[thelyricalmuses] # 24 - Save Yourself
Title: All a Game
Song: "Save Yourself" by Stabbing Westward
Character: Jack Shephard
Rating: PG - 13 language
Pairing(s): No pairing written but there are Kate references
Fandom(s): LOST
Author's Note: 3x06.
So you're searching for an angel
Someone who can make you whole
He stands in the operating room clutching the walkie talkie like a life line. He thinks that maybe it is. Maybe it’s the only thing that is keeping him alive right now, that and the dying man on the table. He could start thinking of ethics at a time like this, all the things he was taught in Med School. Do No Harm keeps echoing in his head a lot like it did when he was setting up to remove Boone’s leg but he assures himself that this is different. It’s necessary. It’s the only fucking thing he can do right now; the only thing he could do for them. God knew what they would have done to convince him to do this surgery.
They’d identified his weakness pretty early in, at least it seemed as much to him when Ben made mention of what Kate had done as though it was a betrayel of some kind. As though she owed him anything.
Jack hated being manipulated, they took that opportunity and you know what? So had he. He took it and ran as fast as he could - metaphorically of course. He wasn’t sure if he could let Ben die at the end of the day. He was pretty sure he couldn’t and the thought made him feel weak. He thinks that’s probably his father’s influence on him to feel weak when a man’s life is in his hands and he knows he’s unable to let him die. He just hopes they don’t know that.
They probably do. It’s all a game to them, even this life on the table in front of him. It’s a fucking game to these people. Let him die, let him live. Save his life. Get off the island. Save Kate and Sawyer. He’s not sure any of it means anything anymore but he does what he can.
The walkie crackles in his hand and he stops pacing. Stops breathing as he waits for something, anything.
I can not save you
I can't even save myself
“Jack …” Her voice echos in the small room barely audible over the soft beeping of the machine Ben’s hooked up to. All he can hear is defeat.
He knows its all for nothing but he always has to try.
Word Count: 371
Song: "Save Yourself" by Stabbing Westward
Character: Jack Shephard
Rating: PG - 13 language
Pairing(s): No pairing written but there are Kate references
Fandom(s): LOST
Author's Note: 3x06.
So you're searching for an angel
Someone who can make you whole
He stands in the operating room clutching the walkie talkie like a life line. He thinks that maybe it is. Maybe it’s the only thing that is keeping him alive right now, that and the dying man on the table. He could start thinking of ethics at a time like this, all the things he was taught in Med School. Do No Harm keeps echoing in his head a lot like it did when he was setting up to remove Boone’s leg but he assures himself that this is different. It’s necessary. It’s the only fucking thing he can do right now; the only thing he could do for them. God knew what they would have done to convince him to do this surgery.
They’d identified his weakness pretty early in, at least it seemed as much to him when Ben made mention of what Kate had done as though it was a betrayel of some kind. As though she owed him anything.
Jack hated being manipulated, they took that opportunity and you know what? So had he. He took it and ran as fast as he could - metaphorically of course. He wasn’t sure if he could let Ben die at the end of the day. He was pretty sure he couldn’t and the thought made him feel weak. He thinks that’s probably his father’s influence on him to feel weak when a man’s life is in his hands and he knows he’s unable to let him die. He just hopes they don’t know that.
They probably do. It’s all a game to them, even this life on the table in front of him. It’s a fucking game to these people. Let him die, let him live. Save his life. Get off the island. Save Kate and Sawyer. He’s not sure any of it means anything anymore but he does what he can.
The walkie crackles in his hand and he stops pacing. Stops breathing as he waits for something, anything.
I can not save you
I can't even save myself
“Jack …” Her voice echos in the small room barely audible over the soft beeping of the machine Ben’s hooked up to. All he can hear is defeat.
He knows its all for nothing but he always has to try.
Word Count: 371