004: New Feathers

[captain_in_you]

So, this is a usual thing, then? New people... "New Feathers" I've heard you all say, arriving every month. Well, I guess it was me last time, so if any of you new arrivals need anything, just ask. I'm Captain Jack Harkness, and it'll be great to meet all of you.

[Private to the Doctor]
I've got a surprise for you.

Comments

[Private] // [Action]

[im_brilliant]

Quite right, that. Not that I know all the places you've been, but I'm sure there are a few surprises the universe has got left for the both of us. I wouldn't mind that at all.

[There's a slight hesitation, his hand twitching, as if he's unsure how to best behave in this situation. Jack is very different from all the others he'd ever traveled with before. From both the women and the men. He's painfully aware now that his feelings for him are like that of Grace and even Martha. The males he'd had accompanying him before were either too young, too preoccupied, or it just wasn't in their nature. The Doctor honestly didn't know how to best deal with this sort of knowledge, this chaotic jumble of feelings. He could handle the girls and their "crushes" but this... This was an entirely different entity.]

It's all right, Jack. Really it is. I'm just glad to know that I'll finally have it. It's a bit tedious at times doing things ah- "manually". I appreciate it.

[Finally, as if by its own accord, his fingers brush against the edge of Jack's face. It's a quick, fluttering motion, starting just behind his ear, trailing along his jaw, before his hand settles on his shoulder. He gives it a reassuring squeeze, though his gaze remains straight ahead.]

Thank you... I don't really know how to express my gratitude to you, to be honest.

[Private] // [Action]

[captain_in_you]

I've been around, but... there's always new places to see. Earth was just getting too small.

[He shakes his head, looking down.] Oh I dunno, Doctor. Sometimes it's good to do things... manually. [Did he manage to make that sound just a little dirty? Maybe!]

[As the Doctor touches his face, he freezes, his breath catching in his throat. Somehow, that fleeting caress seems more intimate than a kiss, causing his heart to pound. He swallows and tries to gather his thoughts, resisting the urge to just grab the Doctor and kiss him anyway.]

I can think of a lot of ways... [His grin and innuendo are both a bit weak.]

[Private] // [Action]

[im_brilliant]

[Looks him up and down via his peripheral vision, suppressing a shiver and slight apprehension as to what he might be implying.]

Oh, really now?

[The Doctor turns slightly to face him, regarding him curiously. His hand lingers on his shoulder for another instant before falling down to rest at his side. Fingers twitching slightly, he fidgets a bit as he debates his next course of action. He licks his lips, scanning, analyzing Jack again with a flicker of his eyes. While the idea of any "naughty" thought doesn't sit well in his stomach, he is serious about wanting to make it up to him. He still intends to keep to the promise he made in an earlier conversation as well. If playing along with this banter would be what it took to lead him there, then so bet it. He sighed softly, shifting in place. Finally, his lips curl in an amused smirk.]

Care to ah,- expand on that thought a bit, then, Captain?

[Private] // [Action]

[captain_in_you]

[Jack chuckles and shakes his head.] I'd much rather demonstrate but... [Turning to face the Doctor, he takes his hand and gently tugs it up to his lips, kissing his fingertips lightly before squeezing his fingers, keeping his gaze locked on the Doctor's.]

I want you to understand that I didn't make the trade for your screwdriver expecting anything from you. It was just for you, because I know it'll make you happy, and make things easier on you. You don't have to repay me or make things up to me in any way.

[Private] // [Action]

[im_brilliant]

[Breath hitching in his throat, the Doctor's deep brown eyes widen in surprise. His hearts race, his cooler body temperature warms slightly, if only for a moment. He has to use a large amount of willpower to keep his face from tinging pink.]

I'm not sure I understand what you mean by that... [Looks at him skeptically.] Since this whole mess I've done nothing but cause you grief and pain. And well... I'm surprised you still- ah, well - you still... treat me the way you do after all that. I don't like it. And only further adding to this debt I owe you will only make it necessary that I don't make light of my promise.

