Survey theft strikes again.
This survey was, of course, stolen from Isca.
Please keep in mind as you read this that I'm not a doom-and-gloom personality lingering like a dark cloud pouring out my soul like a bitter rain over the cold electronic ears of my keyboard. Most of these responses are tongue-in-cheek presentations of actual honesty. Some of them are deliberate attempts to decieve you. For your protection, I omitted those such entries from the final draft, which was handed in late this evening along with floorplans for an underground treehouse (more like a root-house, really) and returned with notes which were painstakingly put off to the side and ignored.
And now, without further ado:
:x: name = Daniel Jordan
:x: piercings = I am yet un-impaled.
:x: tattoos = Nah, I'm the artist, not the canvas.
:x: height = 5'11".
:x: shoe size = Elevenish.
:x: hair color = Red, blond, and light brown, all at the same time. I'm special, but not color-treated in any way.
:x: length = Shoulder-length.
:x: siblings = Older sister.
LAST...
:x: movie you rented = I don't really remember. I think it was Iron Monkey. It wasn't spectacular.
:x: movie you bought = Buffy... Season 3.
:x: song you listened to = Female of the Species. Performed by Space.
:x: song that was stuck in your head = Yellow Taxi.
:x: cd you bought = Heh, I bought my dad a Patsy Cline compilation for Father's Day.
:x: cd you listened to = My own personal mix. Yes, I own the CDs.
.:x: person you've called = Erin. I made it home safe.
:x: person that's called you = My mom.
:x: tv show you've watched = Monk. Last Friday.
:x: person you were thinking of = Wasn't really thinking much.
:x: you have a bf or gf = Yes.
:x: you have a crush on someone = Crush, no, not now, but I'm a tragic type, so I'll keep you posted.
:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = Yes.
:x: you think about suicide = Who doesn't? Do I entertain the idea of doing it? No.
:x: you believe in online dating = I've been supplied with evidence of it's existance, but I've never seen it work out first hand.
:x: others find you attractive = As a general rule, people don't usually find me at all.
:x: you want more piercings = To go with the "none" that I already have?
:x: you drink = Yes.
:x: you do drugs = No.
:x: you smoke = No. I was on fire once, but my sweatshirt was synthetic, so it just melted.
:x: you like cleaning = Not usually, but if I see a big enough mess, I get a little flustered by it, and I have to act upon it.
:x: you like roller coasters = They're a good policy, generally speaking.
:x: you write in cursive or print = Print. Cursive sounds dangerous in the mystical sense.
:x: you carry a donor card = No, for reasons that I won't bore you with.
FOR OR AGAINST...
:x: long distance relationships = For others? Fine. For me? A few months out of the year won't kill me.
:x: using someone = To what capacity? When you need a shield, you need a shield.
:x: suicide = It depends on the circumstances. You want an escape? Suicide is extremely cowardly.
:x: killing people = Biblically.
:x: teenage smoking = Their lungs, not mine. But I have been known to make personal requests that they keep their cancer to themselves.
:x: premarital sex = I've witnessed it first hand, and I like it. Disregard my poor choice of words, please.
:x: driving drunk = Anyone with so little respect for others' lives deserves centuries of torment.
:x: gay/lesbian relationships = Do what you want to do. Won't hurt me. Won't hurt anybody. This statement does not apply to any inmates out there who may be reading. What you are doing is both very physically intrusive and psychologically scarring.
:x: soap operas = Meh, they have a certain value, even if that particular value is their lack of value.
FAVORITES...
:x: food = Red meat.
:x: song = I don't consider it a "song" per se, as it isn't exactly "sung," but my favorite piece of music is Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.
:x: thing to do = Renaissance type things. It's extremely important.
:x: thing to talk about = Nothing. Everybody's familiar with that.
:x: sports = Maybe soccer. Maybe not. Hell if I know, I just live here.
:x: drinks = Cola.
:x: clothes = T-shirts and jeans. Nothing flashy.
:x: movies = Ksh. There are so many...
:x: band/singer = No favorites here either. As a general rule, I hate 99% of all bands in existance, and yet 75% of those have songs that I love.
