Always and Unchanging

[candescentlines]

Blur the outlines
Sand down edges
Pour plaster into the gaping holes
That keep getting wider, deeper, steeper
The inside of outsiders
Fill the cracks with cotton
Or whatever you keep in your pillow
Fill the void
Fill the void
The empty space where you should be
"So be there."
The foundation for my house of sanity
Don't let my lungs collapse on my heart

Questions and answers,
The same questions - the same answers
Replies are apologies
Or awkward avoidance.
Steady streams of uneasy silence.
Metronome answers, thick and muffled like thuds on carpet,
They're fleeting footsteps on sand.
Tongue-tips flicking on roofs,
(On loop)
Of mouths that won't open for me.
Plier teeth and pliant lips.
The feedback in sync,
Down the sink.
A chorus played in all the wrong notes;
Confessions are mistakes.
It's the distance between us.
Your eyes chasing mine,
For a moment.
"Don't catch on."
I play catch up.
Crash/collide

Masochistic addict of fractures
Opening letters and finding the same letters
On every single fucking page.
Identical envelopes.
Identical signs -
Just different postcodes.
They hate the word 'always' and the idea of.
Always and unchanging.
No or sorry
Junk mail or empty letterboxes
So leave me hanging
On the same hook

The future is bleak and with nothing else
But to wait for tomorrow to come
Again and again and again