My Summer Workout Plan
The other day I was doing inventory on my personal life, and I decided that I need a makeover. I don't have a job. I barely go out and get wild. And worst of all, I don't have a boyfriend. Right now, I am a big fat lame dork! Dork, dork, dork, dork..DORK! Oh my God, I've become the very person I used to make fun of. Anyway, I've made up my mind to rearrange some things in my life, and turn myself into a confident, sexy, cool-as-a-cucumber blonde. Here is my Summer to-do-list as follows:
1. Lose 20 pounds. There's no reason why I can't be 5'7 and 110 pounds. Note to self: no more late night "feel sorry for myself" ice cream binges. Also, will work out for at least 35 minutes in the pool everyday.
2. Correct any personal imperfections i.e. blemishes. Will use acne medication regularly this time.
3. Maintain my tan. No more slacking off. It's 7 minutes in the stand up booth, 3 days a week.
4. Drink 8 glasses of water a day and never, under any circumstances, drink a regular caffeinated drink (besides tonight).
5. Attempt to quit smoking.
6. Stop biting nails and have manicures and pedicures, at the very least, once a month.
7. Get a job to help pay shopping bills. Note: Job must be somewhere of substantial class. (No more grocery stores).
8. And finally, find a nice, reasonably good looking boy that is not a meat-head, prick, or combination of the above, to become my future boyfriend.
And there you have it. Operation New Christine has officially begun. I am going to abide by my goals for a month and if 6 out of the 8 goals have not been accomplished I will commit suicide. Note: suicide note to follow later
1. Lose 20 pounds. There's no reason why I can't be 5'7 and 110 pounds. Note to self: no more late night "feel sorry for myself" ice cream binges. Also, will work out for at least 35 minutes in the pool everyday.
2. Correct any personal imperfections i.e. blemishes. Will use acne medication regularly this time.
3. Maintain my tan. No more slacking off. It's 7 minutes in the stand up booth, 3 days a week.
4. Drink 8 glasses of water a day and never, under any circumstances, drink a regular caffeinated drink (besides tonight).
5. Attempt to quit smoking.
6. Stop biting nails and have manicures and pedicures, at the very least, once a month.
7. Get a job to help pay shopping bills. Note: Job must be somewhere of substantial class. (No more grocery stores).
8. And finally, find a nice, reasonably good looking boy that is not a meat-head, prick, or combination of the above, to become my future boyfriend.
And there you have it. Operation New Christine has officially begun. I am going to abide by my goals for a month and if 6 out of the 8 goals have not been accomplished I will commit suicide. Note: suicide note to follow later