If you had just one shot...
I'm fairly certain that a number of things are crashing down around me. This would be a concern could I be on some form of routine right now, but everything seems to exist in static. I don't like this and I don't think it works well for me. However I can't shake the feeling that I'm letting people down every day. I just can't be everywhere at the same time. I can't raise my money for Guatemala, I can't spend enough time with the people I care about and I certainly don't see my family enough for living in their house.
I came to class 45 minutes late. I was up all night checking on Dan, because I was his DD for the night, and Devin and Corey got him completely shitfaced. I felt terrible for him and I'm really glad I was there to keep an eye on him. I wasn't overly worried though. I let him sleep in the bathroom of the suite for a while because I knew he would be ok. I'm getting better at this. I can't begin to say how happy I am about that.
But I'm still struggling and I feel like I"m running out of energy. I need all of these things going on in my life to end. When summer comes I need to NOT have projects, to not have obligations because right now I don't have time to breathe and doing one thing inevitably means having a bad time because I'm not doing something else with someone else. It leaves me unsatisfied more and more and it seems that my mind won't let anything slide without going a little crazy.
Part of me just wants to be away from this goddam town. I don't want to worry about any of it anymore, but I don't think it's in the cards. Too much of me wants to be here.
I don't fucking understand any of what this guy is talking about. Fuck it all, I'm so done with this.
I came to class 45 minutes late. I was up all night checking on Dan, because I was his DD for the night, and Devin and Corey got him completely shitfaced. I felt terrible for him and I'm really glad I was there to keep an eye on him. I wasn't overly worried though. I let him sleep in the bathroom of the suite for a while because I knew he would be ok. I'm getting better at this. I can't begin to say how happy I am about that.
But I'm still struggling and I feel like I"m running out of energy. I need all of these things going on in my life to end. When summer comes I need to NOT have projects, to not have obligations because right now I don't have time to breathe and doing one thing inevitably means having a bad time because I'm not doing something else with someone else. It leaves me unsatisfied more and more and it seems that my mind won't let anything slide without going a little crazy.
Part of me just wants to be away from this goddam town. I don't want to worry about any of it anymore, but I don't think it's in the cards. Too much of me wants to be here.
I don't fucking understand any of what this guy is talking about. Fuck it all, I'm so done with this.