WHO: Terra Branford and Keith Anyan
WHERE: The City! Somewhere.
WHEN: Today
WARNINGS: Schizophrenic genre switches and mood swings, magic gone awry, hideous hideous hideous.
WHAT: Everything is broken forever. By which I mean human souls are reclaimed, a chance encounter turns this into a bad soap opera, more hideous.
WORDS: yes
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but that would be redundant. )
...he had other things to worry about.
No amount of fending off rabid toasters could entirely distract him from the fact that he felt different. A little mellow, a little light-headed--he was still half-convinced someone had drugged him, but it had lasted over two days now, so that couldn't be it. And besides...it didn't feel like he'd been drugged, not really. It felt like a weight of pressing hatred had been lifted just a little off his shoulders. It felt like he liked the world around him and its people enough to breathe deeply for once.
Such was the mood he was in when he found himself sitting on a bench in a small park, watching the people go by and realizing that for once, he didn't feel so lonely. For once, he didn't hate everything. In fact, he almost caught himself smiling at that green-haired girl as she wandered by. Almost.
He did still feel kind of stoned, though. Or would if he knew what stoned felt like.
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What did she want? To protect people, yes. To keep people from fighting, of course. To prevent needless hurt, there was no doubt about that. But those things were not easy to acquire when the forces between which she was permanently caught, a liaison by circumstance of her birth, were not at odds here. The one half didn't even have presence here, aside from within her.
And it was that half that separated her from what she wanted most. To know "love"... that was why Aphrodite had given her the ring her thumb played with. She halfway torn between giving up and ripping the trinket off, to toss it into the trees - or between simply closing her eyes and twisting the gem, bringing the enchantment to life with whomever she stumbled upon.
That such a person seemed to be watching her gave her pause. Sure, Terra was used to garnering attention sometimes when she went out, but not from people she recognized.
She had seen that man's face before, hadn't she? Slowing her pace to an eventual stop, Terra turned her attention to the man on the bench.
"Excuse me," she said lightly, eyebrows drawn in confusion, but not unkindly, "but do I know you from somewhere?"
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And then one of them approached him: that girl with the green hair. He thought, reflexively, of shutting her out--glaring at her and giving a terse response. That was what he would normally do. Why not do the same thing now?
Because he no longer felt like he needed to be so alone. It was a subtle change, but it was there.
So instead of a glare, he turned solemn and unjudging eyes on Terra. He recognized her voice. "We've spoken on the network," he said. "My name is Keith Anyan. You're...Terra." It felt strange still to call a person by that name and not the planet they were on.
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"Yes, I am." She could have just continued on, with that minor curiosity satisfied, but... perhaps what she wanted was a conversation, and not a battle. It wasn't as though there were many people she felt she could talk to, anyway-Jomy was still abroad, Zelgadis would give her deadpan looks and probably change the subject, and trying to talk to her teammates made Terra feel like even more of a lost child. While probably not the best choice for conversation, there still existed between them some common ground.
Regardless, she still hesitated before finally gesturing to Keith's bench. "Do you mind if I...?"
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If he'd known that the girl in front of him considered Jomy Marcus Shin a friend, even in his current mood he might have turned her away. But he was oblivious (to that as to so many other things regarding interpersonal relationships). So he simply glanced at the empty seat next to him. "...I don't mind," he said after a moment. "I think..." He spoke even more slowly now. This was entirely new territory. "I would appreciate the company."
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She took the seat beside him with a returned smile and a quiet "thank you," hands folding on her knees. For a time she was silent, unsure of herself and her place, watching the others in the park as Keith had done before her arrival. Though there were a few people walking alone, her attention always lingered on those who did not; she was not alone, but the sight made her feel lonely, and she was quick to turn her attention back to Keith. "Have you been well?"
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...but on another level, it soothed him. Which was why he said nothing to push Terra away, and he even honestly answered her question. "I believe...I've been better than usual. I'm not aware why."
