LOST Fic: The one thing in the whole world that Kate does care about... 1/?
My undying love and devotion and gratitude to the awesome f3iv3lin3 for this beautiful icon of Kate and her plane :) I <3 this icon so much, and you're just the most amazingly talented and fan-fucking-tastic person that i know! xoxox
“The one thing in the whole world that Kate does care about”
kate/juliet
**Once again i have twisted things to suit my plot. Kate is imprisoned in the hydra chamber instead of Jack in season 3. My take on an alternate first meeting for Kate and Juliet, from Juliet's POV. No offence to anyone of their favourite characters, just written in fun. Enjoy **
Kate Austen sits huddled in the corner of the hydra chamber. Silently. Not quite still, but serene. In her eyes Juliet sees something like peace. Something like insanity. Something telling her that the other woman is in a faraway place. Not stranded on an uncharted island in the middle of nowhere with no hope of escape, not imprisoned in the hydra station at the mercy of Benjamin Linus. But in a distant, surreal location. Something about Kate unexpectedly appears so innocent and ingenuous. So childlike and small. And Juliet struggles against the faintest glimmer of instinct to protect her.
Kate’s fingers hold tightly to the toy air-plane, pushing it along as if it were soaring through the sky. She does her best with her hands cuffed together, slowly and methodically moving that toy backwards and forwards, over and over again. She had dropped it, once, and frantically scrambled to pick it up. Her entire demeanour changing once she held that toy safely in her hand. She resumed her ritual without skipping a beat, following that plane with her gaze intently. A sad tranquillity present in her eyes, accompanied by the rhythmic clinking of the metal handcuffs as she moved.
Juliet stands, mesmerised. It occurs to her that this is a bizarre performance to lull her into a false sense of security. But she dismisses the notion almost instantly. What she sees in that moment is something so raw and untainted, it isn't conceivable that this is an act. Kate seems to share such an intimate connection with the object, that Juliet feels like an intruder. Feels almost guilty for just being present in the room for this sacred ritual. So Juliet stands, mutely and unobtrusively, watching.
If Kate notices the other woman watching her, she makes no sign of it. So entranced is she in her play. Juliet tries to pity her, this sad pathetic grown woman, playing so fervently with a plastic child’s toy. And yet Juliet finds herself fighting that stab on envy in her heart as she senses the perverse calmness radiating from the other woman. It isn't easy to believe this was the same woman who only hours ago had been kicking and screaming, fighting for her very life so passionately.
So this is Kate, Juliet thinks to herself. Cold blooded, quick tempered, 'fight to the death' Kate? Kate whose screams echoed across the entire village as Jack and Sawyer were beaten in front of her , Kate who caused more than a few injuries to Juliet’s colleagues as she fought them off. This is Kate, who callously, remorselessly murdered her father, Kate who robbed a bank but left all the money behind, Kate who evaded capture and survived on the run for years on end, Kate who survived a plane crash in this god forsaken place. This is Kate who had Jack and Sawyer falling all over themselves to claim her. Passionate, destructive, intense, merciful, resourceful, foolish, reckless Kate. This is the one who had piqued Ben’s interest. The one Ben had sent Juliet to break. And how easy it had been to break her. Juliet finds it almost disappointing to witness to this unbreakable Kate crumbling to pieces before her very eyes. Juliet finds it beyond disappointing.
Now that the fighting spirit has been extinguished from Kate's eyes, Juliet stops for a moment, to wonder just what it was that Kate had been fighting for? Had she really been fighting for her freedom? For survival? Or just out of stubborn refusal to surrender, refusal to be defeated? That was the impression Juliet had already formed in her mind of the other woman. A rebel without a cause. A woman who fought for the sake of fighting, Ran for the sake of running, hoped for the sake of hoping. What could this other woman possibly be hoping against hope for?
Why hadn’t Kate left the beach with Jack and the other survivors to settle at the caves. Why was she so unable to turn her back on that minute hope of miraculous rescue. Unwilling to. Why had Kate been so desperate to take Sawyers place on that raft? What kind of life did she have to go home to?
Juliet shakes her head slightly, reminding herself that she isn't qualified to judge the value of Kate's life, Kate's hope. If Kate thought there was something to gain escaping back to real world, so be it.
Juliet wonders where the hell that hope comes from. That fighting spirit. Juliet wonders what that impossible hope feels like. Juliet wonders if it hurts.
