The ship was sunk in a wave of spunk from too much fornication
I am more tired than I've ever been in my life. I feel like I'm in such an emotional rut, and even though I'm subbing and doing stuff with my church band, I'm so bored. I just feel disconnected like my life is on standby and every time I try to start it up the ignition won't turn. I miss so many little thins that I took for granted. I just feel stagnant, like I'm just being held here. I don't know exactly what will make it better. I have some ideas, but I don't know when those will become readily available.
I have all these friends who have got their life together, and I'm just waiting and waiting to go do something that is exciting, but petrifying. I can't do it alone, and I don't want too. Am I losing what little edge I have. I'm not doing anything except working out to better myself. I have to make money and I can't do a show cuz it won't pay enough money if I do.
I'm just tired of everything here. I'm tired of this town, this room, this walking around like a ghost. Last weekend was one of he first normal nights I've had in a long time as far as being comfortable and at ease. Everything else has been weird. I hate being alone all the time, and I can't remember the last time I felt so alone. It's the kind of alone where I don't want to be bothered. I don't want to go anywhere, or see a bunch of people. It's fucked up and awful.
This part just needs to be done now so the good parts can start. Everything good seems so far away.
I have all these friends who have got their life together, and I'm just waiting and waiting to go do something that is exciting, but petrifying. I can't do it alone, and I don't want too. Am I losing what little edge I have. I'm not doing anything except working out to better myself. I have to make money and I can't do a show cuz it won't pay enough money if I do.
I'm just tired of everything here. I'm tired of this town, this room, this walking around like a ghost. Last weekend was one of he first normal nights I've had in a long time as far as being comfortable and at ease. Everything else has been weird. I hate being alone all the time, and I can't remember the last time I felt so alone. It's the kind of alone where I don't want to be bothered. I don't want to go anywhere, or see a bunch of people. It's fucked up and awful.
This part just needs to be done now so the good parts can start. Everything good seems so far away.