(no subject)
OKAY! Next round! There's one more round after this.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. C-closed!
Character Name: Portgas D. Ace
Series: One
Piece
Character Age: 20
Canon: : One Piece is a story about dreams, courage,
adventure, friendship, and most importantly, it's about a bunch of pirates
trying to find the legendary treasure - One Piece - to become the next
Pirate King. Monkey D. Luffy is one such pirate, and the story follows him
and his crew on this quest.
Ace is Luffy's older brother, who left home three years before Luffy did. He
is the commander of the Second Division of the Whitebeard Pirates, one of
the most most feared pirates in the whole Grand Line. His dream is to make
Whitebeard the Pirate King, as opposite to Luffy's dream of becoming the
Pirate King himself. In the series, he is searching for a pirate named
Blackbeard to avenge the death of another division leader in his crew.
An intelligent and polite individual, Ace shows good insight into situations
and can be very observant. He is full of confidence and is seen always with
a smirk/grin on his face. He is probably one of the most powerful Devil Fruit users on the
Grand Line, having eaten the "Mera Mera" Fruit, which gives him fire
manipulation abilities and his reputation as "Fire Fist Ace". He is narcoleptic, and is prone
to falling asleep on random occasions, especially when he's
eating.
Sample Post:
My most sincere apologies, ma'am. I was completely unaware of the fact that
I was standing on your... arm. And I'm terribly sorry for the dirt and
footprints, ma'am. Here, let me wipe it for you. Although, I must say,
these are some unique traits you people have on this island. Grey and
mustard-coloured skin, detachable limbs, this slow, shuffling way of walking
- as well as threatening strangers with chainsaws.
I can tell that you don't like pirates, but I'm just here to ask for
information, so if you'll please? My name's Ace, and I'm searching for a
man. Another pirate called Blackbeard. You might have heard of him.
Sorry, what? Brains? I take that means no? Well, then have you- No, ma'am,
please don't touch the hat.
I meant it. Don't touch the hat. And I wouldn't advise coming at me with
that chainsaw you have over there either. I told you, I'm just here to ask
for information, not to cause trouble-
Sorry, but I warned you.
....
.... Well, that was fruitful. This is becoming rather tiring. Apparently I
missed Blackbeard by three days at the last town I visited, and nobody knew
where he was headed. And this lady asked me whether I would like to find the
answers to all my questions. I said well depends, yes, if you can do that,
since that'll make my search much easier, and she gave me this pamphlet.
What did it say again? It was pretty funny... Now where did I put
that thing... Ah, here it is - Looking for something? Or simply
searching for answers? Then look no further! Camp Fuck You Die -
where you'll find the Answer to The Ultimate Question Of Life, the Universe
and Everything.
Definitely a strange way to advertise a place, but the co-ordinates were
nearby and I thought I could check it out. And this sure is a sober town - I
haven't seen a restaurant anywhere for the past five hours- Oh hey there!
The townsmen over there! Can one of you point me to the nearest restaurant?
I'm starving.
You want my name? Ace. And some people call me Fire Fist-
Well, no. I'm sorry, but I'm not the replacement oven you people were
waiting for. I'm just stopping by to try to find some answers-
....No, I'm not your new campfire either. Nor am I- what? Okay, so
yes, people call me "Fire Fist Ace", but geez, I am quite sure that I'm
not the Fire Fist you're looking for.
Again, I'm telling you. No.
....Do I look like a vibrator to you?
Poll Vote!
Character: Sarugaki Hiyori
Series: Bleach
Character Age: Unknown, but appears as a 10-14 years old girl
Canon: Once upon a time, a group of shinigami committed the ultimate taboo of acquiring hollow's power. Equipped with their zanpukuto and the newly-acquired ugly masks, they become better-stronger-faster and are now known as the vizards. Their backgrounds are unknown; their full powers are unknown; and their true motive, as you can guess by now, is also unknown. The only thing we did know about them is that they're a group of interesting people (ranging from gentle big guy to porn-loving girl), who help Ichigo with his training.
So, Hiyori is one of these mysterious masked warriors. She's grumpy, rude and hot-headed. If you ever see her around, she's probably doing one of the following: shouting, arguing, beating up Ichigo and fellow vizard, Hirako. However, her best insult is calling people "baldy"; and the verbal and physical abuses are signs of friendship, really. Anyway, even though Hiyori is a proud and confident tomboy, she does have one-to-two-pages of "human-and-shinigami-hate-us" emo and is capable of being frightened. Also, she slaps people with sandal.
Sample Post:
Alright you baldy, listen up! The next person who starts whinin' about how this place sucks? I'm gonna kill you! By pouring hot soup into your fuckin' brain though yer eye socket, yer ear canal and yer nose. Then crush your damn skull into billions pieces. And feed yer medium-rare brain to those friggin' zombies! Got it?
Really. All I can hear since I got here is complain, complain, and more friggin' complain. Well. I don't give a shit to your bitching. But it's fuckin' annoying. If ya really want to bitch about how yer life sucks? Fine. Just do it under the sea. I'm sure that those gay singing fish would make ya happy.
