Initial reaction 13.22: "Exodus"
THEN: Eh. Basically, the last episode, and all the mytharc for this season. If we die, we'll do that together too. (OH NO SAM THAT WAS A LIE BECAUSE YOU'RE DEAD YOU'RE DEAD AND DEAN IS ALONE.)
NOW: We start right where we left off, with Sam arriving at the camp, Lucifer trailing behind. Sam starts walking and I think we're going to get the brohug, but he goes straight to Mary. Okay, that was the point of this trip, so, okay. Get the Mary hug over with. Dean seems dazed, and asks what happened, and Sam has to admit Lucifer brought him back. Lucifer is doing his "ain't I a sweetie" bit, which doesn't fool anybody (spoiler alert: until it does).
(Also, I watched Shaun of the Dead immediately after this episode last night, so I'm dealing with some serious SotD/SPN crossover thoughts. I apologize in advance.)
Sam stays by Mary as Lucifer announces he wants to join the team, and as much as I want the brohug, it actually makes sense that he's reluctant to open himself up to his brother right now, considering who he brought with him. He's still full of fear and shame and I want to hug him and make him some tea.
You've got red on you.
Lucifer approaches Jack, and Dean is having none of it. He marches over and demands that Lucifer not talk, and Jack not listen. Cas agrees, and Jack doesn't seem too thrilled with his father, but he's also not thrilled when Dean instructs Gabriel to kill him. Gabe doesn't (and we don't really know why? he's not powerful enough, but as Dean points out, he has the blade) and there is yelling and Jack gets upset and disappears. Which he does when he gets upset.
Title card!
(Hmmm. I really hoped we'd get the brohug before the title card.)
Gabriel goes off to look for Jack, Lucifer acts like a victim, and Cas gets the magic handcuffs out of Dean's backpack. Oh, is that why they didn't use them on Lucifer back in the bunker? In the dungeon, which is the appropriate place for the all-powerful supernatural being you're trying to keep captive? Good choice, guys. Cas says that if Lucifer really is a team player, he won't mind wearing the cuffs. "You're not at full power; these should hold you."
Sam says "No, wait, he is at full power, he told me so, and that's how he was able to resurrect me." Ha ha no he doesn't, because that would be the smart and logical thing to say right now, and guess who wrote this episode. (Hint: they are neither smart nor logical.) What Sam actually does is ask Lucifer if the rift is closed, because apparently he and Lucifer didn't talk on the way here.
(Sidebar: There are so many good codas to 13.21, and I feel like I should rec every single one I read, but right now, I'm going to suggest The Long Walk and The Richest Wood, both of which cover the walk from the mine to Dayton and will fuck you right up.)
Lucifer says no, he "left Rowena some grace," as if he did that intentionally, and he estimates the rift will be open for another 31 hours. Okay, that's... oddly specific. Very, very oddly specific. But Dean takes it as gospel (heh heh) and notes the time on his watch. (And yes, I mistakenly thought the rift closed when Lucifer went through it. I don't know why y'all listen to a damn thing I say here.)
Cut to Rowena, completely with bagpipe(ish) music, studying the Black Grimoire and watching the grace in the spell bowl flicker ominously.
Back in AU Land, we see Sam, still beautifully bloody though he has wiped his face off a bit, setting a timer on his phone. So apparently he believes Lucifer too. (Sidebar: You know how sometimes when his hair flips up in the back, it looks like Mary Tyler Moore? And other times it's just a little rough and curly and magnificent? This is one of the good times.) He turns to see Dean approaching, and the first thing he does is apologize for being killed by vampires and resurrected by Lucifer, because he's Sam Winchester.
Hey. Listen, I'm sorry about all this.
Are you good?
I'm alive, yeah.
Well then, you got nothing to apologize for. {hugs Sam} Thought I lost you, man.
