2 June, 1712
My dear Commodore.
As it might have been drawn to your lugubrious attention
back on the docks the other night, I managed to finagle that which we already spoke about managing. This would seem to be the second time within a week, wouldn't it, that you have determined to clap me in irons and missed the mark, as they say, eh? If you plan on
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Captain Sparrow.
I must first express my shock at your literacy. Clearly I underestimated you on that count. However- that is beside the point.
Much as it grieves me to waste paper and ink upon your sorry person, it seems that I have no other option. I'm afraid I haven't the slightest idea what you're referencing in the way of management. You shall have to enlighten me.
I shall warn you, however, that it is not I who shall have to become used to failure. And a reminder might serve that it is best, when on a moving ship, not attempt to write in the presence of open liquids. The last sentence of your message was entirely spoilt by what I'm sure is rum; of course, you probably know that.
~Commodore J. Norrington
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My dear Commodore,
See? Not that hard is it to remember the placement of Captain before me name, despite however much it might pain those to remember it. I can never understand that. Man's got to have a proper title, eh? Why it seems that civiliaty gets ignored is beyond the likes of me. That's neither here nor there though I'd wager.
The ink and paper I'm sure are sorry along with you. Might feel better all if they had a dash of rum in them. Makes the ink stick better what with all this propensity to wetness about us. But I think we've covered your violent absolution to drink and such sorts of that nature, however seductive it may be.
Though by the way of failure, are we tompare the spilling of a bit of drink, as precious as rum is to be sure, to the incapability of a good man trying to catch a good man? I do appreciate that, Commodore. Your capability when it comes to head starts will never go forgotten.
Incapabily yours,
Capt. J.S.
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Sparrow.
You have eminently failed to answer my question.
And I should like to point out that I have no manner of 'violent absolution' to drink, especially as that is a horrifically wrong usage of the word 'absolution.' I believe the term which your addled head wanted to come up with was 'aversion.' No, I see nothing amiss with a drink now and again, and as a sailor, I certainly know the benefits of a cup of grog on a cold night. However, the intoxicated captaining of a vessel is something else entirely.
My thanks for acknowledging my status as a good man. That shall go down in the record books, I think.
~Commodore J. Norrington
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You missed the Captain. Captain Sparrow if you please.
That could be your problem, mate. Spend all that time vigilantly through vocabularlry and the like instead of tracking down scallywags and brigands. Not that I know as I've never been one for that which you are currently in the midst of attempting to actively somehow foreseeingly do. Not to say I don't think I could stomach the mind what it is to be understanding that either.
What question was that? You're not making much sense, mate.
Capt. J.S.
P.S. Are you not a good man then mate? Other inclinations that bring about the urge to give ones like meself a day to themselves?
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