But. Guess what? Y'all baldy better stop complaining about this place. Look, whatever this place is... What? Camp Fuck You Die, huh? Real interesting name for a summer camp. I'm so envious of the Director's awesome naming skill. Too bad that this place can't live up to its name, though. I mean, look at the so-call site attraction here? Moanin' about braaaiiiiiiiins like a freakin' baby. Staggerin' like a three-legged tortoise. And completely fell apart after a little slap on its face. Even the Made-in-China zombies that can only hop like friggin' bunnies are scarier. Totally worthless piece of shit. Pathetic. Really. If ya want to create a camp that can fuck people up? At least make some goddamn effort in maintaining the zombies. If these living dead are the best ya got? Ha. Even the Data Center can fuck people up better.
Anyway, what I want to say is that y'all should stop whining. If yer miserable, just go to have some fun with those friggin' zombies. I mean, who wouldn't feel better after blowing shits up? Besides, there're some real interesting traditions here. Man, mass marriages every month, huh? That sounds fun. Look, one of the zombies even gave me an invitation to a wedding between Epuuscaballa and Homosapienio. And-- The hell? What do you mean by wanting me to be their freakin' Ring Bearer?! Are ya freakin' blind?! I'm not a goddamn little boy! If-- God-dammit! Yer rotting flesh just ruined my sandal!
Okay, this freakin' stupid place is making me mad and hungry. Baldy Ichigo, wherever you are, go make me a sandwiches, now.
Poll Vote!
Character: Bugs Bunny
Series: Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies
Character Age: Looks and acts like a perpetual teenager (counting from his debut in A Wild Hare, he'd be 67)
Canon: Once upon a time, when animation was still young, the staff at Warner Brothers explored the world of cartoons, making, stretching, and outright breaking the very rules that they created. Hey, just like CFUD! Then, some fateful day, Tex Avery took the small white rabbit that had appeared in other shorts and gave him a definitive personality...
Bugs typifies the "little guy" in most cartoons, content to being a mostly ordinary rabbit until some outside threat (Elmer Fudd, Marvin the Martian, Yosemeti Sam, and opera, just to name a few) threatens his idyllic way of life. Although he doesn't always proceed to declare war, he does almost always thwart his opponents with sight gags, physical humor, trickery, and crossdressing. As a Warner cartoon, Bugs also has the power of Meta--he often breaks the fourth wall by addressing the audience (back when cartoons were played in theatres, this even sometimes features a sillouette), making pop culture references, and tweaking the rules of cartoon logic to his favor.
Sample Post:
I just know that Daffy's laughing at me, wherever he is. Hah. Like his sense of direction's that much better.
You'd figure I'd get myself a GPS mapajiggy by now. Or at least a tag or something.
*sigh* The things a rabbit has to do for the sake of comedy, I suppose.
Ah, excuse me, mac, I was wondering--
Why, yes, I'm Bugs Bunny, rabbit extraordinare. I'll be glad to sign an autograph for you--
*is smoooooooched*
Wow. Whatasmacker!
Waitaminute. This wasn't in the script.
--Ahem. Please conduct yourself like a lady, ma'am. This place might be post Hayes Code, but I'm afraid I'm a bit too old fashioned to keep up with all these newfangled ideas. Why, in my day, I had to walk up the hill! Both ways! Barefoot! In the snow!
Now, then, where was I? Oh, yes, directions. Maybe if I take a few more steps towards camera right...aha!
Uh...
"Rabbit Duck Zombie Season"?
"Destroying Your Childhood Memories Since 2005"?
...
"We Look Better Innadress"?!?
Of course you realize this means war.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kieran Trevarde
Series: The God Eaters by Jesse Hajicek
Character Age: 19
Canon:A mixture of Sci fi, Fantasy, Western and Prison Romance the God Eaters is a unique book and that requires unique characters. Thankfully Kieran Trevard fits the bill. An outlaw on the run for most of his life, Kieran knows how to survive. This proves useful when the authorities finally catch up with him and dump him into Churchrock, the darkest hole of a prison in the country. It's there that he meets Ashleigh Trine, a shy northern revolutionist, who agrees to join up with him and plan an escape. Together these two outcasts discover true freedom and find themselves major players in a battle between the gods.
Kieran is described as having a "razor-blades-in-candy" voice and a strong Iavaian drawl that thickens when he's at his deadliest. He's a sarcastic SOB with the stubbornness of a mule and enough cynicism to make an ancient god doubt himself. Ashleigh has managed to domesticate Kieran a bit (He doesn't kill as many people anymore?) but there ain't nothing that can completely fix this boy. Kieran's a dirty low down bastard with more than a few issues, but he does everyone a favor and doesn't let them get him down~
Sample Post:
Alright, waking up in the middle of nowhere? That I expected. The dead animated corpse spooning with me? Not so much. Now I can tell this place is..."special" in that cruel and unusual kind of way and something, oh let’s say the crazy magical barrier, tells me that leaving right this moment ain’t exactly encouraged.
So I figure, it might be best to get all the cards out on the table. Name's Kieran Trevarde. I ain't here to cause trouble. Hell, I don't even know how I got here. All I wanna do is find my partner and go. Whatever business y'all might have with the friendly critter in the lake or those funny little birds just ain't none of my concern.
I will admit that a tree sporting lacy panties and bras caught my attention, but you know what? I'm more than willing to ignore it and move on with my life. So if anyone or anything that isn't rotting, crazy, perverted or just plain weird could show the way out of this place, it'd be greatly appreciated.
Camp Fuck You Die? Director? Eternal torture and humiliation?