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She scuffed one foot against the ground, her gaze shifting from him to no space in particular with a tilt of her head. "But why... I don't know. It's hard to know what to feel here, or how..."
Absently, her fingers fussed with the ring on her right hand, a nervous gesture, but still managed a smile. "... I hope your 'better than usual' lasts."
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And yet...
It probably helped that Terra was someone he barely knew. Keith had only discussed philosophical matters with her--never really anything about himself. She was safe. So he ventured a little more: "That's what I was taught. I have every reason to believe it."
But for once, he wasn't sure if he should.
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It had only gotten more difficult here, where she wasn't on the run, wasn't some central piece to a conflict she could barely comprehend. Of course, Keith couldn't know something like that. "Amnesia," she added by way of explanation. "But... being able to feel, and knowing what it is... isn't that what it means to be human?"
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Her next question struck home. Was that what it meant to be human, after all? Maybe she was right--
--and maybe, just maybe, that wasn't such a bad thing. He opened his mouth to tentatively acknowledge this...
...and then stopped.
The Spark faded, leaving his usual human soul, all curled up and shut in on itself, in its place.
He stiffened, suddenly acutely aware that he'd allowed someone to violate his self-imposed isolation, suddenly hating himself all the more for it. "Yes," he said, his voice suddenly ten degrees colder (at the very least). "That's what we must suppress. Learn it while you can. Only monsters give in to their feelings."
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But which was more dangerous? The power she held as a monster, or the abuses of her power committed by the people who once controlled her?
"I... I was more of a monster..." she started, hesitant; her voice was quiet, and she could not meet his eye. "... When I couldn't feel at all."
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But her words caught him off guard. He stared at her. Finally, he said, "You said it yourself. You know nothing. You can't make such a judgment. Until you've experienced human feelings and seen the destruction they wreak--"
He stood up. "Then you'll wish you could return to feeling nothing."
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But he was right. She didn't know. She couldn't know. She was incapable of knowing for sure, as she was now. Until she experienced feelings for herself... how could she know what way was right?
But he was also wrong. And... she could prove it.
Terra's fingers hadn't left their idle play with the ring on her right hand, so the nervous gesture changed little between twisting the band back and forth and twisting the gem itself. She didn't brace herself for the effect of that magic, took no deep breaths and no steeled nerves. She just wanted to know.
"You're wrong, Keith Anyan." She too rose from the bench, though at her height it was hardly as impressive as his stance. It felt like her heart had suddenly swollen up with pounds of weight in her chest, heavy with new sensations she didn't understand. Trying to speak to him made her words catch in her throat; just standing near him made her knees feel weak.
When she finally looked up to meet his face, her cheeks were flushed pink and her hands shaking. "I would never wish for that."
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He denied it well, though. As he looked down at Terra, his face was a cold mask of contempt and dismissal. He started to turn and leave her there--broken, he assumed, and unlikely to attempt to step past his barriers in the future--when something stopped him in his tracks.
Keith had no idea what it was. He just knew that it was a feeling that started at the base of his ribcage and fluttered upwards. It felt warm, in a more intimate way than whatever strange thing had possessed him for the past few days did. It felt...
...like he didn't want to walk away from Terra anymore. Ever.
He stared at her, mute, as he began to go pink in the face himself.
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She wanted to be closer to him. She wanted him to say something, anything - to say her name, and to mean her, not the home he had left behind. Cupping her hands over her smiling cheeks, she wanted to know if the flush of his would feel as warm to the touch.
Even as she tried to hide herself from his gaze, from the newness of everything welling up inside her, she couldn't tear her eyes away from him, either. It wasn't just hypothetical anymore-her wants were no longer for the abstracts, but for something that actually existed.
And was standing right there. In front of her. Staring back at her.
Even if she couldn't decide whether to move forward or to run away, Terra was sure she'd never felt happier in her life.
... not that that said much, considering she didn't even have a full year's worth of memories and emotions to her name.
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