30.
Character: Captain Jack Harkness.
Series: Doctor Who / Torchwood.
Age: Old. Looks ~40.
Job: Non-Human Resources Management.
Canon: Over the last thirty-odd years, Doctor Who has enraptured viewers with a variety of strange alien species throughout space and time. Jack Harkness's claim to fame is to have flirted with all of them. Originally a companion to the Ninth Doctor, deus ex machina has left Jack a "fixed point in space and time" - meaning he never stays dead. Jack spent a hundred or so years working for the alien-hunting organization of Great Britain: Torchwood- he outlived enough people they eventually gave him the Cardiff branch to play with. Jack recruited a variety of mentally unstable humans, and Torchwood Three spends most of its time analysing, shooting and seducing aliens and each other. Occasionally, they save the world.
Originally from the 51st Century, where sexuality is fluid and technology is advanced, Jack enjoys playing the exotic enigma and knowing things he shouldn't. On the surface, he is loud, flamboyant and flirtatious, always with a terrible pun or dirty joke to hand. Underneath, hundreds of years wear hard; Jack has been a soldier too many times and lost too many people. He's a strong leader who knows how to make hard decisions and kick serious ass, and he's perfectly happy to die for the cause; mostly because afterwards he'll get back up and keep on fighting. Jack enjoys projecting his issues, standing dramatically on top of very tall buildings, naked hide-and-go-seek, and exposition.
Sample Post:
I know what you're thinking. Guy like me: great body, high quality dentistry, killer fashion sense, you're wondering what I'm doing working in some kind of summer camp. Now I've been in a lot of positions before - and believe me, I mean a lot of positions, this one time I got stuck upside-down with my eyebrow tickling my thigh and if it hadn't been for the jar of motor oil in the boot who knows what could have happened! But I digress.
I'm here investigating claims of paranormal activity in your Camp. Ma'am, are you aware that many of your campers have been undergoing unusual physical changes? No, I'm not talking about puberty; I'm talking about the prevalence of deformed facial expressions and, quote unquote, chibification. Have you ever seen a guy with a mouth like a three turned sideways? Pray you never do. Not to mention the fact that I've only been here a day and I've got samples of half a dozen diseases found nowhere else on Earth, though I did encounter a more prolonged form of the gender reversal virus way out in Diomedes Nine a long time ago. Spent most of the day locked in my room... you ever considered marketing it?
Then there's the humanitarian aspect. One camper informed me you have them all stuck playing an eternal game that it's impossible to win. Another introduced me to some of the local flora and fauna - well, Marcy kinda introduced herself. About five times. Hell of a tentacle monster, that one! The report also mentions some campers have been manifesting sudden rains of rosepetals, pink clouds, and occasionally: sparkles. I'm afraid unless I see documentation of the involvement of Stephanie Meyers, I'm gonna have to declare this entire summer camp in breach of Directive 32, and a Weeaboo Singularity.
But hey, don't look upset! Nothing more tragic than a sad expression on a beautiful woman. See, a few months ago I received a letter inviting me to join your highly specialized team. Don't think I've ever been offered a job with such unique opportunities in Employee Relations. At the time... well, I was a little busy. Now? I'm willing to accept your offer, since it'll give me a chance to keep an ongoing watch on this place. Though uh, we may have to renegotiate some of the fine print. Resource Management I can handle, but I'm not so sure about this secondary position. It says, "Camp Target Practice"...?
IN with 98.2%
(re-apped with 4668 comments on 11.07.09.)
Series: Doctor Who / Torchwood.
Age: Old. Looks ~40.
Job: Non-Human Resources Management.
Canon: Over the last thirty-odd years, Doctor Who has enraptured viewers with a variety of strange alien species throughout space and time. Jack Harkness's claim to fame is to have flirted with all of them. Originally a companion to the Ninth Doctor, deus ex machina has left Jack a "fixed point in space and time" - meaning he never stays dead. Jack spent a hundred or so years working for the alien-hunting organization of Great Britain: Torchwood- he outlived enough people they eventually gave him the Cardiff branch to play with. Jack recruited a variety of mentally unstable humans, and Torchwood Three spends most of its time analysing, shooting and seducing aliens and each other. Occasionally, they save the world.
Originally from the 51st Century, where sexuality is fluid and technology is advanced, Jack enjoys playing the exotic enigma and knowing things he shouldn't. On the surface, he is loud, flamboyant and flirtatious, always with a terrible pun or dirty joke to hand. Underneath, hundreds of years wear hard; Jack has been a soldier too many times and lost too many people. He's a strong leader who knows how to make hard decisions and kick serious ass, and he's perfectly happy to die for the cause; mostly because afterwards he'll get back up and keep on fighting. Jack enjoys projecting his issues, standing dramatically on top of very tall buildings, naked hide-and-go-seek, and exposition.
Sample Post:
I know what you're thinking. Guy like me: great body, high quality dentistry, killer fashion sense, you're wondering what I'm doing working in some kind of summer camp. Now I've been in a lot of positions before - and believe me, I mean a lot of positions, this one time I got stuck upside-down with my eyebrow tickling my thigh and if it hadn't been for the jar of motor oil in the boot who knows what could have happened! But I digress.
I'm here investigating claims of paranormal activity in your Camp. Ma'am, are you aware that many of your campers have been undergoing unusual physical changes? No, I'm not talking about puberty; I'm talking about the prevalence of deformed facial expressions and, quote unquote, chibification. Have you ever seen a guy with a mouth like a three turned sideways? Pray you never do. Not to mention the fact that I've only been here a day and I've got samples of half a dozen diseases found nowhere else on Earth, though I did encounter a more prolonged form of the gender reversal virus way out in Diomedes Nine a long time ago. Spent most of the day locked in my room... you ever considered marketing it?
Then there's the humanitarian aspect. One camper informed me you have them all stuck playing an eternal game that it's impossible to win. Another introduced me to some of the local flora and fauna - well, Marcy kinda introduced herself. About five times. Hell of a tentacle monster, that one! The report also mentions some campers have been manifesting sudden rains of rosepetals, pink clouds, and occasionally: sparkles. I'm afraid unless I see documentation of the involvement of Stephanie Meyers, I'm gonna have to declare this entire summer camp in breach of Directive 32, and a Weeaboo Singularity.
But hey, don't look upset! Nothing more tragic than a sad expression on a beautiful woman. See, a few months ago I received a letter inviting me to join your highly specialized team. Don't think I've ever been offered a job with such unique opportunities in Employee Relations. At the time... well, I was a little busy. Now? I'm willing to accept your offer, since it'll give me a chance to keep an ongoing watch on this place. Though uh, we may have to renegotiate some of the fine print. Resource Management I can handle, but I'm not so sure about this secondary position. It says, "Camp Target Practice"...?
IN with 98.2%
(re-apped with 4668 comments on 11.07.09.)