And we finally get the hug. There are a lot of good things about this hug. Sam's face, for one. He's nervous and tentative and Jared just does such an outstanding job showing Sam's anxiety about their reunion. And the way he closes his eyes. It just cracks my black little heart into pieces. And Dean's face, and the way his voice gets a little rough when he says "thought I lost you," the chin tuck right at the end, and the way he does that thing where he changes his expression and looks away right after he lets go, so Sam can't see how emotional he really was during that hug; I always love the way he does that.
Hello, pickle!
But on the other hand, I feel like we got ripped off. This was a very nice hug, but it wasn't a you were DEAD, Sam hug. I wanted that immediate, desperately clutching, All Hell Breaks Loose Pt 2 kind of hug. This was more like a I know you're worried about whatever it is we're worried about this season, but it's gonna be okay kind of hug.
(Sidebar: What I really want is a forehead touch. I want Sam to show up in camp and Dean to stomp over and hug him, and then Sam apologizes and Dean does the forehead touch - he'd have to put his hand on the back of Sam's neck and pull his head down a bit - and says "you got nothing to apologize for.")
Is this too much to ask?
Also, I hate the thought that Sam actually wandered off to a cabin alone before Dean approached him. Why did you let that happen, Dean? Why weren't you as happy about Sam as you were angry about Lucifer? That's the kind of emotional response I wanted. (I know, I know, we're lucky we got anything at all.)
(Sidebar: if you are also distraught at Sam wandering the camp alone, without anyone taking care of him, might I suggest Hot Tea and Comfort, which is billed as "comfort without plot" but if you think that means treacly angst-free fluff you are very, very wrong.)
The conversation continues:
What are we going to do about Lucifer?
I'll handle him. I will, Dean, let me handle him.
Okay.
And there are marvelous things here, too. Particularly Sam's determined little I'll handle him face, and Dean's quiet acceptance. Sam reminds me so much of the end of s5 here, with that I let him out, I'll put him back attitude. Even though he's not responsible for any of this. {Side-eyes Cas angrily}
SO much pretty.
We see Jack, wherever he disappeared to, remembering scenes I don't think we ever saw from his mother's video. She says she won't blame him if he wants to look for his father someday (without adding "but please be careful because he is literally the Devil") and stresses that he is who he chooses to be, not who anyone else tells him to be. Convenient memory there. I hope it doesn't come back to bite anybody in the ass. He also remembers accidentally hurting/killing people, and Sam being awesome and telling him he's good.
Back at the camp, Mary is loading her gun. Lucifer walks by, under Cas's guard, and says "Hey, Mama. Miss me?" Mary punches him in the face, which is something we all needed to see, and it's a nice callback to what she said at the end of s12. Sam and Dean show up and tell her they need to find Jack and then get back home. (Sam has cleaned up and changed into a grey sweatshirt and camo jacket. He looks damn good. Dean looks good too. Jensen actually looks so good in this entire episode, with his dark jacket and longer hair, that I have to rewatch several scenes so I can concentrate on one brother and then the other. It's a good problem to have.)
Mary tells the boys she's not going back, because she respects these people and their cause and can't just abandon them. They are dumbstruck, and she says "Sam, Dean, I know what you went through to come find me." Dean says "No, you don't know what we went through. Sam died. Sam died to come find you, and I had to live through that."
No, unfortunately, Dean doesn't actually say that. But his face says it for him.
She says she has to stay because these people need her, and Dean says no, we need you. (Which, you kinda don't, Dean. You want her; you don't really need her.) He angrily tells her that they've been through a lot of shit but they've never walked away, even when they should have, because not every fight can be won. (Does Sam look a little guilty? Thinking "I tried to walk away a couple of times?" Maybe.) So, um, what are you saying here, Dean? That she shouldn't walk away from your fight? Because your speech could also be interpreted as you never walk away, and neither should she, and that's why she needs to stay here and fight. (Thanks, Buckleming!)
