[Voice]

[daaaaaaahling]

I have a very serious question to ask all of you, dahlings. I could ask each individually, but it comes up so often I thought I would take care of it all at once.

Are you all sitting down?

Ready for a nice chat?

Good.

Okay, serious question now, dahlings:

What do you all have against spandex?

Every time I offer one of you supers a suit the only concern

Comments

[Video]

[namesnotzippy]

[Have a young man with bright (practically glowing, ohoho) blue eyes, blue hair, and a blue jacket tilting his head curiously at the camera.]

What is spandex? It's not a substance I am familiar with though I have heard it mentioned on the comm a few times and unfortunately I haven't had a moment to go look it up.

[Video]

[daaaaaaahling]

It's a cloth. Very stretchy so it completely conforms to your shape while allowing movement.

Of course that's not all that I use, but it's usually in the blend.

[Video]

[namesnotzippy]

That sounds very useful, actually. How does it hold up to intense friction? I keep ruining my pants and it's very frustrating to have to buy more of them all the time.

Re: [Video]

[daaaaaaahling]

Dahling...Have you forgotten that you already asked me this?

Yes, it will keep up with your intense speed.

[Voice] ICON OOCLY RELATED DESIGN THIS MAN A COSTUME PLZ

[spacetimeprime]

Is spandex a sort of armor?

[Voice] As long as he's a hero he's almost gauranteed one

[daaaaaaahling]

Not until after I get my hands on it.

[Voice] ...close enough. :D

[spacetimeprime]

...would you care to explain?

[Voice]

[daaaaaaahling]

Of course, dahling.

I make super suits. You can't make that out of fabric you get from the store...I have to modify and weave my own materials.

It's better with an example. Who are you? what do you do?

[grenadeball]

superman's package

dangling in everyone's face

forever

choo choo, here is my dong, please try to ignore it pressing against your thigh while i'm flying you at 10 thousand miles per hour away from a horrible plane crash

alternatively:

hey, it's wonder woman

and it's her camel toe

neat

[daaaaaaahling]

Two words, dahling:

Dance. Belt.

[grenadeball]

more words:

dance belts just turn one problem into another problem

the problem being 'a fucking dance belt are you kidding me'

[daaaaaaahling]

Every outfit has the proper underclothes to go with it.

What do you have against dance belts...it's not like you would need one.

[voice]

[bet_on_bolton]

Uh.

What Tank said.

Packages and camel toe.

[voice]

[daaaaaaahling]

Dahling...with all of your time singing and being on stage, I know you have heard of a dance belt.

Proper undergarments are all that you need.

[voice]

[bet_on_bolton]

Aye dee kay. Man. I got no clue what a dance belt is.

[voice]

[daaaaaaahling]

Wait...you're playing Frankenfurter and you don't know what a dance belt is?

You're going to be popular, dahling.

[shockheadedpete]

If you an' your powers ain't designed for speed, why should your uniform gotta be?

It's like havin' cape if you don't fly: totally stupid.

[daaaaaaahling]

Capes are stupid no matter what your power! Especially if you fly!

Is looking 'good' which is up for debate because capes don't even look dramatic if everyone and their uncle is wearing one more important than staying alive?

Have you ever seen a newsreport after a super died from their cape? Bits everywhere, dahling. Everywhere!

No capes. Your argument is moot.

[shockheadedpete]

The heck are you talkin' about? I never seen anybody get killed by their own cape. What, was it a evil cape?

[daaaaaaahling]

Thunderhead! 1958! Cape snagged on a missile fin.

Justice Guy! 1975! Caught on a flagpole at 100 mph!

Gazebo boy! 1960! Sucked into a giant mechanical clock!

No capes!