[Hockey RPF] His Executive Assistant!
Title: His Executive Assistant!
Author:
hazel
Reader & Cover artist: fishpatrol
Fandom: Hockey RPF
Pairing: Patrick Kane/Jonathan Toews
Rating: Mature
Summary: 25, openly bisexual and even more openly disinclined to stick around for breakfast, blond, and possessed of a college education that passed through 3 Ivies before ending up at a State campus that has a new Kane-funded Economics building, Patrick Kane is an open book. Less of a mystery novel and more of a cartoon pamphlet on avoiding STDs.
Jon wishes he’d listened to his mom when she told him George Devereux from down the street had work going in his lawnmower repair business.
File Length, Size, & Type: 1:53:34, 78MB, MP3
Reader's notes: There were chunks of this podfic that I actually recorded 5-7 times -- and at one point, I had to throw out almost an hour of raw audio. /o\ So, huge thanks to the24thkey for the cheerleading and listening to me whine for weeks, and to ~~~darling applegeuse for beta-listening and for stopping me from re-recording for an eighth time by telling that of course I wasn't supposed to sound super enthusiastic in the narration -- it's Tazer's PoV after all.
The great thing about this story is that it's completely AU and you don't need any knowledge of canon to follow it! But! If you're curious as to who these dudes are, this is an excellent primer for the pairing (a fun read even if you have zero interest in the sport!). And! If you're interested in listening to some other podfics for this pairing that don't require any canon-knowledge, [click here to expand the list!]
Tour De Force written by thehoyden, read by
marianas [Length: 2hr]
Author's summary: “Write what you know” was good enough advice for Jo March, so it’s good enough for Patrick Kane.
I will admit, this is the first podfic (and fic, really) that I'd encountered in this fandom, so I may have imprinted on it -- but seriously, I've lost track of the number of times I've listened to this podfic and I've decided to just leave it on my iPod and never delete it. Awesome and engaging performance by
marianas.
Not a Heart of Gold written by
queeniegalore, read by anna_unfolding [Length: 1.5hr]
Author's summary: For the longest time this fic was unofficially titled 'Kaner's not a hooker but Tazer probably wants him to be', and I really can't think of a better way to summarize it than that. Many words of Tazer fantasizing, pining, jerking off, and paying for sex, because that's apparently how he rolls.
To be fair, only 2/3 of this fic is porn? The other 1/3 is Johnny paying Patrick to do random shit (like shutting up). EITHER WAY. anna_unfolding does a wonderful job of performing this fic -- idk, her voice is just perfect for it.
Keep You on My Arm written by
rsadelle, read by bessyboo [Length: 40min]
Author's summary: In which the gay bar is Stalberg's idea and Kaner doesn't notice Jon pretending to be his boyfriend.
This story is hilariously ridiculous and listening to bessyboo perform it is just delightful. She does voices! I dare you not to laugh while listening to this.
Is this my sneaky way of convincing more people to read/listen to/record Kane/Toews? Why, yes, yes it is.
♥
Link: Download/stream here
(in case the box.com link runs out of bandwidth for downloading --you can still stream from it!-- here is a Mediafire link)