Series VII
Ahem. Good afternoon, all. Arnold J. Rimmer here, with an exciting offer you can't afford to miss.
Tired of the gloom and doom? Stressed out by the sudden 'ripped away from home' situation? Wondering what tomorrow will bring? Wanting something a little bit cute and cuddly, but you're afraid you won't be able to give it walkies while the City is being attacked?
Well, fret no longer. I introduce to you Bark!
Bark is the perfect home companion. He recognizes several commands, and responds to the sound of your voice. He'll even watch for intruders if you set him at the door. With 7 gigs of memory standard in each unit, you can even use him to store your media files, like video and music. He's the cutest damn iPod you'll ever own.
Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "Arnie, that must cost a fortune! My vigilantism doesn't bring in enough to afford this sort of toy."
So, if you purchase right now through our special BuyChum account [linked here], you'll receive a special discounted rate. Only $29.95, no shipping and handling charges or taxes apply.
Operators are standing by.
((OKAY! Remember the robo doggies from this post? Well, they've been perfected, they do everything as advertised, and certain people (Hodge) think that they're mutant trackers. In reality, they do no such thing, so if you took the things apart, all you'd find is circuits for an MP3 player, a very primitive 'voice recognition' unit, and injection molded plastic. But you don't want to take Bark apart, do you? I mean, look at those cute little eyes!))
Tired of the gloom and doom? Stressed out by the sudden 'ripped away from home' situation? Wondering what tomorrow will bring? Wanting something a little bit cute and cuddly, but you're afraid you won't be able to give it walkies while the City is being attacked?
Well, fret no longer. I introduce to you Bark!
Bark is the perfect home companion. He recognizes several commands, and responds to the sound of your voice. He'll even watch for intruders if you set him at the door. With 7 gigs of memory standard in each unit, you can even use him to store your media files, like video and music. He's the cutest damn iPod you'll ever own.
Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "Arnie, that must cost a fortune! My vigilantism doesn't bring in enough to afford this sort of toy."
So, if you purchase right now through our special BuyChum account [linked here], you'll receive a special discounted rate. Only $29.95, no shipping and handling charges or taxes apply.
Operators are standing by.
((OKAY! Remember the robo doggies from this post? Well, they've been perfected, they do everything as advertised, and certain people (Hodge) think that they're mutant trackers. In reality, they do no such thing, so if you took the things apart, all you'd find is circuits for an MP3 player, a very primitive 'voice recognition' unit, and injection molded plastic. But you don't want to take Bark apart, do you? I mean, look at those cute little eyes!))