No see, I'm afraid you didn't quite understand. I've done my time, or part of it at least, and as nice as it is to have vines that welcome new comers with and without the assistance of soap, I just ain't interested. So unless you've seen a nearsighted red-head walking around recently I'm going to have to insist on knowing the way out. And just in case the singing metal screen is any sort of indication of the attitude here, let’s get one thing straight.
No one is riding this cowboy.
Poll Vote!
Character: Waya Yoshitaka
Series: Hikaru no Go
Age: 15
Canon: Hikaru no Go is a series about Go which involves a wide variety of characters. The main character, Shindou Hikaru, finds a haunted Go board and gets drawn in to the world of Go by the ghost named Sai. After meeting Touya Akira and assigning him as a personal rival, Hikaru sets out to improve his own Go abilities.
Waya Yoshitaka is an insei (a student of the Japanese Go Institute) who is in the process of trying to become a professional Go player. Besides playing, studying, and breathing Go, Waya also enjoys playing internet Go every now and then. He's rather quick to make friends, though he's very loyal to them.
Sample Post:
Alright. I'm down a DS, a pair of headphones, and some dental floss, but they were mostly necessary losses. I've still got my backpack, clothes, hairbrush, toothpaste, and my magnetic Go set. My tooth brush has gone missing. I've also got a cell phone, but there's no service anywhere. So, it's only good for throwing, really.
I had thought that my greatest worry at this godforsaken place would be finding someone who'd be willing to play Go. Then I discovered the ravenous trees of evil, scary half-dead-looking people aside. I'll never let them get away with eating my Gameboy. That was my Legend of Zelda game! I'm never making the mistake of underestimating a camp again.
Note to self: find duct tape and rope very, very fast. Lots of rope...
And I'm supposed to send postcards to Shindou or something. On the other hand, I could send Touya a souvenir. I wonder if you can keep severed branches alive long enough to arrive by package...
Poll Vote!
Character: Issun
Series: Okami
Character Age: Not listed anywhere I can find it. D: Longer-living than humans, but he looks like this, and acts pretty young.
Canon: Issun is from the PS2 game Okami. The main character is the sun goddess Amaterasu, nicknamed in the game Ammy, who is also a wolf. Although going by canon it's probably a lot more accurate to describe her as a doggie. She goes on world saving adventures with her trusty sidekick, Issun! Issun's basically like Navi only with an abundance of testosterone. And a personality. And a story line.
Issun is a member of the Poncle race, which means he is like one inch high and glows and sparkles and wears a large bug-shaped hat. Therefore for most of the game he looks like a little glowing bug, but he is actually person-shaped, and has issues with being called a bug. He has a sword/brush named Denkomaru which he will use to threaten people in tiny fits of machismo and/or paint things with. He does regular-type art as well as some Brush Techniques, a game mechanic that basically boils down to Combat/Puzzlesolving Calligraphy.
He is also a big perv - he will reliably and unsubtly hit on every female ever. He'll protest and bluster loudly about any perceived threats or insults to himself. He also likes to crack wise about the situations and people that you meet.
His heart is in the right place, though; not-so-secretly, he's a big softie. He's pretty brave, too. While he doesn't like the idea of facing imminent and terrible danger, and he'll protest, he'll give in easily enough. And then he'll be the one egging you on the loudest, or jumping first into the fray himself. Despite what he says at other times, if he's faced directly with danger or the unknown, his motto is to go ahead and jump in before thinking.
Sample Post:
Ahem ahem! It's me, the one you've all been waiting for, the Great and Famous Wandering Artist, Issun! Yes, yes, it really is me, line up one at a time, babes first! I always like to make time for my fa... what? No, down here. Down here. FARTHER DOWN. Okay, so you've clearly gotten a little confu... SAY THAT TO MY FACE. THAT'S RIGHT, COME DOWN HERE AND CALL ME A BUG. You won't act so big when I cut you down a few sizes with my trusty Denkomaru! C'mon! ... I AM NOT THE SPARKILTIS FAIRY EITHER. I don't even know what that is, but I know that I am 100%... no, 110% not a fairy in any way shape or size, you hear me? NEVER MIND THE SPARKLES. Okay, you are going down. Down like a thing that goes down. Wait, wait, wait, where are you going? Don't think running from me is going to help you escape from your fate!
....
Okay, where are you going, and more importantly, why can't you slow down a little? Stupid long legged speedy people.
Man, today has really been the worst day ever. First I lose Ammy, (Not my fault! Didn't I say, "Ammy, those guys are strangers. You really shouldn't take dog bones from strangers. No, not even if it's a Large bone! Don't give me those eyes! Look, they've got some kind of weird white boxy thing that just screams villain, and I don't trust... oh my god is that a first edition mint condition Busty Buddhist Babes Under Waterfalls Battling Bears And Rapidly Becoming Bare? You can't get one of these for love or mon...." wait, no. Um, that last part never happened. Moving right along!) and now I'm someplace completely weird and creepy, and let me tell you, I know from weird and creepy.
Oh and then, how could I forget? Those stupid squirrels! I mean, at first I think, fellow artists, we'll stick together, right? We even work with the same kinda subject matter! Well, I like to go a little more tasteful. The other stuff is all well and good, even, heh heh, necessary sometimes, but I like to think of what I do as true art, y'know? The female form in all its glories... it's just like it was meant to be immortalized! Many times. From a lot of angles. With lots of bouncy, bouncy models, all going "Issun, oh, Issun, how can you be so manly and so sensitive at the same time? The way you wield your sword... and your brush... oo-ooh, and your sword..."
