(no subject)
Only a couple more rounds after this! \o/
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. CLOSED.
Character: Mylene Jenius
Series: Macross 7
Character Age: 17 (Macross 7 OVAs)
Canon: When you're faced with an unknown, unrelenting, incredibly strong enemy who seems to shrug off conventional weaponry, what's the reasonable thing to do? Sing to them, of course! And that's just what Nekki Basara strives to do. After the Protodevlin encounters the Macross 7 fleet, the military tries their best to fight them off with missles, reaction weaponry, and giant mecha called Valkyries. Meanwhile, Basara hops in his own special modified Valkyrie to show them that it takes just one song of rock and roll to move the universe. Along with his band, Fire Bomber, Basara sings to the galaxy, the Protodevlin, and the people of Macross 7.
Mylene Jenius is the newest and youngest member of Fire Bomber. Growing up rebellious in the shadows of her two famous parents, Max and Miria Jenius, she's fiery, spunky, and strives to prove herself to both her parents and the members of the band. A very talented bassist and vocalist in her own right, Mylene starts out as the backup singer for the small concerts Fire Bomber throws to their loyal fans. As the series goes on, she begins to mature into a young lady who understands that singing can be more powerful than violence, and puts her life on the line to let Fire Bomber's song be heard. Even though her heart is divided on choosing between Basara, or the military fighter pilot Gamlin, Mylene thinks first and foremost of her friends, her family, and everyone she wants to protect.
Sample Post:
Let's get started, it's Saturday night! ♪ How're you guys doing?
Alright everybody, are you ready for Fire Bomber's first concert at Camp Fu-fu-- Camp? We're here to play and spread our song across the universe, spanning worlds, galaxies, and the glowing lake! Do you feel the beat? The beat that Fire Bomber is all about? We're proud to represent Macross 7 on this faraway summer camp planet, and..
... even though we can't all be here, I'll sing with all I've got. Thankfully, while I was setting up for the concert, I found this nice old-fashioned laptop to play the rest of the music and I bet once we get started, we'll all be able to sing loud enough to make up for it. It takes just one song to understand the words, though if you don't understand it on the first try, just try again and try again. You might have trouble singing along with your lack of teeth, or ears, o-or jaw, if you just sing with your heart and soul, it'll get through. Just listen to our song! ... that's what he would say, isn't it?
Although... I don't think Mama was operating on the same page when she gave us this gig. When she said summer camp, she described it as exotic views, lush green scenery and charming locals with unique tastes. I've definitely seen the unique tastes! Using brains as your appetizer, main course, and dessert? That sounds so gross! I can't believe anyone would eat it but... but if it's what you like, Mr. Zombie, Fire Bomber will sing through your meal. And I bet it'll make your brains taste even... brainier!
I hoped that when she meant "exotic views' she meant a romantic beach in the sunset, or a wild jungle with incredible and beautiful creatures. I see the incredible creatures, but I don't know if I would call them beautiful. Interesting, sure. Kind of weird, sure. But-- I don't remember hearing about any big gorillas with purple fur. Purple's a nice color, but it clashes too much to be really useful, right? And I've seen telepathic rodents before but toucans? Really? Earth really is full of amazing things! But the most amazing thing of all was the beautiful zombie and ape mix. I didn't think that their child would look like that because neither apes nor zombies really resemble lizards, but with that shade of purple and that shade of green, it has to be! With "I love you, you love me", he's spreading the word of peace.
Singing about family, singing about friends... Mama was right. Everything is so beautiful and green, from the highest trees, to the native people, to the glowing lake with Ms. Marcy inside! I've never seen anything so pretty. I almost wish we could stay here forever, but... the universe is calling for us. I've got people I need to find, we all do! People at home and in the outer reaches of the galaxy, right? And I know our song tonight will reach every single one of them. This is what he would do, so... let's sing with all we've got, no more wasting time!
Camp, Mr. Barney, Ms. Marcy, sing with us tonight. Let's go everyone, Holy Lonely Night! ♪ Hurry up and believe in yourself!
Poll Vote!
Character: Zoe
Series: Old Man’s War, specifically Zoe’s Tale
Character Age: 17
Canon: Spoilers for The Ghost Brigade throughout canon Humanity has reached the stars, and found them full of xenophobic, aggressive aliens who want the same territory humans do and find human flesh tasty. So of course, the logical thing is for a bunch of xenophobic, aggressive assholes to rule the human race and thoroughly antagonize all the other species in their arm of the galaxy. Right? Well, both of Zoe’s fathers (her biological and adoptive) have seen the flaw in that particular argument, and are doing their best to stop it. Admittedly her biological father did so by making a deal with an alien race, the Obin, that he would provide them consciousnessness, for which they loved him and worshipped him enough that they agreed to destroy almost all of humanity. Fortunately he died before that plan went into effect and after the consciousness thing was underway, so their worship passed onto his daughter.
For someone whose spent her life being worshipped, watched, and protected (sometimes forcibly) by an entire alien species, and who was orphaned at the age of 8, she’s a remarkably normal teenage girl. She has loving adoptive parents, a best friend with whom she can giggle and crush the egos of teenage boys with remarkable ease, a boyfriend - she’s as normal as she can possibly be with two large and scary aliens following her around constantly, as a semi-deliberate buffer against the Obin’s efforts to turn her into an icon. She’s brave, occasionally immature, extremely sarcastic, sometimes kind of bitchy, and generally does her best to be worthy of being for virtually worshipped by an entire alien species. Some days it works better than others.
