(no subject)
Last round! The next opening date for apps will be announced shortly!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. GOOD ENOUGH sleepy mod is sleepy.
Character: Horus
Series: American Gods
Character age: N/A (appears mid- to late teens)
Canon: In Horus' canon, every god that is imagined and believed in, exists. And every god that has ever been imagined and believed in, and then abandoned... still exists. They may be sitting next to you in an airplane, or washing your car, or soliciting you on street corners.
Or, they could be cavorting around buck naked and eating roadkill, like Horus.
Horus was once the ancient Egyptian god of the sun. Now, after spending some three-and-a-half thousand years stuck in hostile Middle America, Horus is--in the words of a contemporary--bugfuck crazy. Horus spends almost all his time as a hawk, and when he isn't a hawk, he's a naked young man who speaks in an oddly stilted manner, seems to have memory and/or attention span issues, and still eats roadkill.
On the other hand, Horus, as alien as he seems at a glance, does have some significant depths to him, and is able to interact with others on more levels than just okay-yeah-this-guy's-a-headcase. There were some concerns over sustainability the last time I tried apping Horus, and there was a mini-essay on the topic, but here I'll just summarize its contents thusly: He has emotions and motivations. He has a sense of right and wrong. Canon has portrayed him with all the psychological complexities and all the banal and exotic components of humanity that are needed to form lasting interpersonal relationships; whether or not this is enough, I'll leave for you to judge.
Sample Post:
Brother, sun-brother who is not my brother, where have you gone? I am not where he has been, I think, and I cannot sense him any more. Am I still in America? I must be. It is an unholy place. This place is very unholy. I can feel it pressing against me, like darkness or a plague.
It itches.
Or perhaps it is simply the brambles upon which I sit that itch. Unholiness and poisoned oak. That is America. Unholy poisoned oak and hunger. I am hungry still. They gave me a gun, they did, though who it was that did, I cannot say. A gun. Guns are useless to me. I can banish the clouds from the sky; I can coax the dawn into day; I can call the sun from down the heavens, if I so wish. I can, still, even now. My mother taught me. But she did not teach me to use a gun, so I do not know how to do that. Elsewhere, the Americans lay down offerings on their roads, with their big noisy motor chariots. Offerings to no one, and free for the taking.
There are no offerings here, and the small things are difficult to kill. I have tried to take a squirrel or two, but they have banded against me and are now staging a communist uprising.
I do not know much about communists, except that they are from Russia, where parties can always find you, and that they are red and they scream about "THE JULY REVOLUTION!!!11ONEDYELEVEN" and all rush in to hurt you when you try to eat them. The toucans are aiding them, also. The gorillas have offered to help me quell the uprising, but I confess I do not know much about gorilla warfare. I simply wish for a meal. I do not care if dominoes fall and infect the zombies with communists. They will not feel the teeth and claws and beaks anyway, seeing as they are zombies.
I am going to go find something else to eat.
Poll Vote!
Character: Yako Katsuragi
Series: Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro
Character Age: 16
Canon: Once upon a time there was a very normal girl named Yako Katsuragi. She had a normal family, a normal friends and about as normal of a life as anybody could hope for. At least, until her father went and got himself murdered.
The confusion surrounding his death caught the attention of a riddle eating demon known as Nougami Neuro, who had come to earth after the mysteries of hell began to bore him. Needing somebody to help pretend to be a human, he solved the mystery behind her father’s death and then hired her to more or less work as his servant/punching bag. They begin solving more mysteries, Yako under the guise of a master detective with Neuro pretending to be her assistant.
Yako’s normally a fairly polite and cheerful person, but often gets exasperated by the weird things happening around her. She tries to remain as normal as she can in her given circumstances, but this proves to a rather difficult task, and she can’t quite help giving a little yelp of surprise every time she sees tentacles sprout out of her takoyaki or a chef suddenly turn in to the Incredible Hulk.
One of the few things she she‘s shown a real passion for is eating, and she’d like to be a food critic when she grows up... Providing that she doesn’t die a horrible death first.