Whoa, where was I? Oh, right, the squirrels. So yeah, I was thinking "Finally, something good happening." But NO. Those small-minded smelly upstart hack rodents had the nerve to turn their noses up at me! Saying stuff like "Oh, I didn't know it was amateur night tonight" and "If you're done with your fingerpainting, the grownups would perhaps like to have a turn," and going on and on and on.
So of course I whipped out my trusty Denkomaru, but then they just started making fun of THAT it is not itsy-bitsy-teeny-weeny-tiny but then there were at least five... ten... forty of them. And you know, I could have just taken them all out... but it's just tacky to show off like that right away. Yeah, sure, it's a classic move, the stranger coming into town and busting out his crazy moves against impossible odds, and sometimes I go in for it. But for the most part I like to stay low-key. Quiet. Humble. Unassuming. Yep, that's just the kind of guy I am. Now, can someone give me a lift, here?
Preferably any cute chicks! The more the merrier!
Poll Vote!
Character: Jack Spicer
Series: Xiaolin Showdown
Character Age: N/A (srsly, it doesn't say even on the official site), but he seems to look & act around his early teens. I'd say 15.
Canon: Jack Spicer had always wanted to rule the world since the second grade, and is currently partnered up with Wuya, an evil villainess reduced to a mere spirit, to collect the powerful weapons called "Shin Gong Wu". He is intelligent and a self-proclaimed genius, but his immaturity leads people to believe that he is incompetent and idiotic. Most of the time, he is a coward, screams like a girl, and is easily pushed around (even by his younger niece). Jack doesn't have any 'friends', but he is a total fanboy for his evil-idol, Chase Young.
Sample Post:
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
This dastardly plan of mine worked out better than I thought it would. Those stupid counselors don't know a destructive, killer-jackbot when they SEE ONE! HA HA HA! Luckily for me, I can make ANYTHING in the world, including size-reducing jet-packs, infra-red goggles, hover boots and an underground playground! HA, I'll be the star of this summer camp!
AND OH BOY, I LOVE CAMP! Even if I did have some ...awful memories of dirty toilet water around my ears, I got to eat hot dogs, and make s'mores around the camp fire, and make lanyards! Check out my Heli-bot... hey, where'd it go?! HOLY COW, I LEFT IT BACK HOME! ARGH, I hate it when that happens - stupid size-reducing jet pack, why'd ya hafta' shrink my belongings so so so... SO TINILY??? I confuses me! I WISH YOU WOULD JUST STO-
...
*ahem* ERGHHHH, WELL, I guess I can wow the other kids here with my other *COOL* inventions. My trusty JACKBOTS always do the trick! Unlike my past experiences with being the loser kid at camp, now I at least have gadgets to prove myself. HAHAHA, NO MORE WET WILLIES FOR ME, NO SIRRRRREE! They can't mess with Evil Boy Genius, Jack Spicer no more. I'll be all like:
"JACK BOTS! GIVE 'EM A SWIRLY THAT THEY'LL NEVER FORGET!" OR OR OR... "JACK BOTS! STEAL ALL THEIR UNDERWEAR AND HIKE IT UP THE FLAG POLE!"
I still haven't forgiven them for stealing my banana whities...
I'm SO going to looooove summer camp this year... -huh? Aw, my super cool Chase Young lunch box has a dent in it, again! *asdakmgl;gfds* MY DAY SUCKS!
Poll Vote!
Character: Rachel
Series: The Animorphs
Character Age: 14
Canon: In a stunning move of brilliance, a dying alien gave five young humans the power to shapeshift into an exact genetic duplicate of any creature, so that they could fight off a secret invasion of parasitic alien slugs known as Yeerks.
Tall, blond and fashionable, Rachel is a gymnast as well as an Animorph. She's the most reckless of the group, always willing to take the path of the frontal assault, usually leaping before she looks. She knows this, and it frightens her, but she refuses to let anyone else know.
Sample Post:
So you know how there are those times, when everything is going great, and you just want to jump for joy? Like maybe someone just turned you loose in the mall with an unlimited spending account, or that cute guy you've had your eye on for a few weeks has finally asked you out so you're in this land of pure bliss, where nothing can possibly go wrong...
Well, I can't decide if this is one of those times or not. I mean, on the one hand, I'm busy crashing through a stereotypical B-movie forest, playing "dodge the dead"-- if your definition of 'dodge' is 'flatten like a pancake'-- which may or may not be a new form of Controller. All of this just to check out a lake that might be an outdoor Yeerk Pool. That would be the bad hand. On the other hand, I'm crashing through a stereotypical B-movie forest, and I don't have to feel bad about flattening the Corpse-Controllers. At best, I'm killing an enemy, at worst, I'm killing something that's already dead. No big, right?
I'm pretty sure the rumors about this being a Yeerk Pool are wrong, anyways. Seriously, there's no protection, and I've squished god knows how many of these "Corpse-Controllers", and that is such a stupid name, they're zombies, but there's been no alarm. Not one little laser beam. I mean, geez. Even those slugs'll give their canon fodder a bit more weaponry than the arms of their squished companions.
And can I just say 'ew'? There's decay between my toes, and I think it's still moving. Oh god, I hope it's not still there when I morph out. Maybe I should do that now. A grizzly fits better in the woods than an elephant, anyways, and maybe it'll get some of these creeps to back off. Somehow I doubt that, but I'd really like to get this mission over with sooner rather than later. Jake so owes me a trip to the mall for this.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. C-closed!
