This entire day? So not what I was expecting...

Jan 14, 2006 20:59

Remember when I thought my middle name should be 'hopeless and pathetic dreamer'? Clearly I wasn't wrong ( Read more... )

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renewedsoul_v January 15 2006, 12:18:49 UTC
"Okay, so we raid the vending machines, eat, then try not to die from hair dye fumes?" I asked, teasing, if only a little bit, as I looked up to him as he came back out of the bathroom.

"I know this place is pretty crappy, but we should probably save as much money as possible for when we're actually in Virgina Beach, right?" I reminded him. Gas, food and 30 to 40 dollars a night in motel rooms was going to add up really quickly, and then there'd be rent, furniture, a million things to worry about. Logan wasn't used to living on a fixed budget and if we spent the way he was used to, five-star hotels and the whole bit, we'd have no money left in a month.

I stood up and crossed the small distance between us before pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. It was quick, simple, fairly chaste, but full of love. "I've been wanting to do that since I got your voice mail this morning." I told him quietly.

I knew logically that I would be exhausted, dead tired and wanting to do nothing but sleep. I hadn't stopped moving, doing something, since the moment I got up this morning. But I wasn't. Or maybe I was just more, I don't know, relieved to have Logan with me right now, that we were okay, but knew we had a lot to do before I'd feel comfortable with the idea of sleeping.

"So, should we go load up on insane amounts of junk food?" I asked with a smile.

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logan_echolls January 15 2006, 12:35:07 UTC
"Veronica..." I started, and I was about to protest money wise cause there were thousands there when I realized that she was right about saving money. We didn't know how long we'd be gone and knowing how deeply stupid the head of Balboa County sheriff's department was, it could be months, couldn't it.

She crosses the distance between us and presses her lips softly against mine and after this day it seems like the best thing in the world. To know that she's actually still there is better than anything right now, because I need her more than ever.

I just try to start to start again even if she's joking about this morning now. "Veronica..." I look up for a moment and let a breath out, "Veronica, this morning. About this morning, I'm really sorry. Okay? I was trying to push you away and... I just hate that I hurt you. That wasn't what I wanted to do."

Her offer of junk food and dye fumes was almost starting to sound appealing. I just wanted this over with. I hate that you're out here because of me, are the words that I'm missing in that whole statement.

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renewedsoul_v January 15 2006, 12:54:14 UTC
"I know you are, Logan." I nodded to him. "It's okay. I promise. I get it. Why you were. But I'm still here, so it doesn't matter anymore, okay?" I asked. "It's over and we're okay. It's completely forgotten." I insisted gently.

I let out a soft breath, smiling to him for a moment. I knew he didn't want to hurt me. He didn't really even have to say that. He was scared. For both of us, and somehow he decided I'd be better off without him. He just forgot I'm unbelievably stubborn when I want to be.

"I know you don't exactly like the idea of scrimping so much right now, but look at it this way...the more we save getting there, the more money we'll have to buy nice things for our place. It'll balance." I said. I knew Logan well enough to know he could deal with a few crappy motel rooms in exchange for a comfy couch, nice TV and a PS2. After all, it was important that we at least felt comfortable in the place that was going to be our home for the foreseeable future, right?

Either way, we had more than enough money to last us for a while. Not so much that we didn't have to keep track of it, but enough that we could live comfortably, more so than I was even used to at this point, for months on end.

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logan_echolls January 15 2006, 13:08:34 UTC
"Thanks," I told her softly when she sighed in relief. I'm not sure I was quite feeling relief yet, but I knew it was better that she was here with me and that was mostly what mattered right now. I dipped my head to kiss her softly like I wanted to do all the times she'd been upset this afternoon but I had been too stubborn or scared to do so.

I ran my fingers through her hair, shutting my eyes for a moment. It was the same thing. I had to keep reminding myself that this wasn't a dream and that she was really here with me. This wasn't any illusion, she was really here.

"You know, I really don't care about money right now. I pretty much care that you're here with me." I told her. Sure tomorrow I'd think money would be nice when we both had a backache from a bed that was probably too hard, but overall the only thing that mattered was her presence.

"But for now, money sort of buys food and I don't think amidst the insanity I've eaten all day." I laughed softly to myself. She probably hadn't either. We probably had driven as far as we could get without passing out and with time to sleep. I didn't feel particularly hungry and I'm not sure she was either but eating something was better than nothing - even if it was going to be chocolate, chips and soda.

I leaned my forehead against hers for a moment - a thankful statement before I kissed her hairline.

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renewedsoul_v January 15 2006, 21:22:52 UTC
I returned the kiss softly, a smile forming on my lips, my eyes remaining closed as he ran his fingers though my hair gently. It felt so good just to be close to him right now. It almost made everything from this morning feel like some sort of horrible nightmare. Almost.

Nightmare or not, the important part was we were safe, and together. Together being the key point there. All of this was far too much for either of us to deal with alone. At least together we had someone else around to keep us grounded. Keep us from feeling totally alone. Not being able really be ourselves, talk to anyone from Neptune... I can deal as long as I've got Logan.

"How many times and different ways am I going to have to tell you're stuck with me before you stop being amazed by the fact that I love you and actually want to be with you?" I asked him, smiling warmly. "Maybe after you wake up with me in your arms every morning for weeks?" I was actually really looking forward to that idea. Just knowing he was right there, listening to his steady heartbeat as I fell asleep.

"What a concept, hey?" I smirked when he said money bought food. "Eating in and of itself is probably not a bad one. I know I haven't eaten all day. Haven't stopped long enough for that." I laughed slightly. "I know, I should've eaten... but I'm okay."

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