:x: holiday = The ones that are there for just no reason at all. Like Arbor Day.
:x: cars = I'm not a car person.
HAVE YOU...
:x: ever cried over a boy = Sure, when I was about eight and my friend was moving away. That counts, I guess.
:x: ever lied to someone = I have. This page is simply rife. Or maybe it's not. I'm a huge liar. Just kidding. Maybe.
:x: ever been in a fist fight = You should have seen the other guy.
:x: ever been arrested = I haven't, no.
WHAT...
:x: shampoo do you use = Whatever's on sale. But I do insist that it's specially formulated for fine to normal hair types.
:x: cologne do you use = Nothing, usually, but I have a bottle of Gap stuff that's about three years old.
:x: shoes do you wear = Black police boots. Comfier than they look.
:x: are you scared of = I wish I could think of something... but nothing, really.
NUMBER...
:x: of times I have been in love? = I can't understand love, I can't recognise it, so I would feel very presumptuous to claim that I have been in it.
:x: of times I have had my heart broken? = A lot. At least twice... which is a lot.
:x: of hearts I have broken? = I have no idea whose heart I had... or have... that power over. None on purpose.
:x: of girls I have kissed? = One.
:x: of boys I have kissed? = None.
:x: of girls I've slept with? = One.
:x: of boys I've slept with? = None.
:x: of continents I have lived in? = One.
:x: of drugs taken illegally? = Never done any illegal drugs.
:x: of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends? = I've been fortunate to avoid situations in which such trust would be tested.
:x: of people I consider my enemies? = You're all potentials.
:x: of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? = Lots. I have lived a very extra-curricular lifestyle.
:x: of scars on my body? = Whew, you mean how much actual undamaged skin is left? Not much.
:x: of things in my past that I regret?= Count my number of living days, and divide it by one.
FAVORITE...
:x: disney movie = Depends on my mood. It's usually "The Emperor's New Groove" lately.
:x: scent = Vanilla.
:x: word = My favorite word... hmm... "quintessential," as it has so many practical applications. This sentence happens to be the quintessential use for it.
:x: nickname(s) = I've never actually had any nicknames.
:x: guy name = Simon. I've liked that name ever since I read Lord of the Flies.
:x: girl name = None stick out.
:x: eye color = Green is a neat eye color.
:x: flower = Plastic and responsibility-free.
:x: piercing = Any that takes place a safe distance from my personal space.
:x: actor = None.
:x: actress = None.
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...
:x: pretty = And witty, and wise.
:x: funny = This is a tricky question to answer. I could say something witty, but that would be arrogant. I could say something humble, but that would be cliche, which would read off as ironic, which would read off as witty, which would read off as arrogant. I can't win here. There is no possible answer. This is like the Sphinx's riddle, except that it can't be solved at all. And I wouldn't even try it, because the Sphinx's riddle was solved by Oedipus, who then went on to kill his own father and sleep with his own mother, and I'm at a point in my life (read: alive) at which I don't think that I can deal with that sort of stigma. Long story short, I have a unique way of looking at things, and some people find pleasure in ridiculing that. I hate them all. They think they're doing me a favor by laughing, but I just want to be honest and say what I feel. Oh, I'm always so quick with a reply, yes, but that's because I really do ponder the psychological ramifications of things like gravel and aluminum on a daily basis, slowly trailing off from coherence to a blurred reality. Oh, so charming. So individualistic. Go to hell. All of you.
:x: hott = Maybe not enough to warrant an extra "t," but I don't hate myself either.
:x: friendly = I'm as well-behaved as they come. So I'm told. I usually avoid "they."
:x: amusing = Don't set me off on a rant, now. I'm a bit arrogant sometimes.
:x: ugly = We all have darkness. Mine is under my eyes.
:x: loveable = I am able to be loved. I think.
:x: pessimistic = Of course not.
:x: optimistic = It's the best of all possible worlds. I mean, look at me. I'm frickin' Candide here.
:x: caring = It doesn't matter.
:x: sweet = I'm very careful about how I connect to people.
:x: dorky = You'll have to ask someone else. I don't know what's "hip" these days, so I'm not sure if I'm "it."