Sample Post: This place smells like armpit. Take it from me, I know stink. I am an unfortunate, long-suffering connoisseur of stink. And this place smells of Eau de Armpit, with just a little stinky gym socks parfum, with just a hint of rotting - Did that gorilla just fart at me? Eeeew.
What with the wildlife here, anyway? I mean, okay, I’m glad I haven’t encountered any people-eating werewolves. Don’t get me wrong! I could spend the rest of my life quite happily not dealing with people eating werewolves, especially around idiot teenage boys who think that hunting werewolves is a smart idea. You’d think that the fact that all the girls I know would be more likely to smack them and call them idiots with extreme sarcasm than go “Oh! You’re so strong and manly! Take me!” would provide a slight hint that that may not be the smartest thing, but nooo. Of course not! I swear, testosterone and IQ are not only inversely related, but the inverse gets higher with every ounce of teenagerhood.
I kind of like the gorillas here, though. Okay, they’re not the Earth standard gorillas you’d see in the zoo. But I think the purple really adds a certain something, you know? Add some lace and a few ribbons and you’d have the prettiest princess gorilla, thus making the endless King Kong remakes infinitely more interesting. Would Prettiest Princess Kong start kidnapping pretty boys instead?
But those animals look like people. Okay, rotting people. With bits falling off. And they’re contributing noticeably to the smell. I’d bet anything that whoever lives here calls them zombies. Or whatever the local equivalent is. Look, their call even sounds kind of like brains! Brains to you too, buddy!
So this means that, logically, the next weird alien animal I encounter should be a vampire. I’m going to hope that means mosquito rather than anything bigger. Especially with disturbing sexual overtones. Admittedly, the odds of a alien having any interest in sex with a human are surprisingly low, for most the people who’re desperately hoping otherwise. I mean, let’s face it. Yeah, there’s a few weirdoes out there in virtually any race who think having sex with humans is awesome and transgressive and hot, but for the most part, aliens are about as interested in having sex with some fleshy bipedal alien with weird sex organs as we are with having sex with some weird al-
....
What is that tentacled alien in the lake doing?
Poll Vote!
Character: Penelo
Series: Final Fantasy XII
Character Age: 17
Canon: Final Fantasy XII is a tale of politics, ruminations on history, and the ability of Man to shape his own destiny. All very heady subjects for two naive street kids get swept up in the midst of it after their kingdom is conquered by the neighboring empire. They travel the length and breadth of the land, and even into the sky, to assist their renegade princess in her quest to attain the power to reclaim her kingdom and stop the empire from engaging in yet more war.
Penelo is the lifelong friend of the (ostensibly) main character, Vaan. While he dreams of flying high as a Sky Pirate, Penelo keeps her feet firmly on the ground, running errands and taking odd jobs to make ends meet. She's quick to tease Vaan, and certainly tries to keep him out of trouble, although that's often a futile effort. She's a talented and graceful dancer, something that's evident in the way she fights; it becomes her default job class inthe games that follow. While she is normally prudent, Penelo is mindful of other's sensitivities and will be the first to come to a person's side when they are hurt or unwell. And although her sweet, polite, and compassionate nature has all the makings of a kind-hearted “Jesus” type, Penelo is really just the girl next door (who can probably kick your ass with a pirouette).
Sample Post:
This has to be the first village I've been to where they put their underwear out to dry on the trees. And they just let monsters roam around freely! No wonder the job posting for a dance instructor was under the Mark Hunts. I hope that doesn't mean that I'm the mark! Now it said that I would recognize my students by the red “V”s on their foreheads, and they would find me if I put one on mine. When they talk about “odd jobs” I don't think they meant it so literally... but someone has to put food on the table. Weirdness or no weirdness, it's time to get going! No matter what, I'll get the job done!
Hello, my name is Penelo, and I'll be your temporary dance instructor. Are you all the “Camp Funtime Undulation Dancers?” I see we all have our Vs on...Ew. Please don't lick your neighbor's V, okay? It's really nice to meet everybody, and I'm sure we'll have a lot of fun dancing! Oh...!! Is this too early in the morning for everybody? You all look so pale... and you're moaning! Omigosh, are you guys sick? Is there anything I can do? I know how to do healing magic, too. I'm not just a dancer. And I've gotten pretty good at white magic, I think. Don't just shake your heads at me like that! Being sick is serious business! How would your families feel if you went and died on them because you didn't take care of yourselves? At least promise me you guys will see a doctor after we're through today, okay?
But if you're sure that you're okay, we'll start our lesson. Your “Director” gave me a dance that she wanted me to teach you. This will be my first time with this dance, too. But I'm sure we can get through it together, even if it is pretty weird! Dance is something that comes naturally if you're trying to express yourself, I think. Keep that in mind when you're doing your warm-ups. And while you're doing that, I'm going to go over this one more time. Remember not to push yourselves too hard! I don't want you getting any sicker than you already are.
Let's see what's written here....Okay. So it's just a jump to the left...then a step to the right...put your hands on your hips, you bring your knees in tight...but it's the-HEY! What kind of dancer do they think I am!? These dancers may be under the weather, but whoever came up with this is a real sicko!
Change of plans: let's try doing this my way instead. All of you please get in a line. It's okay, please take your time! I know you guys aren't feeling very good. But mind your posture, and don't drag your knuckles on the ground! That's much better, but we all want to keep our knees a little bent so we can be nice and loose for this move. But don't get too loose! We wouldn't want anybody to get so loose that they lose their leg or something! Oh I'm just kidding, of course. Don't look so worried! This move looks pretty difficult, but it's actually pretty easy. Just hold your arms out like so, spin on the ball of your left foot, and kick your right leg out. That should be pretty simple to understand, but why don't I demonstrate for you now? Here I go!