Sample Post:
Hello, m-my name is Yako. The great detective Katsuragi Yako, here to aid you in the immediate capture of the notorious criminal who killed your fiance and... and ensure that he gets no less than the most brutal punishment possible. I’m also available for any other service you require, s-such as trash disposal, boot-licking, general projectile use and... Oh god, what did he write here? I can’t just say something like that! Does he really expect me to-
Hey, give that back! You can’t just take something from a person without asking them first, especially when they’re in the middle of reading it and- Don’t EAT it!
Well, I guess that wraps up our introductions. Sorry for yelling at you... Things can get pretty weird when someone close to you is murdered, and I can’t really blame you for acting out like that. But like I said, I’m here to try and catch whoever did this. I’m not sure how much I can do until my assistant arrives, but... You’re not really the director, are you?
...I knew it. Something about the description “tall, dark, hairy and purple” seemed kind of suspicious in the first place. Well, umm... sorry for the mix-up! If you don’t need anything, I’ll be going now. Lots of work to do! I can’t believe I just spent nearly five minutes trying to talk to a gorilla! The swamp gas must be getting to my head.
Geez... I haven’t been to summer camp in years, but I don’t remember it being anything like this. I mean, it’s like something out of a horror movie... In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if it IS something out of a horror movie. Reality shows are pretty popular these days, and it would explain all the weird people running around in costume. At least I THINK they’re costumes. Corpses don’t just get up and walk around like that... When you’re dead, you’re dead.
But I guess I should go find the real director, if I can get things sorted out and do what I can before Neuro gets here, maybe we’ll be able to... to...
Was that a tentacle? I could have sworn I just saw a giant tentacle come out of the lake for a second and- Oh god there it is again. But I’m sure it’s just a squid! Giant tentacle monsters only exist in movies! So there’s no way there could be one here, right?
...And it’s a giant tentacle monster. Neuro would love this place.
Poll Vote!
Character: Marco
Series: The Animorphs
Character Age: 15
Canon: In a stunning move of brillance, a dying alien gave five young humans the power to "morph" (that is, to shapeshift) into an exact genetic duplicate of any creature that they can physically touch. They may stay in morph for only two hours, otherwise they will remain in that shape for the rest of their lives. Why did this alien give teenagers this ability? Why, so that they could fight off a secret invasion of parasitic alien slugs known as Yeerks, of course. However, since it's a secret invasion, the kids are little more than terrorists in their activities.
As an only child, Marco has spent the last few years raising himself as his father recovered from the so-called death of his mother, who is nowhere near as dead as the Yeerks would like the world to think. A snarky, sarcastic little smart-ass, Marco likes to crack jokes to break the tension when he and his friends get into trouble. He's the comic relief of the group, though he can be ruthless and determined when it's needed, as he's the one who sees the big picture, and acts accordingly. At one point, to "act accordingly" resulted in his own (temporary) death. His major "battle morph" is that of a gorilla.
Sample Post:
There's that saying that "time flys when you're having fun", and yeah, I've lost an hour or two or three when playing videogames. I'm not denying that it's true. I'm just saying that I think this is stretching it just a little too far.
There's no way that it's 2007. There's no way I've managed to lose ten years to "having fun"; especially since the last time I checked the anniversary of my mom's death doesn't count in any way possible as being fun. Generally speaking, it's a whole lot of the opposite of fun. And yet, here I am. Holding a newspaper that can't possibly be real and standing in the middle of an impossible daydream scripted by George Romero.
I'm a fan, really I am, but I think that this might just be taking it a bit too far guys. Dressing up in costume for a movie premier or halloween is one thing. The whole honest to god decay bit is somewhere else on a scale of one to left turn at Albuquerque.
The creepy-crawlies aside, what really gets to me is the fact that this newspaper that I refuse to believe was handed to me by a gorilla. A gorilla, people. Gorillas aren't exactly native to Louisiana-- and why I'm in Louisiana is another one of those questions I'm still trying to answer-- but maybe some guy with money to spare likes to have free range gorillas on their property. It wouldn't be the weirdest thing in my life.
What tops it all though? That would have to be the parade float. It's a nice float; I am completely impressed with the craftsmanship of my fellow primates. There's just one little problem, and it's not with the float, so please put that down now you wonderful, kind, scary gorilla guy... Like I was saying, there's just one itty bitty little problem here. I am aware that I am fantastically cute and attractive, but this perfect hairless face? This is not the face of a gorilla. That would mean I don't need to be on the float. Really. You can go on about your business, and I'll be over here. Watching. From behind this tree where you can't see me. I am totally and completely there with you in spirit!
