(no subject)
I don't hate it here. I don't even dislike it here. Frederick is pretty, we live a whopping 2 minutes from downtown, and the neighbors, who admittedly are more dramatic than a bunch of high schoolers, are becoming our family.
Being here feels like we're just visiting some friends; like pretty soon we'll drive the 45 minutes to the Baltimore airport, board a plane back to Boise and be home.
We closed on our house today and the worst part about all of this is thinking about going back there and seeing the house completely changed, with new people walking around on the floors I walked on, new people who aren't even nice.
And I think about the old house in Maine, and how when we visited I was foolish enough to insist on driving down Spring Street. And how I burst into tears and never wanted to go back there again.
I made the mistake of referring to Boise as 'home' the other day. I hate watching my mom become guilty.
But I miss the foothills and Mrs. Jensen and even the stupid Y, and I miss the people I haven't really talked to since summer, and the ones I talk to a lot. I miss walking into a store and knowing where the hell things are, and I miss being able to walk around my house without spotsearching the walls for light switches.
The thing is, I miss a lot of things I knew I would miss, but I miss even more things that never mattered until I left.
Being here feels like we're just visiting some friends; like pretty soon we'll drive the 45 minutes to the Baltimore airport, board a plane back to Boise and be home.
We closed on our house today and the worst part about all of this is thinking about going back there and seeing the house completely changed, with new people walking around on the floors I walked on, new people who aren't even nice.
And I think about the old house in Maine, and how when we visited I was foolish enough to insist on driving down Spring Street. And how I burst into tears and never wanted to go back there again.
I made the mistake of referring to Boise as 'home' the other day. I hate watching my mom become guilty.
But I miss the foothills and Mrs. Jensen and even the stupid Y, and I miss the people I haven't really talked to since summer, and the ones I talk to a lot. I miss walking into a store and knowing where the hell things are, and I miss being able to walk around my house without spotsearching the walls for light switches.
The thing is, I miss a lot of things I knew I would miss, but I miss even more things that never mattered until I left.