Maybe Disappointing (thoughts on life, love, friends,and other stuff)
My friends page is empty
does anyone still use this thing?
no matter I use it mainly to sort my own thoughts than for public approval (i would do that on myspace or something)
even though i did wish there was a place for me to write and the people who need to see, see it.
so thought time:
(for mental note: i really dont post all my thoughts that i would like to just for the sake of saving face and not letting the whole world know of the little 'quirks of my quarks' (aww thats the most nerdy/cute combo saying all day)
1.I remember a time not too long ago when i would get calls like every weekend from people telling me things they were doing so i could come. Nowadays i struggle getting more than 2 friends at the same place at the same time. (what happened??)
2. I have a few favorite memories and this particular one i just treasure to no end.
(with as little detail as possible) my friend (girl) and i (not girl) on occasion (ie twice back in the day) go to starbucks or keva juice get a drink (non-alcoholic) and just talk about whatever for 3 hours(ish). thats it, coffee conversation and no strings attached(and no i was NOT interested because of THAT), easily the best (social ) time of my life. (as luck may have it we virtually never talk to each other anymore){what time takes away....}
You know i could probably go on and on for hours on how great that was, but you probably dont want to hear it(so moving on)
3. (this might come across as bragging but honestly its not really)For some inexplicable reason i get lots of guys telling me their problems. yeah i may have a bit of a psychiatric reputation and honestly i dont know why. I DO know that girls never talk to me about anything for any reason which is really quite sad because they are far much more interesting in conversation. (now before you read any further...yes it is cliche but heres something to think about, cliches get to be cliche because they actually happen at some point) ....you know what never mind get to know me...talk to me...actually invest some time...then maybe you can get inside the way i think about things, the days of old where honesty and honor mean something; where your word was your unbreakable contract and.....never mind (i just see these things being stripped of value and worth all the time and it gets to me) (and like i said i really dont mean for it sound braggy and i hope it doesnt come off that way)
4. ok so i drift back to 2 for a second...i might start sitting in starbucks and just wait for people i know to come by and cross fingers that they sit down and talk to me...that would be kinda cool
5. college is like a double-edged sword i like being in a school like routine with more freedom and less rules but then again this semester i have 3 classes and 4 hours of in between time where i'll just sit in the library doing whatever. and unless i find someone, that i s going to be one lonely 4 hours every monday and wednesday. i mean last semester i didnt talk to anyone that i didnt know which is kinda unsocial like but seriously, all i can remember people-wise from last semester is the guy who basically asked me if i was gay (yeah i would love to tell you the full version of that story {starbucks is seriously 10 mins away from my house}) the girl last semester that brandon asked me if i thought she was hot and after i said yes i thought how derogatory the word hot was used to describe people, and then i felt bad. and i remember the guy i sat next to in computer class...i had an unspoken rivalry with him because he was like the college teachers pet kinda and so i wanted to do better than him....(not to brag but i got 108% in that class and the highest grade in the class){it was basic computer classes people not calculus). and yeah thats pretty much it. all the people i really remember...o yeah there was this other girl i remember in calc class we came to the library at the same time on mondays and we always sat 20 ft apart every time. and i remember she had to be pushing 6'2" and she wasnt skinny at all, i remember she drove like a greenish ford ranger (the parking lot was empty every morning for our class) and i remember thinking how she seemed so nice and that i really should like attempt to talk to her, but i couldnt for the life of me figure out how to do it without looking like i was.....well you know(yeah i know what you are thinking and No)(I am one of the only guys that actually just enjoy conversations).
6. {ok i seriously fell asleep on the desk} ugh...i started staring at my userpic thing and was thinking about changing it and also replaying that part in my mind...anyway....
i think thats about it for now maybe more will come later
i really hope someone reads this and it makes a difference or something...
anyway
have a good day
and stay safe
nick~
does anyone still use this thing?
no matter I use it mainly to sort my own thoughts than for public approval (i would do that on myspace or something)
even though i did wish there was a place for me to write and the people who need to see, see it.
so thought time:
(for mental note: i really dont post all my thoughts that i would like to just for the sake of saving face and not letting the whole world know of the little 'quirks of my quarks' (aww thats the most nerdy/cute combo saying all day)
1.I remember a time not too long ago when i would get calls like every weekend from people telling me things they were doing so i could come. Nowadays i struggle getting more than 2 friends at the same place at the same time. (what happened??)
2. I have a few favorite memories and this particular one i just treasure to no end.
(with as little detail as possible) my friend (girl) and i (not girl) on occasion (ie twice back in the day) go to starbucks or keva juice get a drink (non-alcoholic) and just talk about whatever for 3 hours(ish). thats it, coffee conversation and no strings attached(and no i was NOT interested because of THAT), easily the best (social ) time of my life. (as luck may have it we virtually never talk to each other anymore){what time takes away....}
You know i could probably go on and on for hours on how great that was, but you probably dont want to hear it(so moving on)
3. (this might come across as bragging but honestly its not really)For some inexplicable reason i get lots of guys telling me their problems. yeah i may have a bit of a psychiatric reputation and honestly i dont know why. I DO know that girls never talk to me about anything for any reason which is really quite sad because they are far much more interesting in conversation. (now before you read any further...yes it is cliche but heres something to think about, cliches get to be cliche because they actually happen at some point) ....you know what never mind get to know me...talk to me...actually invest some time...then maybe you can get inside the way i think about things, the days of old where honesty and honor mean something; where your word was your unbreakable contract and.....never mind (i just see these things being stripped of value and worth all the time and it gets to me) (and like i said i really dont mean for it sound braggy and i hope it doesnt come off that way)
4. ok so i drift back to 2 for a second...i might start sitting in starbucks and just wait for people i know to come by and cross fingers that they sit down and talk to me...that would be kinda cool
5. college is like a double-edged sword i like being in a school like routine with more freedom and less rules but then again this semester i have 3 classes and 4 hours of in between time where i'll just sit in the library doing whatever. and unless i find someone, that i s going to be one lonely 4 hours every monday and wednesday. i mean last semester i didnt talk to anyone that i didnt know which is kinda unsocial like but seriously, all i can remember people-wise from last semester is the guy who basically asked me if i was gay (yeah i would love to tell you the full version of that story {starbucks is seriously 10 mins away from my house}) the girl last semester that brandon asked me if i thought she was hot and after i said yes i thought how derogatory the word hot was used to describe people, and then i felt bad. and i remember the guy i sat next to in computer class...i had an unspoken rivalry with him because he was like the college teachers pet kinda and so i wanted to do better than him....(not to brag but i got 108% in that class and the highest grade in the class){it was basic computer classes people not calculus). and yeah thats pretty much it. all the people i really remember...o yeah there was this other girl i remember in calc class we came to the library at the same time on mondays and we always sat 20 ft apart every time. and i remember she had to be pushing 6'2" and she wasnt skinny at all, i remember she drove like a greenish ford ranger (the parking lot was empty every morning for our class) and i remember thinking how she seemed so nice and that i really should like attempt to talk to her, but i couldnt for the life of me figure out how to do it without looking like i was.....well you know(yeah i know what you are thinking and No)(I am one of the only guys that actually just enjoy conversations).
6. {ok i seriously fell asleep on the desk} ugh...i started staring at my userpic thing and was thinking about changing it and also replaying that part in my mind...anyway....
i think thats about it for now maybe more will come later
i really hope someone reads this and it makes a difference or something...
anyway
have a good day
and stay safe
nick~