let me catch myself before i fall too far
so mo is house sitting for her sister and sunday night i spent sleept over with kate and mo's friend ben was over to play spades. watched sixteen candles for the first time because im 17 and i havent met my Jake Ryan yet. we woke up early because we had to get our asses in gear. we had plans to go to the morris arburitum with steph and brie. got up got ready (slowly) and left. the arbutitum was excellent. slightly hot but we played in the creek and all was well. came home and fell asleep FOREVER. woke up ate dinner at home (for a change) and went out with katie. we went to the mall (LOSERS) and got clothes at H&M. katie brought me a really cute vest halter. thanks girl! we hung out with christen, gavin, dan and jon for a little and then katie and i went to cedar grove park...i think ill be spending the better part of my summer there. then i came home. sat around online and began to think. lately ive been catching myself thiking to myself "hmm once i have my summer fling, things will be MUCH better." now god damn what AM I DOING IN MY HEAD!??? i have to stop that before i really convince myself thats its true. its scary that im even thinking it because i critisize girls who let their own happiness depend on a male. so here is my attempt to stop it. im going to try not to have a summer fling. not quite as hardcore as kate's "no boys clause" but a subtle adaptation. convince my mind the company of a boy will not make my state of mind or state of emotion any better or worse and the rest will fall into place.