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la_belette in capeandcowl

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May 14, 2010 11:25

So guess what, mah homiez ( Read more... )

† jack hammer | weasel

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voice inthirds May 14 2010, 19:10:08 UTC

You make them, you sell them...Do you show a buyer how to use them, then?

voice la_belette May 14 2010, 19:11:01 UTC

Within reason. If you've never held a gun in your life and you look down the barrel, I ain't stickin' around to watch the splatter.

voice inthirds May 14 2010, 19:13:09 UTC

Not an issue. The technology here is much more sophisticated than what I've been brought from; I'm not hedging bets on just assuming that if it looks the same it works the same.

voice la_belette May 14 2010, 19:18:40 UTC

Just so long as you remember there's a right end and a wrong end and you stay behind the first and away from the second, you'll be fine.

voice inthirds May 14 2010, 19:21:47 UTC

And all the blanks fill themselves in, then. That's fine. Th--

[beat. ...wait. crap.]

...You don't take pay in gold, do you.

voice la_belette May 14 2010, 19:23:53 UTC

What, are you shitting me? I fuckin' love gold. Gold is spectacular. Gold is to the gun runner what a Chevy Astro van is to soccer moms. 18 or 24k?

voice inthirds May 14 2010, 19:26:14 UTC

[beat. the hale is a chev--]

You can see for yourself if you convince me to actually bring it and trade up for one of your guns.

voice la_belette May 14 2010, 19:29:50 UTC

Lemme put it like this: the last time this shit happened and the Major took all his Nazi pricks out that direction for a war?

Practically everybody who went along with him were holding my guns.

And I didn't get a single complaint.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a group of fuckin' spandex jockeys from complaining at all times? It's hard, boyo. And yet nobody said word fuckin' one to me about the level of my tech.

It's so good that I have a 100% seller rating on eBay.

It's so good that Chuck Norris writes clever internet memes about my guns.

It's so good that if Baby Jesus ever needed an AK-47, Baby Jesus would be toting one of my AK-47s.

voice inthirds May 14 2010, 19:34:13 UTC

...You have a talent for saying a lot without saying much at all.

voice la_belette May 14 2010, 19:37:53 UTC

I'm also double-jointed.

voice inthirds May 14 2010, 19:40:21 UTC

[SIGH.] Look, just...Tell me where I'd have to go to have a look at these guns for sale. If they're as wonderful as you say, they ought to speak for themselves.

[encrypted] la_belette May 14 2010, 19:41:47 UTC

[Room number] at the MAC. Used to be a lot more sneaky about it, but I figure anybody wanting to rip me off is going to get Mr. Smiley inserted up an orifice.

...Mr. Smiley is a gun.

[encrypted] 1/3 inthirds May 14 2010, 19:44:33 UTC

Noted. T--

inthirds May 14 2010, 19:45:11 UTC

[beat.] Wait a second. This number is...

inthirds May 14 2010, 19:45:55 UTC

[longer beat. oh hale.]

...Are you the one that makes all that noise in the middle of the night upstairs?

[DIES LOLIN'] la_belette May 14 2010, 19:47:10 UTC

Hey, man, Guitar Hero doesn't play itself.

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