Aaah! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to kick y-w-where's your head? D-did I just kick your head off?! This can't be happening! When they asked me if I had "killer dance moves" this isn't what I meant when I said yes!
Poll Vote!
Name: Vaan
Series: Final Fantasy XII
Age: 17
Canon: A backdrop of political conspiracy, the overthrow of government, the murder of kings: this is the scene in which FFXII takes place. With a nation ever at civil war, an unlikely alliance is formed between a small group of pirates (both famous and aspiring), a princess thought to have been dead, and a man whose betrayal to the crown is not quite what it seems. From haunted jungles to mysterious villages to the top of snow-capped peaks, this band of outlaws travels across the continent, fighting dangerous monsters and experiencing some of the most amazing phenomena any one of them has ever seen.
One of the members of this unlikely band of heroes is Vaan, a thief-turned-sky pirate. Vaan, one of the youngest of the team, maintains some of the group's much-needed curiosity. With an unrivaled thirst for adventure, Vaan's recklessness and energy has a way of grating on peoples' nerves, but he manages to remain optimistic (most of the time). Vaan's ability to get both himself and the party in trouble is sometimes an uncanny skill, one he has been slowly working on fixing. Luckily for him and everyone else involved, he manages to scrape by with a little help from his friends, particularly Penelo, his childhood companion and partner in piracy. While he may not be the most knowledgeable or cunning member of the group, Vaan is frequently the one coming up with the ideas that are just so outlandish that somehow, despite all reason and logic, they work. He can be a little cocky and carefree sometimes, especially when it comes to his dream of becoming a sky pirate, which he has aspired to for most of his life.
Note: In FFXII, one of the most prominent side quests involves hunting "marks," or monsters that go around causing trouble in various parts of the world. Your team can find different marks to hunt throughout the game.
Sample Post:
Know what? I could get used to this. I mean, yeah, this isn't the most luxurious place I've been to, but it's definitely not the worst. Sure, there are lots of zombies and monsters lurking around, but they're easy kills for me. Couple hits and they go down easy. And if they start getting to be trouble for you guys, I'm always up for hire. I'll make sure the only threat they pose is dropping bad loot, ha! Speaking of which, you'll never guess what I got from those zombies near the entrance -- twenty five pairs of pantyhose! No, I swear. Isn't that weird? Not that it's necessarily bad loot, I mean I'm sure they'll sell for a good price, but. Doesn't that seem like way too much pantyhose for some dead guys who've lost half their abdomens to be carrying? I mean, come on. What are they going to do with them, wear them on their heads? Is that zombie fashion or something?
I'm trying not to think about it too hard. Let's move on. What was I saying before... Oh yeah. I'm getting used to this place. Underwear-obsessed-zombies aside, it is so cool here. No, really! I've never seen anything like this place before -- well, okay, that's not entirely true. Woods filled with zombies and big hairy monsters I'm definitely familiar with. The smell is a new one, though. And the birds that keep staring at me like there's something on my face. And the glowing lake. And okay, maybe I've never seen a monster that particular shade of purple, but don't think for a second that I'm going to let any of that intimidate me! Far as I'm concerned, it just adds to the mystery of the whole place. I love stuff like that. Rare treasure, legendary monsters, some secret creature race that's been dead for thousands of years, technology from another world... I don't know what kinda stuff I'm going to find here. It could be anything! Pantyhose might be just the beginning. ... You know, they are pretty silky, if you try them on. Not that I have, but I imagine they would be. Heck, they could be, like. Magical pantyhose of the Ancient Gods of Siefud or something. THAT WOULD BE SO COOL. -- Hey! Don't laugh, it could totally happen! Stranger things have, right?
Anyway, I should go check this place out soon. That treasure's not going to scavenge itself, am I right? First things first, though; I have one little thing I need to do before I go anywhere. See, I signed up for a mark before I came down, so I should probably take care of her first. Level 7, name of Marcy, lives in the glowing water. Easy to find, right? I'll just fish around this lake for a while, and once she comes out, we'll be in business. Man, I can't wait to see what she looks like. I wonder if she likes pantyhose. You'd better stay back, though, for your own safety. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine; I've taken down bigger baddies than a tentacle demon. Hey, don't look so scared. Really, it's okay. You can calm down! I said I'll be fine!
... she's behind me, isn't she. Figures. Okay! That's! Okay, Vaan, you can do this. Just turn around, nice and slow, don't make any sudden movements, and --
... oh, now that is wicked cool. We are totally in business now.
Poll Vote!
Character: Richard "Richie" Osgood Foley [Alias as "Gear"]
Series: Static Shock
Character Age: 17
Canon: When a perfectly normal day was rent apart by an explosion known as the Big Bang, many ordinary students were gifted with unnatural powers- eventually given the nickname of Bang Babies. Becoming an intelligence-boosted member of this group himself despite not being present at the actual event (the theory was contamination from someone who was there), Richie's hobbies consist of everything from reading comic books to saving the planet alongside his best friend, Virgil Hawkins- better known as Static.
Possessing a cyborg of a backpack, along with various other gadgets, contraptions, and, well, gear designed by none other than himself, Richie makes juggling homework with an after school job look easy. He can be prone to overreacting at times and is probably one of the most terrible liars on the face of the planet, so it can be hard to believe that he's actually brilliant. The constant joking around doesn't help much either, nor does his tendency to let his thoughts wander out on a tangent. Thought you were talking about atoms? Try the displacement theory instead. Although he isn't anything special aside from that, friendship and loyalty are still two traits easily attributed to him. Past issues involving his father's racism bothered him for a while, yet Richie didn't falter in staying true to his friendship. He comes across as your typical teenage slacker, sure, but don't let that fool you in the least. Those machines didn't build themselves, after all.