Gorilla Gay Pride Parade. This is insane.
Poll Vote!
Character: Luneth
Character Age: 16
Series: Final Fantasy III (DS)
Canon: Final Fantasy III is a recently-updated game regarding the (dubiously) epic story of four teenagers destined to be the legendary 'Warriors of Light', blessed by elemental crystals scattered across the world - before we get too impressed, the main gift given to the Warriors of Light by the crystals seems to be the ability to change their clothes and weapons, which is supposedly an ability everyone else does not have. Their noble quest, of course, is to save said world; overall, it is a colourful story of people overcoming obstacles and becoming greater than they dreamed they could be, of course in a flamboyantly gay fashion. It's a proper fantasy tale, with princesses and dragons and strangely-dressed Vikings - well. Perhaps in some senses it is unconventional.
Luneth is an adventurous, free-spirited sixteen year old orphan from a small village, who eventually becomes the leader of the Warriors of Light, not to mention their motivational speaker. He, like the others, is thrown into the quest headfirst, and throughout the game we see his world view, morals and principles develop from a child's to an adult's, despite his age. However, he begins his quest by falling into a hole - something that he has apparently done before, and that should tell you all you need to know about his levels of common sense.
Sample Post:
Hey! 'Scuse me, sir. Really, you. Come on now, who'd you think I was talking to, the wall? Saying that, I suppose you could make that mistake, since you seem to be, uhm, grinding against it... I'm trying to say something, do you think you could stop contorting there and listen a second? Thank you. Now, I just had an bit of an accident with regard to a hole - trust me, really not the first time, you think I'd start watching out for the silly things after a while - and I think I might be unconscious. Can you just confirm for me that I'm having some sort of incident-related fantasy? It can't be anything else, anyway. Surely. Although, there may well be something wrong with me in that not only have I imagined a man like you, and forgive me but you're a little bit odd looking, but you also seem to be wearing a bright pink skirt. It's nice, though! The frills are just lovely.
What's your name, then? If you're part of some dream I'm having, I better have at least given you that somewhere along the line. ... No, I'm fairly sure that were I to have given you a name, it wouldn't be 'Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnghhhhhhhhhhhh
.' It's not very original, is it? No. I think I'll call you George, if you don't want to tell me your name, and if you don't like it, then you'll have to tell me what I should call you! That's fair. So, George, do you want to give me a tour of this particular fantasy world? It's definitely not the usual one with the chocobos and the fluffy clouds... I'd like to see it all while I'm here! Wait, hang on - I can see some of your friends coming to join us. They all look a bit like you! Perfectly nice, I'm sure. Hello, all of you, I'm Luneth, and you're all a product of my brain! Isn't that strange? Maybe you'd like to introduce yourself first, sir--
No. I'm fairly sure that 'BRAAAAAAAINS' is not your name. Whoops. I see you don't have a nice skirt like George has, that's a pity. Maybe he can tell you where he got his - wait, what are you doing. Let go of me right now, sir, I am not your chew toy.
Mister George! I need some help over here, could you give me a hand? I think otherwise I'm going to get maimed.
... When I said 'give me a hand', I didn't actually want one. One of yours. That is. I am going to wake up. I am going to wake up. I am going to wake up.
Now see here, you lot. I've put up with a lot of rudeness from you already. I'm one of the Warriors of Light, and I assure you that if you hit me with that ... limb ohmygodohmygod one more time I will cut you.
... More than you already are cut. That is.
Heeeeeeeelp.
Poll Vote!
Character: Hiro Sohma
Series: Fruits Basket
Character Age: 12
Canon: Fruits Basket is a romantic comedy showing that blind optimism can get you through any situation, even if it includes shy boys who frequently end up naked. These aforementioned boys are from the Sohma family, who are born with the terrible curse. This fatal curse is so horrible, fatal, and terrifying, that many are mentally scarred over it, often requiring therapy or their memory to be wiped.
Cursed members turn into adorable animals.
More specifically, they turn into an animal of the Chinese Zodiac when hugged by the opposite gender.
Hiro is the ram of the zodiac, and despite his cute appearance and young age, he is the fast-talking, smart aleck, prince-of-snark in the series. He will not hesitate to talk you down or take advantage of you, regardless of age or gender. He often complains about the smallest things, being a brat and a hypocrite as well.