[He steps closer, bringing his free hand up to Jack's neck, brushing his fingers against his jaw. His gaze doesn't stray and he leans in, looking at him even more intently.] I don't even know what you want. Not in the slightest, as weird as that may be. So I want you to be perfectly honest, and tell me, what do you want, Jack?

[Private] // [Action]

[captain_in_you]

[The last thing Jack expected was an open invitation. He draws in a short breath, leaning closer to the Doctor. On the one hand, he could take advantage of this... it was everything he'd wanted, and the Doctor was offering freely.]

I want...

[His lips are only a breath away from the Doctor's now, and his hands come to rest lightly on the man's waist. He could tell him everything he wants to do with him, every dirty thought in his head, and perhaps something might even come of it this time. But what would that accomplish? Would the Doctor then feel that he'd satisfied his "debt," and fulfilled his promise to Jack? Would it be over and done with then?]

What I want...

[Jack doesn't want that. What he feels for the Doctor is more than just a fleeting lust, and he doesn't want this to just be some obligation. He forces himself to pull back, away from the Doctor's touch, stepping off the porch into the rain.]

What I want is for you to stop thinking you owe me a debt.

[Private] // [Action]

[im_brilliant]

[Hearts pounding so quickly, so loudly, he could practically feel the vibrations reverberating across his ribcage. He realizes then, that he hadn't taken a breath in several minutes. A short, quick, yet surprisingly warmed breath escapes his lips when he's drawn in so close. His eyes remain wide, desperate and searching. Nerves wracked, he lets his thumb brush lightly against his jaw.]

Jack...

[It escapes him like a sigh as Jack pulls away. The Doctor stands there a moment, more confused then ever. The confusion turns to petulance as steps out after him. He was always the one to run, to hold back, himself, and despite not knowing his exact thoughts, he had a pretty good idea what was going on at that instant. There was no way he was going to just let the tables turn like this. Jack was such an enigma to him, he was almost terrifying at times. Alien species could be figured out, humans could be read, but the Captain was on a completely different level. He was unreadable, unpredictable and spontaneous. The kinds of things that could drive any average Time Lord to madness. But the Doctor was beyond average at this point. He'd stepped well out of bounds before, having fallen in love with humans. Having broken thousands of laws all across the universe. He was beyond playing by the rules, anyone's rules, including at this point- his own.]

Please...

[There's a hurt look glinting in those deep brown eyes. The rain's slowly seeping into his clothes, dampening his hair, but he pays it no mind. Even the temperature doesn't affect him at all. His mind is entirely fixated on one particular thing. He touches Jack again, this time gripping him by his upper arm. The Doctor pulls him in close, his lips mere inches away from the shell of his ear. His breaths, cool and shallow, are close enough to tickle at his skin.]

I won't rest until I've given you something. Please, don't fight me. It's the last thing that I'd want. There's not a lot I can give, in this condition, but I know there must be at least one thing I can do. Just to show you... Show you that you are so much more important than you seem to think you are. Other than Jenny... You're all I've got now.

[His voice, already low and quiet, softens to a whisper.] I need you.

[Action]

[captain_in_you]

[Jack doesn't know what to do. On the one hand, he has the Doctor here, willing and offering whatever Jack wants. On the other, he doesn't want anything that happens between them to be just based on what the Doctor thinks he owes him.]

There was a time I'd have given anything to hear that from you.

[His body seems to be making the decision for him, arms wrapping around the Doctor's waist, pulling him closer. He can feel the rain dripping down the back of his collar, chilling him.]

I need you too, Doctor. But... I don't want anything from you that you think is an obligation. I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything.

[He's leaning closer, seemingly without thought.] Anything that happens with us... I want it to happen because you want it too.