Sample Post: Okay, alright, on the count of three, two, one-- Ow!! Projectile body limbs. There's a new one. Maybe I'll start an arm collection. Meaning, note to self: The whole innocent maiden in distress thing? So overrated. Now, back! Back, you... you... zombies... Zombies. Riiiight. You know what, that math homework is starting to look great right about now. Less facing off against legions of the undead, and more of those good old fashioned fractions. One more shot, just one more shot here! Ready backpack?
On the count of three again. One, two-- Fail? I didn't even do anything! I didn't ask for a personalized toucan narration either, actually. But... Wait. How does that even work? The next time someone decides to narrate for me, can we screen out the ones that think it's funny to bombard me with lame internet jokes? Please? Ugh, nevermind. I'll just try and ignore them. Somehow. So, ignoring, ignoring-- come ooon, think Richie, think! We've got one poor unsuspecting victim being mercilessly threatened by what appears to be an army of your typical brain-seeking zombies. If I can distract them long enough to get this "Marcy" lady away, I might not have to fight 'em. Guess that means I should... I guess I should...
Enough, enough! I can't concentrate! Will you shut up about going an hero! Do you even realize how much grammar you've just shattered? Look, I'll be glad to discuss it with you and your toucan buddies after, but right now I'm kiiind of busy. No, seriously. What does it take to get a good play by play these days? My reputation is crying. Crying, and writhing in a thousand different kinds of pain. Who's failing now, huh? Not me! Unless they said 'flailing'... Dude, I give up. Ten bucks and a week's worth of comics says that this'll start making sense the day the definition of sense is completely reversed, turned inside out, and run through a blender. Ten buck's also says I'm going to need major therapy once this is done. Probably accompanied by a thesaurus. A really, really big thesaurus. One that can fully attest to me that none of what you've been saying has any known synonyms.
Orrr maybe I'll just ask this Marcy, wherever she is. Hey, Marcy? Marcy, you around? This is the spot they said she'd be, wasn't it? Don't think I could've heard wrong. Kinda funny, though, since there hasn't been anything around here except for that giant tentacle thing in the lake. Talk about your greater than average sushi. Is it... looking at me? No, whoa, wait-- put me down, put me down!
Poll Vote!
Character: Flonne
Series: Disgaea: Hour of Darkness and Disgaea 2: Cursed Memories
Age: 1512 (Looks like a young 15 year-old)
Canon: In the power struggle for the throne in Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, Flonne finds herself acting out the role of the cute, clueless assassin angel-in-training sent to kill King Krichevskoy, unaware that King Krichevskoy was in fact already dead. Feeling sorry instead, Flonne leaves herself open to the attack of a wicked angel attempting to put her out of commission permanently, only to have Prince Laharl, the son of the late Overlord foil his plans and reclaim the item she needs to survive. For the sake of proving that demons can love, Flonne promises to help Laharl, Etna and the prince's other vassals reclaim the throne from the other, lesser demons clamoring to steal it before Laharl can make his rightful claim as the Netherworld's next Overlord.
Flonne is on all accounts a perky, happy and loving person and becoming a gFallen Angel h doesn't affect that in the slightest. She usually isn't easy to irritate, although she has a few touchy subjects such as love and her flat chest. Her goal is to spread love and make everyone, even demons, realize their potential to love, no matter their race. She is enamored by heroes of all kinds, from the likes of the Prism Rangers to heroes like Captain Gordon and his crew. Thus, Flonne also enjoys being a fan girl and an otaku at times.
Sample Post:
My fellow campers, please listen up! I have something very important to say today...
I'm a bit startled by everyone's behavior here at camp! Where is the love?! Those stuffed animals seem to love each other more than you do! I know I've only been here for a short amount of time, but I've already seen enough. This is supposed to be a fun, happy place! I mean, isn't that what the definition of camp is? Even the zombies around here seem to be nicer than some of you people. I think you really need to learn a thing or two about loving your fellow campers... and the zombies! Chopping them up just because they scare you is NOT okay. And who's idea was it to ban Hitler?! That's discrimination! I'll bet you hurt his feelings by saying he wasn't allowed in on your fun! So now that it's come to my attention, it's my duty to set things right and bring some love back into your lives. In fact, you'll love me for it!
So welcome to LOVE 101, class! I'll be your teacher from now on, so every day for two hours before lunch in the Mess Hall, you'll have class here with me, Fallen Angel Flonne! I'm fully certified to teach LOVE 101, so don't worry! You're in good hands! Lesson one: Everyone has some good in them! There's no use hiding that smile! It feels good to help people, doesn't it? I mean, everyone has a sense of justice! Justice... you know: the good in good and evil, the right in right and wrong... justice and love go hand in hand! Justice is the heroes who defend the innocent; the ones who fight with the power of love and righteousness! No wonder you're so mean! None of you have found the proper role models yet! I know! You should go out there and find at least one hero that you can look up to! Let's make it an official homework assignment!
Why is this so important to a class called LOVE 101, not JUSTICE 101? And why would that be important for campers to learn? Good question! I'm happy to see that you are starting to take some initiative! Justice is the reason that love will always conquer evil! As long as there are heroes willing to fight in the name of justice, there will always be hope and love abound in our world! Don't you feel it? Right here in this room there is more love waiting to be born than you could ever imagine! There is no limit on our heart's capability to love, just as there is no limit to just how many things we can love!
...What's the matter? You look confused! Let me help you! If you don't keep up with your studies, you'll never make it to lesson 1509: Mastering the Many Levels of Love!
