(no subject)
1) List 10 things you want to say to people but know you never will.
2) Don't say who they are.
3) Disable comments
4) Never discuss it again.
1) I know I would never be able to say this to you in person for fear of how awkward it would be. I just want you to know.. that your friendship means so much to me.. I really dont know where I would be if we weren't friends anymore. You're always the one I turn to first if somethings wrong.. and I can always trust you the most. Its funny that I'm comfortable talking about the stuff we talk about on msn.. and you know what stuff I mean lol.. but I couldnt even tell you this. I've known you for so long.. and I dont even think we've ever even had like a significant "arguement."..in like 11 years. I know I've done some stuff that you're not proud of.. and when you tell me it disappoints you and that our friendship isnt as strong as it was.. it hurts me. I hate myself for that. I think that if I ever lost you as a friend.. I would be lost. Which is why I hope to God that that never happens. You mean so much to me.. and I just hope you know that. I'm sorry if I've ever done anything to hurt you.. because I would be so mad at myself if I did.
2) I miss what we had.. I really do. I think about it a lot.. we shared so many good times.. and I really do miss it. Sorry I was such a jerk after. But I was just ridiculously hurt. We shared so much.. and we were so in love.. and then just.. it was gone completely. I'm sorry
3) I wish something could happen between us. Although it probably never will. I like you so much..I wish I hadnt been drunk.
4) I love you more than you know.. and I know we fight like crazy all the time over stupid and ridiculous things.. but my life would suck a lot without you. I need you right now.. more than you know, and it's not like you'll ever see this anyways.. you dont even know what livejournal is.. let alone how to get there.. dumbass.. haha. Well I look up to you a lot, and I love you.
5) You are so beautiful.. you make my soul full of life and warmth.. and even though your sitting here telling me to say this... well, I secretly think you're gay. But I love you man. You're so sweet. One of my favorite friends. You make me so ridiculously happy. Even when were sitting pigging out at swim practice. But seriously man... talking to you always cheers me up.. and I'm so glad we're friends.
6) i regret it 100%, no question about it. i wasted fucking time when i could've been somewhere else, with someone else. it was stupid of me to lie to you. I'm sorry.
7) You piss me off so much sometimes. I dont think you even realize it. I know you're not ok with some of the things I do. I know that. Buddy, you ram it into my head every chance you get. You tell me you "love" me.. but you know what.. if you did.. you wouldnt say shit to me. I realize you only say it cause you "care" about me. Like i love you.. i do.. but it upsets me when you say that stuff. Just stop it please.
8) I know we've been through a lot in the past couple years.. and it was really hard in grade 10.. but i'm glad we got through it.. and we're friends now. I miss how close we were in the end of grade 9.. I called you my best friend. And I regret what happened.. because I really do miss those times. I just hope you know that. But I'm so thankful that we made it through that, and I hope you know that.
9)hey man. we havent hung out in soooo long. i miss you so much. we made plans to have our star wars marathon for like the entire weekend. watch all the old movies and the new ones. and take breaks in between to play video games. oohh man.. i have never met a kid who is more like me. i love you sooo much. we still have to make out belt buckles. i miss going to your house and then going to the park. I MISS YOU. i miss tina too.