This mind and heart thing
Seeing you again made me wish I could turn back time. Back to those days wherein you were mine and I was yours. I miss holding your hand. I miss having you hug me, touch me, love me. I miss a lot of things. A lot of you that I am afraid to let go of. I hold on to you even though I know letting go is the right and wise decision to make. It's funny how all we really had to ourselves was a month or so. And yet. I couldn't stay away. I couldn't keep myself.
We talked this over, you and I. We chose mind over heart. And so we let go. We both did. But why is it that I'm having a rather tough time while you, on the other hand, seem to be doing well? Now I'm starting to doubt. Was everything you said before all a ruse? You're so quiet that I can't tell. I can't decipher whether you're saying something because you mean it or simply because you think it's what I want to hear. I want to know what it is you really think. I want to know what you really feel. You make things seem so simple, when they aren't really...
Oh fuck it. All I know is, I was happy to see you. My heart wins this round.
And though the subject of this entry is different from before (yes, it's someone else now), these words still put forth whatever it is my heart wants to say. Familiar feelings, different receiver. Still, it's the same heart.
We talked this over, you and I. We chose mind over heart. And so we let go. We both did. But why is it that I'm having a rather tough time while you, on the other hand, seem to be doing well? Now I'm starting to doubt. Was everything you said before all a ruse? You're so quiet that I can't tell. I can't decipher whether you're saying something because you mean it or simply because you think it's what I want to hear. I want to know what it is you really think. I want to know what you really feel. You make things seem so simple, when they aren't really...
Oh fuck it. All I know is, I was happy to see you. My heart wins this round.
And though the subject of this entry is different from before (yes, it's someone else now), these words still put forth whatever it is my heart wants to say. Familiar feelings, different receiver. Still, it's the same heart.