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. CLOSED.
Character: Mylene Jenius
Series: Macross 7
Character Age: 17 (Macross 7 OVAs)
Canon: When you're faced with an unknown, unrelenting, incredibly strong enemy who seems to shrug off conventional weaponry, what's the reasonable thing to do? Sing to them, of course! And that's just what Nekki Basara strives to do. After the Protodevlin encounters the Macross 7 fleet, the military tries their best to fight them off with missles, reaction weaponry, and giant mecha called Valkyries. Meanwhile, Basara hops in his own special modified Valkyrie to show them that it takes just one song of rock and roll to move the universe. Along with his band, Fire Bomber, Basara sings to the galaxy, the Protodevlin, and the people of Macross 7.
Mylene Jenius is the newest and youngest member of Fire Bomber. Growing up rebellious in the shadows of her two famous parents, Max and Miria Jenius, she's fiery, spunky, and strives to prove herself to both her parents and the members of the band. A very talented bassist and vocalist in her own right, Mylene starts out as the backup singer for the small concerts Fire Bomber throws to their loyal fans. As the series goes on, she begins to mature into a young lady who understands that singing can be more powerful than violence, and puts her life on the line to let Fire Bomber's song be heard. Even though her heart is divided on choosing between Basara, or the military fighter pilot Gamlin, Mylene thinks first and foremost of her friends, her family, and everyone she wants to protect.
Sample Post:
Let's get started, it's Saturday night! ♪ How're you guys doing?
Alright everybody, are you ready for Fire Bomber's first concert at Camp Fu-fu-- Camp? We're here to play and spread our song across the universe, spanning worlds, galaxies, and the glowing lake! Do you feel the beat? The beat that Fire Bomber is all about? We're proud to represent Macross 7 on this faraway summer camp planet, and..
... even though we can't all be here, I'll sing with all I've got. Thankfully, while I was setting up for the concert, I found this nice old-fashioned laptop to play the rest of the music and I bet once we get started, we'll all be able to sing loud enough to make up for it. It takes just one song to understand the words, though if you don't understand it on the first try, just try again and try again. You might have trouble singing along with your lack of teeth, or ears, o-or jaw, if you just sing with your heart and soul, it'll get through. Just listen to our song! ... that's what he would say, isn't it?
Although... I don't think Mama was operating on the same page when she gave us this gig. When she said summer camp, she described it as exotic views, lush green scenery and charming locals with unique tastes. I've definitely seen the unique tastes! Using brains as your appetizer, main course, and dessert? That sounds so gross! I can't believe anyone would eat it but... but if it's what you like, Mr. Zombie, Fire Bomber will sing through your meal. And I bet it'll make your brains taste even... brainier!
I hoped that when she meant "exotic views' she meant a romantic beach in the sunset, or a wild jungle with incredible and beautiful creatures. I see the incredible creatures, but I don't know if I would call them beautiful. Interesting, sure. Kind of weird, sure. But-- I don't remember hearing about any big gorillas with purple fur. Purple's a nice color, but it clashes too much to be really useful, right? And I've seen telepathic rodents before but toucans? Really? Earth really is full of amazing things! But the most amazing thing of all was the beautiful zombie and ape mix. I didn't think that their child would look like that because neither apes nor zombies really resemble lizards, but with that shade of purple and that shade of green, it has to be! With "I love you, you love me", he's spreading the word of peace.
Singing about family, singing about friends... Mama was right. Everything is so beautiful and green, from the highest trees, to the native people, to the glowing lake with Ms. Marcy inside! I've never seen anything so pretty. I almost wish we could stay here forever, but... the universe is calling for us. I've got people I need to find, we all do! People at home and in the outer reaches of the galaxy, right? And I know our song tonight will reach every single one of them. This is what he would do, so... let's sing with all we've got, no more wasting time!
Camp, Mr. Barney, Ms. Marcy, sing with us tonight. Let's go everyone, Holy Lonely Night! ♪ Hurry up and believe in yourself!
Poll Vote!
Character: Zoe
Series: Old Man’s War, specifically Zoe’s Tale
Character Age: 17
Canon: Spoilers for The Ghost Brigade throughout canon Humanity has reached the stars, and found them full of xenophobic, aggressive aliens who want the same territory humans do and find human flesh tasty. So of course, the logical thing is for a bunch of xenophobic, aggressive assholes to rule the human race and thoroughly antagonize all the other species in their arm of the galaxy. Right? Well, both of Zoe’s fathers (her biological and adoptive) have seen the flaw in that particular argument, and are doing their best to stop it. Admittedly her biological father did so by making a deal with an alien race, the Obin, that he would provide them consciousnessness, for which they loved him and worshipped him enough that they agreed to destroy almost all of humanity. Fortunately he died before that plan went into effect and after the consciousness thing was underway, so their worship passed onto his daughter.
For someone whose spent her life being worshipped, watched, and protected (sometimes forcibly) by an entire alien species, and who was orphaned at the age of 8, she’s a remarkably normal teenage girl. She has loving adoptive parents, a best friend with whom she can giggle and crush the egos of teenage boys with remarkable ease, a boyfriend - she’s as normal as she can possibly be with two large and scary aliens following her around constantly, as a semi-deliberate buffer against the Obin’s efforts to turn her into an icon. She’s brave, occasionally immature, extremely sarcastic, sometimes kind of bitchy, and generally does her best to be worthy of being for virtually worshipped by an entire alien species. Some days it works better than others.
Sample Post: This place smells like armpit. Take it from me, I know stink. I am an unfortunate, long-suffering connoisseur of stink. And this place smells of Eau de Armpit, with just a little stinky gym socks parfum, with just a hint of rotting - Did that gorilla just fart at me? Eeeew.
