9. Sugar Plum Fairies just everywhere up ins

[pas_de_ducks]

[Hi, City. Have some video of Duck wearing a very silly reindeer-antler headband, and looking more awkward than usual. If at all possible.]

I, uh... I know this sounds like a silly question, but I come from a really... really long way away from here, and I don't know, so.

[deep breath]

...who's Santa Claus?

[And as soon as it's out of her mouth

Comments

video | I am so sorry

[insourarmor]

Santa Claus is what they call Saint Nicholas here. He gives gifts to well-behaved children at Christmastime.

[[His tone and expression grow more serious.]]

Krampus is what you should be more concerned about, though.

video | no you're not

[pas_de_ducks]

...Krampus?

Fakir will be

[insourarmor]

[[He nods. Was that a smile for just a second? Nah.]]

Krampus handles the misbehaving children.

Especially when Dad gives him That Look

[pas_de_ducks]

What do you mean, handles? Does he give away coal? I heard Santa Claus does that sometimes.

Nah, if she flips out enough he'll feel bad on his own

[insourarmor]

No, he doesn't give you anything. He follows Saint Nicholas around, and when they stop at a bad child's house, Krampus takes out a switch and whips them for misbehaving. [[He leans closer to the comm, tucking his chin down a little to give an impression of a cheap Kubrick angle]] If they've been bad enough that year, he'll wrap them up in chains, chuck them into a basket on his back, and carry them to Hell.

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[pas_de_ducks]

[pas_de_ducks]

Y... you're making that up.

[insourarmor]

[[He pulls back from the comm and crosses his arms.]] I didn't make any of that up.

[[This is true. From a certain point of view.]]

And I doubt you'd see him anyway; you're not bad, just spastic. But if you see a big, tall man covered in hair like a goat, with big long horns and a basket on his back, hope he passes you by.

[pas_de_ducks]

[[a few seconds of verbal keysmashing, and then--]]

QUACK!

[[aaaand she's hiding under the sofa in a flurry of feathers. GOOD JOB FAKIR]]

action

[insourarmor]

[[Once he's done snickering, he pads ever so quietly and reaches under the sofa.]]

[[With a hand that's kinked up all claw-like.]]

[[He kids because he loves.]]

action

[pas_de_ducks]

[[at first, just ducky shrieking.]]

[[And then YOU GET BIT, FAKIR.]]

[insourarmor]

[[Being bitten by a duckling isn't painful, but it is startling, so he reels his hand back and lets out a half-contained laugh]] You're vicious for something without teeth!

[pas_de_ducks]

Quaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

[[And with that, she practically cannons out from under the couch and into Mytho, trying either to scramble up his leg or hide behind his ankles or both.]]

[insourarmor]

[[Fakir, meanwhile, is trying to look innocent.]] I think I spooked her trying to get her out from under the sofa.