Please keep in mind as you read this that I'm not a doom-and-gloom personality lingering like a dark cloud pouring out my soul like a bitter rain over the cold electronic ears of my keyboard. Most of these responses are tongue-in-cheek presentations of actual honesty. Some of them are deliberate attempts to decieve you. For your protection, I omitted those such entries from the final draft, which was handed in late this evening along with floorplans for an underground treehouse (more like a root-house, really) and returned with notes which were painstakingly put off to the side and ignored.
And now, without further ado:
:x: name = Daniel Jordan
:x: piercings = I am yet un-impaled.
:x: tattoos = Nah, I'm the artist, not the canvas.
:x: height = 5'11".
:x: shoe size = Elevenish.
:x: hair color = Red, blond, and light brown, all at the same time. I'm special, but not color-treated in any way.
:x: length = Shoulder-length.
:x: siblings = Older sister.
LAST...
:x: movie you rented = I don't really remember. I think it was Iron Monkey. It wasn't spectacular.
:x: movie you bought = Buffy... Season 3.
:x: song you listened to = Female of the Species. Performed by Space.
:x: song that was stuck in your head = Yellow Taxi.
:x: cd you bought = Heh, I bought my dad a Patsy Cline compilation for Father's Day.
:x: cd you listened to = My own personal mix. Yes, I own the CDs.
.:x: person you've called = Erin. I made it home safe.
:x: person that's called you = My mom.
:x: tv show you've watched = Monk. Last Friday.
:x: person you were thinking of = Wasn't really thinking much.
:x: you have a bf or gf = Yes.
:x: you have a crush on someone = Crush, no, not now, but I'm a tragic type, so I'll keep you posted.
:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = Yes.
:x: you think about suicide = Who doesn't? Do I entertain the idea of doing it? No.
:x: you believe in online dating = I've been supplied with evidence of it's existance, but I've never seen it work out first hand.
:x: others find you attractive = As a general rule, people don't usually find me at all.
:x: you want more piercings = To go with the "none" that I already have?
:x: you drink = Yes.
:x: you do drugs = No.
:x: you smoke = No. I was on fire once, but my sweatshirt was synthetic, so it just melted.
:x: you like cleaning = Not usually, but if I see a big enough mess, I get a little flustered by it, and I have to act upon it.
:x: you like roller coasters = They're a good policy, generally speaking.
:x: you write in cursive or print = Print. Cursive sounds dangerous in the mystical sense.
:x: you carry a donor card = No, for reasons that I won't bore you with.
FOR OR AGAINST...
:x: long distance relationships = For others? Fine. For me? A few months out of the year won't kill me.
:x: using someone = To what capacity? When you need a shield, you need a shield.
:x: suicide = It depends on the circumstances. You want an escape? Suicide is extremely cowardly.
:x: killing people = Biblically.
:x: teenage smoking = Their lungs, not mine. But I have been known to make personal requests that they keep their cancer to themselves.
:x: premarital sex = I've witnessed it first hand, and I like it. Disregard my poor choice of words, please.
:x: driving drunk = Anyone with so little respect for others' lives deserves centuries of torment.
:x: gay/lesbian relationships = Do what you want to do. Won't hurt me. Won't hurt anybody. This statement does not apply to any inmates out there who may be reading. What you are doing is both very physically intrusive and psychologically scarring.
:x: soap operas = Meh, they have a certain value, even if that particular value is their lack of value.
FAVORITES...
:x: food = Red meat.
:x: song = I don't consider it a "song" per se, as it isn't exactly "sung," but my favorite piece of music is Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.
:x: thing to do = Renaissance type things. It's extremely important.
:x: thing to talk about = Nothing. Everybody's familiar with that.
:x: sports = Maybe soccer. Maybe not. Hell if I know, I just live here.
:x: drinks = Cola.
:x: clothes = T-shirts and jeans. Nothing flashy.
:x: movies = Ksh. There are so many...
:x: band/singer = No favorites here either. As a general rule, I hate 99% of all bands in existance, and yet 75% of those have songs that I love.