What with the wildlife here, anyway? I mean, okay, I’m glad I haven’t encountered any people-eating werewolves. Don’t get me wrong! I could spend the rest of my life quite happily not dealing with people eating werewolves, especially around idiot teenage boys who think that hunting werewolves is a smart idea. You’d think that the fact that all the girls I know would be more likely to smack them and call them idiots with extreme sarcasm than go “Oh! You’re so strong and manly! Take me!” would provide a slight hint that that may not be the smartest thing, but nooo. Of course not! I swear, testosterone and IQ are not only inversely related, but the inverse gets higher with every ounce of teenagerhood.
I kind of like the gorillas here, though. Okay, they’re not the Earth standard gorillas you’d see in the zoo. But I think the purple really adds a certain something, you know? Add some lace and a few ribbons and you’d have the prettiest princess gorilla, thus making the endless King Kong remakes infinitely more interesting. Would Prettiest Princess Kong start kidnapping pretty boys instead?
But those animals look like people. Okay, rotting people. With bits falling off. And they’re contributing noticeably to the smell. I’d bet anything that whoever lives here calls them zombies. Or whatever the local equivalent is. Look, their call even sounds kind of like brains! Brains to you too, buddy!
So this means that, logically, the next weird alien animal I encounter should be a vampire. I’m going to hope that means mosquito rather than anything bigger. Especially with disturbing sexual overtones. Admittedly, the odds of a alien having any interest in sex with a human are surprisingly low, for most the people who’re desperately hoping otherwise. I mean, let’s face it. Yeah, there’s a few weirdoes out there in virtually any race who think having sex with humans is awesome and transgressive and hot, but for the most part, aliens are about as interested in having sex with some fleshy bipedal alien with weird sex organs as we are with having sex with some weird al-
....
What is that tentacled alien in the lake doing?
Poll Vote!
Character: Penelo
Series: Final Fantasy XII
Character Age: 17
Canon: Final Fantasy XII is a tale of politics, ruminations on history, and the ability of Man to shape his own destiny. All very heady subjects for two naive street kids get swept up in the midst of it after their kingdom is conquered by the neighboring empire. They travel the length and breadth of the land, and even into the sky, to assist their renegade princess in her quest to attain the power to reclaim her kingdom and stop the empire from engaging in yet more war.
Penelo is the lifelong friend of the (ostensibly) main character, Vaan. While he dreams of flying high as a Sky Pirate, Penelo keeps her feet firmly on the ground, running errands and taking odd jobs to make ends meet. She's quick to tease Vaan, and certainly tries to keep him out of trouble, although that's often a futile effort. She's a talented and graceful dancer, something that's evident in the way she fights; it becomes her default job class inthe games that follow. While she is normally prudent, Penelo is mindful of other's sensitivities and will be the first to come to a person's side when they are hurt or unwell. And although her sweet, polite, and compassionate nature has all the makings of a kind-hearted “Jesus” type, Penelo is really just the girl next door (who can probably kick your ass with a pirouette).
Sample Post:
This has to be the first village I've been to where they put their underwear out to dry on the trees. And they just let monsters roam around freely! No wonder the job posting for a dance instructor was under the Mark Hunts. I hope that doesn't mean that I'm the mark! Now it said that I would recognize my students by the red “V”s on their foreheads, and they would find me if I put one on mine. When they talk about “odd jobs” I don't think they meant it so literally... but someone has to put food on the table. Weirdness or no weirdness, it's time to get going! No matter what, I'll get the job done!
Hello, my name is Penelo, and I'll be your temporary dance instructor. Are you all the “Camp Funtime Undulation Dancers?” I see we all have our Vs on...Ew. Please don't lick your neighbor's V, okay? It's really nice to meet everybody, and I'm sure we'll have a lot of fun dancing! Oh...!! Is this too early in the morning for everybody? You all look so pale... and you're moaning! Omigosh, are you guys sick? Is there anything I can do? I know how to do healing magic, too. I'm not just a dancer. And I've gotten pretty good at white magic, I think. Don't just shake your heads at me like that! Being sick is serious business! How would your families feel if you went and died on them because you didn't take care of yourselves? At least promise me you guys will see a doctor after we're through today, okay?
But if you're sure that you're okay, we'll start our lesson. Your “Director” gave me a dance that she wanted me to teach you. This will be my first time with this dance, too. But I'm sure we can get through it together, even if it is pretty weird! Dance is something that comes naturally if you're trying to express yourself, I think. Keep that in mind when you're doing your warm-ups. And while you're doing that, I'm going to go over this one more time. Remember not to push yourselves too hard! I don't want you getting any sicker than you already are.
Let's see what's written here....Okay. So it's just a jump to the left...then a step to the right...put your hands on your hips, you bring your knees in tight...but it's the-HEY! What kind of dancer do they think I am!? These dancers may be under the weather, but whoever came up with this is a real sicko!
Change of plans: let's try doing this my way instead. All of you please get in a line. It's okay, please take your time! I know you guys aren't feeling very good. But mind your posture, and don't drag your knuckles on the ground! That's much better, but we all want to keep our knees a little bent so we can be nice and loose for this move. But don't get too loose! We wouldn't want anybody to get so loose that they lose their leg or something! Oh I'm just kidding, of course. Don't look so worried! This move looks pretty difficult, but it's actually pretty easy. Just hold your arms out like so, spin on the ball of your left foot, and kick your right leg out. That should be pretty simple to understand, but why don't I demonstrate for you now? Here I go!