Despite acting this way with everyone, there are a few people Hiro has soft spots for. The main one being his crush, Kisa, the tiger of the zodiac. Hiro will do anything to make her happy, even if it includes frequently visiting Tohru, whom he dislikes and sees as a rival since she is a large object of Kisa’s affection. Hiro is the only zodiac member with healthy family relationships.
Sample Post:
Geez, what a pain! When they organized the class hiking trip, did the teachers stop to think that some kids might not be athletic? Or maybe they just don’t like hiking. If a teacher of all people can’t even tell that, it’s a wonder how they get anything done at all.
Like right now, for example. It’s definitely not my fault I got lost. I mean, if they had stopped to take a break, I wouldn’t have had to do it myself, then had to end up fording a swamp! Yeah, real responsible. Just wait until my parents hear about this. Or maybe not mom right away. She might trip over in shock or something. Tch.
And where am I now, anyways? The only sign I’ve seen is something that says “CFUD Banana Wang this way”. How can someone expect a person to understand what that means? It’s not even the least bit helpful, and what it implies is completely gross. Didn’t they ever consider that a kid like me could stumble onto it? I mean, one day I’m just walking around and minding my own business, then Bam! There goes my innocence. And people wonder why the world is such a corrupt place. Hypocrites. With a sign like that, I bet this place’ll start giving out something lethal like-
--Ow! What’d you just throw at me?! …A shotgun? Wow. Congratulations, you stupid place, you’ve just managed to out-do yourself. I could have whatever this place sued, you know. Giving out this sort of this sort of thing to minors? I can’t believe you actually expect to get away with that. I do know some influential people, you know. But if you’ve got nothing better to do than wonder if a kid is legal or not you-- No, I didn’t mean it like that, you stupid ape, put your hands back down.
…Aaah, this is stupid! I’m wasting my time to an over-grown monkey! I don’t even want to be here in the first place! Fine. Hey monkey! Yes you, either leave me alone, or I shoot you.
For the record, if I actually do shoot anything, it’ll be this place’s fault. I’m just an innocent kid, after all.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. GOOD ENOUGH sleepy mod is sleepy.
Character: Horus
Series: American Gods
Character age: N/A (appears mid- to late teens)
Canon: In Horus' canon, every god that is imagined and believed in, exists. And every god that has ever been imagined and believed in, and then abandoned... still exists. They may be sitting next to you in an airplane, or washing your car, or soliciting you on street corners.
Or, they could be cavorting around buck naked and eating roadkill, like Horus.
Horus was once the ancient Egyptian god of the sun. Now, after spending some three-and-a-half thousand years stuck in hostile Middle America, Horus is--in the words of a contemporary--bugfuck crazy. Horus spends almost all his time as a hawk, and when he isn't a hawk, he's a naked young man who speaks in an oddly stilted manner, seems to have memory and/or attention span issues, and still eats roadkill.
On the other hand, Horus, as alien as he seems at a glance, does have some significant depths to him, and is able to interact with others on more levels than just okay-yeah-this-guy's-a-headcase. There were some concerns over sustainability the last time I tried apping Horus, and there was a mini-essay on the topic, but here I'll just summarize its contents thusly: He has emotions and motivations. He has a sense of right and wrong. Canon has portrayed him with all the psychological complexities and all the banal and exotic components of humanity that are needed to form lasting interpersonal relationships; whether or not this is enough, I'll leave for you to judge.
Sample Post:
Brother, sun-brother who is not my brother, where have you gone? I am not where he has been, I think, and I cannot sense him any more. Am I still in America? I must be. It is an unholy place. This place is very unholy. I can feel it pressing against me, like darkness or a plague.
It itches.
Or perhaps it is simply the brambles upon which I sit that itch. Unholiness and poisoned oak. That is America. Unholy poisoned oak and hunger. I am hungry still. They gave me a gun, they did, though who it was that did, I cannot say. A gun. Guns are useless to me. I can banish the clouds from the sky; I can coax the dawn into day; I can call the sun from down the heavens, if I so wish. I can, still, even now. My mother taught me. But she did not teach me to use a gun, so I do not know how to do that. Elsewhere, the Americans lay down offerings on their roads, with their big noisy motor chariots. Offerings to no one, and free for the taking.
