LOST Fic : Kate & Juliet, 'Contrition.' 1.7
.7 Back in Darwin yet again.
“What is he talking about?” Kate demanded to know as she appeared in the doorway interrupting you and Jack.
“Nothing. Forget it.” You answered. But she wasn’t buying that.
“Tell me Juliet.” She demanded.
“Not now, it doesn’t matter now, please Kate. Not tonight.” You begged her. What good would it do to tell her that the reason all those people had died in that fire is because you’d made that choice to save her life. That Jack and begged and pleaded with you to give him the keys, and you refused. Things were shaky enough already, and you were afraid the impact that information would have. Afraid she would blame you for all those people dying, afraid she would blame herself. There was absolutely nothing positive that could come out of her knowing the circumstances behind that fire and the death of the others.
“Don’t lie to me. Here you are one minute telling me all about ‘our life’ together, and the next minute you’re outright lying to me.”
“I’ve never lied to you Kate.” You promised her “But there are things you don’t need to know right now, trust me.”
“Tell me” Kate turned and asked Jack, having given up on you for the moment.
You silenced Jack with an icy stare.
Kate picked up the glass of scotch he had been drinking from and threw it at the wall just inches above his head. “TELL ME!” She demanded angrily.
“For Christ sake Juliet just tell her.” Jack instructed you.
“Shut up.” You told him “Just shut up, it has nothing to do with you.”
Kate looked to him, and then back to you, before angrily pushing past and heading for the door.
Panic filled you at the sight of her walking out the door. How easy it would be for her to disappear into the streets and never be seen again. And so you followed her, catching up with her as she left the hotel lobby. Hoping that now it was just the two of you, you might be able to get her to see some sense.
“Tell me the truth.” She asked you without looking at you as you walked side by side along the street.
“Just come back inside, please, forget it, just for tonight.” If the truth was going to come out one day, it sure wouldn’t be while Jack was around to sell his twisted version of events.
“Tell me.” She asked you again.
“No.” You answered. “I can’t. Not now.”
“Then leave me alone.” She told you angrily.
“I can’t do that either, I can’t leave you like this.”
“I’m just going for a walk, to clear my head, I’m not leaving the country.” She told you. And on some level you believed her. She wouldn’t really take off like that in the middle of the night, without goodbye, without any answers about this mysterious thing you and Jack were keeping from her.
But she was impulsive, and reckless, and afraid, and angry. And everything in you told you that you couldn’t allow her out of your sight right now. And so you followed behind her until she turned and angrily ordered you to get lost. “Go back to Jack” She spat at you “Go back to your precious secrets. Hell, go back to your precious united states of America with him and leave me alone. ”
You knew that no words would reach her in that moment. No matter how many times you told her that there was nothing between you and Jack, no matter how many times you begged her to drop it because she really didn’t want to know the truth, it would be a waste of your breath.
And so you reached forward and grabbed her, spinning her around to face you. Hoping that if she looked into your eyes it might just be enough to make her understand.
But Kate angrily pushed you aside, inadvertently pushing you onto the road, into the path of an oncoming car. And that’s the last thing you remembered before everything went black.
~
5 days later- Still in Darwin.
You woke in the hospital, with Kate’s name on your lips. You opened your eyes to find Jack by your bed side.
“She is gone, Juliet.” He told you softly.
Your head was spinning, but you managed to sit up, to pull the IV from your arm. No, Kate couldn’t be gone, not without goodbye, not when you told her you were going to leave everything behind to be with her, not after you let all those people die to save her.
Jack pushed you back onto the bed. “She is gone Juliet. She almost killed you, and left you for dead. She is gone.”
“It was an accident.” You defended her to Jack.
“She left you stranded in a foreign country, lying bleeding on the road side. Face it, she doesn’t give a shit about you. I told you that all along. Kate only cares about Kate.” Jack told you harshly.
“I have to find her.” You told him.
“You won’t find her.”
“She can’t be that far.” You reasoned
“You’ve been unconscious for days, Juliet. She could be anywhere.”
“Why didn’t you stop her? Why didn’t you follow her?” You demand to know.
“Excuse me I was a little bit busy saving your life.” He answered.
“You wanted this all along.” You accused him.
“This?” He asks you, “No I never wanted this. Any of this. Maybe now you finally realise what a waste it was saving her life that day. Maybe now you finally realise I was right about her. That it’s for the best she is gone. You can get on with your life, without Kate.”
