Love's Progress
The TARDIS fell apart as it landed. At least, it felt that way to Donna. It was the most violent landing she had ever experienced, and that was saying something. When the shuddering and jerking finally stopped, the TARDIS was silent and dim, and the effect was spooky and disconcerting. In the unexpected hush, her breath sounded very loud.
She swallowed and ventured, “Did we collapse the universe, then?”
“No,” said the Doctor. “No, it worked exactly as it was supposed to.” Kneeling, he brought the mallet down on a button, and the TARDIS began to hum again, just slightly, a meagre green glow filling the console room. “Exactly as it was supposed to,” he repeated, softly, staring at the button.
Donna paused, regarding him. Most of the time she didn’t actually try to irritate him. But sometimes he needed her to irritate him, to shake him out of things. “Is it always going to be that bumpy?” she whined.
Bingo. He gave her a sour look. “Big picture, Donna. I’ve just done the impossible.”
“Yeah, given me some world-record bruises.” She stood up, dusting off her jeans. “Well. Shall we go get Rose, then?”
The Doctor was staring at the door. He looked as if he suddenly thought this was the worst idea he’d ever had.
“Come on,” she insisted, heading toward the door. “Let’s go.” She turned back to him.
He looked wildly from the door to her, swallowed thickly, tore his hands through his hair. Donna softened, walked over to him. “Come on,” she repeated, gently, holding out her hand.
He took it and stood, then said, hesitantly, “I…”
“It’s going to be fine, you know. She’s going to be so happy to see you, I know it.”
“Her mother’s probably going to slap me across the face.”
“You have that effect on mothers.”
“I never used to,” he protested.
“Let’s go.” She tipped her head toward the door.
“Oh, alright,” he sighed, warring within himself between being terrified and elated.
They opened the TARDIS door and stepped out and looked around.
“Uh-oh,” said the Doctor.
“What?” asked Donna, worriedly.
“It’s not the right world.” He had his head tipped up at the sky. “There were zeppelins in Pete’s world.”
“Maybe they stopped using zeppelins,” Donna suggested. “We’ll just ask.”
“Ask what? ‘Do you know Rose Tyler?’ Oh, this is impossible,” groaned the Doctor.
“No,” she reminded him, sternly. “You’ve done the impossible bit. This is nothing. Excuse me.” She stopped a woman who was passing them by. “Do you know where, uh…” Donna ran out of words, realized she wasn’t sure what she wanted to ask, looked at the Doctor.
He lifted his eyebrows in his “I told you so” gesture.
Then the woman started speaking. “Are you going to finish your sentence?” she demanded.
Donna glared at her. “Well, aren’t you huffy? Hold on, I’m trying to think what-“
“It’s okay. We’re fine,” said the Doctor, cheerfully, taking Donna’s hand and pulling her away.
“But we’re not--!” protested Donna. “What are you-What are you doing?” she hissed at him, as he led her directly back to the TARDIS.
“Wrong universe,” he answered, shortly.
“How do you know?”
“Because she was speaking French.”
“She was? It didn’t sound like French-“
“Because the TARDIS translated for you,” he explained, pushing open the TARDIS door for her. “Now, let’s go.”
“Maybe we’re in Paris-“
“Big Ben is right over there-“
“Maybe she was a French tourist-“
“Every sign is in French.”
Donna looked over her shoulder, fascinated. “Really? It all looks like-“
“The TARDIS,” he reminded her, impatiently. “She translates. This is the wrong universe. This is the universe where Napoleon won Waterloo.”
Donna wrinkled her nose as she stepped into the TARDIS. “Rose is lucky she didn’t get stuck in this universe. That’s all the world needs, more French people.”
The Doctor had already run back to the controls, was making adjustments. “Okay,” he said, after a moment, peering at the monitor with intense concentration. “I think this is right.”
“So,” said Donna, jovially, this time bracing herself. “Off to get Rose.”
It was another bumpy ride, and another quick foray into the universe they ended up in, another quick trip back to the TARDIS.
“Latin,” announced the Doctor, in a clipped fashion, while he re-evaluated the control panel. “Rome never fell.”
“Ah,” responded Donna, and then, “Off to get Rose, now.”
After the next bumpy landing, the Doctor and Donna stepped out of the TARDIS and found themselves watching a human who was scurrying away from a large, lizard-looking creature, who abruptly turned its attention to the new arrivals.
Donna’s eyes widened in astonishment. “Is that a--?”
“Back in the TARDIS,” said the Doctor, grimly, pulling her back inside.
“What the hell was that world?”
“Dinosaurs never went extinct. Not the best alternate universe for humans, as you can imagine.” The Doctor flipped controls around, not looking anymore as if he were doing it with any purpose. She wondered if he was doing things randomly now, in desperation. She didn’t like that idea, but didn’t know what to do to fix what was going on.
“Off to get Rose,” she smiled, gamely.
The Doctor gave her a baleful look before flipping the last lever.
One more bumpy landing. No dinosaurs to be seen. But the women were all dressed in suits with trousers and ties, while the men were all wearing dresses.
The Doctor didn’t say a word. He turned back into the TARDIS and walked over to the controls and stood staring down at them.
Donna closed the door behind her and watched him for a moment. “Not Rose’s world, I guess,” she ventured, at last. The Doctor didn’t stop frowning at his ship. “Although Jack would absolutely love it.” She didn’t get a chuckle. Not any indication that he’d heard her. “Don’t you think?” she prompted, as she walked toward the controls.
He scrubbed his hands over his face, then looked back down. “I don’t think it’s going to work, Donna,” he said, so softly she had to duck her head to hear it.
