really blame Cooper if he got bored and moved on, it wasn’t like they could just get together whenever they felt like it.
“It’s stupid,” Josh added, suddenly embarrassed that they were even having this conversation. “It’s just weird that you’re actually in my house, you know? I mean I’m glad you’re here, don’t get me wrong.”
Cooper grinned and trailed one hand up Josh’s back to rest against his neck, slowly drawing Josh toward him until they were nose to nose. “I’m glad I’m here too,” he said just before he leaned forward a final inch and fused their mouths together again.
Josh groaned into Cooper’s mouth and pressed their hips together, swallowing a sob at the almost painful contact. Cooper was right, it had been way too long since they got a chance to do this. He knew how much he’d missed Cooper; it seemed crazy when they hardly even knew each other but that didn’t stop him from thinking about it pretty much every waking moment of the day. They rocked together as they kissed, legs hopelessly tangled and erections sliding more or less awkwardly together. Josh wouldn’t have been able to voice what he needed if he wanted to, all he knew was that he needed more. He thrust harder against Cooper, evoking a tortured groan from the body plastered against him.
As soon as Cooper reached between them and closed his hand around both of them Josh knew what it was he’d been looking for, and he thrust hard into the vice grip pressing their erections together and moaned his release into Cooper’s mouth. Cooper kept up a steady rhythm as Josh shuddered against him, releasing Josh’s mouth to suck hard on his neck. When the last spasm of pleasure subsided Cooper let Josh slip out of his grasp, wrapping a slick hand around his own aching cock and stroking as fast as he could. A few more thrusts was all it took, blunt teeth pressing into Josh’s skin as Cooper lost control.
When he finally stopped shaking Cooper collapsed back onto the mattress, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. He felt something warm and wet on his neck and forced his eyes open just in time to watch Josh slide down his chest, licking Cooper’s skin clean as he made his way to his stomach. Cooper lifted one boneless arm to run his fingers through Josh’s hair, silently encouraging him as the other boy reached his destination and tentatively ran his tongue up Cooper’s length. He sucked in a sharp breath as his spent cock twitched in response, his eyes rolling back as Josh closed his mouth around the tip and slid as far down Cooper’s length as he could.
He was surprised to find himself getting hard again already, but almost three months with nothing but his hand for company and twelve hours of anticipation during the drive to Indiana had definitely taken their toll. Not to mention the fact that this was the first time Josh had ever used that amazing mouth for something other than kissing, and he wasn’t about to let an opportunity like this pass him by. All the way from Buffalo all he’d been able to think about was burying himself as deep inside Josh as possible, but the minute he stopped long enough to see how nervous Josh was at his unexpected visit he’d resigned himself to a quick hand job and a little more patience. This still wasn’t quite the same as actually being inside Josh, but it was mind-blowing nevertheless.
It took him longer to come the second time but Josh seemed up to the challenge, sucking enthusiastically if not as skillfully as Cooper had ever experienced. The thought that this was the first time Josh had ever done this sent a rush of propriety through Cooper and he opened his eyes, groaning as he watched Josh’s lips sliding up and down his shaft. As soon as Josh looked up and their eyes met Cooper lost it, his second orgasm taking him by surprise. Josh gagged a little and pulled back, swallowing around Cooper’s length before he pulled away completely and collapsed against the mattress again.
If Cooper could have moved he probably would have returned the favor, but his entire body felt paralyzed. He shivered with each aftershock of pleasure, his eyes wide and unfocused as he waited for his body to work again. Not that he’d mind just lying there next to Josh for the rest of his life, he could think of much worse ways to die.
“Cooper?”
“Yeah?” he managed to say, the sound of his own voice foreign to him in the stillness of the room.
The body next to him shifted and he looked over to find Josh staring down at him, his head propped up on one elbow and his other hand hovering over Cooper’s chest for one uncertain moment before Cooper finally reached up and closed his own hand around it. He entwined their fingers together and pressed both hands to his chest, not even sure how he’d summoned that much energy except that he hated to see Josh looking so anxious.
“How long can you stay?” Josh finally asked.
“Nick’s mom made us promise to be back by Friday,” Cooper answered, sighing at the thought of leaving so soon after he’d gotten there. “The whole family gets together for a huge New Year’s Eve thing every year, if Nick misses it because of me I’ll probably be grounded until college. So we’ve gotta be on the road sometime on Thursday.”