:x: holiday = The ones that are there for just no reason at all. Like Arbor Day.
:x: cars = I'm not a car person.
HAVE YOU...
:x: ever cried over a boy = Sure, when I was about eight and my friend was moving away. That counts, I guess.
:x: ever lied to someone = I have. This page is simply rife. Or maybe it's not. I'm a huge liar. Just kidding. Maybe.
:x: ever been in a fist fight = You should have seen the other guy.
:x: ever been arrested = I haven't, no.
WHAT...
:x: shampoo do you use = Whatever's on sale. But I do insist that it's specially formulated for fine to normal hair types.
:x: cologne do you use = Nothing, usually, but I have a bottle of Gap stuff that's about three years old.
:x: shoes do you wear = Black police boots. Comfier than they look.
:x: are you scared of = I wish I could think of something... but nothing, really.
NUMBER...
:x: of times I have been in love? = I can't understand love, I can't recognise it, so I would feel very presumptuous to claim that I have been in it.
:x: of times I have had my heart broken? = A lot. At least twice... which is a lot.
:x: of hearts I have broken? = I have no idea whose heart I had... or have... that power over. None on purpose.
:x: of girls I have kissed? = One.
:x: of boys I have kissed? = None.
:x: of girls I've slept with? = One.
:x: of boys I've slept with? = None.
:x: of continents I have lived in? = One.
:x: of drugs taken illegally? = Never done any illegal drugs.
:x: of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends? = I've been fortunate to avoid situations in which such trust would be tested.
:x: of people I consider my enemies? = You're all potentials.
:x: of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? = Lots. I have lived a very extra-curricular lifestyle.
:x: of scars on my body? = Whew, you mean how much actual undamaged skin is left? Not much.
:x: of things in my past that I regret?= Count my number of living days, and divide it by one.
FAVORITE...
:x: disney movie = Depends on my mood. It's usually "The Emperor's New Groove" lately.
:x: scent = Vanilla.
:x: word = My favorite word... hmm... "quintessential," as it has so many practical applications. This sentence happens to be the quintessential use for it.
:x: nickname(s) = I've never actually had any nicknames.
:x: guy name = Simon. I've liked that name ever since I read Lord of the Flies.
:x: girl name = None stick out.
:x: eye color = Green is a neat eye color.
:x: flower = Plastic and responsibility-free.
:x: piercing = Any that takes place a safe distance from my personal space.
:x: actor = None.
:x: actress = None.
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...
:x: pretty = And witty, and wise.
:x: funny = This is a tricky question to answer. I could say something witty, but that would be arrogant. I could say something humble, but that would be cliche, which would read off as ironic, which would read off as witty, which would read off as arrogant. I can't win here. There is no possible answer. This is like the Sphinx's riddle, except that it can't be solved at all. And I wouldn't even try it, because the Sphinx's riddle was solved by Oedipus, who then went on to kill his own father and sleep with his own mother, and I'm at a point in my life (read: alive) at which I don't think that I can deal with that sort of stigma. Long story short, I have a unique way of looking at things, and some people find pleasure in ridiculing that. I hate them all. They think they're doing me a favor by laughing, but I just want to be honest and say what I feel. Oh, I'm always so quick with a reply, yes, but that's because I really do ponder the psychological ramifications of things like gravel and aluminum on a daily basis, slowly trailing off from coherence to a blurred reality. Oh, so charming. So individualistic. Go to hell. All of you.
:x: hott = Maybe not enough to warrant an extra "t," but I don't hate myself either.
:x: friendly = I'm as well-behaved as they come. So I'm told. I usually avoid "they."
:x: amusing = Don't set me off on a rant, now. I'm a bit arrogant sometimes.
:x: ugly = We all have darkness. Mine is under my eyes.
:x: loveable = I am able to be loved. I think.
:x: pessimistic = Of course not.
:x: optimistic = It's the best of all possible worlds. I mean, look at me. I'm frickin' Candide here.
:x: caring = It doesn't matter.
:x: sweet = I'm very careful about how I connect to people.
:x: dorky = You'll have to ask someone else. I don't know what's "hip" these days, so I'm not sure if I'm "it."