Donna hesitated. “Don’t say th-“
“She won’t let me go,” he said. “She won’t let me bloody go there.” He suddenly, savagely, kicked at the base of the controls. The TARDIS made a brief noise that sounded like brakes squealing, a noise Donna had never heard the ship make before. “No!” he shouted, in reaction, Donna supposed, to the squeal. “You wouldn’t leave me alone! Always, everywhere I went, there was Rose’s bedroom and the garden and you showed Donna where Rose’s mug was and you told her to play Ian Drury and now you won’t let me go? After all that!”
Donna stared at him. The TARDIS was silent. If the Doctor and his ship were communicating, then Donna was completely excluded from the conversation. The Doctor, hands tearing through his hair, paced along the floor.
“Is she saying anything?” Donna asked, after a moment.
“She says she’s trying,” he muttered, sounding unconvinced.
“I’m sure she is. Look how long it took you to get the equations right. You think she can just drop through to the right alternate universe? I mean, how many are there? Hardly surprising she wouldn’t get it right on the first, or second, or third, or fourth time.”
The light in the TARDIS grew a tad brighter.
The Doctor sighed. “So she’s trying. There are billions of alternative universes out there, Donna. Maybe more than that. How many do you think we ought to visit before we give up?”
“Before we give up?” she shrieked at him, deliberately using the tone of voice that she knew would make him cringe. “Is that what you just said? Give up?”
“Donna-“
She stalked over to him, stood right in front of him. “You can get Rose back, but you have to visit a few alternate universes first, and that’s too much for you? Four years of sulking-“
“Time Lords don’t-“
“-and two months of not eating and not sleeping and doing nothing but scribbling all over every blank surface while you forced me to live with my mum-“ she poked at his chest-“and now you’re giving up because we got the wrong universe a couple of times?”
He looked down at her for a second. “Do you think we’ll find the right one?” he asked, finally.
Sometimes, she thought, he needed companions to stop him. And sometimes he needed them to keep him going. Because there were times when, underneath all that arrogance, his faith in himself could wear so dangerously thin. She knew, instinctively, that that was partly what Rose had done for him: just, simply, believed in him.
She reached for his hand, squeezed it, smiled. “Yes. Now pull the lever. Off to get Rose.”
And so it went, each pull of the lever taking them to a new-wrong--universe. There was the one where there were sentient trees (“Cheem!” the Doctor had exclaimed delightedly before just dodging a liana. It had taken forever to get the leaves out of her hair after that one); the one where they’d thought they might have it right, what with the zeppelins above, but it turned out semaphore was the primary means of long-distance communication; and the one where the Maori had defeated the British, taken over the Empire, and were now ruling the planet (They’d keyed on to that one after being greeted by a particularly intimidating haka).
Donna finally decided it might be time to pause and perhaps re-do a bit of math after they visited a version of Earth ruled by anthropomorphized primates. “Not just a movie, then?” she asked as he hastily spun dials and flicked levers on the console.
“Not just a movie, or a novel. How did Boulle know that it existed, I wonder?” he mused once they were safely dematerialized. “You think he might have come from there?”
The Doctor ignored her suggestion that they stop to take a breath, that perhaps the equations might need a bit of work, and instead continued to flip levers and spin dials as he programmed in a new set of coordinates. He was determined, now-he knew he wasn’t destroying space and time every time he punched into a new world, and the slim hope he’d held when the madness started had blossomed into an all-consuming belief. They would find Rose’s universe; it was just going to take a little bit of time. And he had time.
Donna sighed; they’d done this often enough now that she knew the exact sequence of his actions, knew that he’d developed a routine and was clinging to it like a superstitious footballer. The good news was that everyone, the TARDIS included, seemed to be getting the hang of the universe-hopping as they gained more experience. As the Doctor viciously pushed and pulled at the bicycle pump, she would sit on the captain’s chair; as he tweaked the green glass sphere, she would reach out with her hands and grab at the arms. He would reach out his hand, his long fingers resting delicately on the final lever; and she would take her cue. “Off to get, Rose,” she would say, injecting levity into her voice as he would firmly pull the handle towards him. The TARDIS would lurch and buckle, and then all would fall silent once more as they materialised in yet another new universe.
“Ten quid says it’s wrong,” Donna said about twenty universes in, standing and brushing herself off.
“What?” The Doctor’s voice rose in an eerie echo of the first time she’d met him. She stifled a grin.
“I’ve yet to see the right one, and I could do with some cash when we’re back in our universe. Ten quid.”
“You expect me to take a bet when you don’t have the money to back it up?” His voice was still rich with disbelief.
“I won’t need it. Now prove me wrong, loverboy.” She sauntered down the walkway, pausing expectantly by the door. He sniffed, walking towards her with his hands stuffed in his pockets.
“Some companion you are.”
“Get over yourself and get your arse outside.” She leaned in and bumped her elbow against him, suppressing a grin. They walked outside, the door clicking softly shut behind them as the console room fell into silence.
The silence was violently broken minutes later, the door flying open violently, two bodies tumbling into the room. Donna slammed the door shut behind her as the Doctor sprinted up the ramp, hastily throwing levers before hitting the console with a mallet to dematerialise the ship as fast as possible.
Donna was still panting against the door when the Doctor stood and looked at her.
“Well. Congratulations to Mr. Dodgson for getting that bit so right. What was it with authors in that era-did I miss something about them hopping universes? Maybe it was the Absinthe. Powerful stuff that, before it became illegal.” The Doctor was rambling, working the adrenaline-or the Gallifreyan equivalent-out of his system.
“Thought it was Carroll as wrote about Alice?” Donna said, slowly walking up the ramp.
“Same bloke-Lewis Carroll was his nom de plume. Can’t imagine why-Charles Dodgson was a perfectly fine name.” The Doctor remained leaning against the console as Donna stopped in front of him.