There are no offerings here, and the small things are difficult to kill. I have tried to take a squirrel or two, but they have banded against me and are now staging a communist uprising.
I do not know much about communists, except that they are from Russia, where parties can always find you, and that they are red and they scream about "THE JULY REVOLUTION!!!11ONEDYELEVEN" and all rush in to hurt you when you try to eat them. The toucans are aiding them, also. The gorillas have offered to help me quell the uprising, but I confess I do not know much about gorilla warfare. I simply wish for a meal. I do not care if dominoes fall and infect the zombies with communists. They will not feel the teeth and claws and beaks anyway, seeing as they are zombies.
I am going to go find something else to eat.
Poll Vote!
Character: Yako Katsuragi
Series: Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro
Character Age: 16
Canon: Once upon a time there was a very normal girl named Yako Katsuragi. She had a normal family, a normal friends and about as normal of a life as anybody could hope for. At least, until her father went and got himself murdered.
The confusion surrounding his death caught the attention of a riddle eating demon known as Nougami Neuro, who had come to earth after the mysteries of hell began to bore him. Needing somebody to help pretend to be a human, he solved the mystery behind her father’s death and then hired her to more or less work as his servant/punching bag. They begin solving more mysteries, Yako under the guise of a master detective with Neuro pretending to be her assistant.
Yako’s normally a fairly polite and cheerful person, but often gets exasperated by the weird things happening around her. She tries to remain as normal as she can in her given circumstances, but this proves to a rather difficult task, and she can’t quite help giving a little yelp of surprise every time she sees tentacles sprout out of her takoyaki or a chef suddenly turn in to the Incredible Hulk.
One of the few things she she‘s shown a real passion for is eating, and she’d like to be a food critic when she grows up... Providing that she doesn’t die a horrible death first.
Sample Post:
Hello, m-my name is Yako. The great detective Katsuragi Yako, here to aid you in the immediate capture of the notorious criminal who killed your fiance and... and ensure that he gets no less than the most brutal punishment possible. I’m also available for any other service you require, s-such as trash disposal, boot-licking, general projectile use and... Oh god, what did he write here? I can’t just say something like that! Does he really expect me to-
Hey, give that back! You can’t just take something from a person without asking them first, especially when they’re in the middle of reading it and- Don’t EAT it!
Well, I guess that wraps up our introductions. Sorry for yelling at you... Things can get pretty weird when someone close to you is murdered, and I can’t really blame you for acting out like that. But like I said, I’m here to try and catch whoever did this. I’m not sure how much I can do until my assistant arrives, but... You’re not really the director, are you?
...I knew it. Something about the description “tall, dark, hairy and purple” seemed kind of suspicious in the first place. Well, umm... sorry for the mix-up! If you don’t need anything, I’ll be going now. Lots of work to do! I can’t believe I just spent nearly five minutes trying to talk to a gorilla! The swamp gas must be getting to my head.
Geez... I haven’t been to summer camp in years, but I don’t remember it being anything like this. I mean, it’s like something out of a horror movie... In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if it IS something out of a horror movie. Reality shows are pretty popular these days, and it would explain all the weird people running around in costume. At least I THINK they’re costumes. Corpses don’t just get up and walk around like that... When you’re dead, you’re dead.
But I guess I should go find the real director, if I can get things sorted out and do what I can before Neuro gets here, maybe we’ll be able to... to...
Was that a tentacle? I could have sworn I just saw a giant tentacle come out of the lake for a second and- Oh god there it is again. But I’m sure it’s just a squid! Giant tentacle monsters only exist in movies! So there’s no way there could be one here, right?
...And it’s a giant tentacle monster. Neuro would love this place.
Poll Vote!
Character: Marco
Series: The Animorphs
Character Age: 15
Canon: In a stunning move of brillance, a dying alien gave five young humans the power to "morph" (that is, to shapeshift) into an exact genetic duplicate of any creature that they can physically touch. They may stay in morph for only two hours, otherwise they will remain in that shape for the rest of their lives. Why did this alien give teenagers this ability? Why, so that they could fight off a secret invasion of parasitic alien slugs known as Yeerks, of course. However, since it's a secret invasion, the kids are little more than terrorists in their activities.
