Waxing lyrical
Was talking to my daughter on the phone about what she's been doing in Edinburgh the past couple of days, the answer to which is loads and she's having lots of fun. But she kept mentioning a purple cow -
You know mum, the purple cow? You must've seen it?
Er, no. I thought she must've been spiking her porridge with bootleg blueberry vodka. Shows what I know, i.e. nothing, because it turns out that it's a famous Fringe festival venue, and all the stars go there including Ruby Wax.
Ruby's written reports are like her speech, non-stop motor-mouthing, but bless her how she always mentions Alan Rickman, such as here http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/lifestyle/esmagazine/article-23979478-diary-ruby-wax.do and again here http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/comedy/features/my-edinburgh-ruby-wax-comedian-2342594.html
I love that her kids are so used to Teh Man that they are totally unintimidated and probably unimpressed by his presence. Oh that I could be so cool. Or had even known about a Fringe venue called Underbelly!
This year's Fringe festival top ten jokes...
1) Nick Helm: "I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves."
2) Tim Vine: "Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels."
3) Hannibal Buress: "People say 'I'm taking it one day at a time'. You know what? So is everybody. That's how time works."
4) Tim Key: "Drive-Thru McDonalds was more expensive than I thought... once you've hired the car..."
5) Matt Kirshen: "I was playing chess with my friend and he said, 'Let's make this interesting'. So we stopped playing chess."
6) Sarah Millican: "My mother told me, you don't have to put anything in your mouth you don't want to. Then she made me eat broccoli, which felt like double standards."
7) Alan Sharp: "I was in a band which we called The Prevention, because we hoped people would say we were better than The Cure."
8) Mark Watson: "Someone asked me recently - what would I rather give up, food or sex. Neither! I'm not falling for that one again, wife."
9) Andrew Lawrence: "I admire these phone hackers. I think they have a lot of patience. I can't even be bothered to check my OWN voicemails."
10) DeAnne Smith: "My friend died doing what he loved ... Heroin."
P.S. The cyclist and its custodian made it safely back to Edinburgh early evening, courtesy of ScotRail. They'll all be home here tomorrow...
You know mum, the purple cow? You must've seen it?
Er, no. I thought she must've been spiking her porridge with bootleg blueberry vodka. Shows what I know, i.e. nothing, because it turns out that it's a famous Fringe festival venue, and all the stars go there including Ruby Wax.
Ruby's written reports are like her speech, non-stop motor-mouthing, but bless her how she always mentions Alan Rickman, such as here http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/lifestyle/esmagazine/article-23979478-diary-ruby-wax.do and again here http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/comedy/features/my-edinburgh-ruby-wax-comedian-2342594.html
I love that her kids are so used to Teh Man that they are totally unintimidated and probably unimpressed by his presence. Oh that I could be so cool. Or had even known about a Fringe venue called Underbelly!
This year's Fringe festival top ten jokes...
1) Nick Helm: "I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves."
2) Tim Vine: "Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels."
3) Hannibal Buress: "People say 'I'm taking it one day at a time'. You know what? So is everybody. That's how time works."
4) Tim Key: "Drive-Thru McDonalds was more expensive than I thought... once you've hired the car..."
5) Matt Kirshen: "I was playing chess with my friend and he said, 'Let's make this interesting'. So we stopped playing chess."
6) Sarah Millican: "My mother told me, you don't have to put anything in your mouth you don't want to. Then she made me eat broccoli, which felt like double standards."
7) Alan Sharp: "I was in a band which we called The Prevention, because we hoped people would say we were better than The Cure."
8) Mark Watson: "Someone asked me recently - what would I rather give up, food or sex. Neither! I'm not falling for that one again, wife."
9) Andrew Lawrence: "I admire these phone hackers. I think they have a lot of patience. I can't even be bothered to check my OWN voicemails."
10) DeAnne Smith: "My friend died doing what he loved ... Heroin."
P.S. The cyclist and its custodian made it safely back to Edinburgh early evening, courtesy of ScotRail. They'll all be home here tomorrow...