LET YOUR SPIRIT FLY - PART 4
Title: LET YOUR SPIRIT FLY - PART 4
Author: candy_cha0s
Pairing: Cody / Randy
POV:Cody
Summary:Not a face on all the people that I see, can thrill me like the way you do.
Disclaimer: I do not own them. Vince has that honor. This is all fiction.
Author Notes: So yea, I've been away one HELL of a long time and I am rusted to the point that the Titanic would think I was crap. But here is what I have to offer. Please read it, and PLEASE comment (harshly if you must).
Warnings: This could possibly be a bunch of garbage fic.
We got to my house and like clockwork, Randy headed straight for the kitchen. Guy could eat a fucking ton.
"Hey, does your mom have any of her home-made salsa? I love that shit," he yelled from the kitchen
"No I don't think so, I think Dad ate it all a few days ago," I yell back from the living room - he doesn’t need to know I hid a jar away for myself, I’m a good friend like that!
Our weekends mostly consisted of just lying in front of the TV with X-box controllers in hand
playing some online Halo. Randy has never been good with technology, like it literally repels him, but he is a sport about it, he knows I am a gamer freak.
"Of course he did, he beat me to it this time," He said. (You keep telling yourself that, Tiger!)
My Dad and Randy have an unusual connection. They pick fights with each other all the time. They are like two teenage girls, I swear. Recently,there has been a war over Mom's salsa, so whenever she makes it, one of the two will eat it all just so the other won't get any, unless I intervene a hide it away of course. They always have a power struggle over food.
Randy walks back in the living room with an arm full of drinks, candy and other miscellaneous junk food. The next few hours would consist of no movement, except of the thumbs, and lots of foul language that, coming from Randy, I'm sure would make the devil blush.
We finished our gaming marathon and it was well past 2 A.M. Randy was on a sugar high - which is easier for him to reach than you might think - and I was about to be down for the count. He was bouncing off the damn walls. I headed upstairs to take my shower and unwind and I think he decided he was going for a jog, or with as much energy as he had from all that candy, a marathon.
I stood in the shower just thinking to myself, how in the hell am I going to bring this up. It's not like I can casually say, “I'm gay and I want to do unspeakable things to you.” I had a lot riding on this, I needed to stop and think all of this through. I could possibly lose one of the best things about my life. I needed to stop being a cynic and figure this out.
Done with the shower, I got into bed and got all the way against the wall as Randy always prefers the outside of the bed, something about being able to escape in a fire, I'm not exactly sure, he has irrational fears some times.
I laid there just thinking to myself when he came back from his run. He came into my room and told me he was going to shower. At this point I was becoming a nervous wreck, I was literally about to have a mental break down. Randy got into bed about fifteen minutes later and I just laid there, finding myself at a
loss for words on how to work my way into this. I was about to speak when he spoke up,
"Hey Codes, I need to tell you something," he said seriously.
I was a little surprised because I was about to say the same thing to him, in case you didn’t already know that!
"Uh ok, what's up man," I ask in a concerned tone.
"Well, I kind of need your advice on something," He said.
"I really like this girl, but I don't know how to tell her."
My heart shattered. A girl .... motherfu.... All hope I had, was now extinct.
I was silent for a while, until I heard Randy calling my name.
"Man did you even hear what I said," he asked.
"Oh um yeah I heard you," I respond detachedly.
"So what do you think I should do?" he repeated.
"I don't know Randal, I'm not a relationship expert. Just tell her I guess," I said crossly. Can you blame me?
"Are you okay man, you seem irritated," he probed.
"I'm fine, just tired. I'm going to sleep now, night man," I said with no conviction.
He didn't press the matter any further. I didn't sleep at all that night. I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I had to hold myself together. I had lost. There was no way I could have a happy ending. I wasn't sure if it was that I was jealous of her, or that now I knew he was straight and wasn't secretly fantasizing about me like I had hoped.
The next morning Randy woke up and asked if I was okay, and I told him I wasn't feeling well and that I was just going to sleep in today. He looked at me curiously, then sighed and said he'd check on me later today. I felt bad for lying to him. I just didn't know what else to do. I tried to tell myself that it could be worse, it is better to have him in my life than not at all - ya know, the usual self-consoling bullshit.
