Fresh winds
I've been neglecting my LJ for several years. It's been a difficult time, very difficult.
I never got a job. The disappointments I got reading all the rejection letters took a lot of my self-confidence and energy. Finally, I gave up.
Three years ago, I started to make plans for a firm of my own. Six months later it existed on paper, and I started making it real. I got a place and decorated it. I found the machines and materials and other things I needed. I got a loan. After another six months, everything was ready.
So, two years ago I opened the shop. I love it. The place is a dream come true. The space is perfect, my clients are wonderful people, and I enjoy my work. I've never been as happy in any job as I'm in my own little shop.
But, there's a serious problem in my business. A couple of months after the opening of the shop the global economy plummeted, and all my calculations went flying out of window, too. Nothing was as it was supposed to be. It still isn't. Uncertainty is the word that best describes my life at the moment. The shop exists today; nobody knows about the next month. I don't know how much longer I can take the stress.
A year ago, I made a decision that might help me get through the black hole that my life has become. To get something more positive to think about, I applied to doctoral studies and was lucky enough to be accepted. There were 17 applicants and only four were taken in. That ratio strengthened my failing self-confidence considerably.
For the last nine months I've been studying semiotics. There are new people in my life and fresh thoughts in my head. As a consequence, I'm feeling more positive about my future. Maybe I get through this and will be stronger than ever.
I never got a job. The disappointments I got reading all the rejection letters took a lot of my self-confidence and energy. Finally, I gave up.
Three years ago, I started to make plans for a firm of my own. Six months later it existed on paper, and I started making it real. I got a place and decorated it. I found the machines and materials and other things I needed. I got a loan. After another six months, everything was ready.
So, two years ago I opened the shop. I love it. The place is a dream come true. The space is perfect, my clients are wonderful people, and I enjoy my work. I've never been as happy in any job as I'm in my own little shop.
But, there's a serious problem in my business. A couple of months after the opening of the shop the global economy plummeted, and all my calculations went flying out of window, too. Nothing was as it was supposed to be. It still isn't. Uncertainty is the word that best describes my life at the moment. The shop exists today; nobody knows about the next month. I don't know how much longer I can take the stress.
A year ago, I made a decision that might help me get through the black hole that my life has become. To get something more positive to think about, I applied to doctoral studies and was lucky enough to be accepted. There were 17 applicants and only four were taken in. That ratio strengthened my failing self-confidence considerably.
For the last nine months I've been studying semiotics. There are new people in my life and fresh thoughts in my head. As a consequence, I'm feeling more positive about my future. Maybe I get through this and will be stronger than ever.