[Action]

[im_brilliant]

[Eyes darting around, searching his expression, trying so desperately hard to read him. But it seems even his Time Lord gifts are useless here. He is so incredibly lost. And in so many ways, as well. ]

Now, don't you try to negate the ah-necessity of what I feel towards you, Jack...

[The Doctor flinches a moment, then holds still until the flight reaction passes. He lets Jack pull him in, and returns the favor in a way by shifting to allow closer contact. His hands find themselves against Jack's shoulders, but not so much defensively as just needing a proper and appropriate place to put them. He strums his fingers there a moment, chewing his bottom lip as his gaze goes astray. A low, thoughtful click of the tongue indicates that he's working so very hard to process all that is flooding his mind at that particular second. His eyes then finally meet Jack's again.]

This...thing business, though I'm not sure we should even call it that, as I'm not really much of a 'thing' person, and can't allow myself to get to attached, as I'm sure you already know something always goes horribly wrong and I suppose while you can't, ah, die on me there's a plethora of other things that can occur, and while you know what happened with Rose, there were also others so many others and I can't even go back and make things right with even half of them, not to mention how wrong you are and how this would be...

[He's rambling now out of fear, his heartbeats faster and faster, He fears what's going to happen, and he's afraid of what he feels and how he should feel. Despite having done so much, knowing so much, this all is entirely new territory for him and it's got him absolutely terrified.]

It's just... I'm over all that from before. Past is past, yes? And I suppose there are worse things we could be doing... [His eyebrows go up at that.] All I know is right now, you're here and I'm here and we're both so alive... I can't even imagine... Oh, I don't even really know. Guess what I'm trying to say and am doing absolutely poorly at doing so is.... [He's leaning in so close now, his lips brush against Jack's jawline as he speaks. One hand has found its way to stroke his neck.] That right now, this moment in time, whenever it actually is. I wouldn't mind doing something with you. Whatever it is that you want. It's not out of obligation. I just... want it. [This is as close as he can manage to expressing a desire to be with him, as that sensation is completely foreign and after Rose, it's left him slightly apprehensive.] I won't just leave you again.

[Action]

[captain_in_you]

[Jack feels the Doctor's body tense as he pulls closer, and oh, the Doctor just had to remind him of how wrong he is...]

You might say you're over it, but... [He sighs and rests his forehead against the Doctor's, shaking his head. The Doctor is here, with him, offering whatever Jack wants, and all Jack can think is how much it's going to hurt when the Doctor does leave him.]

But didn't he just say that he wouldn't?

I don't think you know what you're offering me, Doctor. [Forcing a smile, he tries not to shiver at the feeling of the Doctor's lips against his jaw, though his wings flutter slightly. He doesn't think the Doctor realizes that Jack's resisting the urge to drag him back into the house, into the bedroom, to show him exactly what he wants to do with him.] And you say you won't leave me again, but then you said it was just this moment, and you still say I'm wrong and this is wrong and... I don't know what you're doing to me.

[Despite his best efforts, he's been holding the Doctor close as he talks, his lips only a breath away. He knows he shouldn't, he knows he'll only be hurt later, he knows he's too broken for this, but... the Doctor is offering, and who is he to resist temptation? Closing the gap, he kisses him deeply as the rain pours down harder over them.]

[Action]

[im_brilliant]

[He kisses him back, almost absently and thoughtlessly for a moment. His hands stroke his back, his neck, his hair. For several reasons, namely the nagging feeling of apprehension, he's still holding back. Despite clearly knowing he shouldn't be at this point. But even still, he doesn't want to lose himself or let his guard down. As much as he may trust Jack, he doesn't trust most of the people who could be lurking around.]

[The Doctor pulls away just a little, one hand bracing his neck, the other cupping his face. He looks into his eyes, his own haunted by the ghosts of his past. He's finally processed all of what was just said to him. A low murmur escapes his lips then, his breaths warm compared to the chilled air of the rain.] Just... Trust me, Jack.

