(Untitled)

[recurrence]

Next batch! As a note, the batches close after fifty or so votes come in. Please be patient! There's no weeding this round.

Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!

Now VOTE. Closed!

Comments

Re: Setsuna apper

[classprotector]

I did change for an in because it wasn't a bad app, and I hate seeing people that borderline not get in, but, ah, not much of a difference, I'm afraid.

As for why I initially voted out, the voice wasn't as strong as I would've liked--I didn't really hear the character speaking to me, but it wasn't bad. And I'm not sure how to suggest an improvement. There was also a lot of canon reliance in the second paragraph, or at least it felt that way. Directly referencing where the character is in canon in the app usually doesn't work well; it takes up space, confuses people who don't know the canon, and also, well, doesn't matter that much. In camp, yeah, that's going to come up, but in the application, focusing more on humor than direct references to what's happening now in the story is usually a better call. Also, as someone whose only knowledge of Angel Sanctuary comes from the OVA many years ago, the punchline (scary when she's pissed) really made me feel like I was missing some canon thing about his sister. I have no idea if I was, but it felt like that. While I recognize it would be OOC to not talk about Sara, I think minimizing the references to her, as well as the angel/demon name dropping and try to get more Setsuna in there, which might help emphasize the voice.

Hope that helps!

Re: Setsuna apper

[classprotector]

Yeah I'll try to hold back on the canon more next time. It was something I was wibbling over and kept trimming. About the angel/demon name-dropping, I was worried about the Lucifer and God thing but it was intended to be your more generic Lucifer and God. I'll think of some cleverer next time. Thanks for the tips.

Re: Setsuna apper

[classprotector]

I think the thing wtih the Lucifer and God thing was mainly that the first paragraph already had some of that kind of humor, so it seemed like a lot, even though it wasn't that much. It's just kinda a weird repetition thing.