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laurelnola March 21 2009, 18:09:36 UTC
WOO-HOO! It's done! Alright, I need to stop jumping and glue my butt to the seat so I can read....

"Once, a long time ago, Kal-El had meant more to him than world conquest, and what was left of him still remembered that. Buried underneath that overbearing Kryptonian attitude, the memory still lived. And all it had taken to bring it back was the sight of one devoted father."

Love this! First, I just love how protective Gabe is of his baby, but also, it's easy to forget that before SV came along, Jor-El wasn't a douchebag, but a devoted, protective father who gave his own life for his son's. I love that you reminded us of the true Jor-El here.

"As she watched, the colors began to shift and swirl around them in a rhythm that looked, strangely, like the fluttering of delicate wings. For the space of an awestruck breath, she was caught, motionless, in a whirlwind of magical butterflies."

What an awesome image! Pure fairy-tale goodness!

"At a lazy gesture from the prince, three armed sentries appeared from the other room. “Although when it comes to this particular lovely lady, I’ve learned that it’s best to be cautious."

Heh. You can't say Alexander lacks brains. ;-) Love the shout-out to the Chlex dynamic, which has always been one of my secret guilty pleasures.

"Leo flashed him a grin that would have looked at home on a shark-“as well as your new position as royal food taster.”
Chloe hid a smile as Alexander bowed again, much more stiffly than before, and stalked out of the room with her and her escort trailing behind."

Whee! I SO miss Lionel and Lex. They had such a Greek tragedy relationship that no one else can really duplicate. I can't give AlMiles credit for much, but casting JG and MR in those roles would have to be high on the list of stuff they got right. And you captured them perfectly, Deb!

... on to the conclusion! *bounces again*

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carcassi March 21 2009, 18:46:03 UTC
Whee, Dawn, the best part of finishing this fic is getting to read your comments! What I said to Dee, above, applies to you too--You NEVER fail to pick out the passages I liked the most, and/or the plot points I think are the most important, or gave me the most trouble. It's like you have a literary sixth sense, no doubt b/c you're such a good writer yourself. :)

In this case, as usual, you quoted just about every one of the passages I worked on the hardest. I'm thrilled that you enjoyed them! Especially the one about Jor-El:

...it's easy to forget that before SV came along, Jor-El wasn't a douchebag, but a devoted, protective father who gave his own life for his son's. I love that you reminded us of the true Jor-El here.

The more deeply I got into writing this, the more I saw the parallels between the "real" Jor-El and Gabriel, and I'm glad you thought it came out here. :)

And as for Chlex....I hope you're reading the conclusion right now, b/c I think you might like what you see..... ;)

Thank you, as always, for the lovely feedback, Dawn! *Hugs*

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