Four days. It wasn’t as long as Josh had hoped, but it was more time than they’d had together so far. It was strange to think that they’d really only spent two days together, especially considering how much Cooper knew about him. The truth was that Cooper probably knew Josh better than anyone in his life, mainly because he was the only person Josh could be completely honest with. Cooper’s life was a lot different than his, though; he lived by a different set of rules, and as far as Josh knew he didn’t have to hide who he was from the people around him.
Thinking about Cooper’s life back in Buffalo always made Josh wonder why Cooper bothered with him, but so far the only explanation he’d been able to come up with was that Cooper was still charmed by Josh’s relative innocence. He tried not to think about it too much, though, because whenever he did he started wondering how much longer he had before Cooper got bored and moved on.
“Hey,” Cooper said, tugging on the hand still gripped firmly in his. “Is it okay that we just showed up? Maybe I should have called, but I wanted to surprise you.”
“No, I mean it’s fine, I’m glad you’re here,” Josh said too quickly, panic setting in at the thought of Cooper getting up and leaving already. “I was just thinking about how four days is the longest we’ll have spent together so far.”
“Pretty weird, huh?” Cooper laughed and let go of Josh’s hand, rolling onto his side to face the other boy. “Do you think your mom will mind if we crash here tonight? We could go get a room if it’s gonna freak her out to come home and find Nick on the couch. Or I could send him to a hotel, he’ll give me shit about making him go alone but I’d rather stay here. If it’s okay.”
Josh smiled shyly, his heart skipping a beat at the thought of spending the night in Cooper’s arms. It was amazing how much he’d missed even that since he left New York; he’d only had two nights to get used to it but after almost three months he still remembered what it felt like to have Cooper’s arms around him every time he closed his eyes at night. “It’s fine, I’ll just call her and tell her so she doesn’t call the cops or something.” He stretched and pushed himself into a sitting position, shivering as the cold air hit his bare skin. “Are you hungry?”
“Starving,” Cooper admitted as he pushed himself off the mattress and dug through the pile of clothes on the floor for his boxers. “Nick’s right, I was a total asshole about stopping. Longest twelve hours of my life.”
Josh laughed as he pulled his boxers back on and grabbed his jeans and a new tee shirt. “You know, maybe I’m glad I didn’t know you were coming after all. I would have been driving myself crazy waiting for you to show up.” He turned back to Cooper and grabbed the front of the shirt he’d just pulled back on, hauling the other boy toward him for a hard kiss. “I gotta go clean up, I’ll be down in a few minutes.”
Cooper nodded and kissed him again, reluctantly letting Josh pull out of his reach when they finally broke apart. He stood in the center of the bedroom for a long time after Josh headed for the bathroom, his heart pounding against his rib cage as it finally sank in that he was actually there. When he heard the shower start he shook his head and forced himself to go back downstairs, knowing that if he stood there any longer he was going to end up in the shower with Josh.
~
Josh turned off the shower and shook the water out of his hair, reaching for a towel and closing his eyes as he dried himself off. He still couldn’t believe that Cooper was actually in Indiana, let alone in his house eating his mother’s food. He got dressed slowly, suddenly nervous about going downstairs and facing the two boys watching TV in his living room. It was one thing seeing Cooper again; he at least wanted to be there. Nick, however, was a different story entirely, and Josh was starting to wonder if Cooper ever went anywhere without his cousin.
It wasn’t like Cooper had never threatened to just show up at his door, but Josh had never taken him seriously. He’d figured it was too far, that his parents would never go for Cooper driving twelve hours to southern Indiana to see some guy they’d never heard of. He wondered suddenly if Cooper had told his parents about Josh, if anyone knew about him. Josh had mentioned making a couple friends at the Mock United Nations when his mother asked, but he’d never told her much more than Cooper’s name. He hadn’t mentioned him to any of his friends at school; he’d wanted to believe it was so he wouldn’t have to lie about what Cooper meant to him, but deep down he knew it was because he was afraid the minute he started talking about Cooper they’d all be able to tell.