He's shocked when Sam won't argue with Mary. "Mom doesn't want to leave these people. So let's take them with us." He suggests they take everyone back through the rift, to keep them safe, and figure out a way to take out Michael. Then they can come back and save their world. Smart!Sam for the win. Dean has apparently counted on bringing nine people back (Dean, Sam, Cas, Jack, Mary, Gabriel, Ketch, Charlie, Lucifer?), and asks how many more there would be, and Mary says 25. And for some reason, 25 people is a huge deal. Maybe they're thinking about the number of bedrooms available in the bunker.
Elsewhere, Cas and Lucifer are chatting when Jack reappears. He tells Lucifer to call him Jack, not "son," and tells Cas he's not going to talk to him. He's going to listen. Well, okay then. That can only end well. But he does end up talking, because Lucifer asks if he has any questions, and Jack asks "why does everyone hate you?"
Good question! Lucifer whines that he gets blamed for anything bad that happens. He does cop to leading a few souls astray, but it's because "humans are so messed up, they're so willing to be led." Except not Jack's mom, because she was awesome, and he lost his virginity to her, which makes me ask again, what was happening in that hotel room with Vincifer and all the lingerie strewn about? Just pillow fights and braiding each others' hair? Okay then. Anyway. Humans aren't perfect, and also, how can Lucifer be blamed for bad things that happened while he was locked in a cage?
Cas says "Oh, speaking of that cage. Did you know he was trapped in there with Sam - yes, Sam, who you adore - for eons? And he tortured him so badly that when Sam got out, he was insane? And that Sam was with him in that cage because he thought it was the only way to lock Lucifer safely away, because the other option was participating in a showdown in which Dean would have been forced to serve as Michael's vessel and kill him?"
Actually, no, Cas doesn't say any of that. Because that would be the smart and logical thing to say, and remember who wrote this one. What he does say is that Lucifer is oversimplifying things. Yes, Cas. Lucifer's particular brand of evil is very complex. Hard to really describe. Difficult to come up with concrete examples, particularly of bad things he might have done to people Jack knows and loves.
{sigh} Carrying on. Lucifer tells Jack his father locked him in the cage, with no warning or chance to make amends, simply because he wasn't gung-ho about those nasty little humans. (Sidebar: Remember Samifer explaining to Dean why he'd been cast out of Heaven? And how convincing that was? How you almost felt sorry for him, even though it was clearly a load of narcissistic garbage? Those were the days.) All Lucifer wants is a chance to improve, and doesn't anyone want that? Oooh, it's a good thing Jack was just remembering how he accidentally hurt and killed people, so he can sympathize!
Cas goes off and tells the Winchesters what's happening, while Lucifer shares his family history with Jack. TFW shows up and Dean again angrily says no talking and no listening, but Jack wants to hear about his family and learn about his powers. Cas says they are his family, and Sam tells him he doesn't know who Lucifer really is. "And I never will, unless I talk to him," says Jack. It's really too bad that Sam (and I guess everybody else, but to me this is a Sam Thing) has been so reluctant to let Jack know what a literal monster his father is.
Next we see the whole gang on their way to the other camp. Lucifer is still telling his self-serving life story to Jack, but Mary assures Dean that Jack will not go darkside. For his part, Jack is excited that they can kill Michael now that Lucifer is here, and he's distressed when Sam tells him that's not their plan right now. Cas shows up from the opposite direction, apparently having gone looking for Gabriel, who had scouted ahead. We then see Gabriel running up to the group and announcing there are angels, which he doesn't have to do, because the angels are inches behind him. The angels gear up to kill the group, and the group raises their weapons, and then the angels are suddenly vaporized. By Lucifer. We see the cuffs melting off Lucifer's wrists. "I knew they wouldn't hold me in this world," he says. "Long story short, I didn't want your impotence to get awkward, so I just went along." So, wait. Magic/protection works differently in this world? Even though we've seen their angelic warding works against Cas? M'kay.
