You're A Hard Man To Buy For

[gamma_bitch]

WHO: hulkkeysmash and gamma_bitch
WHERE: The most festive lab on the planet.
WHEN: Foreward dated to Christmas Eve
WARNINGS: Adorableness
SUMMARY: Betty gives Bruce his Christmas present!
FORMAT: Quicklog!

Comments

[hulkkeysmash]

[ he yelps, dropping his pen as he's forcibly pulled from his train of thought. He'd gotten into his work, hunkered down with a thoroughly chewed #2 pencil and a stack of yellow legal pads. Bruce is always working on something, but today he has more of a problem than usual. It's big, it's fruity, and apparently it's eating people. This is problematic, to say the least.

This is why he'd forgotten about dinner with Betty---or that it's Christmas Eve at all. Fumbling to push his glasses up, he cracks an expression of contrition. ]

Be---? Oh. Oh. Oh, Betty, I'm so sorry.

[gamma_bitch]

[She rolls her eyes at him, unbuttoning her coat and tossing it over a free chair, straightening out her very cute and very expensive dress with a snort.]

God if you can forget it's fucking Christmas, Bruce, I won't get my hopes up on my birthday.

[She sighs and drops onto a stool next to him, crossing her legs daintily, hands on her knees. She relaxes a little, seeming to brush off her irritation with a resigned sort of expression.]

What's outranking me this year? The rampaging fruitcakes or something else?

[hulkkeysmash]

[ he scrubs his fingers through his hair; it's unwashed, sticking up at weird angles. It'd be bedhead, but he hasn't slept. Not for a while. Guilt rushes up the back of his throat, sour and sick. He's disappointed Betty---again. He's surprised that she came to see him at all; she used to just send him a very curt email listing his crimes against her in numerical order.

But she's here, in a---a very short little dress. It hits just above mid-thigh, barely a dress, really. Bruce swallows dryly ]

The fruitcake is my fault.

[gamma_bitch]

Not ALL your fault. Let Jan work on it for a while and take a break before your brain explodes.

[She strode over and tussled his hair a little, sighing in irritation]

I had a present for you to open you know.

[hulkkeysmash]

I started it. I think I started it, at least.

[ he rubs his hands over his eyes beneath his glasses, leaning into Betty's nicely manicured nails ]

I...I forgot that it's Christmas. I'm so terrible. I'm sorry. I've---I've really screwed this one up again, haven't I? Am I in the dog house again?

[gamma_bitch]

[Betty hesitates, trying not to laugh at his phrasing.]

If you are you'll have company. Wait here okay?

[She ceases the headscratching and strides out of the room to where she's left Bruce's present, dopily sniffing her winter boots in the foyer. Scooping him up she carries him into the lap, scratching under his jowly little chin and making his tail slap happily back and forth.]

This is for you. You need something a little more interactive than a cactus to take care of, get your mind out of the paperwork a little.

[The basset hound puppy stares at Bruce from Betty's arms with sleepyish eyes.]

[hulkkeysmash]

[ Bruce stares, open-mouthed, when she returns with a big eyed, flop-eared little puppy. It can't be more than three or four months old, loose skin bunched up around its jowls as it looks plaintively up at him. It looks like something Walt Disney would put into a feature film: its feet are at least three times bigger than they have any right to be and its ears could help it set sail. It's a miserable little creature, but adorable because of its own homeliness.

Bruce has to focus on deep breathing to keep himself from recoiling ]

Oh. Oh, I couldn't possibly...

[gamma_bitch]

You can science sentient fruitcake into existence, Bruce. I'm sure you can figure out how to take care of a dog.

[Betty smiles as she steps up and places the puppy right on Bruce's lap, where he wags his whole body and snuffles at his new master's labcoat, pawing him curiously with occassional plaintive whines.

Betty's expression is locked in a firm warm smile, underscored with a touch of 'I'm not letting you argue your way out of this'.]

[hulkkeysmash]

[ Betty's giving him that look that means he doesn't have a say in things anymore. The puppy makes soft whuffles and whines, its body vibrating in happiness as it finds his hand to lick. Its tongue is small, soft, and warm. Bruce looks down at the dog in his lap, overwhelmed, and touches the top of its head. Its ear is silky. He's dissecting it into its parts, judging it for what threat it poses to his life ]

Does it have a name?

[gamma_bitch]

Not yet. I thought you'd want to see what his personality is like first. But he's very sweet. He's been at my place for two days before now. He sleeps a lot.

[She steps a little closer and strokes the puppy's soft head a few times, at which he closes his eyes in pleaseure.]

He won't get very big, or need too much running around and exercise, but he's very affectionate. I think he's perfect for you.

[hulkkeysmash]

I've never had a pet before. I don't know...most animals don't react well to me, Betty. You know that.

[ dogs regularly whine at him on the street or cower and wet themselves. Even as a man, he's still "Hulk" ]

[gamma_bitch]

He didn't react badly to ME and I'm as much Hulk as you are now.

[She frowns a little, laying a hand on his shoulder.]

He's just a puppy Bruce. He's impressionable. I you treat him properly while he's young he'll always like you. Besides, he's in your lap and he's fine. Look at him.

[The puppy yawned hugely as if to punctuate Betty's point, then popped up to lean his paws on Bruce's chest, sniffing and then licking his cheek]