I needed to suck it up and get my shit together. He is my best friend, I don't need to push him away because things didn't go my way. I just needed some time to adjust to this. I had gone for so long thinking about him and him being my world, that I realized, I don't know how else to think or how to stop.
Around 5 P.M Randy sent me a text,
Hope you're feeling better Coddles, see you in the morning for school.--
RKO
I didn't respond, I just turned my phone off, and got back into bed. A few hours later I heard my parents come in. My Mom came into my room to check on me, but I pretended to be asleep. I just wasn't in a mood for talking.
I fell asleep and was woken up by my shrill alarm, I swear when I get to college, I'm never taking an 8 A.M class.
I got up and got ready for school, I debated on staying out, but that would definitely cause Randy to come around more, and I needed to see less of him, for now. It just hurt knowing that while I'm busy putting him in every aspect of my life, I would never be in every aspect of his. It was hard to accept, I didn't want to, but I had to. I needed to be by myself as much as possible for now.
I picked up my phone to send him a quick message,
Running late-go ahead and go without me -- Cody
A few minutes later, my phone beeped indicating I had a message from Randy,
Ok man, see you at school -- RKO
I closed my phone and just sat in my room, waiting for time to pass so it will look like I'm actually running late. I tried to avoid my parents as much as possible, because my mom has an uncanny ability to sense when something is bothering me, and she always makes me feel better, but right now I just wanted to wallow in my own self-pity.
I headed out to school around 7:43 A.M giving me just enough time to walk there and arrive right as the 8 A.M. bell would ring. I went straight to orchestra class and played mechanically. I was there physically, but mentally I was in another world, one where life always unfolded the way you hoped it would... like in a Disney movie.
By lunch time, I was feeling so lethargic (big word from the morbid teenager there, folks), that all I wanted to do was go home and sleep. I didn't eat lunch, I just sat at the table waiting for everyone else to get there.
Ted was the first one to come up to the table, "You look like shit," he said peeling his orange.
"Thanks, it takes real dedication to look this good," I replied sarcastically.
"For real though man, you don't look so good. Is everything okay," he asked.
"Yeah, I'm just wallowing in my own misery, I'll be fine," I said unenthusiastically.
"Is it Randy," he asked.
I just nodded because as I was, Randy and his friends were approaching the table. They all sat down, Ted gave me a sympathetic look, and joined in on their conversation about this Friday's game against Moss-Crest High School. I just sat there thinking and waiting for the lunch period to be over. We had about five minutes left when Randy turned and asked me how I was feeling.
"I'm okay, just feeling sick," I say.
"I think I'm gonna head on upstairs to class," I said getting up.
I swear, I felt his eyes on my back as I left. I wanted to talk to him, but I just don't think I can handle talking to him about this girl that he likes just yet.
My pity party wasn't over yet. Ted came in right after the bell rung signifying that lunch was over. He sat beside me and proceeded to talk,
"What happened man," he asked
"It's nothing, Theodore, I'm just feeling bad for myself, nothing serious at all," I said hoping he would drop the issue, but he didn't.
"You danced around my question. I asked what happened," he said with some authority. When did he develop that one?!
I just sighed and responded, "I was about to tell Randy that I was gay and that he means the world to me, but he proceeded to tell me right before that he was interested in some girl and needed my advice," I said quickly.
"Ah man! I'm sorry. I know it's rough. I watched my brother go through it. I'm here to listen if you want me to," he said sympathetically.
"Thanks, but really I'll be fine. It's not a big deal," I said.
"All matters of the heart are a big deal, Cody," He said seriously.
I didn't have a chance to respond because student started to file into the classroom, so I just turned forward and put my head in my hand and braced myself for a boring lecture. After class I walked downstairs to meet Randy at our spot where we meet together and walk home.
As I was walking down the stairs, I saw them.
She was leaning against a wall, and he had his hand beside her shoulder on the wall leaning against it, that typical varsity jock romance movie pose - yea I’m a lil bitter, sue me!
She was laughing, and all the while my heart was breaking. I just took a deep breath, turned around and started walking home alone.