He’d clearly been shaken by their brief encounter with the Queen of Hearts; he’d seemed absolutely intrigued by the croquet match, and it was just bad luck that they had landed in the middle of it. The Doctor’s enthusiasm for the croquet had not been appreciated. The Queen had been quite serious when she roared “Off with their heads” and they’d just made it to the TARDIS in advance of her playing-card guards. Donna worried that the guards might actually have left a mark on the exterior of the TARDIS.
“Doctor.”
He avoided her gaze, glancing down at the console and idly playing with the hedgehog.
Uh-oh, she thought. Maybe time for another pep talk. “We’re going to find it. We’re going to find her.” Donna’s voice was firm, confident, and very matter-of-fact.
“Before or after you die of old age?” he said, morbid humour colouring his voice as he raised his gaze to hers.
“Doesn’t matter,” she replied briskly. “You’ve worked all this out; you’re going to do it. Provided you don’t feel sorry for yourself after every time we land in the wrong spot.”
“You were almost decapitated by the Knave of Hearts!”
“You should have run faster.”
“I should have-You were the one lollygagging along! I pulled you most of the way!”
“You were busy ogling Alice. What is it with you and blondes?”
The Doctor stood straight, his eyes blazing. “I was attempting to get us out of there in one piece so I could try to get us to the right spot.”
Donna grinned. “Good! Glad to hear it. Let’s go, then!”
The Doctor stepped back, confused by Donna’s change in attitude.
“Don’t stand there like a mackerel-set the coordinates and let’s go!” Donna thumped her hand against the console. “No more self pity. No more doubt. Got it?”
The Doctor grinned slowly. “Got it.”
She lost track of how many more universes they visited. She really should have brought a journal into the console room so she could jot them down, but there was never time in-between stops during what she thought of as the ‘workday.’ The routine continued for an indeterminate amount of time: Materialise, step outside, check for zeppelins; gawp at whatever was different about the universe before rushing back inside and dematerialising. Lather, rinse, repeat-it was almost hypnotising, and she was grateful for the short breaks he’d impatiently grant her for naps and, periodically, a proper night’s sleep.
She was just stumbling out into the console room after one of her naps when she thought to ask, “How long have we been at this?”
He stilled, his hand over one of the controls, as he considered her question. “Ah...three weeks? No! Four.” He grinned at her, his hair standing crazily on end. Once he’d realized she’d not humour any more bouts of his self-pity or doubt, and knew she was in it for the long haul, he’d relaxed and begun to enjoy the adventure, chattering like a magpie every time he’d reset their coordinates. Stories about Rose, little vignettes of their adventures, would fill the console room, and she realized she’d learned more about the girl in the time they’d been jumping universes than she had in all of the time she’d been travelling with him.
Their latest visit had been to a version of Earth where giraffes had evolved as the dominant species. She’d laughed at first, the height and scale of the buildings seeming ludicrous as they stepped out and began to tentatively explore.
“Giraffes?”
“Why not? You’re an ape,” he Doctor retorted.
“Snob,” she muttered under her breath.
It had been a bit of a surprise when one of the large creatures had shied upon seeing them; it seemed humans in this universe were the equivalent of mice in hers. They raced back to the TARDIS, trying to avoid being swatted down as vermin, and Donna couldn’t stop laughing as they dematerialised yet again from the wrong universe.
“They looked a bit shifty, didn’t they?” she gasped out, collapsed on the captain’s chair as the Doctor moved gracefully around the time rotor. He paused a moment before answering her, splaying across the console as he reached for something with his foot whilst simultaneously hitting a button and a lever before standing back up. That was new.
“It’s the little horn things,” he responded, a grin gracing his lips as he turned around to face Donna.
“It is the little horn thingies!” she retorted.
He shook his head, and she noticed he had the fingers of his left hand wrapped around the hedgehog. She grinned. “Do I have time for a cuppa before we head off to the next variation of my reality?”
“Oh, I reckon so. Going to try something new this time ‘round. Don’t be too long-and I’d love a cuppa when you come back.”
She stood, looking him up and down. “Doesn’t look like your legs or arms are broken-shift and get it yourself.” Donna grinned and walked out of the room.
He laughed and moved to join her for some tea. They spent an enjoyable half-hour, the Doctor regaling Donna with yet more tales of his travels, and she was still laughing when they returned once more to the console room. The Doctor moved quickly to the console, stopping in his usual spot by the final lever, and he was still grinning as he turned to Donna.
“You ready, then?”
She stopped next to him. “Off to get Rose.”
He winked as he pulled the lever. The reaction was immediate, the TARDIS shifting direction violently. Their sudden deceleration was jarring, and Donna found herself sprawled on the floor, looking up at the ceiling of the room. She felt the Doctor stir beside her, and she groaned as she sat up.
“What’d you do? Forget to disengage the hand brake?” She rubbed the back of her head as the Doctor stood and bounded back to the console.
“That was a bit of a change of pace, wasn’t it?” He flicked some levers and then thwacked a button. “Well, let’s see what wonders await us today.” His voice was bright, and he paused at the top of the ramp. “You just going to sit there all day? C’mon!”
Donna gave another groan, and stood, moving to join him. He extended his hand, and she reached down to take it. “Alright. But don’t think your cute-and-charming act is going to keep me from telling you what a rubbish driver you are.”
The Doctor looked wounded, and turned to her as he rested his hand on the door handle. “I am not rubbish. I’m better than you are, at any rate.” He turned the handle and opened the door.
They stepped out into bright sunshine as Donna responded. “You only let me drive one time! And even then you set all the buttons! Honestly-just admit you’re a terrible driver already!” She was jerked to a stop by a tug from the Doctor’s hand. “What now?” She turned, and found him standing stock still, staring at the sky.
“We’ve done it,” he whispered, as though he couldn’t quite believe it.