Juliet knows she is letting her own bitterness creep into her thoughts. Juliet is the one stranded here, without hope. Juliet has resigned herself to living this way, forever. Secure in the knowledge that while there may very well be a way to escape this island, there was certainly no turning back the clock. Her old life was over. Dead. Kate's was too. It would serve Kate well to get used to that fact sooner rather than later. Juliet cant help but draw her own pessimistic conclusions. The woman was doomed, even if she survived this, even if she escaped. Kate was predestined to a life of misery, loneliness, and soul crushing guilt. It didn't seem worth it, not worth fighting so valiantly so passionately for survival. For escape. And yet Juliet somehow expected her to fight for it. Expected to fight her every step of the way.
What Juliet had not expected, was this. Strange silent stillness, almost like death. What Juliet had not expected was the way her own heart stopped beating for just a moment, Hadn't expected the way her breath caught in her throat as she gazed upon that hollow emptiness in Kate's eyes.
Juliet had prepared thoroughly for her mission, had read every word Ben provided her with about Kate Austen. She had been enthralled, enraptured by this enigma that was Kate. And finally here was the woman in the flesh, living and breathing before her very eyes. Yet it only brought more questions than answers.
Juliet had always distanced herself from people she captured, a necessity for her own survival. She never allowed herself to connect with them as human beings. But something about Kate intrigued Juliet. Something about Kate magnified itself a thousand times over and transplanted itself into Juliet's soul. Juliet had long since learned to push her own feelings aside, along with other peoples. But the sheer intensity radiating from the other woman stops Juliet in her tracks. As her eyes locked with Kate's, Juliet finds herself desperate to know everything there is to know about this woman before her.
Juliet knows Kate is courageous, undoubtedly. She also knows that Kate is deeply insecure, distrustful. But she had not expected the magnitude of terror she had seen flash across Kate's eyes. Had not expected it to pierce her own heart.
Juliet isn't sure yet if she thinks Kate is a strong woman. Sure, she survived on her own all those years, with nothing. Survived that plane crash and these weeks on the island. Yet it is the emotional weakness Juliet despises in her. Letting her anger, fear, love, get the better of her time and time over. Sure Kate was capable of clever deception at times, but she had been true to her heart. Always. That was the weakness that caused her downfall.
The idea that Kate is intelligent was debatable. Sitting playing with a child’s toy while her own life at stake was less than clever. Add this bizarre behaviour to the endless list of downright stupid things Kate had done her life, repeating the same mistakes over and over. Kate had proven herself to be self destructive, thoughtless and reckless. And one look at her life, it was plain to see Kate had little, if anything, to show for her choices. Nothing that justified all that stupidity.
But Juliet hesitates to dismiss her entirely as an idiot. Kate had also proven herself resourceful and clever. By her efforts to survive on the island, to ensure the survival of her people. By the years she evaded capture by the marshals. Only to be caught in the end because she was unable to leave a man to die in a car wreck. So perhaps Kate was foolish, but not stupid and certainly but not heartless. In fact it was almost admirable.
Juliet doesn't ask herself the question , if she were the one running for her life, her freedom, for her chance to get off this island, would she have left that man to die in that car? A man who turned her in, a man who betrayed her? Juliet doesn't ask herself, because she isn’t sure she wants to know the answer. Juliet doesn't ask herself just what makes her own life different from Kate's. Kate was hardly the only one who had made stupid choices, who had nothing to show for her life, Kate wasn't the only one imprisoned in this hellish place, the only one who had no hope.
Juliet quickly gives up contemplating the mystery of Kate's courage, intelligence and compassion. Instead Juliet decides that Kate's trump card is her charisma. She won people over easily. No one had suspected at first that she had been the fugitive on that plane. People liked Kate, loved her even. And Juliet wonders why. Is it just the fact that she is beautiful ? Seeing Kate in the flesh- even after weeks stranded on the island, days of imprisonment, starvation and beatings, It remained an undeniable fact- Kate was beautiful. A kind of raw beauty that couldn't be tarnished. But it was something deeper than physical beauty that drew people in, against their will, against their better judgement. Some kind of magic power weaving its way through Juliet's own heart right at that very moment.
What was it about Kate Austen that caused Jack to scream her name, and her name alone, as they tortured him? Surpassing his anger, his own judgements, his undeniable disappointment at her deception ? What was it about Kate that caused Juliet's heart to catch in her throat as her piercing screams for mercy fell over the hushed village?
Then there was that most perplexing thing of all- That damn stupid toy plane that now occupied Kate's entire attention. Juliet recalled the fear she had evoked in Kate's eyes only minutes ago, before Juliet had even laid eyes upon that plane, let alone touched it....