Character Name: Portgas D. Ace
Series: One
Piece
Character Age: 20
Canon: : One Piece is a story about dreams, courage,
adventure, friendship, and most importantly, it's about a bunch of pirates
trying to find the legendary treasure - One Piece - to become the next
Pirate King. Monkey D. Luffy is one such pirate, and the story follows him
and his crew on this quest.
Ace is Luffy's older brother, who left home three years before Luffy did. He
is the commander of the Second Division of the Whitebeard Pirates, one of
the most most feared pirates in the whole Grand Line. His dream is to make
Whitebeard the Pirate King, as opposite to Luffy's dream of becoming the
Pirate King himself. In the series, he is searching for a pirate named
Blackbeard to avenge the death of another division leader in his crew.
An intelligent and polite individual, Ace shows good insight into situations
and can be very observant. He is full of confidence and is seen always with
a smirk/grin on his face. He is probably one of the most powerful Devil Fruit users on the
Grand Line, having eaten the "Mera Mera" Fruit, which gives him fire
manipulation abilities and his reputation as "Fire Fist Ace". He is narcoleptic, and is prone
to falling asleep on random occasions, especially when he's
eating.
Sample Post:
My most sincere apologies, ma'am. I was completely unaware of the fact that
I was standing on your... arm. And I'm terribly sorry for the dirt and
footprints, ma'am. Here, let me wipe it for you. Although, I must say,
these are some unique traits you people have on this island. Grey and
mustard-coloured skin, detachable limbs, this slow, shuffling way of walking
- as well as threatening strangers with chainsaws.
I can tell that you don't like pirates, but I'm just here to ask for
information, so if you'll please? My name's Ace, and I'm searching for a
man. Another pirate called Blackbeard. You might have heard of him.
Sorry, what? Brains? I take that means no? Well, then have you- No, ma'am,
please don't touch the hat.
I meant it. Don't touch the hat. And I wouldn't advise coming at me with
that chainsaw you have over there either. I told you, I'm just here to ask
for information, not to cause trouble-
Sorry, but I warned you.
....
.... Well, that was fruitful. This is becoming rather tiring. Apparently I
missed Blackbeard by three days at the last town I visited, and nobody knew
where he was headed. And this lady asked me whether I would like to find the
answers to all my questions. I said well depends, yes, if you can do that,
since that'll make my search much easier, and she gave me this pamphlet.
What did it say again? It was pretty funny... Now where did I put
that thing... Ah, here it is - Looking for something? Or simply
searching for answers? Then look no further! Camp Fuck You Die -
where you'll find the Answer to The Ultimate Question Of Life, the Universe
and Everything.
Definitely a strange way to advertise a place, but the co-ordinates were
nearby and I thought I could check it out. And this sure is a sober town - I
haven't seen a restaurant anywhere for the past five hours- Oh hey there!
The townsmen over there! Can one of you point me to the nearest restaurant?
I'm starving.
You want my name? Ace. And some people call me Fire Fist-
Well, no. I'm sorry, but I'm not the replacement oven you people were
waiting for. I'm just stopping by to try to find some answers-
....No, I'm not your new campfire either. Nor am I- what? Okay, so
yes, people call me "Fire Fist Ace", but geez, I am quite sure that I'm
not the Fire Fist you're looking for.
Again, I'm telling you. No.
....Do I look like a vibrator to you?
Poll Vote!
Character: Sarugaki Hiyori
Series: Bleach
Character Age: Unknown, but appears as a 10-14 years old girl
Canon: Once upon a time, a group of shinigami committed the ultimate taboo of acquiring hollow's power. Equipped with their zanpukuto and the newly-acquired ugly masks, they become better-stronger-faster and are now known as the vizards. Their backgrounds are unknown; their full powers are unknown; and their true motive, as you can guess by now, is also unknown. The only thing we did know about them is that they're a group of interesting people (ranging from gentle big guy to porn-loving girl), who help Ichigo with his training.
So, Hiyori is one of these mysterious masked warriors. She's grumpy, rude and hot-headed. If you ever see her around, she's probably doing one of the following: shouting, arguing, beating up Ichigo and fellow vizard, Hirako. However, her best insult is calling people "baldy"; and the verbal and physical abuses are signs of friendship, really. Anyway, even though Hiyori is a proud and confident tomboy, she does have one-to-two-pages of "human-and-shinigami-hate-us" emo and is capable of being frightened. Also, she slaps people with sandal.
Sample Post:
Alright you baldy, listen up! The next person who starts whinin' about how this place sucks? I'm gonna kill you! By pouring hot soup into your fuckin' brain though yer eye socket, yer ear canal and yer nose. Then crush your damn skull into billions pieces. And feed yer medium-rare brain to those friggin' zombies! Got it?
Really. All I can hear since I got here is complain, complain, and more friggin' complain. Well. I don't give a shit to your bitching. But it's fuckin' annoying. If ya really want to bitch about how yer life sucks? Fine. Just do it under the sea. I'm sure that those gay singing fish would make ya happy.
But. Guess what? Y'all baldy better stop complaining about this place. Look, whatever this place is... What? Camp Fuck You Die, huh? Real interesting name for a summer camp. I'm so envious of the Director's awesome naming skill. Too bad that this place can't live up to its name, though. I mean, look at the so-call site attraction here? Moanin' about braaaiiiiiiiins like a freakin' baby. Staggerin' like a three-legged tortoise. And completely fell apart after a little slap on its face. Even the Made-in-China zombies that can only hop like friggin' bunnies are scarier. Totally worthless piece of shit. Pathetic. Really. If ya want to create a camp that can fuck people up? At least make some goddamn effort in maintaining the zombies. If these living dead are the best ya got? Ha. Even the Data Center can fuck people up better.