She looked up. The sky was a beautiful clear blue, and a few different-sized zeppelins could be seen floating lazily. The light had a soft, golden quality to it, and she looked back down to the Doctor. “Right. Let’s go find her.” Donna tugged on the Doctor’s hand, but he refused to move.
“What if she’s moved on? What if...what if we’re too late?” His voice had taken on an uncertain note, and Donna could see fear in his eyes.
She sighed, yanking her hand out of his grasp. “Only one way to find out. Standing there, worrying yourself to death about it, isn’t going to solve the problem.” She walked away from him, looking for an abandoned paper. The Doctor trailed after her reluctantly. They were in a park, and it was only a matter of minutes before they reached the street; a quick look left, then right, and Donna set off determinedly in search of a newsagents.
“This is a bad idea,” the Doctor half-heartedly said as they walked briskly along.
“Don’t chicken out now,” Donna said bracingly. They reached the end of the block, and she took a quick left. She skidded to a halt after another minute of walking, and turned back to the Doctor. “I’m going to go find the date. You’re welcome to come along, but you’d best work out that you wanted this badly enough to chance ripping the universe apart. From what you’ve told me, Rose would be more than a little put out if you turned coward at this point in the game.” She turned and entered the small shop she’d found.
The Doctor stood, sulking, on the street-she could see him through the window as she browsed casually through the magazines. She moved on to the drinks case, making a frown as though unable to find what she was looking for, and briefly chatted up the young man behind the counter before leaving empty-handed.
“You done sulking, then?”
“Time Lords don’t sulk.”
“What do you call what you’re doing then? I call it sulking. Get over it.”
The Doctor turned to her, his face stony. “I am not sulking,” he bit out, before pivoting on his heel to return to the TARDIS.
“Bollocks. See if I tell you when we are.” She followed him down the street, hurrying to keep up with his long strides.
They continued on to the park in silence, until finally Donna couldn’t take it any more.
“Alien boy!” She stopped and stood, arms crossed stubbornly.
The Doctor stopped; she saw him set his shoulders before turning to her. “What?”
“We’re in the right year.”
The Doctor paled before visibly relaxing.
“Can’t help you on Torchwood, though.”
He slowly smiled. “Oh, I can take care of that easily enough. You need anything from the TARDIS?”
“Don’t have any money, do I?”
“No Queen over here-your money wouldn’t be any good.” He grinned. “Don’t suppose you found out where we were?”
“How daft d’you think I am? Got used to asking for directions travelling with you, haven’t I? We’re about four blocks south of the River in Southwark.”
He reached down and took her hand. “You, Donna Noble, are brilliant. Up for a walk?”
“If it gets us to Rose? I’ll walk as far as you want. Just don’t think I’ll skip lunch.” He squeezed her hand, and set off to their right. She pulled him to a stop. “River’s that way.” She pointed in the opposite direction.
“I knew that. Just testing you.”
Donna rolled her eyes as they set off in the correct direction.
As they walked across the city, she noted that, barring the zeppelins, there wasn’t much difference between her London and Rose’s. The biggest differences she found were the lack of the Gherkin, and the fact that the Tower was an office and shopping complex. “President, remember?” the Doctor had said as she’d gawped. The day held fine, and it was almost two hours later that they arrived at their destination.
“Are you kidding me?” Donna sat heavily on a bench at a bus stop. The Doctor was staring up at a skyscraper, his hands in his pockets. “Isn’t this the same bloody building as you showed me back home?”
“Identical, in fact.”
“That’s got to be some kind of mulitversal joke.”
He looked back to her, his face serious. “It wasn’t very funny then.”
She sobered, and stood. “Nope, I imagine not. You just going to stare at it then? Or are we going to go in there and find your woman?”
The Doctor blushed. “She’s...I wouldn’t say...Rose isn’t...”
“She is, and you know it. Let’s go let her know we’re here.” Donna stepped forward, only to be jerked back by the Doctor.
“Bus,” he said simply. The red double-decker rumbled by, and they cautiously looked both ways before crossing the street.
The entrance to the skyscraper was average-looking: multiple sets of glass doors, their brass work gleaming, led into a stark granite lobby. A guard was seated behind the desk, and looked at them inquiringly. The Doctor froze.
Donna smiled, and walked up to the desk. “We’re looking for Rose Tyler.”
The guard did not smile back. “And who does she work for?”
“Torchwood,” Donna said confidently.
“Have you an appointment with Torchwood?”
“Ah, no. We’re old friends unexpectedly in town.”
The guard’s look became more severe. “Whom may I say is visiting?”
The Doctor shook himself from his stupor. “Tell her it’s the Doctor.”
“The Doctor?”
“That’s it. Just the Doctor.” The Doctor’s smile was tight around the edges, Donna noticed. She gave the guard her best don’t-mess-with-me look as he began to dial a number.
He whispered into the phone, and she noted a look of surprise cross his face before he rang off. He placed a book in front of them, and set a pen delicately in front of the Doctor. “If you could just sign in? Someone will be down shortly.” His tone of voice had even changed, and she had to fight down a satisfied snort.
The Doctor scrawled illegibly before stalking over to the seating area; she signed her name, giving the guard a brief insincere smile before moving to join the Doctor. He looked terrified, pacing back and forth in front of the chairs and sofa. Donna sat down with a sigh. “My feet are killing me. Think you can scare up some money so we could taxi back? Or at least use the bus?”
He ignored her and continued pacing, agitatedly. She sighed.
“You know that cute-and-charming act you do? It’s pretty decent. Now’d be the time to use it.”
He did not even glance in her direction.
“Wearing a hole in the floor’s not going to change things,” she snapped. “They’ll be down when they’re down. Until then, sit down already!”
He stopped, looked at her; seemed prepared to say something before changing his mind and sitting down next to her. “What if she doesn’t want to see me? What if--?”