LET YOUR SPIRIT FLY - PART 4
Author: candy_cha0s
Pairing: Cody / Randy
POV:Cody
Summary:Not a face on all the people that I see, can thrill me like the way you do.
Disclaimer: I do not own them. Vince has that honor. This is all fiction.
Author Notes: So yea, I've been away one HELL of a long time and I am rusted to the point that the Titanic would think I was crap. But here is what I have to offer. Please read it, and PLEASE comment (harshly if you must).
Warnings: This could possibly be a bunch of garbage fic.
We got to my house and like clockwork, Randy headed straight for the kitchen. Guy could eat a fucking ton.
"Hey, does your mom have any of her home-made salsa? I love that shit," he yelled from the kitchen
"No I don't think so, I think Dad ate it all a few days ago," I yell back from the living room - he doesn’t need to know I hid a jar away for myself, I’m a good friend like that!
Our weekends mostly consisted of just lying in front of the TV with X-box controllers in hand
playing some online Halo. Randy has never been good with technology, like it literally repels him, but he is a sport about it, he knows I am a gamer freak.
"Of course he did, he beat me to it this time," He said. (You keep telling yourself that, Tiger!)
My Dad and Randy have an unusual connection. They pick fights with each other all the time. They are like two teenage girls, I swear. Recently,there has been a war over Mom's salsa, so whenever she makes it, one of the two will eat it all just so the other won't get any, unless I intervene a hide it away of course. They always have a power struggle over food.
Randy walks back in the living room with an arm full of drinks, candy and other miscellaneous junk food. The next few hours would consist of no movement, except of the thumbs, and lots of foul language that, coming from Randy, I'm sure would make the devil blush.
We finished our gaming marathon and it was well past 2 A.M. Randy was on a sugar high - which is easier for him to reach than you might think - and I was about to be down for the count. He was bouncing off the damn walls. I headed upstairs to take my shower and unwind and I think he decided he was going for a jog, or with as much energy as he had from all that candy, a marathon.
I stood in the shower just thinking to myself, how in the hell am I going to bring this up. It's not like I can casually say, “I'm gay and I want to do unspeakable things to you.” I had a lot riding on this, I needed to stop and think all of this through. I could possibly lose one of the best things about my life. I needed to stop being a cynic and figure this out.
Done with the shower, I got into bed and got all the way against the wall as Randy always prefers the outside of the bed, something about being able to escape in a fire, I'm not exactly sure, he has irrational fears some times.
I laid there just thinking to myself when he came back from his run. He came into my room and told me he was going to shower. At this point I was becoming a nervous wreck, I was literally about to have a mental break down. Randy got into bed about fifteen minutes later and I just laid there, finding myself at a
loss for words on how to work my way into this. I was about to speak when he spoke up,
"Hey Codes, I need to tell you something," he said seriously.
I was a little surprised because I was about to say the same thing to him, in case you didn’t already know that!
"Uh ok, what's up man," I ask in a concerned tone.
"Well, I kind of need your advice on something," He said.
"I really like this girl, but I don't know how to tell her."
My heart shattered. A girl .... motherfu.... All hope I had, was now extinct.
I was silent for a while, until I heard Randy calling my name.
"Man did you even hear what I said," he asked.
"Oh um yeah I heard you," I respond detachedly.
"So what do you think I should do?" he repeated.
"I don't know Randal, I'm not a relationship expert. Just tell her I guess," I said crossly. Can you blame me?
"Are you okay man, you seem irritated," he probed.
"I'm fine, just tired. I'm going to sleep now, night man," I said with no conviction.
He didn't press the matter any further. I didn't sleep at all that night. I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I had to hold myself together. I had lost. There was no way I could have a happy ending. I wasn't sure if it was that I was jealous of her, or that now I knew he was straight and wasn't secretly fantasizing about me like I had hoped.
The next morning Randy woke up and asked if I was okay, and I told him I wasn't feeling well and that I was just going to sleep in today. He looked at me curiously, then sighed and said he'd check on me later today. I felt bad for lying to him. I just didn't know what else to do. I tried to tell myself that it could be worse, it is better to have him in my life than not at all - ya know, the usual self-consoling bullshit.