As much as that thought worried him it didn’t bother him half as much as the force of his own feelings, because the second Cooper smiled at him and pulled him forward into a kiss it all came rushing right back. He’d hoped that having a couple months to get over that first rush of infatuation would make it easier if he ever did see Cooper again, but he was as nervous now as he had been that first day in New York. He stared critically at his reflection in the mirror, fingering the fresh bruise forming on his neck as he realized that anyone that saw him with Cooper was probably going to know.
He took a deep breath and forced himself to go back downstairs, steeling himself against whatever insult Nick would most likely hurl at him the minute he walked into the living room. So he was shocked when Nick looked up from the plate of food on his lap and actually smiled almost pleasantly, and he stopped just short of pinching himself to make sure he really was awake.
“Hey, France. This is great chicken, even for a non-Italian. Props to your mom.”
“Uh…thanks. I’ll tell her you liked it,” Josh said, his forehead furrowed as he sank into a chair next to the couch. “Where’s Cooper?”
“Kitchen,” Nick answered without looking up. “It’s cool of you to let us crash here tonight. Sure your mom’s not gonna flip?”
Josh shook his head and reached for the phone, dialing the number of the hospital where his mother worked. “No, she won’t care as long as we don’t wake her up in the morning,” he said as he listened to the phone ring. “She’s on nights, she won’t be back until after 1:00.”
He listened to the recording at the other end of the line and then punched in the extension that would connect him to the floor his mother worked on, glancing over his shoulder as the door to the kitchen swung open behind him. His heart skipped a beat as Cooper grinned at him and threw himself down on the couch next to Nick, watching Josh out of the corner of his eye as he finally got a person on the phone and asked to speak to his mother.
“Hey, Mom,” Josh said, biting his bottom lip nervously as he stared at the floor. “You remember that guy I told you I met in New York? Well he and his cousin dropped by. Yes. Just for a couple days…yes, their parents know where they are. Mom, I just called to tell you that Nick’s going to sleep on the couch tonight, so don’t call the cops or anything when you come in and find him there. Okay. Alright. Bye, Mom.”
He rolled his eyes and hung up the phone, not daring to look over at Cooper and Nick. He knew they were just waiting for him to look up so they could make some crack about how cute it was that his mom asked about their parents or make fun of him for needing to ask her permission to let them stay. He had no idea what their families were like, but he got the feeling things at their houses were a lot different than what passed for normal in Sandborn.
“You told your mom about me?”
Josh looked up sharply, forgetting his humiliation that they’d heard him talking to his mother when he caught the amused and slightly awed look on Cooper’s face. He swallowed hard as he realized what Cooper thought he’d told his mother, a hot blush creeping into his cheeks. “I just told her we hung out, she doesn’t know…” He trailed off and glanced over at Nick, clearing his throat and shifting uncomfortably in his chair.
“Oh.” Cooper’s smile faltered for a second before he caught himself and forced himself to brighten again. “You sure we should stay tonight?”
Josh’s gaze shifted to Cooper just in time to see his smile waver, and he frowned as he wondered why Cooper would care what he’d told his mother. He’d expected at least Nick to make fun of him, but so far Nick hadn’t even looked at him and Cooper looked almost disappointed.
“Give him a break, man,” Nick said suddenly, surprising Josh into looking over at him. The blonde stood up without looking at Josh, reaching in his coat pocket for his cigarettes. “He said it was cool if we stayed here. You’re lucky he didn’t slam the door in your face for not calling first. I told you to call.”
Nick turned toward the front door and let himself out onto the porch, a cigarette hanging from his lips as he reached for his lighter with one hand and closed the door behind him with the other. As soon as the door clicked shut Josh snapped his jaw closed, his mind reeling as he wondered if he’d just imagined the last two minutes of his life. First Cooper looked practically giddy at the thought that Josh might have come out to his mom, and then Nick defended him when he admitted he hadn’t done it. Something was definitely weird here; maybe he’d slipped on the ice on the way home and he was in a coma, or maybe he’d gotten food poisoning from the questionable pizza he’d eaten at lunchtime and now he was delirious. Either way he had to be imagining things, because he couldn’t handle it if any of this was real.
