(no subject)
It's a horrible feeling when you realize that for just this moment in time you are exactly what they'd always say you'd be.
You know, yesterday I wasn't that person. Yesterday I was a rebel and strong spirited. I had more of my stuff together, a fresher outlook on life. My creativity made me proud, and my ambitions never once seemed impossible.
Today I am down. I've lost the ability to reach to all the corners of my life effectively. I've disapointed myself with money. I'm at a loss and have begun to think I'm secretly TRYING to make things worse for me.
Until Monday I wait on a verdict. I'll be sad until then, perhaps sadder come Monday. Perhaps I'll be over this mood and with good news might be able to genuinly smile again. Nothing is sadder than a fake smile. Not even a real tear.
You know, yesterday I wasn't that person. Yesterday I was a rebel and strong spirited. I had more of my stuff together, a fresher outlook on life. My creativity made me proud, and my ambitions never once seemed impossible.
Today I am down. I've lost the ability to reach to all the corners of my life effectively. I've disapointed myself with money. I'm at a loss and have begun to think I'm secretly TRYING to make things worse for me.
Until Monday I wait on a verdict. I'll be sad until then, perhaps sadder come Monday. Perhaps I'll be over this mood and with good news might be able to genuinly smile again. Nothing is sadder than a fake smile. Not even a real tear.