Anyway, what I want to say is that y'all should stop whining. If yer miserable, just go to have some fun with those friggin' zombies. I mean, who wouldn't feel better after blowing shits up? Besides, there're some real interesting traditions here. Man, mass marriages every month, huh? That sounds fun. Look, one of the zombies even gave me an invitation to a wedding between Epuuscaballa and Homosapienio. And-- The hell? What do you mean by wanting me to be their freakin' Ring Bearer?! Are ya freakin' blind?! I'm not a goddamn little boy! If-- God-dammit! Yer rotting flesh just ruined my sandal!
Okay, this freakin' stupid place is making me mad and hungry. Baldy Ichigo, wherever you are, go make me a sandwiches, now.
Poll Vote!
Character: Bugs Bunny
Series: Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies
Character Age: Looks and acts like a perpetual teenager (counting from his debut in A Wild Hare, he'd be 67)
Canon: Once upon a time, when animation was still young, the staff at Warner Brothers explored the world of cartoons, making, stretching, and outright breaking the very rules that they created. Hey, just like CFUD! Then, some fateful day, Tex Avery took the small white rabbit that had appeared in other shorts and gave him a definitive personality...
Bugs typifies the "little guy" in most cartoons, content to being a mostly ordinary rabbit until some outside threat (Elmer Fudd, Marvin the Martian, Yosemeti Sam, and opera, just to name a few) threatens his idyllic way of life. Although he doesn't always proceed to declare war, he does almost always thwart his opponents with sight gags, physical humor, trickery, and crossdressing. As a Warner cartoon, Bugs also has the power of Meta--he often breaks the fourth wall by addressing the audience (back when cartoons were played in theatres, this even sometimes features a sillouette), making pop culture references, and tweaking the rules of cartoon logic to his favor.
Sample Post:
I just know that Daffy's laughing at me, wherever he is. Hah. Like his sense of direction's that much better.
You'd figure I'd get myself a GPS mapajiggy by now. Or at least a tag or something.
*sigh* The things a rabbit has to do for the sake of comedy, I suppose.
Ah, excuse me, mac, I was wondering--
Why, yes, I'm Bugs Bunny, rabbit extraordinare. I'll be glad to sign an autograph for you--
*is smoooooooched*
Wow. Whatasmacker!
Waitaminute. This wasn't in the script.
--Ahem. Please conduct yourself like a lady, ma'am. This place might be post Hayes Code, but I'm afraid I'm a bit too old fashioned to keep up with all these newfangled ideas. Why, in my day, I had to walk up the hill! Both ways! Barefoot! In the snow!
Now, then, where was I? Oh, yes, directions. Maybe if I take a few more steps towards camera right...aha!
Uh...
"Rabbit Duck Zombie Season"?
"Destroying Your Childhood Memories Since 2005"?
...
"We Look Better Innadress"?!?
Of course you realize this means war.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kieran Trevarde
Series: The God Eaters by Jesse Hajicek
Character Age: 19
Canon:A mixture of Sci fi, Fantasy, Western and Prison Romance the God Eaters is a unique book and that requires unique characters. Thankfully Kieran Trevard fits the bill. An outlaw on the run for most of his life, Kieran knows how to survive. This proves useful when the authorities finally catch up with him and dump him into Churchrock, the darkest hole of a prison in the country. It's there that he meets Ashleigh Trine, a shy northern revolutionist, who agrees to join up with him and plan an escape. Together these two outcasts discover true freedom and find themselves major players in a battle between the gods.
Kieran is described as having a "razor-blades-in-candy" voice and a strong Iavaian drawl that thickens when he's at his deadliest. He's a sarcastic SOB with the stubbornness of a mule and enough cynicism to make an ancient god doubt himself. Ashleigh has managed to domesticate Kieran a bit (He doesn't kill as many people anymore?) but there ain't nothing that can completely fix this boy. Kieran's a dirty low down bastard with more than a few issues, but he does everyone a favor and doesn't let them get him down~
Sample Post:
Alright, waking up in the middle of nowhere? That I expected. The dead animated corpse spooning with me? Not so much. Now I can tell this place is..."special" in that cruel and unusual kind of way and something, oh let’s say the crazy magical barrier, tells me that leaving right this moment ain’t exactly encouraged.
So I figure, it might be best to get all the cards out on the table. Name's Kieran Trevarde. I ain't here to cause trouble. Hell, I don't even know how I got here. All I wanna do is find my partner and go. Whatever business y'all might have with the friendly critter in the lake or those funny little birds just ain't none of my concern.
I will admit that a tree sporting lacy panties and bras caught my attention, but you know what? I'm more than willing to ignore it and move on with my life. So if anyone or anything that isn't rotting, crazy, perverted or just plain weird could show the way out of this place, it'd be greatly appreciated.
Camp Fuck You Die? Director? Eternal torture and humiliation?
No see, I'm afraid you didn't quite understand. I've done my time, or part of it at least, and as nice as it is to have vines that welcome new comers with and without the assistance of soap, I just ain't interested. So unless you've seen a nearsighted red-head walking around recently I'm going to have to insist on knowing the way out. And just in case the singing metal screen is any sort of indication of the attitude here, let’s get one thing straight.