He stood up and picked up Nick’s empty plate, carefully avoiding Cooper’s gaze as he crossed to the kitchen and pushed the door open. When he was alone again he let out a deep breath and set the plate in the sink, turning on the water and watching it run down the drain. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been standing there when the kitchen door opened again, but a minute later Cooper set his own plate down in the sink and shut the water off. Josh stifled a sigh as Cooper’s arms slid around his waist, and he turned to look into brown eyes full of questions he wasn’t sure he wanted to answer.
“I thought he hated me,” Josh said, glancing over Cooper’s shoulder in the direction of the front porch.
Cooper laughed and pulled Josh a little closer, his fingers trailing through the other boy’s hair to land at the back of his neck. “Nah, he doesn’t mean 80 percent of what he says. And anyway he doesn’t like anyone at first, but after awhile you start to grow on him. Besides, who cares what he thinks. I like you.”
Josh relaxed marginally as a nervous grin tugged at the corners of his mouth, his arms circling Cooper’s back as he felt himself being pulled forward for a lingering kiss. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to kissing Cooper; the mere fact that he could do it was mind-blowing enough, but the knowledge that Cooper still wanted him after more than two months apart was what kept threatening to bring him to his knees. He’d expected winter break to be just two boring weeks away from school, most of it spent staring at his ceiling and wondering what Cooper was doing. Never in a million years would he have guessed that Cooper would be standing in his kitchen two days after Christmas, trailing kisses down his neck to suck on the side he hadn’t already marked.
He chuckled low in his throat as his fingers stroked Cooper’s hair, craning his neck a little to give the other boy better access. “At least it’s cold enough to wear turtlenecks now.”
“No way,” Cooper said, pulling back to look up at Josh. “Not while I’m here.” He frowned and looked down at Josh’s neck, trailing his fingers across first the fresh mark and then its twin on the other side of Josh’s neck. “Josh…God, just…not while I’m here, okay?”
Josh swallowed convulsively, somehow wrestling his motor skills into submission long enough to nod. He knew he was going to be answering a lot of uncomfortable questions from not only his mother but probably kids from school if they ran into anyone he knew while Cooper was in town, but the way Cooper looked at him when he said not while I’m here made it worth it. Suddenly four days seemed like a long time, long enough to drag Josh out of the closet whether either of them intended for it to happen or not. He took a deep breath and reached for Cooper’s hand, pulling him out of the kitchen and past the couch where Nick was once again channel surfing.
“There’s a pillow and some blankets in the hall closet,” he said, pausing long enough to look down at Nick. “The couch folds out.”
They didn’t wait for an answer, in fact by the time Josh was done talking they were already halfway to the stairs. He let Cooper pull him up to the second floor and into his bedroom before he pulled his hand out of the other boy’s, closing the door before he pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor. Cooper’s own shirt hit the floor a moment later, followed by the jeans he’d pulled back on long enough to go downstairs and eat. He sat on the edge of the bed and watched as Josh mirrored his actions, reaching for the zipper of his jeans and sliding them to the floor.
Cooper leaned back and watched as Josh crossed the small room and knelt on the end of the mattress, his fingers splayed invitingly across his thighs as he waited for Cooper to make some kind of move. Cooper smiled and turned so he was facing Josh, taking the time to admire the angles of Josh’s shoulders and the red marks on either side of his neck. He knew he couldn’t explain to Josh why it mattered to him whether Josh covered them or not, he’d never been that good with words and he’d never be able to make Josh understand.
Maybe it wasn’t fair to ask Josh to walk around with the evidence of their relationship right there where everyone could see it, but he hated having to pretend they were just friends in public. He knew when he talked Nick into driving to Indiana that he wasn’t going to be able to touch Josh when they went out, that he couldn’t hold his hand or just kiss him in front of people that knew him. He couldn’t even tell Josh how beautiful he was or what it did to him to see that expanse of pale skin that he’d been dreaming about for the past three months. Finally he leaned forward, hoping to convey everything he couldn’t say with a single kiss.
Josh sighed into the kiss and pulled Cooper instinctively closer, his head spinning from the combination of the kiss and the knowledge that it mattered to Cooper that everyone Josh knew saw the marks on his neck. He knew from their first two days together that Cooper had a tendency to get a little carried away in that respect, but he’d managed to keep the last round of hickeys covered pretty well when he got back to Indiana. Still, it was kind of nice to see the reminder of his first time with Cooper on his skin for days after he got home. The knowledge that Cooper wanted people to know about them - that he wanted to drag Josh as far out of the closet as Josh would let him - was more than Josh had let himself hope for.