Continued in part 2 http://carlyisnot.livejournal.com/22001.html
“The one thing in the whole world that Kate does care about”
kate/juliet
**Once again i have twisted things to suit my plot. Kate is imprisoned in the hydra chamber instead of Jack in season 3. My take on an alternate first meeting for Kate and Juliet, from Juliet's POV. No offence to anyone of their favourite characters, just written in fun. Enjoy **
Kate Austen sits huddled in the corner of the hydra chamber. Silently. Not quite still, but serene. In her eyes Juliet sees something like peace. Something like insanity. Something telling her that the other woman is in a faraway place. Not stranded on an uncharted island in the middle of nowhere with no hope of escape, not imprisoned in the hydra station at the mercy of Benjamin Linus. But in a distant, surreal location. Something about Kate unexpectedly appears so innocent and ingenuous. So childlike and small. And Juliet struggles against the faintest glimmer of instinct to protect her.
Kate’s fingers hold tightly to the toy air-plane, pushing it along as if it were soaring through the sky. She does her best with her hands cuffed together, slowly and methodically moving that toy backwards and forwards, over and over again. She had dropped it, once, and frantically scrambled to pick it up. Her entire demeanour changing once she held that toy safely in her hand. She resumed her ritual without skipping a beat, following that plane with her gaze intently. A sad tranquillity present in her eyes, accompanied by the rhythmic clinking of the metal handcuffs as she moved.
Juliet stands, mesmerised. It occurs to her that this is a bizarre performance to lull her into a false sense of security. But she dismisses the notion almost instantly. What she sees in that moment is something so raw and untainted, it isn't conceivable that this is an act. Kate seems to share such an intimate connection with the object, that Juliet feels like an intruder. Feels almost guilty for just being present in the room for this sacred ritual. So Juliet stands, mutely and unobtrusively, watching.
If Kate notices the other woman watching her, she makes no sign of it. So entranced is she in her play. Juliet tries to pity her, this sad pathetic grown woman, playing so fervently with a plastic child’s toy. And yet Juliet finds herself fighting that stab on envy in her heart as she senses the perverse calmness radiating from the other woman. It isn't easy to believe this was the same woman who only hours ago had been kicking and screaming, fighting for her very life so passionately.
So this is Kate, Juliet thinks to herself. Cold blooded, quick tempered, 'fight to the death' Kate? Kate whose screams echoed across the entire village as Jack and Sawyer were beaten in front of her , Kate who caused more than a few injuries to Juliet’s colleagues as she fought them off. This is Kate, who callously, remorselessly murdered her father, Kate who robbed a bank but left all the money behind, Kate who evaded capture and survived on the run for years on end, Kate who survived a plane crash in this god forsaken place. This is Kate who had Jack and Sawyer falling all over themselves to claim her. Passionate, destructive, intense, merciful, resourceful, foolish, reckless Kate. This is the one who had piqued Ben’s interest. The one Ben had sent Juliet to break. And how easy it had been to break her. Juliet finds it almost disappointing to witness to this unbreakable Kate crumbling to pieces before her very eyes. Juliet finds it beyond disappointing.
Now that the fighting spirit has been extinguished from Kate's eyes, Juliet stops for a moment, to wonder just what it was that Kate had been fighting for? Had she really been fighting for her freedom? For survival? Or just out of stubborn refusal to surrender, refusal to be defeated? That was the impression Juliet had already formed in her mind of the other woman. A rebel without a cause. A woman who fought for the sake of fighting, Ran for the sake of running, hoped for the sake of hoping. What could this other woman possibly be hoping against hope for?
Why hadn’t Kate left the beach with Jack and the other survivors to settle at the caves. Why was she so unable to turn her back on that minute hope of miraculous rescue. Unwilling to. Why had Kate been so desperate to take Sawyers place on that raft? What kind of life did she have to go home to?
Juliet shakes her head slightly, reminding herself that she isn't qualified to judge the value of Kate's life, Kate's hope. If Kate thought there was something to gain escaping back to real world, so be it.
Juliet wonders where the hell that hope comes from. That fighting spirit. Juliet wonders what that impossible hope feels like. Juliet wonders if it hurts.
