*Sigh* brand new!
Ok so I decided that after my top secret mission I needed to start my account fresh and more open and honest! LOL ya know? Like add people I actually know and junk LOL. Hmm... So yeah! I dunno exactly what people put in here... But I guess I will just write to myself...
Things are work have reached a nice full but not too full point. Time off, but still good income for now. I hope to catch up on bills! :) Anyways... Social circle is still shrinking but I barely notice because there is always so much going on. Don't ask me what cuz Im not really sure what I do all the time. Im usually tired and not always sure why. Could be emotional stress lol. I guess I spend more time than I should thinking about people. People like my friends and family and people like those I love. And because I waste alot of energy talking to my cat, SuperCute. *aka Athena*
Right now Im feeling a bit sad. I had a visit from the girl Im currently dating and shes great. I had a good time and all, but I cant help but feel rather blue-ish.
I kinda hoped that all the drama had ended. I thought it was gone. But then they see each other and its like it never happened. I do want them to be happy, but at the same time, I can't help but be frustrated.
When I person is giving the one thing you want to someone else, and that someone doesnt want it. Casting pearls before swine I suppose in a rough analogy.
Ever feel like you've told someone something important but they don't seem to care? You say it again to make sure that they heard you correctly and when you find that they simply don't deem it as important as you do, you feel like shaking them until they understand? They sit and wallow in a pool of self pity over the exact same thing you are feeling. Its a horrid, unsolvable jigsaw.
Meanwhile something perfectly available and nice is staring you in the face but for some reason it seems second rate.
Is it wrong to force yourself to like it, just to make yourself get over something that is unattainable? Or is it simply a means for survival? Though it seems cruel to use someone so kind in such a horrid way, if it turns out well, then they never need know and have won a devoted heart.
Such ponderings, as you can see, are quite troublesome indeed! LOL
Anyways, I have to go catch 40 winks and scuttle off to work. nites!
Things are work have reached a nice full but not too full point. Time off, but still good income for now. I hope to catch up on bills! :) Anyways... Social circle is still shrinking but I barely notice because there is always so much going on. Don't ask me what cuz Im not really sure what I do all the time. Im usually tired and not always sure why. Could be emotional stress lol. I guess I spend more time than I should thinking about people. People like my friends and family and people like those I love. And because I waste alot of energy talking to my cat, SuperCute. *aka Athena*
Right now Im feeling a bit sad. I had a visit from the girl Im currently dating and shes great. I had a good time and all, but I cant help but feel rather blue-ish.
I kinda hoped that all the drama had ended. I thought it was gone. But then they see each other and its like it never happened. I do want them to be happy, but at the same time, I can't help but be frustrated.
When I person is giving the one thing you want to someone else, and that someone doesnt want it. Casting pearls before swine I suppose in a rough analogy.
Ever feel like you've told someone something important but they don't seem to care? You say it again to make sure that they heard you correctly and when you find that they simply don't deem it as important as you do, you feel like shaking them until they understand? They sit and wallow in a pool of self pity over the exact same thing you are feeling. Its a horrid, unsolvable jigsaw.
Meanwhile something perfectly available and nice is staring you in the face but for some reason it seems second rate.
Is it wrong to force yourself to like it, just to make yourself get over something that is unattainable? Or is it simply a means for survival? Though it seems cruel to use someone so kind in such a horrid way, if it turns out well, then they never need know and have won a devoted heart.
Such ponderings, as you can see, are quite troublesome indeed! LOL
Anyways, I have to go catch 40 winks and scuttle off to work. nites!