just some thoughts, really.
I just stood up in my room and went to the wall behind me and stretched. I saw an itty-bitty cutout of the word "Love", with a double exposed picture of me kissing Stef. Its interesting.
There, I was nobody. But in the same instant, I was also completely not who I normally was. No one other than the few guys from my troop really know who I was, or what i was like. That may be a big unfair, I had spent like 2 weeks with all the guys from the contingent. Butr still. I walked among the green Scottish grass as a paradox: A No body, and yet, someone soundly unique and important in their own right. I was just some kid, AND, Cap'n Commie. An American AND 'Sunbeam'.
I'm not sure exactly what I'm getting at, just that I am suddenly aware of this odd duality then. I was someone different there, and while that trip as a whole has changed who I am, and added into my [sub]conscience and outlook... I'm not who I was on that trip, and maybe its just regret or a desire to be that E-Jay again. It was a great feeling. Walking around an international crowd wearing an airplane blanket cape and a shirt proudly displaying the hammer and sickle, adorned with leather and spikes.
I miss sara.
The idea of being different versions of yourself at different times in your personal history is an interesting one, indeed.
MMMmmmmm..... Thought.
Divine Thought.
How I Love it so.
There, I was nobody. But in the same instant, I was also completely not who I normally was. No one other than the few guys from my troop really know who I was, or what i was like. That may be a big unfair, I had spent like 2 weeks with all the guys from the contingent. Butr still. I walked among the green Scottish grass as a paradox: A No body, and yet, someone soundly unique and important in their own right. I was just some kid, AND, Cap'n Commie. An American AND 'Sunbeam'.
I'm not sure exactly what I'm getting at, just that I am suddenly aware of this odd duality then. I was someone different there, and while that trip as a whole has changed who I am, and added into my [sub]conscience and outlook... I'm not who I was on that trip, and maybe its just regret or a desire to be that E-Jay again. It was a great feeling. Walking around an international crowd wearing an airplane blanket cape and a shirt proudly displaying the hammer and sickle, adorned with leather and spikes.
I miss sara.
The idea of being different versions of yourself at different times in your personal history is an interesting one, indeed.
MMMmmmmm..... Thought.
Divine Thought.
How I Love it so.