“Shut it with the ‘what if’s’ already! You’re here. You’ll find out soon enough!”
The two of them lapsed into silence and continued to wait.
She swallowed and ventured, “Did we collapse the universe, then?”
“No,” said the Doctor. “No, it worked exactly as it was supposed to.” Kneeling, he brought the mallet down on a button, and the TARDIS began to hum again, just slightly, a meagre green glow filling the console room. “Exactly as it was supposed to,” he repeated, softly, staring at the button.
Donna paused, regarding him. Most of the time she didn’t actually try to irritate him. But sometimes he needed her to irritate him, to shake him out of things. “Is it always going to be that bumpy?” she whined.
Bingo. He gave her a sour look. “Big picture, Donna. I’ve just done the impossible.”
“Yeah, given me some world-record bruises.” She stood up, dusting off her jeans. “Well. Shall we go get Rose, then?”
The Doctor was staring at the door. He looked as if he suddenly thought this was the worst idea he’d ever had.
“Come on,” she insisted, heading toward the door. “Let’s go.” She turned back to him.
He looked wildly from the door to her, swallowed thickly, tore his hands through his hair. Donna softened, walked over to him. “Come on,” she repeated, gently, holding out her hand.
He took it and stood, then said, hesitantly, “I…”
“It’s going to be fine, you know. She’s going to be so happy to see you, I know it.”
“Her mother’s probably going to slap me across the face.”
“You have that effect on mothers.”
“I never used to,” he protested.
“Let’s go.” She tipped her head toward the door.
“Oh, alright,” he sighed, warring within himself between being terrified and elated.
They opened the TARDIS door and stepped out and looked around.
“Uh-oh,” said the Doctor.
“What?” asked Donna, worriedly.
“It’s not the right world.” He had his head tipped up at the sky. “There were zeppelins in Pete’s world.”
“Maybe they stopped using zeppelins,” Donna suggested. “We’ll just ask.”
“Ask what? ‘Do you know Rose Tyler?’ Oh, this is impossible,” groaned the Doctor.
“No,” she reminded him, sternly. “You’ve done the impossible bit. This is nothing. Excuse me.” She stopped a woman who was passing them by. “Do you know where, uh…” Donna ran out of words, realized she wasn’t sure what she wanted to ask, looked at the Doctor.
He lifted his eyebrows in his “I told you so” gesture.
Then the woman started speaking. “Are you going to finish your sentence?” she demanded.
Donna glared at her. “Well, aren’t you huffy? Hold on, I’m trying to think what-“
“It’s okay. We’re fine,” said the Doctor, cheerfully, taking Donna’s hand and pulling her away.
“But we’re not--!” protested Donna. “What are you-What are you doing?” she hissed at him, as he led her directly back to the TARDIS.
“Wrong universe,” he answered, shortly.
“How do you know?”
“Because she was speaking French.”
“She was? It didn’t sound like French-“
“Because the TARDIS translated for you,” he explained, pushing open the TARDIS door for her. “Now, let’s go.”
“Maybe we’re in Paris-“
“Big Ben is right over there-“
“Maybe she was a French tourist-“
“Every sign is in French.”
Donna looked over her shoulder, fascinated. “Really? It all looks like-“
“The TARDIS,” he reminded her, impatiently. “She translates. This is the wrong universe. This is the universe where Napoleon won Waterloo.”
Donna wrinkled her nose as she stepped into the TARDIS. “Rose is lucky she didn’t get stuck in this universe. That’s all the world needs, more French people.”
The Doctor had already run back to the controls, was making adjustments. “Okay,” he said, after a moment, peering at the monitor with intense concentration. “I think this is right.”
“So,” said Donna, jovially, this time bracing herself. “Off to get Rose.”
It was another bumpy ride, and another quick foray into the universe they ended up in, another quick trip back to the TARDIS.
“Latin,” announced the Doctor, in a clipped fashion, while he re-evaluated the control panel. “Rome never fell.”
“Ah,” responded Donna, and then, “Off to get Rose, now.”
After the next bumpy landing, the Doctor and Donna stepped out of the TARDIS and found themselves watching a human who was scurrying away from a large, lizard-looking creature, who abruptly turned its attention to the new arrivals.
Donna’s eyes widened in astonishment. “Is that a--?”
“Back in the TARDIS,” said the Doctor, grimly, pulling her back inside.
“What the hell was that world?”
“Dinosaurs never went extinct. Not the best alternate universe for humans, as you can imagine.” The Doctor flipped controls around, not looking anymore as if he were doing it with any purpose. She wondered if he was doing things randomly now, in desperation. She didn’t like that idea, but didn’t know what to do to fix what was going on.
“Off to get Rose,” she smiled, gamely.
The Doctor gave her a baleful look before flipping the last lever.
One more bumpy landing. No dinosaurs to be seen. But the women were all dressed in suits with trousers and ties, while the men were all wearing dresses.
The Doctor didn’t say a word. He turned back into the TARDIS and walked over to the controls and stood staring down at them.
Donna closed the door behind her and watched him for a moment. “Not Rose’s world, I guess,” she ventured, at last. The Doctor didn’t stop frowning at his ship. “Although Jack would absolutely love it.” She didn’t get a chuckle. Not any indication that he’d heard her. “Don’t you think?” she prompted, as she walked toward the controls.
He scrubbed his hands over his face, then looked back down. “I don’t think it’s going to work, Donna,” he said, so softly she had to duck her head to hear it.
Donna hesitated. “Don’t say th-“
“She won’t let me go,” he said. “She won’t let me bloody go there.” He suddenly, savagely, kicked at the base of the controls. The TARDIS made a brief noise that sounded like brakes squealing, a noise Donna had never heard the ship make before. “No!” he shouted, in reaction, Donna supposed, to the squeal. “You wouldn’t leave me alone! Always, everywhere I went, there was Rose’s bedroom and the garden and you showed Donna where Rose’s mug was and you told her to play Ian Drury and now you won’t let me go? After all that!”