Aaah! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to kick y-w-where's your head? D-did I just kick your head off?! This can't be happening! When they asked me if I had "killer dance moves" this isn't what I meant when I said yes!
Poll Vote!
Name: Vaan
Series: Final Fantasy XII
Age: 17
Canon: A backdrop of political conspiracy, the overthrow of government, the murder of kings: this is the scene in which FFXII takes place. With a nation ever at civil war, an unlikely alliance is formed between a small group of pirates (both famous and aspiring), a princess thought to have been dead, and a man whose betrayal to the crown is not quite what it seems. From haunted jungles to mysterious villages to the top of snow-capped peaks, this band of outlaws travels across the continent, fighting dangerous monsters and experiencing some of the most amazing phenomena any one of them has ever seen.
One of the members of this unlikely band of heroes is Vaan, a thief-turned-sky pirate. Vaan, one of the youngest of the team, maintains some of the group's much-needed curiosity. With an unrivaled thirst for adventure, Vaan's recklessness and energy has a way of grating on peoples' nerves, but he manages to remain optimistic (most of the time). Vaan's ability to get both himself and the party in trouble is sometimes an uncanny skill, one he has been slowly working on fixing. Luckily for him and everyone else involved, he manages to scrape by with a little help from his friends, particularly Penelo, his childhood companion and partner in piracy. While he may not be the most knowledgeable or cunning member of the group, Vaan is frequently the one coming up with the ideas that are just so outlandish that somehow, despite all reason and logic, they work. He can be a little cocky and carefree sometimes, especially when it comes to his dream of becoming a sky pirate, which he has aspired to for most of his life.
Note: In FFXII, one of the most prominent side quests involves hunting "marks," or monsters that go around causing trouble in various parts of the world. Your team can find different marks to hunt throughout the game.
Sample Post:
Know what? I could get used to this. I mean, yeah, this isn't the most luxurious place I've been to, but it's definitely not the worst. Sure, there are lots of zombies and monsters lurking around, but they're easy kills for me. Couple hits and they go down easy. And if they start getting to be trouble for you guys, I'm always up for hire. I'll make sure the only threat they pose is dropping bad loot, ha! Speaking of which, you'll never guess what I got from those zombies near the entrance -- twenty five pairs of pantyhose! No, I swear. Isn't that weird? Not that it's necessarily bad loot, I mean I'm sure they'll sell for a good price, but. Doesn't that seem like way too much pantyhose for some dead guys who've lost half their abdomens to be carrying? I mean, come on. What are they going to do with them, wear them on their heads? Is that zombie fashion or something?
I'm trying not to think about it too hard. Let's move on. What was I saying before... Oh yeah. I'm getting used to this place. Underwear-obsessed-zombies aside, it is so cool here. No, really! I've never seen anything like this place before -- well, okay, that's not entirely true. Woods filled with zombies and big hairy monsters I'm definitely familiar with. The smell is a new one, though. And the birds that keep staring at me like there's something on my face. And the glowing lake. And okay, maybe I've never seen a monster that particular shade of purple, but don't think for a second that I'm going to let any of that intimidate me! Far as I'm concerned, it just adds to the mystery of the whole place. I love stuff like that. Rare treasure, legendary monsters, some secret creature race that's been dead for thousands of years, technology from another world... I don't know what kinda stuff I'm going to find here. It could be anything! Pantyhose might be just the beginning. ... You know, they are pretty silky, if you try them on. Not that I have, but I imagine they would be. Heck, they could be, like. Magical pantyhose of the Ancient Gods of Siefud or something. THAT WOULD BE SO COOL. -- Hey! Don't laugh, it could totally happen! Stranger things have, right?
Anyway, I should go check this place out soon. That treasure's not going to scavenge itself, am I right? First things first, though; I have one little thing I need to do before I go anywhere. See, I signed up for a mark before I came down, so I should probably take care of her first. Level 7, name of Marcy, lives in the glowing water. Easy to find, right? I'll just fish around this lake for a while, and once she comes out, we'll be in business. Man, I can't wait to see what she looks like. I wonder if she likes pantyhose. You'd better stay back, though, for your own safety. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine; I've taken down bigger baddies than a tentacle demon. Hey, don't look so scared. Really, it's okay. You can calm down! I said I'll be fine!
... she's behind me, isn't she. Figures. Okay! That's! Okay, Vaan, you can do this. Just turn around, nice and slow, don't make any sudden movements, and --
... oh, now that is wicked cool. We are totally in business now.
Poll Vote!
Character: Richard "Richie" Osgood Foley [Alias as "Gear"]
Series: Static Shock
Character Age: 17
Canon: When a perfectly normal day was rent apart by an explosion known as the Big Bang, many ordinary students were gifted with unnatural powers- eventually given the nickname of Bang Babies. Becoming an intelligence-boosted member of this group himself despite not being present at the actual event (the theory was contamination from someone who was there), Richie's hobbies consist of everything from reading comic books to saving the planet alongside his best friend, Virgil Hawkins- better known as Static.
Possessing a cyborg of a backpack, along with various other gadgets, contraptions, and, well, gear designed by none other than himself, Richie makes juggling homework with an after school job look easy. He can be prone to overreacting at times and is probably one of the most terrible liars on the face of the planet, so it can be hard to believe that he's actually brilliant. The constant joking around doesn't help much either, nor does his tendency to let his thoughts wander out on a tangent. Thought you were talking about atoms? Try the displacement theory instead. Although he isn't anything special aside from that, friendship and loyalty are still two traits easily attributed to him. Past issues involving his father's racism bothered him for a while, yet Richie didn't falter in staying true to his friendship. He comes across as your typical teenage slacker, sure, but don't let that fool you in the least. Those machines didn't build themselves, after all.
