02 - Back in the Race

[cantwhinnyemall]

I have consulted your Earth calendar and it seems that I have no memory of the past few decisweeps. I require information on several matters and am in possession of sufficient pattern recognition to recognize that a straight answer for most of them is unlikely to be forthcoming

Comments

[miraculls]

Hahaha, that Equius dogg what all up I be hearing? Catsis be motherfuckin' chill as an ice-cold, bro, she'll be real glad to see you again and shit.

[cantwhinnyemall]

Highblood.

...I cannot help but notice that you appear to be in a less regal state of mind than I last recall.

[Either more time shenanigans are afoot or he's undergone some sort of miraculous relapse.]

[miraculls]

Uh...sorry, dogg, I ain't got a motherfuckin' clue what you be on about. You asking me to roleplay shit with you again?

[cantwhinnyemall]

Thank you but I believe that I have been sufficiently put in my place for now.

I may. Require disciple at a later date.

[miraculls]

Hahaha, you think? Well, good luck getting it all up over, bro, I don't know if they sell motherfuckin' discipline in the stores here.

[cantwhinnyemall]

[Oh Gamzee how far you have fallen from your noble heritage. He... really misses the throttling right about now.]

If I might be so bold as to ask, what was the last major event you remember from our home universe?

[miraculls]

[would he miss it as much if he knew what Gamzee did to Nepeta right afterwards...]

Uhh...I think I just got done building a really bitchtits hornpile. And best friend all up and ordered us not to get our dreams on.

[cantwhinnyemall]

["Ignorance is bliss" sums up about 40% of Homestuck.]

In retrospect perhaps we all should have paid more heed to his unpleasantly loud advice at that point.

Have you found a local source of your reprehensible toxins?

[He's not exactly sure what drove the Highblood sane but he's got a handful of theories.]

[miraculls]

Naaaaaw, dogg, they ain't done got no sopor slime or Faygo here. Real motherfuckin' sad, I know. Shit be cool, though, the starmonkeys got their own wicked elixers and pies that I can what all be slamming back, honk!

[cantwhinnyemall]

Dare I inquire into the matter of what in the world you mean by starmonkey.

[miraculls]

You know, all those motherfuckin' pink starmonkeys what keep walking around this miracle land and shit. I all up and turned into one too, haha. Kind of a weird motherfuckin' miracle, but shit, if that be what the mirthful messiahs rained down, then I ain't gonna argue.

[cantwhinnyemall]

Ah. Yes. Those starmonkeys.

You are not distressed by the excision of all proof of your aristocratic heritage.

[miraculls]

Uhhh, you talking about my horns, bro? Hahaha, yeah, I kinda miss them and shit, but at least I don't be gotta worrying about jamming them into any motherfuckin' ceilings or tables no more. And this pink skin be real pretty as a motherfuckin' carnival, haha.

[cantwhinnyemall]

And I suppose I should not expect you to be anything other than similarly cavalier about the reduction of your magnificent blood.

[miraculls]

Uhhh, what?

[HE HASN'T FIGURED OUT THAT HIS BLOOD IS RED YET OKAY...]

[cantwhinnyemall]

[Then again this is a famously touchy line of investigation.]

...Perhaps I should shy away from further inquiry into this topic.