since i've been reduced to a babbling fool i'll just highlight the parts that made me want to crawl into a hole and die.
*
Munson hangs up, his hands shaking, and his arms, and his legs, his whole body, chattering, unloosed, and it’s a long time before he can convince himself that Eric Chavez isn’t trying to drive him insane just so that he’ll have some company.
*
and it’s weird because it’s still not even a question, that Eric Chavez will be a star, that Munson will be left behind, again and again, not even a question.
*
“Dude, the only thing I ever had to do to get a good draft was show up and play better than you did. Which, trust me, was not some giant fucking accomplishment. When you get to the majors, you’ll see, you’ll fucking learn where you really fall. Oh, but excuse the fuck out of me. Shoulda said if you get to the majors.”
*
“I didn’t mean it,” he says desperately, and Munson’s shirt is pulled taut in his hands, Munson still straining away from him. “None of that is true, Munce, I promise it’s not. We’re the same, you know that. I know that too, swear to god I do. Please, I didn’t mean it, I’m so fucking sorry, please man.”
*
god. this made me just want to die.
i don't think i was able to read it without the recent developments in the back of my mind, and alternating between wanting to strangle chavez, and comfort him because he's so . . . i guess, lost, and my heart aching for munson, and so i really don't know what to think.
but you're right. munson seems to be on steadier footing than chavez at this point, even though chavez lords the "i'm in the majors" thing over his head as a sign of his superiority.
*
Munson hangs up, his hands shaking, and his arms, and his legs, his whole body, chattering, unloosed, and it’s a long time before he can convince himself that Eric Chavez isn’t trying to drive him insane just so that he’ll have some company.
*
and it’s weird because it’s still not even a question, that Eric Chavez will be a star, that Munson will be left behind, again and again, not even a question.
*
“Dude, the only thing I ever had to do to get a good draft was show up and play better than you did. Which, trust me, was not some giant fucking accomplishment. When you get to the majors, you’ll see, you’ll fucking learn where you really fall. Oh, but excuse the fuck out of me. Shoulda said if you get to the majors.”
*
“I didn’t mean it,” he says desperately, and Munson’s shirt is pulled taut in his hands, Munson still straining away from him. “None of that is true, Munce, I promise it’s not. We’re the same, you know that. I know that too, swear to god I do. Please, I didn’t mean it, I’m so fucking sorry, please man.”
*
god. this made me just want to die.
i don't think i was able to read it without the recent developments in the back of my mind, and alternating between wanting to strangle chavez, and comfort him because he's so . . . i guess, lost, and my heart aching for munson, and so i really don't know what to think.
but you're right. munson seems to be on steadier footing than chavez at this point, even though chavez lords the "i'm in the majors" thing over his head as a sign of his superiority.
Reply
Leave a comment