Sample Post: Okay, alright, on the count of three, two, one-- Ow!! Projectile body limbs. There's a new one. Maybe I'll start an arm collection. Meaning, note to self: The whole innocent maiden in distress thing? So overrated. Now, back! Back, you... you... zombies... Zombies. Riiiight. You know what, that math homework is starting to look great right about now. Less facing off against legions of the undead, and more of those good old fashioned fractions. One more shot, just one more shot here! Ready backpack?
On the count of three again. One, two-- Fail? I didn't even do anything! I didn't ask for a personalized toucan narration either, actually. But... Wait. How does that even work? The next time someone decides to narrate for me, can we screen out the ones that think it's funny to bombard me with lame internet jokes? Please? Ugh, nevermind. I'll just try and ignore them. Somehow. So, ignoring, ignoring-- come ooon, think Richie, think! We've got one poor unsuspecting victim being mercilessly threatened by what appears to be an army of your typical brain-seeking zombies. If I can distract them long enough to get this "Marcy" lady away, I might not have to fight 'em. Guess that means I should... I guess I should...
Enough, enough! I can't concentrate! Will you shut up about going an hero! Do you even realize how much grammar you've just shattered? Look, I'll be glad to discuss it with you and your toucan buddies after, but right now I'm kiiind of busy. No, seriously. What does it take to get a good play by play these days? My reputation is crying. Crying, and writhing in a thousand different kinds of pain. Who's failing now, huh? Not me! Unless they said 'flailing'... Dude, I give up. Ten bucks and a week's worth of comics says that this'll start making sense the day the definition of sense is completely reversed, turned inside out, and run through a blender. Ten buck's also says I'm going to need major therapy once this is done. Probably accompanied by a thesaurus. A really, really big thesaurus. One that can fully attest to me that none of what you've been saying has any known synonyms.
Orrr maybe I'll just ask this Marcy, wherever she is. Hey, Marcy? Marcy, you around? This is the spot they said she'd be, wasn't it? Don't think I could've heard wrong. Kinda funny, though, since there hasn't been anything around here except for that giant tentacle thing in the lake. Talk about your greater than average sushi. Is it... looking at me? No, whoa, wait-- put me down, put me down!
Poll Vote!
Character: Flonne
Series: Disgaea: Hour of Darkness and Disgaea 2: Cursed Memories
Age: 1512 (Looks like a young 15 year-old)
Canon: In the power struggle for the throne in Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, Flonne finds herself acting out the role of the cute, clueless assassin angel-in-training sent to kill King Krichevskoy, unaware that King Krichevskoy was in fact already dead. Feeling sorry instead, Flonne leaves herself open to the attack of a wicked angel attempting to put her out of commission permanently, only to have Prince Laharl, the son of the late Overlord foil his plans and reclaim the item she needs to survive. For the sake of proving that demons can love, Flonne promises to help Laharl, Etna and the prince's other vassals reclaim the throne from the other, lesser demons clamoring to steal it before Laharl can make his rightful claim as the Netherworld's next Overlord.
Flonne is on all accounts a perky, happy and loving person and becoming a gFallen Angel h doesn't affect that in the slightest. She usually isn't easy to irritate, although she has a few touchy subjects such as love and her flat chest. Her goal is to spread love and make everyone, even demons, realize their potential to love, no matter their race. She is enamored by heroes of all kinds, from the likes of the Prism Rangers to heroes like Captain Gordon and his crew. Thus, Flonne also enjoys being a fan girl and an otaku at times.
Sample Post:
My fellow campers, please listen up! I have something very important to say today...
I'm a bit startled by everyone's behavior here at camp! Where is the love?! Those stuffed animals seem to love each other more than you do! I know I've only been here for a short amount of time, but I've already seen enough. This is supposed to be a fun, happy place! I mean, isn't that what the definition of camp is? Even the zombies around here seem to be nicer than some of you people. I think you really need to learn a thing or two about loving your fellow campers... and the zombies! Chopping them up just because they scare you is NOT okay. And who's idea was it to ban Hitler?! That's discrimination! I'll bet you hurt his feelings by saying he wasn't allowed in on your fun! So now that it's come to my attention, it's my duty to set things right and bring some love back into your lives. In fact, you'll love me for it!
So welcome to LOVE 101, class! I'll be your teacher from now on, so every day for two hours before lunch in the Mess Hall, you'll have class here with me, Fallen Angel Flonne! I'm fully certified to teach LOVE 101, so don't worry! You're in good hands! Lesson one: Everyone has some good in them! There's no use hiding that smile! It feels good to help people, doesn't it? I mean, everyone has a sense of justice! Justice... you know: the good in good and evil, the right in right and wrong... justice and love go hand in hand! Justice is the heroes who defend the innocent; the ones who fight with the power of love and righteousness! No wonder you're so mean! None of you have found the proper role models yet! I know! You should go out there and find at least one hero that you can look up to! Let's make it an official homework assignment!
Why is this so important to a class called LOVE 101, not JUSTICE 101? And why would that be important for campers to learn? Good question! I'm happy to see that you are starting to take some initiative! Justice is the reason that love will always conquer evil! As long as there are heroes willing to fight in the name of justice, there will always be hope and love abound in our world! Don't you feel it? Right here in this room there is more love waiting to be born than you could ever imagine! There is no limit on our heart's capability to love, just as there is no limit to just how many things we can love!
...What's the matter? You look confused! Let me help you! If you don't keep up with your studies, you'll never make it to lesson 1509: Mastering the Many Levels of Love!
Poll Vote!