The gang arrives at the other camp, which is located at Singer Auto Salvage, although it's not in Sioux Falls. AU Bobby is pleased to see the boys, and I'm pleased to see him. He tells them Ketch and Charlie are gone on a mission to thwart some kind of angelic kill squad, and as the guys drink something that's either very bad coffee or very strong Irish coffee, he says their idea to take the crew back to their world is "the dumbest freakin' idea in a landfill of dumb ideas."
Meanwhile, Lucifer tells Jack about his uncles. Jack's not a big fan of Michael, since he was tortured by him, and wow, wouldn't it be interesting if Jack knew Lucifer had tortured Sam. I wonder if that would have any impact. I wonder if we'll ever know. Instead, Lucifer says Michael tortured him too, so they can bond over that. They wander over to talk to Gabriel, who starts to mention what Lucifer did to him, but Lucifer interrupts him. And instead of saying "no, I don't actually recall a happy ending, I recall that you murdered me because I stood up for mankind," Gabriel just snarks a bit, tells Lucifer he wasn't the victim he thinks he was, and walks away.
Sidetrip. Ketch and Charlie encounter the angelic kill squad, but it turns out they've been set up.
Singer Auto Salvage Camp. Sam and Dean are explaining their plan to a few skeptical rebels. I don't know what their problem is. Take car. Go to Mum's. Kill Phil - "Sorry." - grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over. Sounds like a solid plan to me.
How's that for a slice of fried gold?
The crew seems more interested once Sam discusses all the resources they have in the bunker, and they say they'll talk to their people and take a vote. After they leave, Bobby tells the Winchesters that Charlie and Ketch were ambushed. I wonder how that information got to him? We see a little bit of Ketch being tortured as Charlie watches, and he tells them the location of the rebel base is near Boardwalk and Park Place. Is Monopoly a thing in the UK? Or is this a bit of Ketch's secret non-British past?
But not to worry, the angel has sent for "an expert in these matters." I wonder why they can't just pry the information out of Ketch's head like Cas did to Donatello. These guys really need a Cas of their own. OH MY GOD YOU GUYS THE EXPERT IS CAS. WHAT A SHOCKER. (Did that sound enthusiastic? Was it believable? I'm going for enthusiastic here.)
Back at Singer Auto Salvage Camp, the brothers interrogate the guy who told Charlie and Ketch about the kill squad while Cas creeps up behind him. He denies it was a setup, so Dean gives the signal and Cas gets the glowy blue eyes and puts his hands on the guy's head and I thought he was going to yank the knowledge out, but apparently not, because Dean asks "you want to try that again?" So I guess they were just, um, torturing him for answers. That's awkward.
But hot.
Somewhere outside the camp, Lucifer and Gabriel are on watch duty. Lucifer is whining about not being with Jack, and Gabriel tells him Jack's not like him, because of "his mother's bloodline, the Winchester's influence." He's sure Jack will see Lucifer's true nature, that his jealousy of humans is like a cancer.
Return to AU Cas. Looks like someone told Misha they loved him playing not-Cas when he was in the Empty, because he's really gone for it this time. Oddly enough, even though AU Michael doesn't look like our Michael and AU Zachariah doesn't look like our Zachariah (what a pity), AU Castiel looks exactly like our Castiel, except he has a weird Hitler hairdo and a German accent. So, how is it that AU Charlie led a life so much like our Charlie that she even ended up with the same fake name, and AU Bobby is so much like our Bobby that he has a Singer Auto Salvage, and yet AU Jimmy Novak is so different from our Jimmy Novak that he's German? He assures Charlie that ve haf vays of making you talk, and he puts his hands on her head, oooh, just like Cas! I'm not sure if it's causing fear or pain, but either way, she screams, and then the lights go out. Because angelic work simply requires incandescent light, AU Cas stops his thing, and the other angels go out to investigate, where they're knocked about by Jack.
