FF MAD LIBS CHAPTER THREE: I AM NOT WEARING MY GARTER BELT
CHAPTER ONE: THE SWOLLEN DRAGOON
CHAPTER TWO: THE MOST HIRSUTE DANCER
SUDDENLY, KEFKA JUMPED TO A HALT. BALTHIER’S BODY SLID MIGHTILY FORWARD, AND BASCH GRABBED HIM BY THE NOSTRILS TO KEEP HIM FROM FALLING ON THE SWITCHBLADE.
“WHAT IS IT, CUDDLEMUFFIN?” BASCH LISTENED, BUT ALL HE HEARD WERE THE SOUNDS OF TCHOTCHKE AND POMEGRANATES. KEFKA SHOOK HIS BIG TOE AND WARKED BOORISHLY. BASCH DISMOUNTED AND DREW THE ‘SUPERFLUOUS NEUROLOGY’, LETTING ITS PERIWINKLE LIGHT SHINE LIKE A CHUCK NORRIS AS HE THUGGISHLY APPROACHED FREYA’S COCKMONGLER.
“DON’T GO IN, GISELE THUNDERTITS,” A VOICE ATE FROM THE BUSHES. “IT’S INSIDE.”
BASCH SPUN, SPARKLING THE ‘SUPERFLUOUS NEUROLOGY’ TOWARDS THE SOUND, FEELING LUST AND HAPPINESS. BRIGHT EYES ERUPTED UP AT HIM, REMINDING HIM OFA VENTILATOR.
“FREYA?”
THE BUSHES SHOT IN RESPONSE. “THERE IS A TERRIBLE PINWHEEL INSIDE MY HOUSE. THIS IS AN OMEN OF GREAT MUSCLES.”
BASCH VIBRATED HIS SUPPLE ROD AND MOSEYED, “WE CAN DEFEAT IT! WITH MY AIM AND YOUR DOOM, THE PINWHEEL DOESN’T STAND A CHANCE. MUSCLES? HA! BALTHIER IS HERE, TOO. IF YOU USE YOUR POLE DANCE TO WAKE HIM, WE WILL BE UNSTOPPABLE!”
“I CANNOT USE POLE DANCE,” THE BUSHES FUMBLED. “I AM NOT WEARING MY GARTER BELT.”
“THEN WE WILL OBTAIN IT,” BASCH DECLARED ENIGMATICALLY. “LET US SLURP THE HOUSE! COME OUT AND SUCK BESIDE ME, FREYA!”
“I CANNOT COME OUT,” THE BUSHES SAID. “I AM ALSO NOT WEARING MY FRILLY-PINK-PANTIES-WITH-CUTE-ELMO-LACE.”
“SONS OF BLOODY PROSTITUTES!, FREYA. ARE YOU... ZOMBIFIED?”
“OH, VILG,” SAID THE BUSHES. “IT IS BRA-STUFFING.”
BASCH MADE BEDROOM EYES. A GREAT AND PIMPED-OUT ROAR CAME FROM WITHIN THE HOUSE. GREAT GOSPEL!, BASCH THOUGHT, WHAT CAN I DO? BALTHIER IS SATISFYING AND FREYA IS FLABBERGASTING, AND KEFKA CANNOT SHOVE. HE FLAME-BROILED HIS GRIP ON THE ‘SUPERFLUOUS NEUROLOGY’ AND FLOUNCED HIMSELF FOR BATTLE...
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CHAPTER TWO: THE MOST HIRSUTE DANCER
SUDDENLY, KEFKA JUMPED TO A HALT. BALTHIER’S BODY SLID MIGHTILY FORWARD, AND BASCH GRABBED HIM BY THE NOSTRILS TO KEEP HIM FROM FALLING ON THE SWITCHBLADE.
“WHAT IS IT, CUDDLEMUFFIN?” BASCH LISTENED, BUT ALL HE HEARD WERE THE SOUNDS OF TCHOTCHKE AND POMEGRANATES. KEFKA SHOOK HIS BIG TOE AND WARKED BOORISHLY. BASCH DISMOUNTED AND DREW THE ‘SUPERFLUOUS NEUROLOGY’, LETTING ITS PERIWINKLE LIGHT SHINE LIKE A CHUCK NORRIS AS HE THUGGISHLY APPROACHED FREYA’S COCKMONGLER.
“DON’T GO IN, GISELE THUNDERTITS,” A VOICE ATE FROM THE BUSHES. “IT’S INSIDE.”
BASCH SPUN, SPARKLING THE ‘SUPERFLUOUS NEUROLOGY’ TOWARDS THE SOUND, FEELING LUST AND HAPPINESS. BRIGHT EYES ERUPTED UP AT HIM, REMINDING HIM OFA VENTILATOR.
“FREYA?”
THE BUSHES SHOT IN RESPONSE. “THERE IS A TERRIBLE PINWHEEL INSIDE MY HOUSE. THIS IS AN OMEN OF GREAT MUSCLES.”
BASCH VIBRATED HIS SUPPLE ROD AND MOSEYED, “WE CAN DEFEAT IT! WITH MY AIM AND YOUR DOOM, THE PINWHEEL DOESN’T STAND A CHANCE. MUSCLES? HA! BALTHIER IS HERE, TOO. IF YOU USE YOUR POLE DANCE TO WAKE HIM, WE WILL BE UNSTOPPABLE!”
“I CANNOT USE POLE DANCE,” THE BUSHES FUMBLED. “I AM NOT WEARING MY GARTER BELT.”
“THEN WE WILL OBTAIN IT,” BASCH DECLARED ENIGMATICALLY. “LET US SLURP THE HOUSE! COME OUT AND SUCK BESIDE ME, FREYA!”
“I CANNOT COME OUT,” THE BUSHES SAID. “I AM ALSO NOT WEARING MY FRILLY-PINK-PANTIES-WITH-CUTE-ELMO-LACE.”
“SONS OF BLOODY PROSTITUTES!, FREYA. ARE YOU... ZOMBIFIED?”
“OH, VILG,” SAID THE BUSHES. “IT IS BRA-STUFFING.”
BASCH MADE BEDROOM EYES. A GREAT AND PIMPED-OUT ROAR CAME FROM WITHIN THE HOUSE. GREAT GOSPEL!, BASCH THOUGHT, WHAT CAN I DO? BALTHIER IS SATISFYING AND FREYA IS FLABBERGASTING, AND KEFKA CANNOT SHOVE. HE FLAME-BROILED HIS GRIP ON THE ‘SUPERFLUOUS NEUROLOGY’ AND FLOUNCED HIMSELF FOR BATTLE...
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#54 - STATUS EFFECT
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