He’d thought about just coming out and dealing with the consequences more than once in the past, and after he met Cooper the urge to just get it over with was even stronger. Every time he got close something would happen, though, someone would make a joke or even just look at him funny and ask him what was wrong and he’d slam the door shut on his secret again. When he was with Cooper it seemed so easy, as though everyone should know the truth. He wanted to be able to tell his friends and his mom how happy he was whenever he was with Cooper, or even when he called just to ask what Josh was doing.
Slowly Cooper sank back onto the mattress, one hand behind Josh’s neck to pull the other boy on top of him without breaking the kiss. Josh’s stomach flipped as he settled between Cooper’s legs and a hand slid under the waistband of his boxers, instinctively grinding his hips into Cooper’s as his mouth left the other boy’s to trail down his neck. When he reached Cooper’s collarbone he latched on and sucked gently, his hips moving rhythmically as he left his own mark on Cooper’s skin.
Cooper groaned and fumbled in the sheets for the tube he’d dropped earlier, arching his back into Josh as he finally closed his hand around it. He got the top off and squeezed some lube onto his fingers, letting it warm up a little before he slid his hand under the waistband of Josh’s boxers and ghosted slick fingers over his opening. Josh gasped and thrust down to try to draw the teasing fingers inside him, but as soon as Cooper’s hand appeared it was gone. Before he had a chance to react he felt his boxers sliding down his hips, and he lifted himself up long enough to help Cooper wrestle them off before he rolled over onto his stomach.
He heard a sharp intake of breath and he looked over at Cooper in time to watch him peel off his own boxers. A hand trailed down his back to rest on his hip, urging him back onto his side. Cooper fused their lips together again and pulled Josh’s leg up over his hip before his hand dipped lower, one slick finger circling Josh’s entrance before it slid slowly inside. A low groan escaped Josh’s throat as he thrust back, ignoring the slight discomfort as he tried to get Cooper as far inside him as he could. This was what he’d been thinking about for the past three months, dreaming about it and fantasizing at the worst possible times.
All he had to do was picture Cooper and he remembered exactly what it felt like to be with him, and more often than not he’d end up hard and frustrated in the middle of class. He was still self-conscious about the fact that he was so much less experienced than Cooper, but when they were together it didn’t matter as much anymore. The combined sensations of Cooper’s mouth moving against his and Cooper’s finger stretching him threatened to fry what was left of his senses, and when he felt a second finger join the first he gasped and tore his lips away from Cooper’s.
“Josh? You wanna stop?” Cooper asked, stilling against the other boy as he watched Josh’s eyes fly open.
“No. God no,” Josh managed to gasp. “I just…I didn’t even know how much I missed you.”
Cooper smiled and leaned forward to press his lips to Josh’s again, pulling his hand away from Josh’s body long enough to fumble for the lube. He slipped the condom on with shaking fingers and quickly coated it with lube, his heart pounding against his ribcage the entire time. He’d spent so much time thinking about this moment that he wasn’t sure how long he’d last, but he needed to be inside Josh again. For the past three months he’d tried to convince himself that he’d imagined the connection between them, that he’d just developed an infatuation for a cute guy he didn’t really know. That had to be it, he’d remembered this amazing connection between them because they’d only had two days and he’d wished it was more.
He took hold of Josh’s hip and pushed him back onto his stomach, swallowing as Josh pushed himself up onto his knees and spread his legs apart. One hand landed on Josh’s hip to hold him steady as he sank slowly into velvet heat, closing his eyes and clenching his teeth as he struggled to keep himself from thrusting before Josh was ready. He ran a soothing hand over Josh’s back as he listened to the other boy’s breathing change, then slowly Josh relaxed and pushed back until Cooper was buried as deep as he could go. Cooper bit back a gasp as the feeling of completeness threatened to overwhelm him; he hadn’t been with that many people, but no one he’d ever been with had felt this right. It felt almost like he and Josh had known each other their whole lives, as though they’d been doing this for years.