Mary, Sam, and Dean run in, and engage in physical battle with the angels, including actual fists, because the angels have... lost the ability to smite them by touch or even just by snapping their fingers. I guess incandescent light really is that important. Seriously, if angels are this easy to kill in hand-to-hand combat, I don't know why the resistance is losing so badly. They must really suck. AU Cas tries to escape in a truck, because angels can't fly in this world either. I mean, they could earlier, when we saw them zap away with AU Charlie on the bridge, but that was in broad daylight. And it's dark now. Angelic powers, man. So fragile in the face of darkness. Charlie and Ketch are rescued, and Sam pulls Charlie into a hug, then suddenly remembers she's not his Charlie and backs away, apologizing.
"No, that's cool, and also, I'm suddenly a lot straighter than I was five minutes ago."
Ketch makes a joke about Dean finally being the one to rescue him. AU Cas is stopped by our Cas, and says "Don't think that you are better than me." Oh, but I am, says Cas, because I have this awesome fluffy hair and no stupid evil henchman accent. And he kills him.
They make it back to the camp, where Bobby tells them everyone voted to go back with him. Dean and Sam are still weirdly freaked out about getting 25 people back to the rift. Then Dean notices a bus. Next thing we know, he's working with someone to fix it. Dean makes an adjustment to the engine and motions for someone inside - obviously Sam, right? - to start it. Oh, no, it's not Sam, it's fucking Lucifer. Why is Dean working with Lucifer? Why does he trust him? Why would he pick the single least trustworthy life form in that camp to work on the bus with him? But they get it going and Lucifer gives him a finger gun, and Dean gives Lucifer a thumbs-up, and any good will I had built up from that nice little hug is draining quickly, guys.
Gabriel is surprised that Dean's letting Lucifer drive, but Dean says this way they know what he's doing. Yes, you'll know exactly what he's doing as he drives off in the wrong direction, or plunges the bus over a cliff. Seriously, what the fuck?
Sam shows up to announce they have an hour and 57 minutes left, which of course assumes that (1) when Lucifer said "31 hours, give or take," he meant exactly 31 hours and (b) he was correct in that estimation, and (3) Sam set his timer exactly when Lucifer said that. But let's go with it, okay? Sam loads people onto the bus, and is surprised to see Jack heading off in the opposite direction. When Sam asks him where he's going, Jack says wants to kill Michael before he leaves. Lucifer pops in and convinces him that he's putting everyone in danger by not sticking with the group, and Sam looks a little anxious but mostly annoyed that Lucifer is doing the "good dad" thing.
Jack, I don't know how you can resist that grey sweatshirt and the gently windblown hair. I really don't.
But it works. "My father makes a valid point," Jack says.
Oh, shit.
Ha ha this is not good at all. But at least Jack rides in the Jeep, with Sam, Dean, and Gabriel, while the bus follows with Lucifer driving and Mary and Bobby hanging out the open doors.
Winchesters in an open Jeep is something I didn't know I needed, but it turns out I needed it a lot.
They make it to the rift without incident, although it's starting to close. Sam does the shouty voice and tells everyone to hurry, and then we see Rowena straining to fire it up again, and it gets stronger. Ketch is the first one through, and he and Rowena give each other a cute "hm" of mutual recognition, and I'm glad the writers remembered these two have history. Then Jack comes through. Lucifer wants to follow, but Sam pushes him back, saying they need him and Gabriel on this side in case something happens. "Wasn't that the whole point of you being on the team?" (Ha ha ha no of course it wasn't; bless you Sam you magnificent bastard.)
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Anagram of meat is team... I don't know what he's talking about.
One by one the rebels go through the rift, and there are only a few left when we see the glow of an approaching angel attack in the sky. Some of the rebels are killed, probably because Lucifer parked the bus so far from the rift, and Michael appears.