I needed to suck it up and get my shit together. He is my best friend, I don't need to push him away because things didn't go my way. I just needed some time to adjust to this. I had gone for so long thinking about him and him being my world, that I realized, I don't know how else to think or how to stop.
Around 5 P.M Randy sent me a text,
Hope you're feeling better Coddles, see you in the morning for school.--
RKO
I didn't respond, I just turned my phone off, and got back into bed. A few hours later I heard my parents come in. My Mom came into my room to check on me, but I pretended to be asleep. I just wasn't in a mood for talking.
I fell asleep and was woken up by my shrill alarm, I swear when I get to college, I'm never taking an 8 A.M class.
I got up and got ready for school, I debated on staying out, but that would definitely cause Randy to come around more, and I needed to see less of him, for now. It just hurt knowing that while I'm busy putting him in every aspect of my life, I would never be in every aspect of his. It was hard to accept, I didn't want to, but I had to. I needed to be by myself as much as possible for now.
I picked up my phone to send him a quick message,
Running late-go ahead and go without me -- Cody
A few minutes later, my phone beeped indicating I had a message from Randy,
Ok man, see you at school -- RKO
I closed my phone and just sat in my room, waiting for time to pass so it will look like I'm actually running late. I tried to avoid my parents as much as possible, because my mom has an uncanny ability to sense when something is bothering me, and she always makes me feel better, but right now I just wanted to wallow in my own self-pity.
I headed out to school around 7:43 A.M giving me just enough time to walk there and arrive right as the 8 A.M. bell would ring. I went straight to orchestra class and played mechanically. I was there physically, but mentally I was in another world, one where life always unfolded the way you hoped it would... like in a Disney movie.
By lunch time, I was feeling so lethargic (big word from the morbid teenager there, folks), that all I wanted to do was go home and sleep. I didn't eat lunch, I just sat at the table waiting for everyone else to get there.
Ted was the first one to come up to the table, "You look like shit," he said peeling his orange.
"Thanks, it takes real dedication to look this good," I replied sarcastically.
"For real though man, you don't look so good. Is everything okay," he asked.
"Yeah, I'm just wallowing in my own misery, I'll be fine," I said unenthusiastically.
"Is it Randy," he asked.
I just nodded because as I was, Randy and his friends were approaching the table. They all sat down, Ted gave me a sympathetic look, and joined in on their conversation about this Friday's game against Moss-Crest High School. I just sat there thinking and waiting for the lunch period to be over. We had about five minutes left when Randy turned and asked me how I was feeling.
"I'm okay, just feeling sick," I say.
"I think I'm gonna head on upstairs to class," I said getting up.
I swear, I felt his eyes on my back as I left. I wanted to talk to him, but I just don't think I can handle talking to him about this girl that he likes just yet.
My pity party wasn't over yet. Ted came in right after the bell rung signifying that lunch was over. He sat beside me and proceeded to talk,
"What happened man," he asked
"It's nothing, Theodore, I'm just feeling bad for myself, nothing serious at all," I said hoping he would drop the issue, but he didn't.
"You danced around my question. I asked what happened," he said with some authority. When did he develop that one?!
I just sighed and responded, "I was about to tell Randy that I was gay and that he means the world to me, but he proceeded to tell me right before that he was interested in some girl and needed my advice," I said quickly.
"Ah man! I'm sorry. I know it's rough. I watched my brother go through it. I'm here to listen if you want me to," he said sympathetically.
"Thanks, but really I'll be fine. It's not a big deal," I said.
"All matters of the heart are a big deal, Cody," He said seriously.
I didn't have a chance to respond because student started to file into the classroom, so I just turned forward and put my head in my hand and braced myself for a boring lecture. After class I walked downstairs to meet Randy at our spot where we meet together and walk home.
As I was walking down the stairs, I saw them.
She was leaning against a wall, and he had his hand beside her shoulder on the wall leaning against it, that typical varsity jock romance movie pose - yea I’m a lil bitter, sue me!
She was laughing, and all the while my heart was breaking. I just took a deep breath, turned around and started walking home alone.
LET YOUR SPIRIT FLY - PART 4