Thirteenth Scuttle - Video
[Oh look! It's that hideous crab monster! He's still here? Yes, yes he is. And he looks right angry, he does! He glares into the camera, looking rather intimidating.]
Attention friends and acquaintances! It is I, Doctor Zoidberg, come to the Network with a very important message for you all! Like you, I'm tired of all the naughty behavior and the yelling and the hurting! Day after day, the Network is filled with nothing but sadness and pain! It's time to put an end to this, I say! It's time for the worst offenders among us to feel the shame that they thoroughly deserve!
[And with that he pulls out a sheet of paper and begins to read aloud.]
I start with number nine on my naughty list: Eridan. Always with the misbehavior! And no one can understand him when he talks! Also his cape doesn't fit him properly and everyone thinks it looks terrible! If he wants to be taken seriously, you'd think he'd wear clothing that accentuates his body type instead of dressing like some sort of ghoul.
Gamzee is equally naughty! He tried to kill my dog! Who does that, even? Then of course there's the mayhem and the attempted murder! It's like a sad cry for attention! Newsflash, Gamzee: you've got our attention, but in the wrong way.
Illidan needs to stop pushing people away! It's like he want us to hate and fear him! I think he is overcompensating for something; him probably had a very unhappy childhood! His parents are probably very ashamed of him. But that's no reason to be a jerk and take it out on the rest of us!
Shego, Shego, Shego. What to say about her that others aren't already loudly thinking? Perhaps if she brushed her hair and took a bath every now and then, people might not be frightened off by her. Also she should be nicer to people if she ever wants to make friends.
James Bond! Bah! Cowboys and Aliens was bad and you should feel bad! You're a terrible actor! Boo! Boo, I say!
On to Quicksilver: I don't know him personally, but his sweaters are hideously ugly. Also, he yells too much and probably needs therapy and should lay off the Rogaine and peroxide.
Onyx has a very nasty look about her! I suspect she's planning to eat us all as we sleep! She's very unsettling to speak to, and she has a tendency to violate people's personal space!
Reilly Tyne is sassy and mean! He's can say hurtful things, and he doesn't apologize promptly! It's alarming that one young person can be so mean spirited towards his elders! Insulting Mr. Osborn like that?! For shame, Reilly! For shame!
And last but not least of all: The Joker is not actually a friendly clown, but is in fact a very bad murderer!
[And with that declaration, he throws his paper to the floor and crosses his claws in a huff!]
Be warned, my fellow Cityzens! This land is populated with nogoodniks and rapscallions! The rowbutt woman has tasked us with protecting this City, and we must set an example to the rest of the populace! No more shall we tolerate the sullying of the good imPort name! Join me, friends! Let us shame the miscreants among us into doing what is right and proper!
Now, can I get a huzzah?!
Attention friends and acquaintances! It is I, Doctor Zoidberg, come to the Network with a very important message for you all! Like you, I'm tired of all the naughty behavior and the yelling and the hurting! Day after day, the Network is filled with nothing but sadness and pain! It's time to put an end to this, I say! It's time for the worst offenders among us to feel the shame that they thoroughly deserve!
[And with that he pulls out a sheet of paper and begins to read aloud.]
I start with number nine on my naughty list: Eridan. Always with the misbehavior! And no one can understand him when he talks! Also his cape doesn't fit him properly and everyone thinks it looks terrible! If he wants to be taken seriously, you'd think he'd wear clothing that accentuates his body type instead of dressing like some sort of ghoul.
Gamzee is equally naughty! He tried to kill my dog! Who does that, even? Then of course there's the mayhem and the attempted murder! It's like a sad cry for attention! Newsflash, Gamzee: you've got our attention, but in the wrong way.
Illidan needs to stop pushing people away! It's like he want us to hate and fear him! I think he is overcompensating for something; him probably had a very unhappy childhood! His parents are probably very ashamed of him. But that's no reason to be a jerk and take it out on the rest of us!
Shego, Shego, Shego. What to say about her that others aren't already loudly thinking? Perhaps if she brushed her hair and took a bath every now and then, people might not be frightened off by her. Also she should be nicer to people if she ever wants to make friends.
James Bond! Bah! Cowboys and Aliens was bad and you should feel bad! You're a terrible actor! Boo! Boo, I say!
On to Quicksilver: I don't know him personally, but his sweaters are hideously ugly. Also, he yells too much and probably needs therapy and should lay off the Rogaine and peroxide.
Onyx has a very nasty look about her! I suspect she's planning to eat us all as we sleep! She's very unsettling to speak to, and she has a tendency to violate people's personal space!
Reilly Tyne is sassy and mean! He's can say hurtful things, and he doesn't apologize promptly! It's alarming that one young person can be so mean spirited towards his elders! Insulting Mr. Osborn like that?! For shame, Reilly! For shame!
And last but not least of all: The Joker is not actually a friendly clown, but is in fact a very bad murderer!
[And with that declaration, he throws his paper to the floor and crosses his claws in a huff!]
Be warned, my fellow Cityzens! This land is populated with nogoodniks and rapscallions! The rowbutt woman has tasked us with protecting this City, and we must set an example to the rest of the populace! No more shall we tolerate the sullying of the good imPort name! Join me, friends! Let us shame the miscreants among us into doing what is right and proper!
Now, can I get a huzzah?!