Donna stared at him. The TARDIS was silent. If the Doctor and his ship were communicating, then Donna was completely excluded from the conversation. The Doctor, hands tearing through his hair, paced along the floor.
“Is she saying anything?” Donna asked, after a moment.
“She says she’s trying,” he muttered, sounding unconvinced.
“I’m sure she is. Look how long it took you to get the equations right. You think she can just drop through to the right alternate universe? I mean, how many are there? Hardly surprising she wouldn’t get it right on the first, or second, or third, or fourth time.”
The light in the TARDIS grew a tad brighter.
The Doctor sighed. “So she’s trying. There are billions of alternative universes out there, Donna. Maybe more than that. How many do you think we ought to visit before we give up?”
“Before we give up?” she shrieked at him, deliberately using the tone of voice that she knew would make him cringe. “Is that what you just said? Give up?”
“Donna-“
She stalked over to him, stood right in front of him. “You can get Rose back, but you have to visit a few alternate universes first, and that’s too much for you? Four years of sulking-“
“Time Lords don’t-“
“-and two months of not eating and not sleeping and doing nothing but scribbling all over every blank surface while you forced me to live with my mum-“ she poked at his chest-“and now you’re giving up because we got the wrong universe a couple of times?”
He looked down at her for a second. “Do you think we’ll find the right one?” he asked, finally.
Sometimes, she thought, he needed companions to stop him. And sometimes he needed them to keep him going. Because there were times when, underneath all that arrogance, his faith in himself could wear so dangerously thin. She knew, instinctively, that that was partly what Rose had done for him: just, simply, believed in him.
She reached for his hand, squeezed it, smiled. “Yes. Now pull the lever. Off to get Rose.”
And so it went, each pull of the lever taking them to a new-wrong--universe. There was the one where there were sentient trees (“Cheem!” the Doctor had exclaimed delightedly before just dodging a liana. It had taken forever to get the leaves out of her hair after that one); the one where they’d thought they might have it right, what with the zeppelins above, but it turned out semaphore was the primary means of long-distance communication; and the one where the Maori had defeated the British, taken over the Empire, and were now ruling the planet (They’d keyed on to that one after being greeted by a particularly intimidating haka).
Donna finally decided it might be time to pause and perhaps re-do a bit of math after they visited a version of Earth ruled by anthropomorphized primates. “Not just a movie, then?” she asked as he hastily spun dials and flicked levers on the console.
“Not just a movie, or a novel. How did Boulle know that it existed, I wonder?” he mused once they were safely dematerialized. “You think he might have come from there?”
The Doctor ignored her suggestion that they stop to take a breath, that perhaps the equations might need a bit of work, and instead continued to flip levers and spin dials as he programmed in a new set of coordinates. He was determined, now-he knew he wasn’t destroying space and time every time he punched into a new world, and the slim hope he’d held when the madness started had blossomed into an all-consuming belief. They would find Rose’s universe; it was just going to take a little bit of time. And he had time.
Donna sighed; they’d done this often enough now that she knew the exact sequence of his actions, knew that he’d developed a routine and was clinging to it like a superstitious footballer. The good news was that everyone, the TARDIS included, seemed to be getting the hang of the universe-hopping as they gained more experience. As the Doctor viciously pushed and pulled at the bicycle pump, she would sit on the captain’s chair; as he tweaked the green glass sphere, she would reach out with her hands and grab at the arms. He would reach out his hand, his long fingers resting delicately on the final lever; and she would take her cue. “Off to get, Rose,” she would say, injecting levity into her voice as he would firmly pull the handle towards him. The TARDIS would lurch and buckle, and then all would fall silent once more as they materialised in yet another new universe.
“Ten quid says it’s wrong,” Donna said about twenty universes in, standing and brushing herself off.
“What?” The Doctor’s voice rose in an eerie echo of the first time she’d met him. She stifled a grin.
“I’ve yet to see the right one, and I could do with some cash when we’re back in our universe. Ten quid.”
“You expect me to take a bet when you don’t have the money to back it up?” His voice was still rich with disbelief.
“I won’t need it. Now prove me wrong, loverboy.” She sauntered down the walkway, pausing expectantly by the door. He sniffed, walking towards her with his hands stuffed in his pockets.
“Some companion you are.”
“Get over yourself and get your arse outside.” She leaned in and bumped her elbow against him, suppressing a grin. They walked outside, the door clicking softly shut behind them as the console room fell into silence.
The silence was violently broken minutes later, the door flying open violently, two bodies tumbling into the room. Donna slammed the door shut behind her as the Doctor sprinted up the ramp, hastily throwing levers before hitting the console with a mallet to dematerialise the ship as fast as possible.
Donna was still panting against the door when the Doctor stood and looked at her.
“Well. Congratulations to Mr. Dodgson for getting that bit so right. What was it with authors in that era-did I miss something about them hopping universes? Maybe it was the Absinthe. Powerful stuff that, before it became illegal.” The Doctor was rambling, working the adrenaline-or the Gallifreyan equivalent-out of his system.
“Thought it was Carroll as wrote about Alice?” Donna said, slowly walking up the ramp.
“Same bloke-Lewis Carroll was his nom de plume. Can’t imagine why-Charles Dodgson was a perfectly fine name.” The Doctor remained leaning against the console as Donna stopped in front of him.
He’d clearly been shaken by their brief encounter with the Queen of Hearts; he’d seemed absolutely intrigued by the croquet match, and it was just bad luck that they had landed in the middle of it. The Doctor’s enthusiasm for the croquet had not been appreciated. The Queen had been quite serious when she roared “Off with their heads” and they’d just made it to the TARDIS in advance of her playing-card guards. Donna worried that the guards might actually have left a mark on the exterior of the TARDIS.