Juliet knows she is letting her own bitterness creep into her thoughts. Juliet is the one stranded here, without hope. Juliet has resigned herself to living this way, forever. Secure in the knowledge that while there may very well be a way to escape this island, there was certainly no turning back the clock. Her old life was over. Dead. Kate's was too. It would serve Kate well to get used to that fact sooner rather than later. Juliet cant help but draw her own pessimistic conclusions. The woman was doomed, even if she survived this, even if she escaped. Kate was predestined to a life of misery, loneliness, and soul crushing guilt. It didn't seem worth it, not worth fighting so valiantly so passionately for survival. For escape. And yet Juliet somehow expected her to fight for it. Expected to fight her every step of the way.
What Juliet had not expected, was this. Strange silent stillness, almost like death. What Juliet had not expected was the way her own heart stopped beating for just a moment, Hadn't expected the way her breath caught in her throat as she gazed upon that hollow emptiness in Kate's eyes.
Juliet had prepared thoroughly for her mission, had read every word Ben provided her with about Kate Austen. She had been enthralled, enraptured by this enigma that was Kate. And finally here was the woman in the flesh, living and breathing before her very eyes. Yet it only brought more questions than answers.
Juliet had always distanced herself from people she captured, a necessity for her own survival. She never allowed herself to connect with them as human beings. But something about Kate intrigued Juliet. Something about Kate magnified itself a thousand times over and transplanted itself into Juliet's soul. Juliet had long since learned to push her own feelings aside, along with other peoples. But the sheer intensity radiating from the other woman stops Juliet in her tracks. As her eyes locked with Kate's, Juliet finds herself desperate to know everything there is to know about this woman before her.
Juliet knows Kate is courageous, undoubtedly. She also knows that Kate is deeply insecure, distrustful. But she had not expected the magnitude of terror she had seen flash across Kate's eyes. Had not expected it to pierce her own heart.
Juliet isn't sure yet if she thinks Kate is a strong woman. Sure, she survived on her own all those years, with nothing. Survived that plane crash and these weeks on the island. Yet it is the emotional weakness Juliet despises in her. Letting her anger, fear, love, get the better of her time and time over. Sure Kate was capable of clever deception at times, but she had been true to her heart. Always. That was the weakness that caused her downfall.
The idea that Kate is intelligent was debatable. Sitting playing with a child’s toy while her own life at stake was less than clever. Add this bizarre behaviour to the endless list of downright stupid things Kate had done her life, repeating the same mistakes over and over. Kate had proven herself to be self destructive, thoughtless and reckless. And one look at her life, it was plain to see Kate had little, if anything, to show for her choices. Nothing that justified all that stupidity.
But Juliet hesitates to dismiss her entirely as an idiot. Kate had also proven herself resourceful and clever. By her efforts to survive on the island, to ensure the survival of her people. By the years she evaded capture by the marshals. Only to be caught in the end because she was unable to leave a man to die in a car wreck. So perhaps Kate was foolish, but not stupid and certainly but not heartless. In fact it was almost admirable.
Juliet doesn't ask herself the question , if she were the one running for her life, her freedom, for her chance to get off this island, would she have left that man to die in that car? A man who turned her in, a man who betrayed her? Juliet doesn't ask herself, because she isn’t sure she wants to know the answer. Juliet doesn't ask herself just what makes her own life different from Kate's. Kate was hardly the only one who had made stupid choices, who had nothing to show for her life, Kate wasn't the only one imprisoned in this hellish place, the only one who had no hope.
Juliet quickly gives up contemplating the mystery of Kate's courage, intelligence and compassion. Instead Juliet decides that Kate's trump card is her charisma. She won people over easily. No one had suspected at first that she had been the fugitive on that plane. People liked Kate, loved her even. And Juliet wonders why. Is it just the fact that she is beautiful ? Seeing Kate in the flesh- even after weeks stranded on the island, days of imprisonment, starvation and beatings, It remained an undeniable fact- Kate was beautiful. A kind of raw beauty that couldn't be tarnished. But it was something deeper than physical beauty that drew people in, against their will, against their better judgement. Some kind of magic power weaving its way through Juliet's own heart right at that very moment.
What was it about Kate Austen that caused Jack to scream her name, and her name alone, as they tortured him? Surpassing his anger, his own judgements, his undeniable disappointment at her deception ? What was it about Kate that caused Juliet's heart to catch in her throat as her piercing screams for mercy fell over the hushed village?
Then there was that most perplexing thing of all- That damn stupid toy plane that now occupied Kate's entire attention. Juliet recalled the fear she had evoked in Kate's eyes only minutes ago, before Juliet had even laid eyes upon that plane, let alone touched it....
Continued in part 2 http://carlyisnot.livejournal.com/22001.html