[Private Journal Entry # 14]
... journal, I'm afraid this might be my last entry in you. I'll be leaving soon. What are the emotions that are coursing through my mind, you ask? Apprehensive. Afraid. Guilty. And perhaps... just the least bit... excited? After all, Mitsuki-sensei is almost done - almost ready to become a lich. He just needs to drain a bit more duel energy...
I wonder if my friends will miss me. I wonder how Tsubasa is doing - he surely deserves a better girl than me - someone who'll truly love him and who he'll love in return. Mon will be by his side, no doubt. Perhaps new fantasy heroes will be released after I'm gone; I'm sure they'll be fanboying in glee, hmm~ :) I wonder how Seku-san is doing too. Hopefully he's not in pain anymore... I swear, he made me worry from the minute I met him. But... still. He accepted me with an open mind and open arms... and I'm glad I've got to see him smile at least once 'cause it's really beautiful when that boy smiles. And Hisaki - maybe she'll grow strong and get over her parent's murder. Maybe she and Sousei-san will marry when they grow up. And maybe Chieko... do I even want to kill her anymore? I... hm. I'll spare her life. Yukio never liked killing.
I wonder if Kyousuke-niisan and Gin-chan and Ottousan and Okassan... will they care if I'm gone? Giniro, I wonder if... what are you thinking Gin? Are you ever going to recover? I'm sorry I've used you... and ... hmm, I've never opened the box he gave me via Kyousuke either. Speaking of whom, I've hurt Kyousuke too. My 'niisan really wanted me to finish my final year at Duel Academia - he sacrificed so much for me to stay here, but living here... pretending to be a human being among real ones ... I feel as if it's almost insulting to them. For 17 years I've tried to be somebody I'm not - I'll never able to change myself - who I really am and what I really want to do. But I'll be out of their way now. My family and friends will survive along without me - they'll grow stronger and stronger and one day - they'll sprout their own wings and take flight into the endless sky. Their future looks bright even as I type this now, journal.
And as for me, Mitsuki and I can live together for all eternity, free from all human suffering and desires. After all, it's what my father truly wanted.
Ne, my dear Fuminori, wouldn't this be what you wanted too?
Maybe this is all for the best.
...
Yes. Perhaps it just is.
Yours truly,
Saya