No one is riding this cowboy.
Poll Vote!
Character: Waya Yoshitaka
Series: Hikaru no Go
Age: 15
Canon: Hikaru no Go is a series about Go which involves a wide variety of characters. The main character, Shindou Hikaru, finds a haunted Go board and gets drawn in to the world of Go by the ghost named Sai. After meeting Touya Akira and assigning him as a personal rival, Hikaru sets out to improve his own Go abilities.
Waya Yoshitaka is an insei (a student of the Japanese Go Institute) who is in the process of trying to become a professional Go player. Besides playing, studying, and breathing Go, Waya also enjoys playing internet Go every now and then. He's rather quick to make friends, though he's very loyal to them.
Sample Post:
Alright. I'm down a DS, a pair of headphones, and some dental floss, but they were mostly necessary losses. I've still got my backpack, clothes, hairbrush, toothpaste, and my magnetic Go set. My tooth brush has gone missing. I've also got a cell phone, but there's no service anywhere. So, it's only good for throwing, really.
I had thought that my greatest worry at this godforsaken place would be finding someone who'd be willing to play Go. Then I discovered the ravenous trees of evil, scary half-dead-looking people aside. I'll never let them get away with eating my Gameboy. That was my Legend of Zelda game! I'm never making the mistake of underestimating a camp again.
Note to self: find duct tape and rope very, very fast. Lots of rope...
And I'm supposed to send postcards to Shindou or something. On the other hand, I could send Touya a souvenir. I wonder if you can keep severed branches alive long enough to arrive by package...
Poll Vote!
Character: Issun
Series: Okami
Character Age: Not listed anywhere I can find it. D: Longer-living than humans, but he looks like this, and acts pretty young.
Canon: Issun is from the PS2 game Okami. The main character is the sun goddess Amaterasu, nicknamed in the game Ammy, who is also a wolf. Although going by canon it's probably a lot more accurate to describe her as a doggie. She goes on world saving adventures with her trusty sidekick, Issun! Issun's basically like Navi only with an abundance of testosterone. And a personality. And a story line.
Issun is a member of the Poncle race, which means he is like one inch high and glows and sparkles and wears a large bug-shaped hat. Therefore for most of the game he looks like a little glowing bug, but he is actually person-shaped, and has issues with being called a bug. He has a sword/brush named Denkomaru which he will use to threaten people in tiny fits of machismo and/or paint things with. He does regular-type art as well as some Brush Techniques, a game mechanic that basically boils down to Combat/Puzzlesolving Calligraphy.
He is also a big perv - he will reliably and unsubtly hit on every female ever. He'll protest and bluster loudly about any perceived threats or insults to himself. He also likes to crack wise about the situations and people that you meet.
His heart is in the right place, though; not-so-secretly, he's a big softie. He's pretty brave, too. While he doesn't like the idea of facing imminent and terrible danger, and he'll protest, he'll give in easily enough. And then he'll be the one egging you on the loudest, or jumping first into the fray himself. Despite what he says at other times, if he's faced directly with danger or the unknown, his motto is to go ahead and jump in before thinking.
Sample Post:
Ahem ahem! It's me, the one you've all been waiting for, the Great and Famous Wandering Artist, Issun! Yes, yes, it really is me, line up one at a time, babes first! I always like to make time for my fa... what? No, down here. Down here. FARTHER DOWN. Okay, so you've clearly gotten a little confu... SAY THAT TO MY FACE. THAT'S RIGHT, COME DOWN HERE AND CALL ME A BUG. You won't act so big when I cut you down a few sizes with my trusty Denkomaru! C'mon! ... I AM NOT THE SPARKILTIS FAIRY EITHER. I don't even know what that is, but I know that I am 100%... no, 110% not a fairy in any way shape or size, you hear me? NEVER MIND THE SPARKLES. Okay, you are going down. Down like a thing that goes down. Wait, wait, wait, where are you going? Don't think running from me is going to help you escape from your fate!
....
Okay, where are you going, and more importantly, why can't you slow down a little? Stupid long legged speedy people.
Man, today has really been the worst day ever. First I lose Ammy, (Not my fault! Didn't I say, "Ammy, those guys are strangers. You really shouldn't take dog bones from strangers. No, not even if it's a Large bone! Don't give me those eyes! Look, they've got some kind of weird white boxy thing that just screams villain, and I don't trust... oh my god is that a first edition mint condition Busty Buddhist Babes Under Waterfalls Battling Bears And Rapidly Becoming Bare? You can't get one of these for love or mon...." wait, no. Um, that last part never happened. Moving right along!) and now I'm someplace completely weird and creepy, and let me tell you, I know from weird and creepy.
Oh and then, how could I forget? Those stupid squirrels! I mean, at first I think, fellow artists, we'll stick together, right? We even work with the same kinda subject matter! Well, I like to go a little more tasteful. The other stuff is all well and good, even, heh heh, necessary sometimes, but I like to think of what I do as true art, y'know? The female form in all its glories... it's just like it was meant to be immortalized! Many times. From a lot of angles. With lots of bouncy, bouncy models, all going "Issun, oh, Issun, how can you be so manly and so sensitive at the same time? The way you wield your sword... and your brush... oo-ooh, and your sword..."