“Doctor.”
He avoided her gaze, glancing down at the console and idly playing with the hedgehog.
Uh-oh, she thought. Maybe time for another pep talk. “We’re going to find it. We’re going to find her.” Donna’s voice was firm, confident, and very matter-of-fact.
“Before or after you die of old age?” he said, morbid humour colouring his voice as he raised his gaze to hers.
“Doesn’t matter,” she replied briskly. “You’ve worked all this out; you’re going to do it. Provided you don’t feel sorry for yourself after every time we land in the wrong spot.”
“You were almost decapitated by the Knave of Hearts!”
“You should have run faster.”
“I should have-You were the one lollygagging along! I pulled you most of the way!”
“You were busy ogling Alice. What is it with you and blondes?”
The Doctor stood straight, his eyes blazing. “I was attempting to get us out of there in one piece so I could try to get us to the right spot.”
Donna grinned. “Good! Glad to hear it. Let’s go, then!”
The Doctor stepped back, confused by Donna’s change in attitude.
“Don’t stand there like a mackerel-set the coordinates and let’s go!” Donna thumped her hand against the console. “No more self pity. No more doubt. Got it?”
The Doctor grinned slowly. “Got it.”
She lost track of how many more universes they visited. She really should have brought a journal into the console room so she could jot them down, but there was never time in-between stops during what she thought of as the ‘workday.’ The routine continued for an indeterminate amount of time: Materialise, step outside, check for zeppelins; gawp at whatever was different about the universe before rushing back inside and dematerialising. Lather, rinse, repeat-it was almost hypnotising, and she was grateful for the short breaks he’d impatiently grant her for naps and, periodically, a proper night’s sleep.
She was just stumbling out into the console room after one of her naps when she thought to ask, “How long have we been at this?”
He stilled, his hand over one of the controls, as he considered her question. “Ah...three weeks? No! Four.” He grinned at her, his hair standing crazily on end. Once he’d realized she’d not humour any more bouts of his self-pity or doubt, and knew she was in it for the long haul, he’d relaxed and begun to enjoy the adventure, chattering like a magpie every time he’d reset their coordinates. Stories about Rose, little vignettes of their adventures, would fill the console room, and she realized she’d learned more about the girl in the time they’d been jumping universes than she had in all of the time she’d been travelling with him.
Their latest visit had been to a version of Earth where giraffes had evolved as the dominant species. She’d laughed at first, the height and scale of the buildings seeming ludicrous as they stepped out and began to tentatively explore.
“Giraffes?”
“Why not? You’re an ape,” he Doctor retorted.
“Snob,” she muttered under her breath.
It had been a bit of a surprise when one of the large creatures had shied upon seeing them; it seemed humans in this universe were the equivalent of mice in hers. They raced back to the TARDIS, trying to avoid being swatted down as vermin, and Donna couldn’t stop laughing as they dematerialised yet again from the wrong universe.
“They looked a bit shifty, didn’t they?” she gasped out, collapsed on the captain’s chair as the Doctor moved gracefully around the time rotor. He paused a moment before answering her, splaying across the console as he reached for something with his foot whilst simultaneously hitting a button and a lever before standing back up. That was new.
“It’s the little horn things,” he responded, a grin gracing his lips as he turned around to face Donna.
“It is the little horn thingies!” she retorted.
He shook his head, and she noticed he had the fingers of his left hand wrapped around the hedgehog. She grinned. “Do I have time for a cuppa before we head off to the next variation of my reality?”
“Oh, I reckon so. Going to try something new this time ‘round. Don’t be too long-and I’d love a cuppa when you come back.”
She stood, looking him up and down. “Doesn’t look like your legs or arms are broken-shift and get it yourself.” Donna grinned and walked out of the room.
He laughed and moved to join her for some tea. They spent an enjoyable half-hour, the Doctor regaling Donna with yet more tales of his travels, and she was still laughing when they returned once more to the console room. The Doctor moved quickly to the console, stopping in his usual spot by the final lever, and he was still grinning as he turned to Donna.
“You ready, then?”
She stopped next to him. “Off to get Rose.”
He winked as he pulled the lever. The reaction was immediate, the TARDIS shifting direction violently. Their sudden deceleration was jarring, and Donna found herself sprawled on the floor, looking up at the ceiling of the room. She felt the Doctor stir beside her, and she groaned as she sat up.
“What’d you do? Forget to disengage the hand brake?” She rubbed the back of her head as the Doctor stood and bounded back to the console.
“That was a bit of a change of pace, wasn’t it?” He flicked some levers and then thwacked a button. “Well, let’s see what wonders await us today.” His voice was bright, and he paused at the top of the ramp. “You just going to sit there all day? C’mon!”
Donna gave another groan, and stood, moving to join him. He extended his hand, and she reached down to take it. “Alright. But don’t think your cute-and-charming act is going to keep me from telling you what a rubbish driver you are.”
The Doctor looked wounded, and turned to her as he rested his hand on the door handle. “I am not rubbish. I’m better than you are, at any rate.” He turned the handle and opened the door.
They stepped out into bright sunshine as Donna responded. “You only let me drive one time! And even then you set all the buttons! Honestly-just admit you’re a terrible driver already!” She was jerked to a stop by a tug from the Doctor’s hand. “What now?” She turned, and found him standing stock still, staring at the sky.
“We’ve done it,” he whispered, as though he couldn’t quite believe it.
She looked up. The sky was a beautiful clear blue, and a few different-sized zeppelins could be seen floating lazily. The light had a soft, golden quality to it, and she looked back down to the Doctor. “Right. Let’s go find her.” Donna tugged on the Doctor’s hand, but he refused to move.
