CNM evening news, live broadcast;
[A jovial-looking male reporter is sitting at his desk. To the right of his head is a picture with the Mayor's face superimposed in front of a building; in the bottom left corner, a piranha is sort of melting into the building. Laid out over the whole ensemble, there's a big, semi-transparent red question-mark. The photoshop job is godawful.]
And now it's time to get to the question of the hour: what on earth happened to the Mayor last night? We go live to Amy Campbell, to tell us more about the situation. Amy?
[Cut to an overhead view of the same building from the terrible photoshop, then to a slight woman in a raincoat standing in front of that same building; you can clearly see the revolving-door lobby of a ritzy hotel.]
Thank you, Jim. I'm coming to you from outside Millar Suites--no relation--where rumors are flying about the mysterious circumstances under which Mayor Michael Miller was rushed to Bellevue late on Sunday evening. What multiple hotel workers and an unnamed paramedic are claiming, however, is that the Mayor was not alone in his hotel room that night. Instead, the story goes, he was there having a romantic liaison--with infamous local radio pundit, Snap Daniel.
None of these rumors are confirmed, but the allegations come as a particular surprise considering the statements Daniel has made about homosexuality in the past, some of which have sparked outrage in the gay community. Here are some of the latest controversial remarks, made on his radio show just after the City's Pride Week.
[The video cuts to a still picture of Snap Daniel looking ridiculously smug with his chin in his hands, as a tape of his radio show plays in the background.]
And if you're living in the City and not under a rock, I'll bet you noticed that among the other... participants in the day's festivities, ahem, there were some real freaks. Guess who was out on the streets, mixing it up with the rest of them? That's right. IMPORTS.
[a pause as one soundbite ends and the next begins.]
Now I am NO HOMOPHOBE, ladies and gentlemen, but really? Really? Am I the only one seeing the pattern here? Is everyone else asleep? WAKE UP, America, because what nobody wants you to know is coming out--the gay agenda and the Import agenda are ONE AND THE SAME.
[Back to Amy Campbell!]
Ironically, this scandal comes out just as Daniel begins promotion for his upcoming talkshow, Wake Up America, and a few short months after Miller's Silver Anniversary. Both Daniel and the Mayor's representatives have refused to speak to us, and rumors of a piranha causing the Mayor's injuries have not been corroborated at this time. Reporting live from the Millar, this is Amy Campbell. Now back to you, Jim.
And now it's time to get to the question of the hour: what on earth happened to the Mayor last night? We go live to Amy Campbell, to tell us more about the situation. Amy?
[Cut to an overhead view of the same building from the terrible photoshop, then to a slight woman in a raincoat standing in front of that same building; you can clearly see the revolving-door lobby of a ritzy hotel.]
Thank you, Jim. I'm coming to you from outside Millar Suites--no relation--where rumors are flying about the mysterious circumstances under which Mayor Michael Miller was rushed to Bellevue late on Sunday evening. What multiple hotel workers and an unnamed paramedic are claiming, however, is that the Mayor was not alone in his hotel room that night. Instead, the story goes, he was there having a romantic liaison--with infamous local radio pundit, Snap Daniel.
None of these rumors are confirmed, but the allegations come as a particular surprise considering the statements Daniel has made about homosexuality in the past, some of which have sparked outrage in the gay community. Here are some of the latest controversial remarks, made on his radio show just after the City's Pride Week.
[The video cuts to a still picture of Snap Daniel looking ridiculously smug with his chin in his hands, as a tape of his radio show plays in the background.]
And if you're living in the City and not under a rock, I'll bet you noticed that among the other... participants in the day's festivities, ahem, there were some real freaks. Guess who was out on the streets, mixing it up with the rest of them? That's right. IMPORTS.
[a pause as one soundbite ends and the next begins.]
Now I am NO HOMOPHOBE, ladies and gentlemen, but really? Really? Am I the only one seeing the pattern here? Is everyone else asleep? WAKE UP, America, because what nobody wants you to know is coming out--the gay agenda and the Import agenda are ONE AND THE SAME.
[Back to Amy Campbell!]
Ironically, this scandal comes out just as Daniel begins promotion for his upcoming talkshow, Wake Up America, and a few short months after Miller's Silver Anniversary. Both Daniel and the Mayor's representatives have refused to speak to us, and rumors of a piranha causing the Mayor's injuries have not been corroborated at this time. Reporting live from the Millar, this is Amy Campbell. Now back to you, Jim.