Slowly he pulled out, struggling not to react to the loss of their connection before he plunged back in again. Josh groaned and thrust back to meet him, his whole body shaking as Cooper scraped over his prostate. Maybe it was crazy, he’d listened to Nick tell him for almost three months that it was crazy to think about Josh all the time when they didn’t even really know each other. He couldn’t help it, though, and he didn’t want to because when they were together nothing else mattered. Not their families, not what the world thought of them - all that mattered was that they were together, and Cooper wanted Josh more than he’d ever wanted anyone.
They rocked together in a steady rhythm, Josh shuddering and moaning low in his throat every time Cooper angled for his prostate. With every thrust Josh shook a little more, until finally Cooper pulled them both back onto his knees, wrapping his arms around Josh’s waist as Josh leaned back against his chest. His thrusts had less force in that position, but he didn’t want it to end too soon. He pressed his lips to Josh’s shoulder and closed one hand around the other boy’s length, stroking in time to each sharp thrust.
Josh rocked helplessly between Cooper’s hand and his lap, his lips parted and his breath coming in short gasps. He wasn’t even sure where he was anymore, all he knew was the amazing pleasure centered in the pit of his stomach. Then Cooper’s strokes got a little faster and his mouth opened on Josh’s shoulder, and Josh lost control and came with a gasp. He clamped down hard on Cooper, shuddering as each wave of pleasure wracked his body. He was vaguely aware of Cooper moaning his own release into Josh’s shoulder, blunt teeth scraping his skin as Cooper thrust deep and followed him over the edge.
Harsh panting was the only sound in the room as Josh slid off Cooper’s lap and collapsed on the mattress, forcing one eye open to watch Cooper drag himself off the bed long enough to dispose of the condom. When he felt Cooper’s weight hit the mattress again he groaned and forced his body to work with him long enough to move over, sighing at the welcome weight of Cooper’s body settling against him in the small bed. He knew he should insist that they both get dressed again, or at the very least put their boxers back on. He couldn’t bring himself to ask Cooper to do it, though, even though it meant risking his mother finding them tangled together in his narrow bed.
“Josh?” Cooper’s breath warmed his cheek as he spoke, and Josh turned his head slightly to nuzzle Cooper’s hair.
“Yeah?”
He heard the rustling of sheets as Cooper pushed himself up on the pillow to look down at him, one hand landing on Josh’s cheek to stroke his skin. “What do you think would happen if you told your mom about us? I mean if you came out to her. What do you think she'd say?”
Josh could hear the hesitation in Cooper’s voice, and he forced his eyes open to look up at the other boy. He wasn’t sure why it mattered so much to Cooper whether his mom knew about them or not, but obviously it bothered him since he’d brought it up twice on his first night in town. “I don’t know,” he answered, figuring honesty was all he could offer. “I mean sometimes I wonder if she knows already. It’s not like I date that much, she’s gotta figure something’s up. But even if she was okay with it I don’t think she’d be that cool about us having sex under her roof.”
“So you date girls,” Cooper said, it wasn’t supposed to sound like an accusation but Josh couldn’t help flinching as he watched jealousy flash in Cooper’s eyes.
“Well, yeah, I mean I did.” Josh paused and pushed himself up onto an elbow to face Cooper. “After everybody stopped going to school dances and stuff as a group it just sort of happened. That’s when I first started to realize I wasn’t that interested in girls. I mean I haven’t gone out with anybody since…I wouldn’t do that.”
The raw vulnerability in Josh’s eyes made Cooper’s stomach twist, and he instantly regretted bringing up any subject that made Josh look that guilty. It wasn’t his fault Cooper didn’t understand how his life worked, it was one thing to hear about this stuff on the news but Cooper had never really dealt with it. His own parents more or less ignored his lifestyle, and the rest of his family was supportive, albeit sometimes grudgingly. Besides, he had Nick to watch his back, Josh didn’t have anybody.
“Me either,” he finally said, pulling Josh back down onto the pillow with him and sliding one arm around the other boy’s waist. “I wasn’t sure I could do this whole long distance thing, you know? But it’s worth it.”
Josh smiled into Cooper’s shoulder and closed his eyes again, focusing on the warmth radiating from Cooper’s skin and the way he felt pressed close to Josh. “So did you tell your parents about me?”
Cooper chuckled softly and tightened his grip on Josh’s waist, leaning forward to plant a soft kiss on his lips before he closed his eyes again. “Yeah, Josh. I tell everybody about you.”