“What is he talking about?” Kate demanded to know as she appeared in the doorway interrupting you and Jack.
“Nothing. Forget it.” You answered. But she wasn’t buying that.
“Tell me Juliet.” She demanded.
“Not now, it doesn’t matter now, please Kate. Not tonight.” You begged her. What good would it do to tell her that the reason all those people had died in that fire is because you’d made that choice to save her life. That Jack and begged and pleaded with you to give him the keys, and you refused. Things were shaky enough already, and you were afraid the impact that information would have. Afraid she would blame you for all those people dying, afraid she would blame herself. There was absolutely nothing positive that could come out of her knowing the circumstances behind that fire and the death of the others.
“Don’t lie to me. Here you are one minute telling me all about ‘our life’ together, and the next minute you’re outright lying to me.”
“I’ve never lied to you Kate.” You promised her “But there are things you don’t need to know right now, trust me.”
“Tell me” Kate turned and asked Jack, having given up on you for the moment.
You silenced Jack with an icy stare.
Kate picked up the glass of scotch he had been drinking from and threw it at the wall just inches above his head. “TELL ME!” She demanded angrily.
“For Christ sake Juliet just tell her.” Jack instructed you.
“Shut up.” You told him “Just shut up, it has nothing to do with you.”
Kate looked to him, and then back to you, before angrily pushing past and heading for the door.
Panic filled you at the sight of her walking out the door. How easy it would be for her to disappear into the streets and never be seen again. And so you followed her, catching up with her as she left the hotel lobby. Hoping that now it was just the two of you, you might be able to get her to see some sense.
“Tell me the truth.” She asked you without looking at you as you walked side by side along the street.
“Just come back inside, please, forget it, just for tonight.” If the truth was going to come out one day, it sure wouldn’t be while Jack was around to sell his twisted version of events.
“Tell me.” She asked you again.
“No.” You answered. “I can’t. Not now.”
“Then leave me alone.” She told you angrily.
“I can’t do that either, I can’t leave you like this.”
“I’m just going for a walk, to clear my head, I’m not leaving the country.” She told you. And on some level you believed her. She wouldn’t really take off like that in the middle of the night, without goodbye, without any answers about this mysterious thing you and Jack were keeping from her.
But she was impulsive, and reckless, and afraid, and angry. And everything in you told you that you couldn’t allow her out of your sight right now. And so you followed behind her until she turned and angrily ordered you to get lost. “Go back to Jack” She spat at you “Go back to your precious secrets. Hell, go back to your precious united states of America with him and leave me alone. ”
You knew that no words would reach her in that moment. No matter how many times you told her that there was nothing between you and Jack, no matter how many times you begged her to drop it because she really didn’t want to know the truth, it would be a waste of your breath.
And so you reached forward and grabbed her, spinning her around to face you. Hoping that if she looked into your eyes it might just be enough to make her understand.
But Kate angrily pushed you aside, inadvertently pushing you onto the road, into the path of an oncoming car. And that’s the last thing you remembered before everything went black.
~
5 days later- Still in Darwin.
You woke in the hospital, with Kate’s name on your lips. You opened your eyes to find Jack by your bed side.
“She is gone, Juliet.” He told you softly.
Your head was spinning, but you managed to sit up, to pull the IV from your arm. No, Kate couldn’t be gone, not without goodbye, not when you told her you were going to leave everything behind to be with her, not after you let all those people die to save her.
Jack pushed you back onto the bed. “She is gone Juliet. She almost killed you, and left you for dead. She is gone.”
“It was an accident.” You defended her to Jack.
“She left you stranded in a foreign country, lying bleeding on the road side. Face it, she doesn’t give a shit about you. I told you that all along. Kate only cares about Kate.” Jack told you harshly.
“I have to find her.” You told him.
“You won’t find her.”
“She can’t be that far.” You reasoned
“You’ve been unconscious for days, Juliet. She could be anywhere.”
“Why didn’t you stop her? Why didn’t you follow her?” You demand to know.
“Excuse me I was a little bit busy saving your life.” He answered.
“You wanted this all along.” You accused him.
“This?” He asks you, “No I never wanted this. Any of this. Maybe now you finally realise what a waste it was saving her life that day. Maybe now you finally realise I was right about her. That it’s for the best she is gone. You can get on with your life, without Kate.”