Yeah, I'm still alive
Just thought I'd let you know that I'm still alive.
I'm really busy and stressed, but today I realized that it would all be okay. Somehow, it will work out. With God's help, I can handle all this. I can do 10 hours of class and 5 hours of practice every day. I can handle being dejected from the jazz band after they told me I was in. I can handle music theory and ear training. I can handle not having many friends right now, since I'm spending all my time in classes, ensembles, and with my trombone, bass, or piano.
I broke down today-I never did last semester, and I got a 3.8 last semester. It got so hard so fast this time, and I started crying like a week before the AP test. Funny, I remembered what Jared said to me that day. That everything will be okay, whether you pass or not. It was a fun experience anyways, but its not life and death whether or not someone else thinks you learned something. Ok-I'm not sure how much of that was me, but it started with Jared anyways. After I remembered that, I was still crying, but I at least had the courage to open my scriptures and other doctrine. I found great comfort in my Patriarchal Blessing-its never hit me hard like that before. Then I looked in Gordon B Hinckley's "Stand a Little Taller" and found what his comment for today was. My goodness-it was entitled Rise to Your Potential, and spoke of not taking on more than you can handle, but setting achievable goals and having faith in yourself; of doing what you can in the best way you know how, and how that will work miracles in your life. I saw God's hand in my life today in full force, in a way I don't think I've understood before. The moment I asked for His help, it was everywhere I looked, and it was exactly what I needed to know and hear. After that, I walked to my trombone lesson. He just started talking about how stressful his freshman year was, and how its ok-you just need to pace yourself. Don't be hard on yourself, but analyze what you're doing and figure out how to make it better. He then commented on how far I had come, regardless of what I thought of myself. Remember, I got braces the week before I came here last semester, and I got the second row just over two weeks ago, so I've had to start all over twice.
I feel like I really don't deserve all these blessings-all the miniscule ways God lets me know He cares, in everything I do. I know I don't deserve these blessings-but I will do my best to.
***Funny, nonreligious-in case Kristina should want to read it.
Oh-A friend of mine, another bass player down here (named Jake) went to Auburn. Our jazz bands have actually competed against each other-I'm pretty sure I remember seeing him, and he says that I looked familiar. Funniest part, though, is he got into the Evergreen Music Festival or something like that-apparently it was some huge, competitive symphonic band. There he had the lovely pleasure of meeting one Michael Faris, someone who has left a lasting impression on his mind. Apparently, Faris got kicked out for selling Viagra to one of the other musicians. Muwahahaha....silly Faris. Weird, huh? I mean-I don't doubt that Faris did that at all, but that Jake remembers it so well. He said, "yeah, that Faris guy-he really ticked me off..." etc. etc. Anyways-for anyone who knows Faris, I thought this was funny.
I'm really busy and stressed, but today I realized that it would all be okay. Somehow, it will work out. With God's help, I can handle all this. I can do 10 hours of class and 5 hours of practice every day. I can handle being dejected from the jazz band after they told me I was in. I can handle music theory and ear training. I can handle not having many friends right now, since I'm spending all my time in classes, ensembles, and with my trombone, bass, or piano.
I broke down today-I never did last semester, and I got a 3.8 last semester. It got so hard so fast this time, and I started crying like a week before the AP test. Funny, I remembered what Jared said to me that day. That everything will be okay, whether you pass or not. It was a fun experience anyways, but its not life and death whether or not someone else thinks you learned something. Ok-I'm not sure how much of that was me, but it started with Jared anyways. After I remembered that, I was still crying, but I at least had the courage to open my scriptures and other doctrine. I found great comfort in my Patriarchal Blessing-its never hit me hard like that before. Then I looked in Gordon B Hinckley's "Stand a Little Taller" and found what his comment for today was. My goodness-it was entitled Rise to Your Potential, and spoke of not taking on more than you can handle, but setting achievable goals and having faith in yourself; of doing what you can in the best way you know how, and how that will work miracles in your life. I saw God's hand in my life today in full force, in a way I don't think I've understood before. The moment I asked for His help, it was everywhere I looked, and it was exactly what I needed to know and hear. After that, I walked to my trombone lesson. He just started talking about how stressful his freshman year was, and how its ok-you just need to pace yourself. Don't be hard on yourself, but analyze what you're doing and figure out how to make it better. He then commented on how far I had come, regardless of what I thought of myself. Remember, I got braces the week before I came here last semester, and I got the second row just over two weeks ago, so I've had to start all over twice.
I feel like I really don't deserve all these blessings-all the miniscule ways God lets me know He cares, in everything I do. I know I don't deserve these blessings-but I will do my best to.
***Funny, nonreligious-in case Kristina should want to read it.
Oh-A friend of mine, another bass player down here (named Jake) went to Auburn. Our jazz bands have actually competed against each other-I'm pretty sure I remember seeing him, and he says that I looked familiar. Funniest part, though, is he got into the Evergreen Music Festival or something like that-apparently it was some huge, competitive symphonic band. There he had the lovely pleasure of meeting one Michael Faris, someone who has left a lasting impression on his mind. Apparently, Faris got kicked out for selling Viagra to one of the other musicians. Muwahahaha....silly Faris. Weird, huh? I mean-I don't doubt that Faris did that at all, but that Jake remembers it so well. He said, "yeah, that Faris guy-he really ticked me off..." etc. etc. Anyways-for anyone who knows Faris, I thought this was funny.