At this point, the only survivors who haven't gone through the rift are Sam, Dean, Gabriel, and Lucifer. They all make a run for it so they can go through the rift and slam it shut. Ha ha ha ha no, of course they don't, because that would be the smart and logical thing to do. Instead, they stand there staring as Lucifer approaches Michael, and they watch the fight that Lucifer ends up losing.
Gabriel tells the brothers to go through the rift while he buys them some time. "All I did on earth was run. I'm not running any more." The Winchesters creep closer to the rift but still don't go through it, so they get to watch Michael kill Gabriel. Presumably for reals this time.
Sam tells Dean to go, and Dean actually does go through the rift without either pushing Sam ahead of him or dragging him with him, which surprises me. Then Sam turns, with a very determined look, and as Lucifer tries to make his way through the rift, Sam pushes him away. "How did you think this was gonna end?" he asks. OH HOLY MOTHER OF GOD IS SAM FINALLY GETTING HIS REVENGE? SOMEONE HOLD ME. Sam shoves Lucifer to the ground and disappears through the rift. It closes just in time, leaving Lucifer and Michael on the other side. Boom. Sam said he'd handle Lucifer and he fucking handled him. Bless you, my son.
Bunker! Everyone's happily drinking beer and whiskey. Sam's drinking whiskey with Rowena in that goddamn grey sweatshirt that I love so much. (Seriously, what is it about that shirt?) He says they owe her one, and she says "and don't think I won't collect." And it's too bad Summergen is for gen fics, because my entire list of requests would be Rowena collects.
You know you want it too.
Oh, and Jack is sitting sad and alone, clutching a beer even though he's only eight months old. Someone's going to go talk to him, aren't they? Soon? Please? I guess not. Dean tells Cas about Gabe's sacrifice and Sam's handling of Lucifer, and then Bobby makes a speech, warning everyone not get soft, because they're going to figure out how to take out Michael and then they're all going back. As he mentions their brothers and sisters who will never be forgotten, we get a look at Jack, not forgetting his father. Bobby welcomes Sam and Dean to the family, which as we know don't end in blood.
As Bertrand Russell once said, "The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation." I think we can all appreciate the relevance of that now.
Was that on a beer mat?
Yeah, it was Guinness Extra Cold.
Everyone looks happy except for Jack, who is very conspicuously still sad and still alone. Why isn't someone with him? Why are these two men who supposedly love him like a son, and this one man who grudgingly appreciates him, and this woman who's been fighting with him for months, why are they all ignoring him?
Anyway. Back in AU Land, we see Gabriel on the ground, complete with charcoal wings and empty staring eyes. He's toast. Michael and Lucifer are chatting in a very congenial way, considering. Lucifer says he knows how to open the rift.
And then I get my son. And you get -
Everything else. Are we agreed?
And Lucifer looks away, troubled.
Oh, for FUCK'S SAKE. Are they really doing this? Are they going for the redemption arc? Is Lucifer going to feel guilty about damning the world just to get his hands on his son? I will not stand for this. Which means, I'll watch it, and I'll complain mightily about it.
All righty then. Like the last episode, this one had highs and lows. The highs weren't as high. The lows were lower, and more stupid. I really, really hate that they've gone the soap opera route, where awful things happen just because people won't fucking talk. All Jack needed to hear was A SINGLE SENTENCE about specific, concrete things Lucifer has done, instead of all the generic, meta-level crap they dished out in this episode. I can handwave a lot of nonsense about variances in angelic powers. I can put up with a weak post-resurrection reunion. But Dean not sitting down and saying "Look, Jack, you need to know what your father did to Sam" is inexcusable.
I'll be on the road next week and I won't be able to review the episode until everyone has already watched and digested it, and moved on. I'll most likely recap it anyway, just because I use my recaps when I want to remember something later. And also for consistency, since I've got a little OCD thing going on.
So. Until next time, always remember, dogs can look up. (Once again, I apologize if you haven't seen Shaun of the Dead.)
I may end up completely spoiled before I see the finale, but just in case, please don't put spoilers in the comments, thanks!