As an only child, Marco has spent the last few years raising himself as his father recovered from the so-called death of his mother, who is nowhere near as dead as the Yeerks would like the world to think. A snarky, sarcastic little smart-ass, Marco likes to crack jokes to break the tension when he and his friends get into trouble. He's the comic relief of the group, though he can be ruthless and determined when it's needed, as he's the one who sees the big picture, and acts accordingly. At one point, to "act accordingly" resulted in his own (temporary) death. His major "battle morph" is that of a gorilla.
Sample Post:
There's that saying that "time flys when you're having fun", and yeah, I've lost an hour or two or three when playing videogames. I'm not denying that it's true. I'm just saying that I think this is stretching it just a little too far.
There's no way that it's 2007. There's no way I've managed to lose ten years to "having fun"; especially since the last time I checked the anniversary of my mom's death doesn't count in any way possible as being fun. Generally speaking, it's a whole lot of the opposite of fun. And yet, here I am. Holding a newspaper that can't possibly be real and standing in the middle of an impossible daydream scripted by George Romero.
I'm a fan, really I am, but I think that this might just be taking it a bit too far guys. Dressing up in costume for a movie premier or halloween is one thing. The whole honest to god decay bit is somewhere else on a scale of one to left turn at Albuquerque.
The creepy-crawlies aside, what really gets to me is the fact that this newspaper that I refuse to believe was handed to me by a gorilla. A gorilla, people. Gorillas aren't exactly native to Louisiana-- and why I'm in Louisiana is another one of those questions I'm still trying to answer-- but maybe some guy with money to spare likes to have free range gorillas on their property. It wouldn't be the weirdest thing in my life.
What tops it all though? That would have to be the parade float. It's a nice float; I am completely impressed with the craftsmanship of my fellow primates. There's just one little problem, and it's not with the float, so please put that down now you wonderful, kind, scary gorilla guy... Like I was saying, there's just one itty bitty little problem here. I am aware that I am fantastically cute and attractive, but this perfect hairless face? This is not the face of a gorilla. That would mean I don't need to be on the float. Really. You can go on about your business, and I'll be over here. Watching. From behind this tree where you can't see me. I am totally and completely there with you in spirit!
Gorilla Gay Pride Parade. This is insane.
Poll Vote!
Character: Luneth
Character Age: 16
Series: Final Fantasy III (DS)
Canon: Final Fantasy III is a recently-updated game regarding the (dubiously) epic story of four teenagers destined to be the legendary 'Warriors of Light', blessed by elemental crystals scattered across the world - before we get too impressed, the main gift given to the Warriors of Light by the crystals seems to be the ability to change their clothes and weapons, which is supposedly an ability everyone else does not have. Their noble quest, of course, is to save said world; overall, it is a colourful story of people overcoming obstacles and becoming greater than they dreamed they could be, of course in a flamboyantly gay fashion. It's a proper fantasy tale, with princesses and dragons and strangely-dressed Vikings - well. Perhaps in some senses it is unconventional.
Luneth is an adventurous, free-spirited sixteen year old orphan from a small village, who eventually becomes the leader of the Warriors of Light, not to mention their motivational speaker. He, like the others, is thrown into the quest headfirst, and throughout the game we see his world view, morals and principles develop from a child's to an adult's, despite his age. However, he begins his quest by falling into a hole - something that he has apparently done before, and that should tell you all you need to know about his levels of common sense.
Sample Post:
Hey! 'Scuse me, sir. Really, you. Come on now, who'd you think I was talking to, the wall? Saying that, I suppose you could make that mistake, since you seem to be, uhm, grinding against it... I'm trying to say something, do you think you could stop contorting there and listen a second? Thank you. Now, I just had an bit of an accident with regard to a hole - trust me, really not the first time, you think I'd start watching out for the silly things after a while - and I think I might be unconscious. Can you just confirm for me that I'm having some sort of incident-related fantasy? It can't be anything else, anyway. Surely. Although, there may well be something wrong with me in that not only have I imagined a man like you, and forgive me but you're a little bit odd looking, but you also seem to be wearing a bright pink skirt. It's nice, though! The frills are just lovely.