“What if she’s moved on? What if...what if we’re too late?” His voice had taken on an uncertain note, and Donna could see fear in his eyes.
She sighed, yanking her hand out of his grasp. “Only one way to find out. Standing there, worrying yourself to death about it, isn’t going to solve the problem.” She walked away from him, looking for an abandoned paper. The Doctor trailed after her reluctantly. They were in a park, and it was only a matter of minutes before they reached the street; a quick look left, then right, and Donna set off determinedly in search of a newsagents.
“This is a bad idea,” the Doctor half-heartedly said as they walked briskly along.
“Don’t chicken out now,” Donna said bracingly. They reached the end of the block, and she took a quick left. She skidded to a halt after another minute of walking, and turned back to the Doctor. “I’m going to go find the date. You’re welcome to come along, but you’d best work out that you wanted this badly enough to chance ripping the universe apart. From what you’ve told me, Rose would be more than a little put out if you turned coward at this point in the game.” She turned and entered the small shop she’d found.
The Doctor stood, sulking, on the street-she could see him through the window as she browsed casually through the magazines. She moved on to the drinks case, making a frown as though unable to find what she was looking for, and briefly chatted up the young man behind the counter before leaving empty-handed.
“You done sulking, then?”
“Time Lords don’t sulk.”
“What do you call what you’re doing then? I call it sulking. Get over it.”
The Doctor turned to her, his face stony. “I am not sulking,” he bit out, before pivoting on his heel to return to the TARDIS.
“Bollocks. See if I tell you when we are.” She followed him down the street, hurrying to keep up with his long strides.
They continued on to the park in silence, until finally Donna couldn’t take it any more.
“Alien boy!” She stopped and stood, arms crossed stubbornly.
The Doctor stopped; she saw him set his shoulders before turning to her. “What?”
“We’re in the right year.”
The Doctor paled before visibly relaxing.
“Can’t help you on Torchwood, though.”
He slowly smiled. “Oh, I can take care of that easily enough. You need anything from the TARDIS?”
“Don’t have any money, do I?”
“No Queen over here-your money wouldn’t be any good.” He grinned. “Don’t suppose you found out where we were?”
“How daft d’you think I am? Got used to asking for directions travelling with you, haven’t I? We’re about four blocks south of the River in Southwark.”
He reached down and took her hand. “You, Donna Noble, are brilliant. Up for a walk?”
“If it gets us to Rose? I’ll walk as far as you want. Just don’t think I’ll skip lunch.” He squeezed her hand, and set off to their right. She pulled him to a stop. “River’s that way.” She pointed in the opposite direction.
“I knew that. Just testing you.”
Donna rolled her eyes as they set off in the correct direction.
As they walked across the city, she noted that, barring the zeppelins, there wasn’t much difference between her London and Rose’s. The biggest differences she found were the lack of the Gherkin, and the fact that the Tower was an office and shopping complex. “President, remember?” the Doctor had said as she’d gawped. The day held fine, and it was almost two hours later that they arrived at their destination.
“Are you kidding me?” Donna sat heavily on a bench at a bus stop. The Doctor was staring up at a skyscraper, his hands in his pockets. “Isn’t this the same bloody building as you showed me back home?”
“Identical, in fact.”
“That’s got to be some kind of mulitversal joke.”
He looked back to her, his face serious. “It wasn’t very funny then.”
She sobered, and stood. “Nope, I imagine not. You just going to stare at it then? Or are we going to go in there and find your woman?”
The Doctor blushed. “She’s...I wouldn’t say...Rose isn’t...”
“She is, and you know it. Let’s go let her know we’re here.” Donna stepped forward, only to be jerked back by the Doctor.
“Bus,” he said simply. The red double-decker rumbled by, and they cautiously looked both ways before crossing the street.
The entrance to the skyscraper was average-looking: multiple sets of glass doors, their brass work gleaming, led into a stark granite lobby. A guard was seated behind the desk, and looked at them inquiringly. The Doctor froze.
Donna smiled, and walked up to the desk. “We’re looking for Rose Tyler.”
The guard did not smile back. “And who does she work for?”
“Torchwood,” Donna said confidently.
“Have you an appointment with Torchwood?”
“Ah, no. We’re old friends unexpectedly in town.”
The guard’s look became more severe. “Whom may I say is visiting?”
The Doctor shook himself from his stupor. “Tell her it’s the Doctor.”
“The Doctor?”
“That’s it. Just the Doctor.” The Doctor’s smile was tight around the edges, Donna noticed. She gave the guard her best don’t-mess-with-me look as he began to dial a number.
He whispered into the phone, and she noted a look of surprise cross his face before he rang off. He placed a book in front of them, and set a pen delicately in front of the Doctor. “If you could just sign in? Someone will be down shortly.” His tone of voice had even changed, and she had to fight down a satisfied snort.
The Doctor scrawled illegibly before stalking over to the seating area; she signed her name, giving the guard a brief insincere smile before moving to join the Doctor. He looked terrified, pacing back and forth in front of the chairs and sofa. Donna sat down with a sigh. “My feet are killing me. Think you can scare up some money so we could taxi back? Or at least use the bus?”
He ignored her and continued pacing, agitatedly. She sighed.
“You know that cute-and-charming act you do? It’s pretty decent. Now’d be the time to use it.”
He did not even glance in her direction.
“Wearing a hole in the floor’s not going to change things,” she snapped. “They’ll be down when they’re down. Until then, sit down already!”
He stopped, looked at her; seemed prepared to say something before changing his mind and sitting down next to her. “What if she doesn’t want to see me? What if--?”
“Shut it with the ‘what if’s’ already! You’re here. You’ll find out soon enough!”
The two of them lapsed into silence and continued to wait.