craptastic!
so it's been a interesting few days.
i think i'm single now. tiara and i sat down and had a long talk last night. we've been putting off talking for some time now. after much discussion (most of which is still a blur to me) we were left with 2 decisions, either put in our 30 day and move out, or seperate for a bit. either way it was decided that we need to take some time to figure out what direction we want to go in life and if our relationship is going to be a part of that. as much as i'd like to say it was a mutial thing, it kind of was more tiara then me. i really care about her a lot and i'm not quite sure what to do. it sounds ridiculous but i have a hard time picturing myself without her. i was under the impression that things were getting better. the argueing had been to a minimum and our sex life was finally going back to normal. i guess i keept hoping that our relationship would just go back to being great. and although she's having a hard time with me transioning, if it wasn't for her i don't think i would have had the confidence to be strong enough to start. ok, i'm going to stop now b/c i'm sure none of you want to keep reading about my feelings for her.
on another good note (sense the sarcasm?) i talked to underworks today about my binder. i ordered it a month ago and i still hadn't recived it and i never really got a straight answer on how long it was going to take to get to me. so i called them, and it turns out that they shipped it the day after i ordered it and i arrived in san diego on march 31. the guy said that if i didn't recive it then maybe my neighbors had. well, i talked to all them and they don't have it. so i'm back at square one, with no money and no binder. awesome! i knew i should have paid extra for expidited shipping.
so that's how things are in alex-land. i have to go clean b/c i told tiara i would, and for once i'm going to do it. i feel like i'm stuck in this "now what" mind frame. like my world is this big blank canvas that changes every minute.
i think i'm single now. tiara and i sat down and had a long talk last night. we've been putting off talking for some time now. after much discussion (most of which is still a blur to me) we were left with 2 decisions, either put in our 30 day and move out, or seperate for a bit. either way it was decided that we need to take some time to figure out what direction we want to go in life and if our relationship is going to be a part of that. as much as i'd like to say it was a mutial thing, it kind of was more tiara then me. i really care about her a lot and i'm not quite sure what to do. it sounds ridiculous but i have a hard time picturing myself without her. i was under the impression that things were getting better. the argueing had been to a minimum and our sex life was finally going back to normal. i guess i keept hoping that our relationship would just go back to being great. and although she's having a hard time with me transioning, if it wasn't for her i don't think i would have had the confidence to be strong enough to start. ok, i'm going to stop now b/c i'm sure none of you want to keep reading about my feelings for her.
on another good note (sense the sarcasm?) i talked to underworks today about my binder. i ordered it a month ago and i still hadn't recived it and i never really got a straight answer on how long it was going to take to get to me. so i called them, and it turns out that they shipped it the day after i ordered it and i arrived in san diego on march 31. the guy said that if i didn't recive it then maybe my neighbors had. well, i talked to all them and they don't have it. so i'm back at square one, with no money and no binder. awesome! i knew i should have paid extra for expidited shipping.
so that's how things are in alex-land. i have to go clean b/c i told tiara i would, and for once i'm going to do it. i feel like i'm stuck in this "now what" mind frame. like my world is this big blank canvas that changes every minute.