What's your name, then? If you're part of some dream I'm having, I better have at least given you that somewhere along the line. ... No, I'm fairly sure that were I to have given you a name, it wouldn't be 'Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnghhhhhhhhhhhh
.' It's not very original, is it? No. I think I'll call you George, if you don't want to tell me your name, and if you don't like it, then you'll have to tell me what I should call you! That's fair. So, George, do you want to give me a tour of this particular fantasy world? It's definitely not the usual one with the chocobos and the fluffy clouds... I'd like to see it all while I'm here! Wait, hang on - I can see some of your friends coming to join us. They all look a bit like you! Perfectly nice, I'm sure. Hello, all of you, I'm Luneth, and you're all a product of my brain! Isn't that strange? Maybe you'd like to introduce yourself first, sir--
No. I'm fairly sure that 'BRAAAAAAAINS' is not your name. Whoops. I see you don't have a nice skirt like George has, that's a pity. Maybe he can tell you where he got his - wait, what are you doing. Let go of me right now, sir, I am not your chew toy.
Mister George! I need some help over here, could you give me a hand? I think otherwise I'm going to get maimed.
... When I said 'give me a hand', I didn't actually want one. One of yours. That is. I am going to wake up. I am going to wake up. I am going to wake up.
Now see here, you lot. I've put up with a lot of rudeness from you already. I'm one of the Warriors of Light, and I assure you that if you hit me with that ... limb ohmygodohmygod one more time I will cut you.
... More than you already are cut. That is.
Heeeeeeeelp.
Poll Vote!
Character: Hiro Sohma
Series: Fruits Basket
Character Age: 12
Canon: Fruits Basket is a romantic comedy showing that blind optimism can get you through any situation, even if it includes shy boys who frequently end up naked. These aforementioned boys are from the Sohma family, who are born with the terrible curse. This fatal curse is so horrible, fatal, and terrifying, that many are mentally scarred over it, often requiring therapy or their memory to be wiped.
Cursed members turn into adorable animals.
More specifically, they turn into an animal of the Chinese Zodiac when hugged by the opposite gender.
Hiro is the ram of the zodiac, and despite his cute appearance and young age, he is the fast-talking, smart aleck, prince-of-snark in the series. He will not hesitate to talk you down or take advantage of you, regardless of age or gender. He often complains about the smallest things, being a brat and a hypocrite as well.
Despite acting this way with everyone, there are a few people Hiro has soft spots for. The main one being his crush, Kisa, the tiger of the zodiac. Hiro will do anything to make her happy, even if it includes frequently visiting Tohru, whom he dislikes and sees as a rival since she is a large object of Kisa’s affection. Hiro is the only zodiac member with healthy family relationships.
Sample Post:
Geez, what a pain! When they organized the class hiking trip, did the teachers stop to think that some kids might not be athletic? Or maybe they just don’t like hiking. If a teacher of all people can’t even tell that, it’s a wonder how they get anything done at all.
Like right now, for example. It’s definitely not my fault I got lost. I mean, if they had stopped to take a break, I wouldn’t have had to do it myself, then had to end up fording a swamp! Yeah, real responsible. Just wait until my parents hear about this. Or maybe not mom right away. She might trip over in shock or something. Tch.
And where am I now, anyways? The only sign I’ve seen is something that says “CFUD Banana Wang this way”. How can someone expect a person to understand what that means? It’s not even the least bit helpful, and what it implies is completely gross. Didn’t they ever consider that a kid like me could stumble onto it? I mean, one day I’m just walking around and minding my own business, then Bam! There goes my innocence. And people wonder why the world is such a corrupt place. Hypocrites. With a sign like that, I bet this place’ll start giving out something lethal like-
--Ow! What’d you just throw at me?! …A shotgun? Wow. Congratulations, you stupid place, you’ve just managed to out-do yourself. I could have whatever this place sued, you know. Giving out this sort of this sort of thing to minors? I can’t believe you actually expect to get away with that. I do know some influential people, you know. But if you’ve got nothing better to do than wonder if a kid is legal or not you-- No, I didn’t mean it like that, you stupid ape, put your hands back down.
…Aaah, this is stupid! I’m wasting my time to an over-grown monkey! I don’t even want to be here in the first place! Fine. Hey monkey! Yes you, either leave me alone, or I shoot you.
For the record, if I actually do shoot anything, it’ll be this place’s fault. I’m just an innocent kid, after all.
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