[He kisses him, then, and is far more aggressive about it. Fierce determination combined with rehashed adrenaline and sublimating his flight reflex into, well, this, has brought out his slightly more imposing nature. However, a fierce kiss from him, may still seem chaste from Jack's perspective. It's still hot and open-mouthed, and his hands are touching all over, but he's not quite caved enough into his oral fixative tendencies to do anything with his tongue. He's a bit too nervous for that at the moment. Finally, he pulls back again, and decides to be fixated on Jack's ear instead, in which he demonstrates by licking lightly at his earlobe.]

Why don't we take this inside? [He muses this lightly, running his hands along Jack's now soaked shoulders.] Go dry off and resume all this where it's nice and warm. You're rather clever, I'm sure you can think of a good spot.

[Of course he's just thinking perhaps curling up on the couch or in his room, talking about things, and perhaps kiss some more. Time Lords have an infinite array of all sorts of knowledge embedded in their minds. Forays of the bedroom? Not really one of them.]

[Action]

[captain_in_you]

[Trust... such a small word, but something so difficult for Jack. In his long life, there were very few people whom he could say he truly could trust, but... this man is one of them, despite everything that had happened.]

[He kisses him hard, passionately, barely flicking the tip of his tongue over the Doctor's lower lip. One hand slides higher on the Doctor's back, brushing the base of his wings, pressing their bodies closer together. He's panting softly by the time the Doctor pulls away, and he can't suppress the shiver this time when the other nibbles on his earlobe.]

Probably a good idea. We really should... get out of these wet clothes. [A smirk... oh, there's dirty thoughts playing in the Captain's mind right now.] Back inside, then? [He takes a step back, running his hand down the Doctor's arm to grasp his hand.]

[Action]

[im_brilliant]

Inside we go, yes. [Nods, taking his hand loosely.] Sur notre chemin~!

[Leads him back into the house and pats himself down, figuring out what's wet and what isn't. The coat's definitely the worst off, so that gets hung up to dry. Good thing it's of good quality as that took most of the water. His suit jacket is also a little wet so he removes and hangs that as well. Shirt and pants, however, aren't so bad that a few minutes inside and they would become comfortable again. The squishy feeling of wet shoes is also something that would go away soon. Now with a burst of energy, the Doctor shuffles around idly, looking at Jack.]

So! [He glances between the sofa in the living room and the direction of the bedrooms.] Where to, Captain?

[Action]

[captain_in_you]

[Jack slips out of his coat as well, and kicks off his boots by the door. His top shirt is a bit damp as well, so he shrugs off his bracers and unbuttons it quickly, dropping it absently in a heap, leaving himself in only his trousers and white t-shirt. The hems of his trousers were wet too, but he decides not to strip out of those... yet.]

Come on. [Reaching out, he takes the Doctor's hand and leads him toward his bedroom. This is a bad idea, a really, phenomenally, cosmically bad idea, but he's wanted it for so long, and he can't keep saying no.]

[Action]

[im_brilliant]

[The Doctor quirks a brow at that but decides to say nothing for the moment, merely following him to his room instead. He knew Jack was relatively shameless, but the extent of that was something still a mystery to him. Upon entering the room, he leans back against the wall, hands folded loosely behind him, rocking on his heels slowly. He continues to look at Jack with a cross between an inquisitive and generally amused expression.]

I suppose this is a rather interesting choice on your part. [Smirk.] Any particular ideas you've got, there?

[Action]

[captain_in_you]

Hey, you suggested it. Sort of. [Jack idly wonders if he should have chosen the couch, but he's not second-guessing himself now. Stepping forward, he runs his hands down the Doctor's arms to grip his elbows, pulling him close again.] And I've got lots of ideas. Whatever I want, yeah?

[He leans down to kiss the Doctor again, though he keeps his eyes open till the last moment, watching for signs of hesitation or uncertainty.]