Whoa, where was I? Oh, right, the squirrels. So yeah, I was thinking "Finally, something good happening." But NO. Those small-minded smelly upstart hack rodents had the nerve to turn their noses up at me! Saying stuff like "Oh, I didn't know it was amateur night tonight" and "If you're done with your fingerpainting, the grownups would perhaps like to have a turn," and going on and on and on.
So of course I whipped out my trusty Denkomaru, but then they just started making fun of THAT it is not itsy-bitsy-teeny-weeny-tiny but then there were at least five... ten... forty of them. And you know, I could have just taken them all out... but it's just tacky to show off like that right away. Yeah, sure, it's a classic move, the stranger coming into town and busting out his crazy moves against impossible odds, and sometimes I go in for it. But for the most part I like to stay low-key. Quiet. Humble. Unassuming. Yep, that's just the kind of guy I am. Now, can someone give me a lift, here?
Preferably any cute chicks! The more the merrier!
Poll Vote!
Character: Jack Spicer
Series: Xiaolin Showdown
Character Age: N/A (srsly, it doesn't say even on the official site), but he seems to look & act around his early teens. I'd say 15.
Canon: Jack Spicer had always wanted to rule the world since the second grade, and is currently partnered up with Wuya, an evil villainess reduced to a mere spirit, to collect the powerful weapons called "Shin Gong Wu". He is intelligent and a self-proclaimed genius, but his immaturity leads people to believe that he is incompetent and idiotic. Most of the time, he is a coward, screams like a girl, and is easily pushed around (even by his younger niece). Jack doesn't have any 'friends', but he is a total fanboy for his evil-idol, Chase Young.
Sample Post:
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
This dastardly plan of mine worked out better than I thought it would. Those stupid counselors don't know a destructive, killer-jackbot when they SEE ONE! HA HA HA! Luckily for me, I can make ANYTHING in the world, including size-reducing jet-packs, infra-red goggles, hover boots and an underground playground! HA, I'll be the star of this summer camp!
AND OH BOY, I LOVE CAMP! Even if I did have some ...awful memories of dirty toilet water around my ears, I got to eat hot dogs, and make s'mores around the camp fire, and make lanyards! Check out my Heli-bot... hey, where'd it go?! HOLY COW, I LEFT IT BACK HOME! ARGH, I hate it when that happens - stupid size-reducing jet pack, why'd ya hafta' shrink my belongings so so so... SO TINILY??? I confuses me! I WISH YOU WOULD JUST STO-
...
*ahem* ERGHHHH, WELL, I guess I can wow the other kids here with my other *COOL* inventions. My trusty JACKBOTS always do the trick! Unlike my past experiences with being the loser kid at camp, now I at least have gadgets to prove myself. HAHAHA, NO MORE WET WILLIES FOR ME, NO SIRRRRREE! They can't mess with Evil Boy Genius, Jack Spicer no more. I'll be all like:
"JACK BOTS! GIVE 'EM A SWIRLY THAT THEY'LL NEVER FORGET!" OR OR OR... "JACK BOTS! STEAL ALL THEIR UNDERWEAR AND HIKE IT UP THE FLAG POLE!"
I still haven't forgiven them for stealing my banana whities...
I'm SO going to looooove summer camp this year... -huh? Aw, my super cool Chase Young lunch box has a dent in it, again! *asdakmgl;gfds* MY DAY SUCKS!
Poll Vote!
Character: Rachel
Series: The Animorphs
Character Age: 14
Canon: In a stunning move of brilliance, a dying alien gave five young humans the power to shapeshift into an exact genetic duplicate of any creature, so that they could fight off a secret invasion of parasitic alien slugs known as Yeerks.
Tall, blond and fashionable, Rachel is a gymnast as well as an Animorph. She's the most reckless of the group, always willing to take the path of the frontal assault, usually leaping before she looks. She knows this, and it frightens her, but she refuses to let anyone else know.
Sample Post:
So you know how there are those times, when everything is going great, and you just want to jump for joy? Like maybe someone just turned you loose in the mall with an unlimited spending account, or that cute guy you've had your eye on for a few weeks has finally asked you out so you're in this land of pure bliss, where nothing can possibly go wrong...
Well, I can't decide if this is one of those times or not. I mean, on the one hand, I'm busy crashing through a stereotypical B-movie forest, playing "dodge the dead"-- if your definition of 'dodge' is 'flatten like a pancake'-- which may or may not be a new form of Controller. All of this just to check out a lake that might be an outdoor Yeerk Pool. That would be the bad hand. On the other hand, I'm crashing through a stereotypical B-movie forest, and I don't have to feel bad about flattening the Corpse-Controllers. At best, I'm killing an enemy, at worst, I'm killing something that's already dead. No big, right?
I'm pretty sure the rumors about this being a Yeerk Pool are wrong, anyways. Seriously, there's no protection, and I've squished god knows how many of these "Corpse-Controllers", and that is such a stupid name, they're zombies, but there's been no alarm. Not one little laser beam. I mean, geez. Even those slugs'll give their canon fodder a bit more weaponry than the arms of their squished companions.
And can I just say 'ew'? There's decay between my toes, and I think it's still moving. Oh god, I hope it's not still there when I morph out. Maybe I should do that now. A grizzly fits better in the woods than an elephant, anyways, and maybe it'll get some of these creeps to back off. Somehow I doubt that, but I'd really like to get this mission over with sooner rather than later. Jake so owes me a trip to the mall for this.
Poll Vote!